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Today, I am a Father: A Homebirth Account
- Thread starter Karsticles
- Start date
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hodayathink
Member
Honestly, you'd want to be in a hospital if something went wrong, but if you've already got the okay from a doctor that everything is probably going to be normal, I don't see why home birthing should be seen as a bad thing, or even about shunning modern medicine (as in it can be, but doesn't have to be).
Well, I'm with you.
I had 3 children and had some complications during 2 of the 3. I am SO very happy I was at a hospital. I don't think I would have my daughter (my 1st born) and would probably not be alive for my 2nd son. Thankfully, through medication and oxygen, everything turned out very well.
My placentas were much more bloody/red and I donated them. I can't imagine eating myself (or someone else doing the same). I guess it just depends on what you are comfortable with. I went to the same hospital and had the same doctor for all three births. My husband, children, family and I were amazingly comfortable and taken care of. But I circumcised my boys so... I can't be trusted.
GhostWriter24
Member
We all did, but it's the miracle of life, dude!!
lot of fear-based talk and of course the medical community is split over homebirths, with some saying it's not a big deal as long as you fully prepare and also get checkups to precaution for any complications. And then others saying that the potential risks are far too great, you can't prepare for every complication, and that you should come to their hospitals to be completely safe.
It's not like there aren't any conflicting interests in this, but the health industry has so many conflicting interests, it makes me wonder if midwifery might be a good alternative for change.
entremet
Member
Curious, what so bad about hospital births? Both your gf and the OP and wife seem to be hesitant of them.
lucebuce12
Member
Oddly enough, the only thing in this thread that made me even slightly queasy was the insinuation that OP was gonna actually eat some of the placenta.
entremet
Member
Surprised many people haven't heard of this.
hammysaurusrex
Member
While I agree it's unfair, it wouldn't be an entirely unfounded assumption - nothing makes a pediatrician's skin crawl like a "midwife" with an online degree from Something College of Natural Medicine poisoning a mother's mind about the safety and efficacy of vaccines. I'm not saying this describes the person the OP hired, but finding midwives associated with the anti-vaccine movement is not uncommon. Unfortunately, "professional" midwife means a lot of different things depending on which state you are on.
Also, people should be in general cautious about their rhetoric. Home birthing is a fine option for a low risk pregnancy, but there are also a lot of situations where we can't really assess high risk until it's too late. It's easy to find legitimate criticism with how hospital births in the US are managed, but at the same time there are plenty children and mothers who would be dead today without those "evil" c-sections and precautions in place. Let's not insult them by pretending they aren't "real mothers" for not doing things the natural way. Once again, I am not accusing the OP of doing this - just saying I've observed a lot of conversations about home-birthing that take a winding road that ultimately ends up using those kind of talking points. Advocacy is fine, but self-righteousness is obnoxious.
depends on the service. if you're poor, no health insurance, don't have your own obstetrician helping you through but just someone on duty to delivery the child, you have a really different experience than someone who has been seeing a doctor for 9 months and will be there to hand hold you through the process. A lot of women get the first one, where they go in, get cut, get handed a baby and a bill, an overnight stay for a day or 2 and then they're back home. And a lot of women didn't know where was any alternative to what they considered impersonal and cold medical procedure for bringing their child into the world.
Dice//
Banned
I thought Tom Cruise made it popular... or some celeb did it.
entremet
Member
OP posted about it in another thread. They're some new age shit about how they need to do it otherwise the baby won't "attach" to them. It's bs evopsych taken all the way down to the birth.
Glad it went well for the OP, but the reasoning is couched in as much reality as horoscopes.
Dice//
Banned
Well I mean Cruise made it "pop culture popular" again, for the modern layman less informed about ...y'know, placenta eating histories. x)
Karsticles
Member
Roman also passed the Spartan elder test (finger clamping), which made me happy. 
I checked it as soon as he left the vaginal canal.
If your pregnancy is at-risk, then a hospital is the place to be. If you're not, there's really no danger. Our midwife has delivered >800 babies, and has never had a mortality. She has had to transport mothers to the hospital due to complications. Not everyone can have a home birth, but if you can have a home birth, it offers many advantages.
1) Dry the placenta in a jerky-like process.
2) Cut the placenta into strips.
3) Grind the placenta into small bits.
4) Place the bits into pill form for easy consuming.
I completely respect that cesarian sections are a necessary medical procedure, and save many infant lives. I am glad that your children turned out fine.
We also plan on home schooling him - I don't trust teachers.
