This.
Also everything had to be her way, she was insanely spoiled growing up.
And apparently one guy wasn't enough to satisfy her.
-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Things you can't stand about your Significant Other
- Thread starter K' Dash
- Start date
- Status
This.
Also everything had to be her way, she was insanely spoiled growing up.
And apparently one guy wasn't enough to satisfy her.
goldenpp72
Member
She isn't naked all the time
MetalGuardian
Banned
I absolutely love my girlfriend, and fortunately we are so compatible that we rarely run into any issues. Sure, I wish she wouldn't listen to shitty radio stations when we're driving (especially since she has great taste in music and acknowledges most mainstream pop bands are shit, she just enjoys the catchy hooks and choruses), and I wish she wasn't so busy during the school year, but those are so far removed from legitimate relationship "problems" that I can't complain.
In fact last month the thing we argued over the most was probably video games, specifically me not wanting to play them as often as she would like. She LOVES watching me play video games. Sometimes when I don't feel like it she'll bribe me.
"Will you PLEASE play Mario Kart for me? I'll rub your back and shoulders for you while you play!"
So yeah, I have a most excellent set up going on. And it's all thanks to GAF's very own girl-age thread!
In fact last month the thing we argued over the most was probably video games, specifically me not wanting to play them as often as she would like. She LOVES watching me play video games. Sometimes when I don't feel like it she'll bribe me.
"Will you PLEASE play Mario Kart for me? I'll rub your back and shoulders for you while you play!"
So yeah, I have a most excellent set up going on. And it's all thanks to GAF's very own girl-age thread!
Foxy Fox 39
Banned
I sometimes feel like my wife thinks things will just magically happen.
Here's an example: We jointly run a video production company, but my wife clocks in maybe an average of 10 hours a week on it while I'm doing roughly 40-50 hours a week worth of work (we also work other full time jobs). For instance, we have a film that we're releasing late Feb that is VERY visual FX heavy. It took me roughly 12 hours or so to do a single sequence because of the amount of compositing I needed to do. I still have hundreds of hours worth of work left. After I do this, I have to do the coloring, then go to our sound engineer for scoring and ADR. My wife, on the other hand, only has a small sequence to do. It is the most intense VFX sequence in the film and it's going to require 40-50 hours of work to finish, but she has yet to sit down and start. She comes up with every excuse in the book and then sits on the couch and watches movies she's seen a hundred times before. It's kind of annoying because she held up our last film by two weeks since she refused to sit her ass down at the computer and power through all of the FX we had to do. I could actually go on about stuff related to our business.
I guess I will... (wow, this has kind of been bothering me)
For our business, we both need to be actively getting clientele, promoting, etc. She rarely ever does anything promotion wise via our accounts or even her personal account. It's like she thinks clients will just manifest out of thin air. It drives me INSANE.
Also, because we usually, at most, have a 10 person crew, it would be awesome if she grabbed our video cameras and started shooting things to work on for template work and/or just practice. She refuses to do this. She waits until we have a project to do anything... which sometimes is a month apart. So she waits a literal month doing nothing. This entire time I'm shooting things, I'm experimenting in our programs, I'm trying to come up with templates, I'm trying to get a good portfolio.
ARGH!
Thanks, guys... I needed this thread. I just feel like I'm working myself to the bone and she's just benefiting from how much of my ass I'm busting.
Here's an example: We jointly run a video production company, but my wife clocks in maybe an average of 10 hours a week on it while I'm doing roughly 40-50 hours a week worth of work (we also work other full time jobs). For instance, we have a film that we're releasing late Feb that is VERY visual FX heavy. It took me roughly 12 hours or so to do a single sequence because of the amount of compositing I needed to do. I still have hundreds of hours worth of work left. After I do this, I have to do the coloring, then go to our sound engineer for scoring and ADR. My wife, on the other hand, only has a small sequence to do. It is the most intense VFX sequence in the film and it's going to require 40-50 hours of work to finish, but she has yet to sit down and start. She comes up with every excuse in the book and then sits on the couch and watches movies she's seen a hundred times before. It's kind of annoying because she held up our last film by two weeks since she refused to sit her ass down at the computer and power through all of the FX we had to do. I could actually go on about stuff related to our business.
I guess I will... (wow, this has kind of been bothering me)
For our business, we both need to be actively getting clientele, promoting, etc. She rarely ever does anything promotion wise via our accounts or even her personal account. It's like she thinks clients will just manifest out of thin air. It drives me INSANE.
