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[ZOONAMI]

Interesting. Never been in salt water. I always get jealous of people who can float like nothing. I also have asthma so that's probably why I can't properly float? I can doggie paddle for some time until my body just gets tired, lol.

Yeah the asthma doesn’t help, the idea is to inhale as much as possible and hold your breath to allow you to float easier, then when you need to breathe you exhale and use your arms and legs a bit to again inhale to avoid sinking. You don’t want to hold your breath to the point of absolutely needing air, as that would just tire you out.

It’s so easy to float in the ocean I don’t really have any fear of going quite aways out if things are relatively calm. More afraid of sharks than the water itself lol. Swam way out to this platform in the bay of biscay where everyone else was taking boats. I was mainly worried about sharks.

 

[StrawberryJam]

I can't swim nor can I use a can opener. I don't know which is worse.

EDIT: I worked on boats for two years and hung off the side of them so I guess the swimming thing is probably worse.

 

[Astral/H3X]

I can't stop posting on neogaf.

He said simple not impossible.

 

[Andrew J.]

Can't whistle or snap my fingers.

 

[gutterboy44]

Finger whistle crowd, I am on board to to make this a goal to learn. This video already helped more than that diagram being posted. The push your tongue back and cover teeth with lips is key. Already starting to get a sound.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYpmyE1fliE

 

[BLOODED_hands]

Yeah the asthma doesn’t help, the idea is to inhale as much as possible and hold your breath to allow you to float easier, then when you need to breath you exhale and use your arms and legs a bit to again inhale to avoid sinking. You don’t want to hold your breath to the point of absolutely needing air, as that would just tire you out.

It’s so easy to float in the ocean I don’t really have any fear of going quite aways out if things are relatively calm. More afraid of sharks than the water itself lol. Swam way out to this platform in the bay of biscay where everyone else was taking boats. I was mainly worried about sharks.

Gotcha. Thanks my dude. It's still warm in MN (I'm sure you know, lol) but I don't think I'll be in the water anytime soon. Gotta wait until next year now

 

[tonysidaway]

Remember basic cooking related measurements

How many teaspoons in a cup, How many fluid ounces is a tablespoon, that kind of stuff. I gotta ask Alexa like 7 times Everytime I'm making something

Have you tried switching to metric? A teaspoon is about 5 millilitres, a tablespoon is about 15. A litre of water or juice weighs a kilogramme. There are 1,000 millithings in any thing (litres, grammes, metres, pedes, amperes, volts, whatever

Spoiler

just kidding about the millipedes

).

There are many Googlable recipes that give both metric and American traditional measurements.

 

[JB1981]

Hang curtains

 

[Firemind]

Masturbate

 

[RubxQub]

Bank any kind of geographical information. I can't tell you what streets are around me, I can't explain to you how to get to me if you're nearby, I don't remember how to drive over to your house without a GPS, no clue which direction of the highway I get on every day.

My brain just doesn't bank any of this information unless I personally have gone on a specific route a dozen times.

I'm totally fine with this, but literally everyone who starts talking to me about this kind of stuff "where do you live?" "what's that by?" "oh why don't you take x route to get to me?" I just blank and tell them to either give me an address or send them a link to maps with my pointed out on it.

I've completely given over this information to by phone.

In the days before GPS, I would barely scrape by with Mapquest and Google Maps to get places and it was often a nightmare.

 

[g11]

Whistle using fingers
Roll my Rs at all
Make quality small talk
Dance without looking like a spastic
Tell a story coherently
Read human social cues

 

[Hoo-doo]

As a dutchman, it blows my mind people don't know how to ride a bike.

Over here that's like saying you don't know how to walk or breathe.

 

[Switch Back 9]

As a dutchman, it blows my mind people don't know how to ride a bike.

Over here that's like saying you don't know how to walk or breathe.

I feel the same way about people who can't swim. I've been in water literally since before I could walk or talk, but I'm very aware that not everyone had a similar upbringing. I get it, but the concept is so natural to me at this point it's very much like walking or breathing.

 

[Hoo-doo]

I feel the same way about people who can't swim. I've been in water literally since before I could walk or talk, but I'm very aware that not everyone had a similar upbringing. I get it, but the concept is so natural to me at this point it's very much like walking or breathing.

Yeah, same with swimming too. That's taught to nearly everyone here in primary school.

