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Phoenix infant dies in hot car - second such death in city in 2 days (Read the OP)
- Thread starter Donos
- Start date
Hitlersaurus Christ
Banned
This happens all the time in AZ, along with kids falling into pools and drowning. It's just one of those things that comes with summer there.
not to be 'that guy' but you should cut this trolling crap out.
Its way easier to get banned for it than you think.
use your words and learn when to bow out (fyi, no i do not agree with your stance)
Yeah maybe I should go. Rather not stoop down to passive aggressive trash talking like someone on here.
I don't think it's a case of legality here.
With the occasional twisted exception, none of the parents here are willfully violating the law. Given the chance, they would gladly have taken their children with them.
The point that the scientific study is showing is that these memory lapses are possible and are more likely to happen depending on how busy (or sleep deprived) the parent is. I don't have a car, so I never had to deal with this particular demon, and thankfully, I've never had this happen to me in terms of forgetting a sleeping child somewhere in their baby cart, but I think you get so wrapped up in the stuff you have to do that day, that it's not impossible to forget a sleeping child in the car.
I can't help but point out the irony of your statement here.
FantasticMrFoxdie
Mumber
Goddamn.
Yeah, seeing the "happen to anyone" hate posts triggered me. Maybe some wisdom of age or something, but these horror stories pop up nearly every summer.
That article is heart wrenching.
UberTag
Member
It's also illegal in 19 states including hotbeds like California, Nevada, Texas and Florida.
Apparently those states haven't read the Washington Post.
srsly? just in the last page:
learn introspection and "when not to post".
we should know by now that legislation isn't based on fact, but on emotion.
There's actually a pretty simple fix in the form of a weight sensor on the seat that goes off if you turn off the car. Car companies don't want to spend the money on it, and Congress won't mandate it, and -- because people all believe it could never happen to them -- most of the aftermarket makers haven't been able to make it turn a profit.
There are new products trying all the time, including stuff that is built into the baby seat, that notifies your phone if you walk off without the baby. But it doesn't happen often, and parents think it could never happen to them, so buying them isn't very common.
Are you seriously comparing a baby or child to a fucking TV remote? Please tell me you're trolling here.
Kuroi Gogeta
Member
That second article that someone posted needs to be edited into the OP. A lot of people are coming in here with the gut reaction of "How stupid must you be to forget your child is inside a hot-ass car?" It's deeper than that. It really can and has happened to all sorts of people. I came in here thinking "WTF it's not an accident if you leave your kid in a car" before I read the article.
You're missing his point. The point is that certain things become routine to the point where you're not actively assigning importance and thinking "well its no big deal if I forget this or that thing, let me focus more on getting this right". It goes beyond the realm of simple "you either know what you're doing or not" and crosses over into brain science
You're missing his point. The point is that certain things become routine to the point where you're not actively assigning importance and thinking "well its no big deal if I forget this or that thing, let me focus more on getting this right". It goes beyond the realm of simple "you either know what you're doing or not" and crosses over into brain science
If you know you are fucked up atm, and have an infant, check check and be careful and then check again (then repeat). If you are so stressed out for getting the good wine you need for the dinner and get the food from the mall that you forget the most precious thing you have... then you are partly guilty. You did not do it with intend and it was under special circumstances, but for me it's not an accident.
When i put my kid into the car a month ago, there was a diaper bag in the back. Thought about going to the trash can which was 10 meters away but then i didn't because i didn't want to let it sit there alone, even for 2 minutes. 100.000 times it works and 100.001 one something stupid happens (like she finds a littel piece of platic in the car and swallows it)...
For a parent, forgetting your child or leaving your child alone inside a car for 2 hours is not fucking routine.
Jesus fucking christ.
You're missing the point again. Its not that leaving your child for 2 hours is routine, its because of your routines that you can accidentally fault-positive on a automatic mental checkmark that causes someone one to leave a child alone.
When you have a child, that child becomes an extension of you. You don't just leave your infant in a bathtub to go watch Game of Thrones because it was part of your routine.
Please stop. How anyone can defend this makes my head hurt.