Her water breaking didn't cause a big mess. The equivalent of wet panties, really. She was so tired by the time everything concluded that she was nodding off in-between contractions. Her contractions also woke her up - funny coincidence between you both!
We were prepared to go to a hospital if things went poorly. The hospital near us has a very pro-baby approach, so I wouldn't have been devastated if we had to go. The acknowledge the importance of the Golden Hour, and have charts showing successful latch rates and lowered C-section rates throughout the last year. I think a hospital that is proud of those accomplishments is a good place to be, if that's where you have to be.
Thank you for posting the research! I hope others read it.
Roman has been sleeping peacefully for most of the last day. The only time he has cried is when he had trouble latching to my wife's right breast.
I checked it as soon as he left the vaginal canal.I think it's just over 1MB, IIRC.
Now I have someone to train. :-OCongrats!
No more Smash 4 for Karst
Encapsulation = turning into pills. Some people fry up the placenta, but that isn't what my wife wanted to do.
If your pregnancy is at-risk, then a hospital is the place to be. If you're not, there's really no danger. Our midwife has delivered >800 babies, and has never had a mortality. She has had to transport mothers to the hospital due to complications. Not everyone can have a home birth, but if you can have a home birth, it offers many advantages.
Wow, congratulations! I had no idea you were pregnant. I'm glad you appreciate the account - I just want to share my personal experience. Everyone is welcome to do as they like or prefer.
Me too. Come back to FGW and post sometimes.
The process, as I understand it, is:
1) Dry the placenta in a jerky-like process.
2) Cut the placenta into strips.
3) Grind the placenta into small bits.
4) Place the bits into pill form for easy consuming.
I completely respect that cesarian sections are a necessary medical procedure, and save many infant lives. I am glad that your children turned out fine.
Yes. I have had an obsession with cannibalism for much of my life, and this is probably my only real chance to eat human flesh. I'll try a pill and a "jerky slice".
It's only like that because of the water. She bled a lot more in the bed, though.
We didn't have to take care of the pool at all. The midwife brought a sub pump and pumped the blood down our toilet, and she packed the entire thing up. She was like a third team member throughout the entire thing. She also taught my wife how to breast feed, and will continue to act as a lactation consultant.
Like what?
I am! I am a big fan of modern science, but I also think that it has overextended itself in some ways.
I am extremely confident in my parenting beliefs. I plan on saying a lot of "Thank you for sharing that" to folks so they go away, haha.
We also plan on home schooling him - I don't trust teachers.Her water breaking didn't cause a big mess. The equivalent of wet panties, really. She was so tired by the time everything concluded that she was nodding off in-between contractions. Her contractions also woke her up - funny coincidence between you both!
We were prepared to go to a hospital if things went poorly. The hospital near us has a very pro-baby approach, so I wouldn't have been devastated if we had to go. The acknowledge the importance of the Golden Hour, and have charts showing successful latch rates and lowered C-section rates throughout the last year. I think a hospital that is proud of those accomplishments is a good place to be, if that's where you have to be.
It's unlikely that if our midwife has done 800+ successful deliveries, that we will be the first death. She knows what she is doing. Thanks for calling me stupid and posting a random Youtube video that I won't watch, though. I appreciate it.
If you go back farther, it was even worse. In the early 1900s, women were so drugged up that they lost consciousness. My grandmother was strapped down to a bed like a mental patient. This is discussed a lot in Father-Coached Childbirth (not a fantastic book, in my opinion, but I read it...).
Yes, I am aware of this. Natural birth also leads to higher breast latch rates, lowers chances of post-partum depression, and increased parental bonding (your body releases specific "falling in love" chemicals while pushing the baby through the vaginal canal - these don't release if you have a C-section, which, IMHO, might be related to how some women feel disconnected from their children after birth).
Thank you for posting the research! I hope others read it.
I have a chemistry degree, so I'm not a Luddite.
Roman has been sleeping peacefully for most of the last day. The only time he has cried is when he had trouble latching to my wife's right breast.
I will.
t-storm
Member
Longer than that... my son is four and I can count the number of games I've played on one hand since he was born.
Dice//
Banned
Hah Karsticles I admire you sticking to your guns and calling out some of the silly stuff
Honestly, I'm not sure why exactly, but TTOOOONNNS of these are shared [for the public] on YouTube... full view and all if you wanna see it. x)
User 100115
Banned
I am extremely confident in my parenting beliefs. I plan on saying a lot of "Thank you for sharing that" to folks so they go away, haha.