I mean, I couldn't imagine enjoying a summer vacation or trip if I didn't know how to swim.

 

[Morrigan Stark]

Bolded is considered simple? I can whistle, but never the high-pitched finger whistle.

It's sorcery.

Ah, I don't know. People have been posting it in this thread so I'm just echoing it.

 

[mhayes86]

I was going to say whistle, but with the number of responses here saying the same thing, maybe it's not so simple after all. I can whistle by blowing some air between my two front teeth, but it's not loud at all. I cannot whistle using only my lips or even with fingers for the life of me.

Small talk is the bane of my existence.

 

[bigkrev]

Oh boy, tons of things

-Pump my own gas. I've lived most of my life in New Jersey (Self Service is illegal) and the years I've spent outside the state I didn't own a car. I now work in Pennsylvania, and having to pump my own gas is something that I have to do once in a while and it legitimatly gives me anxiety each time. Still haven't figured out how you can just leave it in your car without having to hold the trigger the whole time!

-Open an envelop If someone hands me an envelope, i'll make a crack in the side, and then just tear the thing to pieces and hope to god I don't damage the contents.

-Fold shirts I TRY, but they always just end up in balls after a brief struggle

-Make "Guttural R" sounds I had UPPP surgery, and have no Uvula anymore, making it impossible to roll my Rs and pronounce foregn words

 

[Barberetti]

Burp. My body will burp if it needs to, but I can't do it .. err .. manually.

 

[jelly]

A pull up.

I wouldn't consider myself unfit or weak nor overweight but I just can't do that.

 

[RoadHazard]

For the longest time I couldn't whistle outward, only inward. I'm still much better at the latter. Much cleaner, more solid tone, although not very loud.

Also can't whistle using my fingers.

 

[ElectricBanquet]

Shuffle cards, aside from the most simple shuffle of just cutting the deck over and over.

I've tried several times to learn to shuffle cards the way I see most people do it (riffle shuffle I think), but I can never seem to get how to do it.

 

[megarockexe]

Eat chicken or any meat on a bone. >_< I’m terrible at trying to cut meat off of its bone and when I try I waste half of it so I try to stick to boneless meat.

Also this.
I won't even go as far as trying to get to the bone. The mere thought is absolutely disgusting. That means no chicken wings. No ribs. Barely any pork chops as well.
Everyone else seems to get by just fine. But I can't and won't.

 

[Therin]

- can't parallel park & i am extermely intimidated in difficult parking situations (like in asian supermarket parking lots where you have to battle for a tiny space)

- can't flirt to save my life, i have literally never dated before (my first & only bf was a long time friend before we got together so i dont really consider it dating)

- can't drive myself to the airport, especially if it's like LAX (im 28 & still need to ask my dad or a friend to take me there)

- can't dance. even if its my favorite song. =__=

 

[ZOONAMI]

Gotcha. Thanks my dude. It's still warm in MN (I'm sure you know, lol) but I don't think I'll be in the water anytime soon. Gotta wait until next year now

That heat wave was actually nice. Don’t think we’ll be seeing 80s/90s again until may lol.

 

[StoneFox]

Depends on the blinds but sometimes it takes me ages to draw down Venetian blinds lol.

It's all technique.

Pulling left (at a slight angle outwards as well) releases the blinds and lets them fall down. Pulling right locks them into place. If the strings are uneven you'll get a mess, but you can just pull to the left to drop them down until they are leveled out. You have to operate them slowly if you want to avoid mishaps.

 

[brickarts295]

Find love.

 

[Matsukaze]

I couldn't whistle if my life depended on it. Something super simple, but it never clicked w me.

 

[Rhomega Beta]

Cleaning, or other detail-oriented jobs. I always miss something.

 

[Devilgunman]

I can't initiate conversation to a total stranger.

 

[Wood Man]

Tie a tie

I really should know how to do it, but I've only had to do it 5 or 6 times in my life. Every time I have to do it I forget and run off to youtube.

I can't spit.This is what me spitting looks like:

 

[kendrid]

Oh boy, tons of things

-Pump my own gas. I've lived most of my life in New Jersey (Self Service is illegal) and the years I've spent outside the state I didn't own a car. I now work in Pennsylvania, and having to pump my own gas is something that I have to do once in a while and it legitimatly gives me anxiety each time. Still haven't figured out how you can just leave it in your car without having to hold the trigger the whole time!