Also, because we usually, at most, have a 10 person crew, it would be awesome if she grabbed our video cameras and started shooting things to work on for template work and/or just practice. She refuses to do this. She waits until we have a project to do anything... which sometimes is a month apart. So she waits a literal month doing nothing. This entire time I'm shooting things, I'm experimenting in our programs, I'm trying to come up with templates, I'm trying to get a good portfolio.
ARGH!
Thanks, guys... I needed this thread. I just feel like I'm working myself to the bone and she's just benefiting from how much of my ass I'm busting.
Lamel
Banned
Fire her.
goldenpp72
Member
Being honest though, i'd say her biggest flaw for me is lack of motivation, she has no passion or fire to aspire for much, career, and basically anything. She's a sweetheart but possibly the laziest person I've ever known.
Sounds toxic. You should talk to her about this stuff before you grow to hate her over it.
Risky.
Try a calm venting of your feelings, and get her to open up about why she isn't motivated.
Maybe your wife is not an empire-builder who wants the second full time job, she's just afraid to say so because she knows you have a dream of making this into your main gig.
If that doesn't work then fire her. Prepare for Armageddon though.
Also, check your pms when you can Alf. Book question.
I made this thread for that, to vent about that shit, is not that I don't love her, I just can't stand some shit she does, I'm not trying to change her, that's how she is, but yeah she push my buttons from time to time.
mickcenary
Member
That's pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty disgusting. Does he not get bored? I can do this maybe once a week, if that. Sleeping is glorious, but for that long...
Anyway, back on topic: looking back on it, I found myself cringing on the inside whenever my ex-girlfriend would talk in a social setting and I hardly even know why. I just felt really conscious of what she was saying, how my friends would react; things like that. She was a lovely girl, but for some reason, I always felt as if she was constantly teetering on conversational "dagginess".
So, yeah, it's probably something to do with me more than anyone else.
This. She does help me clean here and there but honestly, she can turn the place into a disaster zone over night. And she keeps everything to boot. Not that she remembers, I've thrown shit out and she's none the wiser lol
I'm okay with that though, she does work full-time as a RN so between the two of us we make great money. So if the place has to go to hell, meh.
You'd be surprised how many times that has happened to me in relationships.
I wonder if women are conditioned to feel like they are allowed to be non-contibuting to the relationship, since it has happened to me often.
Lamel
Banned
Oh God, I was just joking. DO NOT FIRE YOUR WIFE. but do talk to her about it, it is a serious issue.
that's a bit fucked up to say. many guys mooch off their girls too. You've just been unlucky.
goldenpp72
Member
Nothing against you, but I wonder if she married you and has a desire to "fix" you. Like redeem you or correct your habits.
I'm always curious about things like that.
So you're wife is perfect? Sounds like an early marriage. No one is perfect and holding her up as such will only lead to disappointment over time.
I've talked to her a couple times about it and what it seems like is that the only time she has major initiative is when we are nearing the end of a project or the deadline is literally right in front of her face. When it comes to this, she becomes a procrastinator of the WORST kind. What drives me nuts is that she does AWESOME work when she does it... I mean mind blowing stuff for someone who has only really had their hands on these programs for a little more than a year. I mean, she never did the actual film editing before and she helped me put together a full length in under three weeks while teaching herself a slew of programs at the exact same time. But, again, that's when the deadline is right in front of her face and she's highly stressed out about getting it done... then she can push out great work, but everything else in our relationship suffers because of it.
I do want to make it clear that this is literally the only issue I have with my wife. For every other issue I may have, I can point to something I do where I'm not upholding my end of the bargain (she does dishes, I do laundry, some weeks neither get done for awhile, etc). Every other part of our relationship is storybook/how the fuck did I get this lucky?
Pretty much he stays awake until around 5 AM playing video games. I've raised it with him before but he just says he has insomnia and there's nothing he can do about it. I occasionally wonder if he sleeps so much so he doesn't have to talk to me. >_>;
I've had a boyfriend like your ex girlfriend too, with the whole praying they won't say something stupid every time you hang out with them in a group. Hahaha. Was she into really different stuff to your group?
When I think about it, there isn't too much actually. She's one of those girls who watches Jersey Shore and Teen Mom, but I can't complain because she sits and watches WWE RAW with me occasionally. One example is when The Rock came back on Valentines Day last year, I was actually quite surprised she sat there watching it with me.
Something more serious though is that she can be a huge bitch at times. What's funny is that she acknowledges it, too. I can ask her a simple question and she answers in the rudest tone.
It's not as bad as it may sound but it does get annoying every now and then.
Something more serious though is that she can be a huge bitch at times. What's funny is that she acknowledges it, too. I can ask her a simple question and she answers in the rudest tone.
It's not as bad as it may sound but it does get annoying every now and then.
SlipperySlope
Banned
That she doesn't like me.
