Philia said:
According to respect of custom/culture, the guest of the house get the right to be comfortable regardless of who he is TO YOU. Its your mother's HOUSE, not yours. She has the right to give her guest the respect she wants to give. You were merely visiting to eat dinner and watch tv?
Yes. Which is why, although annoyed, I moved on with the request. Moving on for people who actually read...
Philia said:
You love your sisters and your mom? Then stop giving them problems.
I don't give them problems. They cause their own problems.
Philia said:
"Being a MAN" is not the solution, its being a better PERSON that is. You're upset over a lie, an supposed sin that's just as equal to "murder" especially coming from your own mother. This makes sense that you're enraged over it, but the reason behind the lie is downright silly. How do you know she's lying? What if she didn't know til she saw your sister in there and why else she then tell you? Oh... she was lying AFTER she told you? You got mad at her for telling you that you have no choice but miss 10 mins of southpark anyway?
Uhm, how she would not know that there was someone else occupying the television upstairs when that said tv is in HER OWN ROOM which she was in at the time is beyond me. Maybe magic? That sounds like someone who is ill-informed trying to find an 'out' for why she would lie. She lied. it doesn't matter what it's about. It could be about watching the last 3 minutes of Sesame Street, or about picking up three bottles of fruit punch instead of 5. Whatever. If you know you're doing something that is NOT TRUE, yet you say it anyway, it is a lie. And I don't know what world some of the GAF crew has come from, but in this world people shouldn't typically take lies - however small or big - in stride. Or else people will find ways to lie to you in bigger and more progressive ways. It's called getting walked on, and someone who is good at doing it can spot it five million miles away.
(as I said, things aren't always black and white - you may lie to avoid hurting someone's feeling, or lie to avoid a bigger problem... but none of that applies here)
If that's something you feel is fine, that's your prerogative. I choose to tell my mother that I disapproved of the lie. And then I chose to make sure she didn't try to injure me again with her purse by hitting me again. All of this I feel was the proper course of action.
Philia said:
Even if she did lie to you, that gives you no right at all to be ENRAGED at her. She's an adult woman knowing full well of the consequences and this is HER house you're in, and its her GUEST. As a son, even then you have no right to tell HER what she SHOULD DO or NOT. EVEN to not LIE to you. That's just downright dumb AND selfish.
Now this is the most moronic part of all. She invites me into her house as a guest, knowing full well the consequences, so somehow that makes it acceptable to choose if it's right to lie to me. No, in the real world,
that makes it even less ****ing acceptable. If you know the consequences and do it anyway, then you deserve each and every excruciating punishment or embarrassment that is about to come your way. I don't care if you live in the White House. I don't care if you're God reincarnate. You lie, you face the consequences. Under any ****ing building, whether you own it or not.
Philia said:
Then you go on about respect. WTG. NOT even more than half of this "silly" gaming forum that you're a MOD for is giving you ENOUGH respect. That should say something to you.
Half the forum thinks Wii is actually fun, what do they know? If my life was guided by what sheltered internet forum goers thought, I don't think we'd be on page 9 still going in circles about this subject
I enjoy the discussions I have at GAF, or I wouldn't come here. Even if they're negative like this, I do not lie or sugarcoat my feelings. I told the story exactly as it happened, and many people here disagreed with my actions. This is my responsibility, as an adult. There are others who feel I did the exact right thing, online and offline. I take each opinion exactly as it is - an opinion. In the end, I have to do what is right for me knowing what my life experiences have taught me. And so far, I've been right.
Rorschach said:
Like you, I love my sisters, but unlike you, I would never do anything to jeapordize being able to look out for them.
I wouldn't do anything to jeapordize it either. But I look at it differently. My one sister is 19, she can still visit me if she likes. She did not sign the order. It is the 17 year old who would be impacted by this, and in August she will also not be under this order if I understand correctly. It would then only pertain to me and my mother. You speak as if my sisters lost respect for me. My sisters both talked to me and understood what I had to do, although my one sister was angry that I did it in front of her fiance. But she understood. Violence is not the right cource of action for shit like this. my mom was wrong for that, and for calling the police. And Most people realize this.
So did I lose or gain respect from those I love? Maybe I lose some, maybe I gained some, maybe there's no movement. Did I choose to do this exactly the way I wanted, with minimal to no punishment? Well, it didn't look that way for a moment there when that 90 day original thing was going to go through, but not that that's out the window, I could give a ****. My mom only has control over my remaining sister for a few more months.
Rorshcach said:
I have had PLENTY of opportunities these last couple of years to **** that up, but I didn't. Instead, I swallowed my pride and looked for alternate routes. Because of this, I was able to look after them and my sick mother last year when they had no one else. I was able help the youngest make her transition to highschool and teach her a sport (who had never picked up a ball before) and she made varsity! I was able to help the other with her academics and now she's getting a free ride to the college she hand picked last year. I never had anyone who could answer questions, give advice, or look up to when I was growing up, but I'm happy to be able to give that, and some stability, to them. As a big brother, you have to think about what's best for them sometimes. What's more important to you? What do you think they will respect more? You'll never earn your mother's respect the way you want it and society doesn't give a **** about giving you that respect you crave either. So what is there to gain? Weigh it against what you can lose.
This is such a watershed quote around here. Who lost respect for me? Some neoGAFers? I'm sorry to hear that. I interact more with people in the real world though, and around here where I live, it's generally considered a good thing to stick up for oneself and not get walked on. There's always a "within reason" clause, but I think many people felt that preventing ones mother from hitting them with a heavy purse is well within that clause. I guess that's just where me and GAF disagree. I know and think about my future before I do things, and that's precisely why goading half-assed cops wasn't something that made me nervous. Because there was no reprecautions for it, only my own personal entertainment.
So I guess GAFers won't agree with me here. Wouldn't be the first time won't be the last. But I don't come here to have my every viewpoint agreed with. I spoke honestly, and the response is what it is.