Her water breaking didn't cause a big mess. The equivalent of wet panties, really. She was so tired by the time everything concluded that she was nodding off in-between contractions. Her contractions also woke her up - funny coincidence between you both!
We were prepared to go to a hospital if things went poorly. The hospital near us has a very pro-baby approach, so I wouldn't have been devastated if we had to go. The acknowledge the importance of the Golden Hour, and have charts showing successful latch rates and lowered C-section rates throughout the last year. I think a hospital that is proud of those accomplishments is a good place to be, if that's where you have to be.
The placenta thing is interesting, thanks for sharing!
And yeah, all my kids are healthy. My last, my daughter, nearly killed us both. She was conceived in the 'wrong' uterus (it was underdeveloped), I was on bed rest most of the pregnancy, and she was born two months early. NICU saved her life, but I didn't even get to see her beyond reaching out and touching her incubator from my hospital bed for a week - she had to be life flighted to another state, and I was still in to much danger to move. That sucked, but we have a great bond none the less, and she is totally fine now (though very small for her age)
As for the water breaking thing...Man I was NOT expected that. It was literally like a huge water balloon had popped in my stomach. It was the craziest feeling. I froze for a moment like 'why the fuck is there a huge puddle on my bedroom floor' before freaking out and shaking my husband awake. He jumped out of bed and splashed right into it lol.
I don't remember, but he says it had the most interesting smell. Not a bad smell, but like, earthy and shit, like he'd stumbled into a damp cave in a forest or something. That was interesting to know!
Anyways, TMI, I was unconscious for all three of my kids births, and we still have an awesome bond and they are awesome, and I am glad your kid is awesome too
Remember to get those vaccines though!Dynamite Shikoku
Congratulations, you really deserve it!
Don't forget to home school him too.
After a horrible hospital experience with our first kid, my wife had our last two at home. Both births went smoothly, would do it again (except wouldn't cause 3 kids are enough).
Pretty sure for both of these ultrasound would have caught the problem before hand and homebirth would have been ruled out? The thing about homebirth is they only let you go through with it if it's a low-risk pregnancy. At least the midwifes we went with were like that.
Pretty sure for both of these ultrasound would have caught the problem before hand and homebirth would have been ruled out? The thing about homebirth is they only let you go through with it if it's a low-risk pregnancy. At least the midwifes we went with were like that.
Karsticles
Member
Sub pump and a long hose!
GMO foods and vaccines are fine. GMO food gets digested just like any other food - there's nothing risky about it.
The midwife did give the baby a vitamin K shot after he was born, and I wasn't keen on that. Just because it made him cry, and was clearly painful. :-/
I am sensitive to vaccine issues, though. They absolutely do not cause autism, but when I was an infant, an overdose of vaccines, combined with a medical allergy, almost killed me. Imagine being inflicted with this at 2 years of age:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stephen_Johnson's_Syndrome
Yeah. As I have mentioned in other threads, Obamacare fucked my health insurance over. It went up 70% last year, and another 40% this year. It would be $900/month, with my workplace kicking in $300/month already, to cover me, my wife, and my son. For just my wife and I, it would be $550. I had to drop health insurance, and she is now covered by medicaid. That all happened in the last month, though.
I have a co-worker who is a nurse, and she also prefers home births. I have talked to many women, and none have said otherwise. I hope everything goes well for you and your girlfriend.
There's nothing a doctor checks for that a midwife doesn't. Our midwives was far, far more thorough than our M.D. we started off with. An experienced midwife will have a better idea if your child is at risk than a doctor, because established midwives spend a lot more time with you. My wife met every other week with her midwife for an hour, and got a check-up. Blood work, ultrasounds, blood pressure - all the stuff doctors do, midwives do, too. Obviously, just as in the world of doctors, quality of results are going to vary. We thoroughly researched our midwife selection before interviewing and hiring her.
The tipping point of being wary of hospitals was the lack of guarantee that OUR doctor would be available during the birth. It could be any doctor at all that's on staff when a woman goes into labor, and you might not have even met him/her. My wife is an abuse victim, so the idea that a random man she had never met before could come up and examine her was a red flag for us. In contrast, we called our midwife at 12:30AM, and she drove right over to set everything up for us. She didn't leave until 8AM the next day, and we were her only "patient". You'll never get that kind of focused attention from a doctor.
I encourage you to do your own research. This is the book I read in preparation:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/055338516X/?tag=neogaf0e-20
I do not consider it a good book. Dr. Bradley repeats himself so, so many times. You will want to cut Florida off of the United States by the 10th time he mentions someone drinking orange juice after labor. The content is generally good (sometimes bogus). It does teach you about how to help your wife during labor, though.