Unhandled Exception
Member
Fuckin' this. She also drinks so loudly that I've commonly mistaken the noise for the sound of one of our dogs puking.
Unhandled Exception
Member
Sounds like bullshit to me. I've had similar issues I've had to grow out of, and they were a sore spot on the relationship for awhile. I just never realized that I wasn't fully adjusting my lifestyle to fit within a relationship, and that it wasn't fair of me. Problem fixed after that realization.. one less thing to throw in my face during fights. Win/win.
The Shadow
Member
Same. We laugh at our own geeky Futurama and Monty Python reference jokes. She has a libido that matches my own (for once), and the best thing is that she loves road trips as much as I do.
The worst is not so much her but the influences around her and what they say. Someone that has her ear told her that I'm too good for her and that she needed to watch me or I'd stray and/or break up with her. Since it's family, it's not like I can just chase them off either. Lame.
PhoncipleBone
Banned
The fact that she hits the snooze alarm for an hour or more every day. If she gets up. She is not on a rigid schedule at work (university research), but the first alarm wakes me up and keeps me up. The constant snooze alarms drive me up the wall.
she does no drugs whatsoever, doesn't even drink.
There's nothing wrong with that, but WHY. It's not like she's tried them, and didn't like them. It's not like they ruined her life and she has to stay clean. She's never even tried them... I try to convince her that she'd have a lot of fun, and that she should at least see what its like, but she refuses... I mean, nothing wrong with that, but I'd really rather be with someone with a more liberal policy :/
overall she's great though.
There's nothing wrong with that, but WHY. It's not like she's tried them, and didn't like them. It's not like they ruined her life and she has to stay clean. She's never even tried them... I try to convince her that she'd have a lot of fun, and that she should at least see what its like, but she refuses... I mean, nothing wrong with that, but I'd really rather be with someone with a more liberal policy :/
overall she's great though.
brucewaynegretzky
Member
Really? REALLY?! Can't respect a choice like that and argue with her over it? Seems dumb. I didn't for a LONG time. I wasn't really messing out on anything and there were legitimate reasons for not doing it. She doesn't sound like she's preachy, so who gives a shit? If that's something that's bugging you I think the problem is you not her.
MrOogieBoogie
BioShock Infinite is like playing some homeless guy's vivid imagination
Sorry, but this thread only makes me glad I'm not in a relationship. I couldn't take half the shit you guys do from other people on a daily basis. Yeah, yeah, the good outweighs the bad--I get that--but some of this shit is terrifying.
well we don't actually ARGUE over it, I try to convince her, she says she's not interested, end of story.
Again I don't think there's anything wrong with the decision. I dont think any less of her for it. I just would have more fun if she was willing to do it with me, and there's nothing wrong with a little booze and weed sometimes.
And yeah, I'd agree with you the problem is me and not her.
My girl sometimes goes into what my friends call "actually mexican" mode. She is a much better spanish speaker than I am since she actually goes back to visit family whereas I detest even crossing the border. She'll randomly switch into spanish while texting me and talking to me and it catches me off guard since i can't keep up with her. She uses tons of crazy phrases around me that I have to give her a dumbfounded look since I have no idea what she says. But what irks is is the usage of jajaja instead of ha in her texts.
Unhandled Exception
Member
I'm in the same boat as her, never touched any of it. Been with a few women who tried to pressure me into it and it ended very poorly. I was never preachy about it, I frankly didn't and still don't give a fuck if the person I'm seeing indulges. Don't want to over step but if this is something that annoys you about her I wouldn't count on it lasting.
DJ_Lae
Member
She has a tendency to go from arguing to just giving me the silent treatment for a couple of hours, which is annoying as I'd rather just hash out whatever the disagreement is and then have make-up sex. Instead I just have to go off and do something else while I wait for her to regain her senses.
Also, no anal.
Also, no anal.
I can get that, but sometimes you need to make a move before her.
Also, I don't get how guys can be into anal, firstly I feel like i'm hurting the person I love, and secondly, it's kinda nasty. It's like scientifically retarded, there's a perfectly great hole right next to it.
Dark Octave
Banned
The wife is pretty great. No emotional/mood issues like most women. She's just forgetful and a messy eater. Sometimes it really gets on my nerves but I'll happily take that any day.
I also have three female friends who are always hot for other people other than their husbands. Getting all hot and bothered over some ugly ass pale guy in a movie or a boxer who's eyes have been crushed in over the years of beatings, while your husband is siting right next to you. How disrespectful is that?
I'm grateful.
I also have three female friends who are always hot for other people other than their husbands. Getting all hot and bothered over some ugly ass pale guy in a movie or a boxer who's eyes have been crushed in over the years of beatings, while your husband is siting right next to you. How disrespectful is that?