Once you have squeezed the handle, there is a metal flap that you fold down and it will keep the gas going. When your car is full it will automatically shut off.

The amazing thing is that image already exist on Google images. I didn't have to make it.

 

[thesuperfunk]

Caring.

 

[GKSilKamina]

Add me to Club "Can't Ride a Bike". The second my training wheels came off when I was a little kid I was done with the bike. My parents didn't bother encouraging me to keep trying, and I basically ignored bikes for most of my life after that. I occasionally try one out just for fun but I still don't really know what I'm doing.

Also I can't swim well. I'm capable of floating and doggy-paddling and that's about it.

Also can't roll r's. Learning Italian and being incapable of rolling r's makes me sound like a complete doofus.

 

[Sesha]

I'm not a decent swimmer. I can swim, but I spend a lot of effort and am not efficient.
I can't finger whistle.
Can barely snap my fingers, and only using my thumb and ring finger.
I can't drive, blow bubblegum or do tricks with yo-yos.
I have very poor balance in my right leg, so I can't skate, ice or otherwise, and I can barely ski for the same reason.

 

[KmA]

- can't parallel park & i am extermely intimidated in difficult parking situations (like in asian supermarket parking lots where you have to battle for a tiny space)

- can't flirt to save my life, i have literally never dated before (my first & only bf was a long time friend before we got together so i dont really consider it dating)

- can't drive myself to the airport, especially if it's like LAX (im 28 & still need to ask my dad or a friend to take me there)

- can't dance. even if its my favorite song. =__=

Literally everything you said is me except I can dance. I'm adorable when I dance lol

 

[gngf123]

I can't spit.This is what me spitting looks like:

Okay, yeah this is definitely my one.


Oh... and sitting upright with legs straight. But that's more because of injury than anything else.

 

[Kotetsu534]

Whistle, make friends.

 

[tonysidaway]

I can't spit.This is what me spitting looks like:

If I happened to glance at that on another thread, I might just assume it's a spit-play porn thing.

I'm a fairly weedy spitter, which is only embarrassing when I'm at the dentist.

 

[RespectThySole]

Whistle

 

[DeployThatPizza]

Whistle or snap with my right hand. For the longest time, I also didn't know how to tie my shoes.

 

[SliceSabre]

Snap my fingers.

Make friends not on the internet.

 

[Col WillieSharp]

I don't think I tie my shoelaces correctly.
I remember learning how as a little boy, but then I ran through a few years of Kangaroo velcro sneakers (with the little pocket) and by the time I got laced-up sneakers again, I had forgotten. I double knot the laces, but something is always "off", and even the double knots come undone.

 

[ElectricBanquet]

I can't initiate conversation to a total stranger.

That's hard for a lot of people. You can do it, but it takes practice and an acceptance that you're going to suck at it at first.

 

[tonysidaway]

I don't think I tie my shoelaces correctly.
I remember learning how as a little boy, but then I ran through a few years of Kangaroo velcro sneakers (with the little pocket) and by the time I got laced-up sneakers again, I had forgotten. I double knot the laces, but something is always "off", and even the double knots come undone.

Try a single knot but send the loop through a second time. It holds very tight and also has the advantage that it _usually_ comes loose the same as a single when you want to take the shoes off. I got this from a Reader's Digest. The only other benefits accruing from the Digest are a gargantuan vocabulary and a keen appreciation of military humour.

 

[Herne]

Can't whistle, and what's funny is that I used to get some kind of sound, but not in many years now. Could never snap my fingers.

Many, many, many other things.

 

[Necron]

Well, this has certainly been a depressing thread.

For me: driving a car... but I'm working on it.

 

[inner-G]

Whistle properly (can only kind of whistle in an inhaling fashion)

 

[balohna]

I can drive but I kind of suck at it. I'm a 29 year old man. I didn't get my license until I was 21, and then drove like once a week for a few months (borrowed my mom's car), then basically didn't drive again until I was 27. Got a car with my now-wife, and she's been the primary driver. I now drive like twice a month maybe and still make dumb mistakes. No accidents though, so that's cool I guess.

 

[Gai Murakumo]

Tie a tie

Ditto

 

[Freeza Under The Shower]

I can't dance
I can't sing
I'm just standing here selling everything