This is the book that midwives talk up and recommend to people looking to see what home births are all about:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0553381156/?tag=neogaf0e-20
I have not read it, but my wife has, and she is fond of it.
If you want something more like a textbook-like read on the subject, check this out:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0452276594/?tag=neogaf0e-20
I don't remember how I found out about eating the placenta. I think I learned about it ~10 years ago in college. My wife has an anthropology degree, so she and I have read a lot about tribal customs. There's no scientific evidence that eating placenta provides any kind of unique health benefit, but it's something she wanted to try. Some women (anecdotally) find that it increases energy and lactation rates. Others have said it makes them feel anxious. It could all be a placebo - who knows. While I greatly respect the scientific method, I'm also not someone who feels like I need science to justify everything I do in life.
He was under blood-colored water for the birth. Hard to take a picture.
We're doing that.
Oh wow, so...how does the double-uterus thing work? Any articles I could read? I haven't heard about that before.The placenta thing is interesting, thanks for sharing!
And yeah, all my kids are healthy. My last, my daughter, nearly killed us both. She was conceived in the 'wrong' uterus (it was underdeveloped), I was on bed rest most of the pregnancy, and she was born two months early. NICU saved her life, but I didn't even get to see her beyond reaching out and touching her incubator from my hospital bed for a week - she had to be life flighted to another state, and I was still in to much danger to move. That sucked, but we have a great bond none the less, and she is totally fine now (though very small for her age)
As for the water breaking thing...Man I was NOT expected that. It was literally like a huge water balloon had popped in my stomach. It was the craziest feeling. I froze for a moment like 'why the fuck is there a huge puddle on my bedroom floor' before freaking out and shaking my husband awake. He jumped out of bed and splashed right into it lol.
I don't remember, but he says it had the most interesting smell. Not a bad smell, but like, earthy and shit, like he'd stumbled into a damp cave in a forest or something. That was interesting to know!
Anyways, TMI, I was unconscious for all three of my kids births, and we still have an awesome bond and they are awesome, and I am glad your kid is awesome too
My wife was worried that her water would break in bed and ruin it, but I was honestly just too tired and lazy to put a plastic sheet over it. We got lucky.
It's a birth thread, so anyone coming in should expect "TMI". ;-)
I've already told all of my students at school that I'm eating the placenta, so I'm pretty comfortable talking about this (I'm a teacher).
Yeah, you can tell who just doesn't know anything about midwives. Like the midwife is just a lady down the street with no credentials or medical background at all.
way more
Member
Do you have a picture of the placenta? You know those things have great healing properties. You can do so much with them and it would be a total waste to simply throw it away.
Edit: Oh, I missed the Spoiler Pic. That is a perfect specimen of a placenta. You could get '$300 for that. It's full of life and uncontaminated by drugs.
Edit: Oh, I missed the Spoiler Pic. That is a perfect specimen of a placenta. You could get '$300 for that. It's full of life and uncontaminated by drugs.
ldcommando
Banned
Will wait for the review on the placenta jerky
entremet
Member
Not for images lol
User 100115
Banned
Nope, it was not caught on ultrasound. When one uterus was 'pregnant' the other was collapsed. They only found out about the two uterus thing when the cut me open and dug around.
And babies usually turn upside down sometime during the last month of pregnancy. My last ultrasound had show him to be in correct position, but the contractions had somehow moved him maybe? He was transverse breech, there was no way he was coming out. They thought about trying to manually turn him and try from there, but he heartbeat stopped during a contraction so they rushed me to the OR. So glad they didn't try, I likely would have died. My cervix was basically only half a cervix lol.
Another fucking odd one: During my last incredibly high risk pregnancy, I was having contractions a lot pretty much the whole last two months, and one time they were worried enough to see if I was dilated. They couldn't find my cervix. After some INCREDIBLY invasive searching by several different doctors, they finally did a transvaginal ultrasound and discovered my uterui had freaking flipped over. My cervix was directly under my belly button. I didn't know that was a thing could actually happen.
This of course made the whole 'holding off premature labor' thing worse because contractions tend to focus downward, and without a cervix to absorb (or whatever) them, they instead just kept thinning the walls of the uterus until I nearly bled to death, hence, the two month early emergency c-section that time
Last kid though. Had it all fucking removed after that. Two uterus are NOT better than one.