*cough*
edit: Its not about "defending" it. Its about accepting that its a tragedy and something that has an honest to goodness neurological explanation to it.
second edit: A response to common comments that you see in this thread was done by the same author as that piece.
https://www.bundoo.com/community-blog/dr-sara-responds-to-reader-comments-on-forgotten-baby-syndrome/
PeakPointMatrix
Member
Again, missing the point. This isn't a deliberate decision these people are making. The brain following a routine overlooks the a particular constant, thus forgetting they had a child in the car. Why are the lot of you convinced that these parents specifically thought, "I'll only be a minute! Stay here jr!" "Oopsie I killed him!"
What a trainwreck embarrassment of a thread this is:
Leaving your infant in a car alone for 2 hours (not 5 minutes, not 10 minutes, not 30 minutes but two whole hours) is negligence. Comparing a child to a TV remote is mind boggling.
A few years ago me and a buddy were walking to the store when we heard a baby crying somewhere in a car, we tried to locate the car and we did, door was locked. I was about to break the window when the mother came running all hysterical when she realised she forgotten her baby. She thanked us for trying to help, i didnt say anything, inside i was fucking furious.
This was during a really warm summer.
This was during a really warm summer.
PeakPointMatrix
Member
Oh my god
It's not EQUATING your child to a TV remote.
It's the brain pattern/lapse that occurs when your brain forgets ANYTHING *is what is the same*, whether it be a remote, a diamond ring, a birthday, meeting up with a friend... literally *anything*. The lapse that occurs in your brain is indiscriminate to whatever it is, big, small, alive, or not. Because the brain is a complex, falliable part of our body, these things simply happen. They are indeed accidents.
Enter The 36 Chambers
Member
Poor kid man god damn.
Smh at all these holier than thou judgemental parents itt. We get it, it totally wouldn't happen to you, their kid just died. Show some fucking class and get off your high horses.
Smh at all these holier than thou judgemental parents itt. We get it, it totally wouldn't happen to you, their kid just died. Show some fucking class and get off your high horses.
Grizzlyjin
Supersonic, idiotic, disconnecting, not respecting, who would really ever wanna go and top that
Are you actually reading what people are posting or just lashing out? It's a tragedy but that's exactly how it works. Same mechanism. Your personal feelings don't factor into your brain automatically going through the motions.
This isn't my personal opinion of what I think happened...its been studied by doctors extensively...babies are especially at risk because you don't hold a conversation with a baby in the car. You focus on traffic, on what you have to do later on today, on what you need to pick up, and nothing triggers that response that the baby is in the backseat.
Kuroi Gogeta
Member
Man, you're completely ignoring the science people are posting here. People aren't saying people who end up in this situation just don't care enough about their kid that they forget. There is something that happens in the human brain that causes this to happen. I strongly suggest you read the washington post article
This isn't "oh some idiot that doesn't love their kid enough left them out to die because they're stupid" there is more to it than that, and you're actively refusing to see it. None of the people who lost their kids were like "eh whoops" it destroyed them and they live in pain every day of their lives.
I think my reaction is based on my own upbringing where my mother would always keep me in her sight when going anywhere. We never had a situation where we'd be out and about and she'd forget about me for 5 minutes let alone a whole 2 hours which seems like an eternity to me when you're out with your infant. I can understand having a brain lapse where you'd forget for a brief moment in time but like I said, 2 hours would feel like an eternity for a parent with a child outside their home, no?
It makes me angry that this can happen. Poor kid.
Are you actively ignoring the articles being posted to try and explain the situation from a medical and scientific perspective?
Its a known danger for many years that can be avoided by simply making a routine of checking the backseat every time, as suggested in the article. At what point is that going to stop being too much to ask?
No, I'm just explaining my reaction to the news in the OP, not the neurological/psychological explanation. I've read that now.
PeakPointMatrix
Member
Good. I hope it has opened a more scientifically grounded understanding as to why this could happen to literally anyone in the world, from the most to least educated, wealthy, young, old or race. The rest of you condemning the parents (it seriously couldn't be easier to spot those who don't have kids) should do the same and read the literature provided by posters here.