I'm grateful.
Petit Melon
Member
His lack of motivation. He's a good talker, but not a walker. If I try to tell him to do something, he yells at me and starts belittling me instead because he can't handle criticism. I end up not saying anything now, and refocus my energy on something positive instead of something useless.
His mother is an insane housewife and refuses to divorce his dad, so I get to hear hours of insane crackpot theories like the most recent - "A voodoo queen put a spell on him and now he's out having secret gay orgies." I wish I was making that up, I really do. She even installed a GPS in both his car and his work vehicle (company truck) And she has this weird fixation on me not being "blood" but if I were "blood" that would be reallllly creepy. He screams at me if I don't spend time with his family, but every time I go there they treat me like shit (his mom threatens to call the police on me for trespassing into her home all the time because I don't agree with everything she says and of course, I'm not Catholic) The main reason I keep pushing off marriage is because I would be marrying into his family. I can't be chill with them at all, which is really offsetting for me because it's not me. I know I could never convince him to move far away enough that I would only see them once or twice every couple of years though. :/
Well, that's a load off my chest. Phew.
His mother is an insane housewife and refuses to divorce his dad, so I get to hear hours of insane crackpot theories like the most recent - "A voodoo queen put a spell on him and now he's out having secret gay orgies." I wish I was making that up, I really do. She even installed a GPS in both his car and his work vehicle (company truck) And she has this weird fixation on me not being "blood" but if I were "blood" that would be reallllly creepy. He screams at me if I don't spend time with his family, but every time I go there they treat me like shit (his mom threatens to call the police on me for trespassing into her home all the time because I don't agree with everything she says and of course, I'm not Catholic) The main reason I keep pushing off marriage is because I would be marrying into his family. I can't be chill with them at all, which is really offsetting for me because it's not me. I know I could never convince him to move far away enough that I would only see them once or twice every couple of years though. :/
Well, that's a load off my chest. Phew.
It's the opposite for me. I can't stand chicks that constantly want to make me try shit that I've repeatedly refused.
wut
Yeah, that sure sounds like a relationship you'd like to keep up.
You need to get far, far away from that family and him.
You're already unhappy, why torture yourself? Life's too short for that. Especially when they will never, ever change, so this is going to be the status quo for the rest of your life.
Unhandled Exception
Member
Christ, exit stage left.
Silicon Knight
Member
The only thing I can really think of, is that she is very introverted and I'm a text book extravert persoon. She hides her feelings most of the time unless I ask her about them en she ALWAYS needs time to think about things. That makes it a little hard to do spontaneous things, which I love to do. Also, arguments are a problem in that I love to argue every once in a while to clear the air.
For example; I told her how nice it would be for the two of us to go on a city trip next month from now when she graduates. That suggestion alone almost gave her a heart attack because she feels like 'she doesn't have the time to plan.' Come on, let loose a little.
Othet than that, she is the love of my life and EVERYTHING I want in a woman. She's mighty smart, insanely beautiful, has some funny quirky things, a great sense of humor and has great fashion sense. In that light, her 'deficiencies' are very, very minor.
For example; I told her how nice it would be for the two of us to go on a city trip next month from now when she graduates. That suggestion alone almost gave her a heart attack because she feels like 'she doesn't have the time to plan.' Come on, let loose a little.
Othet than that, she is the love of my life and EVERYTHING I want in a woman. She's mighty smart, insanely beautiful, has some funny quirky things, a great sense of humor and has great fashion sense. In that light, her 'deficiencies' are very, very minor.
Leave him.
Dr_Boris_Goltz
Banned
I don't like when she drinks even though she just gets kind of loud and talkative.
It's sorta annoying but nothing I can't tolerate.
Also she made me watch Grandma's Boy and fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck that movie.
It's sorta annoying but nothing I can't tolerate.
Also she made me watch Grandma's Boy and fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck that movie.
PumpkinPie
Banned
My ex had severe only child syndrome, totally spoiled, loved the drama and if she didn't get her own way she just didn't speak to me. We once went to see a band and I caught a plectrum the guitarist threw, she didn't talk to me for a week because I got it instead of her. Seriously.
It finally ended when we were arguing on the phone and I hung up (I hate arguing, I'm too chilled out for it), she texted me saying "phone me back or we're finished", I saw her once to get my stuff back after that. Called that bitch's bluff.
It finally ended when we were arguing on the phone and I hung up (I hate arguing, I'm too chilled out for it), she texted me saying "phone me back or we're finished", I saw her once to get my stuff back after that. Called that bitch's bluff.
- Status