Oh wow, so...how does the double-uterus thing work? Any articles I could read? I haven't heard about that before.
My wife was worried that her water would break in bed and ruin it, but I was honestly just too tired and lazy to put a plastic sheet over it. We got lucky.
It's a birth thread, so anyone coming in should expect "TMI". ;-)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uterus_didelphys
I however did not have cervices and I seriously fucking quote my doctor "I don't think you have two vaginas."
Also, very glad this didn't happen:
GhostWriter24
Member
MMmmmm...cold placenta sandwiches...
Aaron Strife
Banned
You should have gone with Breckin
I'm howling
DJ_Lae
Member
Congrats!
Our third daughter was a home birth a few months ago, and we enjoyed the experience as well - many times over because it meant no last minute trying to ensure the kids were looked after, and both of them (sort of) stayed asleep during the whole experience.
My wife said in hindsight she would have preferred to not have the tub, as while it helped with some of the pain it also meant she couldn't move around nearly as much and felt really constrained.
It wasn't really an issue of cost here in Canada, either. First daughter was a fully medicated birth in hospital, epidural and everything. Second was in hospital but completely natural as she came insanely fast. Third took a bit longer at home only because she was huge (over 10 pounds, significantly bigger than the other two).
Birthing pool mainly contained bits of birthing lining and other fun stuff (no poop). Like you I had to capture that moment, as I was an idiot and didn't buy a pump with the birthing pool. So I had to empty the goddamn thing bucket by bucket into the toilet.
Home birth rates have risen here - still only 2% of total births, though. For low risk pregnancies, however, I think they're pretty awesome. Way less stressful than hospital births...though perhaps some of that is just that we've done both and knew what to expect this time.
Agreed. Well, some days I might even say three kids are too much, but you've got me on a good day.
Our third daughter was a home birth a few months ago, and we enjoyed the experience as well - many times over because it meant no last minute trying to ensure the kids were looked after, and both of them (sort of) stayed asleep during the whole experience.
My wife said in hindsight she would have preferred to not have the tub, as while it helped with some of the pain it also meant she couldn't move around nearly as much and felt really constrained.
It wasn't really an issue of cost here in Canada, either. First daughter was a fully medicated birth in hospital, epidural and everything. Second was in hospital but completely natural as she came insanely fast. Third took a bit longer at home only because she was huge (over 10 pounds, significantly bigger than the other two).
Birthing pool mainly contained bits of birthing lining and other fun stuff (no poop). Like you I had to capture that moment, as I was an idiot and didn't buy a pump with the birthing pool. So I had to empty the goddamn thing bucket by bucket into the toilet.
Home birth rates have risen here - still only 2% of total births, though. For low risk pregnancies, however, I think they're pretty awesome. Way less stressful than hospital births...though perhaps some of that is just that we've done both and knew what to expect this time.
Agreed. Well, some days I might even say three kids are too much, but you've got me on a good day.
freenudemacusers
Member
we need to get bbq gaf in here for some spice rub recommendations.
entremet
Member
lol
hodayathink
Member
Yeah, that is what I meant (a medical professional who actually knows what they're doing looking over all the medical data and determining whether or not there's a probability of complications). If your midwife that was the one doing that, then of course that's fine. And I can understand how the idea of not having your doctor available at the birth would be a legitimately worrisome issue. I actually went through some of this stuff when my sister had her child, as the father wasn't really around. Lucky for us, her doctor was available for part of the birth, especially since she did have unforeseen complications arise.
Ronabo
Member
Wonder what kinda beer goes with a placenta too?
You don't actually have to have epidurals for birthing its an option for women. My wife gave birth to our kids with zero drugs, she didn't even want to take pills of any kind during pregnancy. I guess whats important though is that he got here safe and he's doing great even if it meant arriving in a blood pool.
Bloodbirth pool is a great band name btw I'm trademarking it.
Bloodbirth pool is a great band name btw I'm trademarking it.
Blackstarhat
Member
I want children someday. if its a boy im going to name it link if its a girl im going to name it zelda.
User 100115
Banned
I find that a bit too nerdy, and I named my daughter Serenity
Kidding, name them whatever you want hehe.
entremet
Member
He said he's vaccinating.
It's late so maybe I missed it, sorry. All I saw was him saying he is sensitive about the vaccine thing and also didn't want the baby to have a vitamin K shot.
Just please vaccinate your kids. That's all. If you are, then cool!
Also, congrats on baby.
Nappuccino
Member
You're not going to name your third kid "Tri-force" are you?
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