Nobody (at least from what i can see here) is saying that. You can still actively try to minimize the already low probability of the FBS happening.
Edit: Damn Praxis, don't prove me wrong with the next post.
| Praxis |
Banned
I can't even fathom how bad a parent you must be to do this. Fucking stupid cunts, makes me sick.
Edit: This was my knee jerk reaction after reading the op, reading the subsequent replies makes it a bit more understandable, barely.
Edit: This was my knee jerk reaction after reading the op, reading the subsequent replies makes it a bit more understandable, barely.
KernelPanic
Member
I'm so paranoid about this that I check my car seat every time regardless.
Have more "accidents" checking an empty seat but that's how I want it.
Have more "accidents" checking an empty seat but that's how I want it.
Baraka in the White House
2-Terms of Kombat
It really is eye-opening. The truth is most people make simple mistakes every single day. Most of the time we're just fortunate that those mistakes don't result in horrific consequences.
Most of the time...
Perhaps you could read the article linked several times throughout this thread.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/life...2be35962a52_story.html?utm_term=.21b7bec20437
chromatic9
Member
I can understand a change of routine or exhaustion.
One case in that article a person drove home, went to bed and left the baby in the driveway.
Another one, business man, baby left in the car park and the alarm went off three times but each time he just reset the alarm, just completely forgot he had the kid and was supposed to drop the kid off on the way. Odd routines and having most of your life getting out of the car alone.
One case in that article a person drove home, went to bed and left the baby in the driveway.
Another one, business man, baby left in the car park and the alarm went off three times but each time he just reset the alarm, just completely forgot he had the kid and was supposed to drop the kid off on the way. Odd routines and having most of your life getting out of the car alone.
A lot of these stories that I've read have ridiculous circumstances. Like leaving the kid in a car and playing Pachinko.
But its the same thing right? Brain can't help it. What if a teacher or bus driver left your kid in a hot bus?
I get why people are angry. We keep getting these stories every year(they seem to only happen in the summer for some reason) and you would think people would be extra careful.
My sister in law would freak out when my brother took their baby outside without a hat to protect his eyes. Kids are weak to the heat.
ElectricBlanketFire
Member
You took nothing away from the article.
Yeah, I read the other one that was posted that was basically 'your brain will fuck you, but making a habbit of checking your car could save your kids life'.
I might read the longer article later.
Gravy Boat
Member
Telling people not to forget something doesn't actually help them remember it.
I've never forgotten my child anywhere, but I've had similar moments. Like a few weeks ago my parents took her for the evening, I still went up to her room to check on her and freaked out a bit when she wasn't in her bed before I remembered where she was.
I think the parents are still at fault, but I think alot of people aren't being fair. I wouldn't say this is an easy thing to forget, but it can happen and it's unfortunate, but it's not a sign of negligence.
LegendofJoe
Member
My wife and I discussed this over the weekend. I told her that if I ever did something like this I would end my life. My self-hate would be too much to overcome. It is definitely one of my worst nightmares.
Dreams-Visions
Member
Yea...thread when exactly how I expected it would. Accepting research is a bridge too far for some. Easier to just say fuck the parents who are grieving a lost child. Right?
Some of you can and need to do better than this.
Some of you can and need to do better than this.
Shao Kahn on the Lawn
Member
Those of you who are convinced that it could not ever possibly happen to you are probably more likely to endure it because it's not something you're willing to account for in terms of proactive preparation. You may think that you're somehow immune to the same failings that lead to these outcomes but you're not.
Sleep deprivation + Routine Change = Disaster.
Sleep deprivation + Routine Change = Disaster.
Holy hell, our kid is 8 months old right now and I couldn't finish half of that article without tearing up.
AtomskEater
Member
That's terrifying. I'm the type of person that forgets things all the time, so when/if I have kids I'd definitely needs to institute a policy to check the backseat every time I get out, whether I think I have my kid that day or not. Every time. Although the article mentions forgetful and organized people are both capable of this, I wouldn't want to take that risk.
It's also frustrating that there's no incentive for car companies to make weight detection alarms standard. Wonder how many of those cars that make a big deal of their safety features (specifically to protect your kids and loved ones) have something like this?