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[SmokyDave]

She thinks carefully before she speaks which can be a godsend but it can also be exquisitely frustrating if I'm waiting hours for her to finish a sentence.

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

She doesn't even take a passing interest in some things that I'm passionate about. I really enjoy her perspective on everything so if I'm balls-deep in The Wire, it's her I want to discuss it with more than anyone else. I can see how that goes both ways between us though. I'm just being arrogant suggesting the things I care about should somehow matter 'more'. Maybe that's me being a dick, rather than her.

She can't appreciate the musical genius that was Don Van Vliet.

She's an attractive, intelligent & funny woman and yet she insists on choosing a belligerent drunken fascist for a boyfriend. I guess I benefit from that one though.

All things considered, I sure do love my lady.

 

[noah111]

My ex had severe only child syndrome, totally spoiled, loved the drama and if she didn't get her own way she just didn't speak to me. We once went to see a band and I caught a plectrum the guitarist threw, she didn't talk to me for a week because I got it instead of her. Seriously.

It finally ended when we were arguing on the phone and I hung up (I hate arguing, I'm too chilled out for it), she texted me saying "phone me back or we're finished", I saw her once to get my stuff back after that. Called that bitch's bluff.

That's fucking insanity. Can't believe there are adults like this. As a young teen and even now I vowed to myself to always be open minded in relationships and try not to argue, cause meaningless conflict etc.

But man if I ever dated someone like that I'd either have to laugh in their face until they got over it or just move straight on.

 

[Red]

She takes forever to pick what she wants when we go out to eat.

When she vacuums and something is out of the way, she will pick it up and then put it back down so the vacuum can get it.

 

[Gaaraz]

Complains our house is too big to maintain and she doesn't have time to get anything done. Somehow this translates into nothing getting done. She doesn't work (mutual choice,raising the kids) and can't find 30 minutes to clean?

Claims laundry is a big task. How much time does it take to put a load in and transfer the other the the dryer?

At least 3 out of 5 work days a week I call on my way home and get 'Sorry I haven't even thought about dinner yet?'

What are you doing all day? LOL

Damn, I'd find this infuriating! My girlfriend does say some of these things at times (the house is too big, argh! the ironing!) but it's pretty justified considering we work similar hours and since I do some freelance at home from work she'll do a lot more around the house. But if she didn't work? Jeez!

 

[Zaptruder]

She thinks carefully before she speaks which can be a godsend but it can also be exquisitely frustrating if I'm waiting hours for her to finish a sentence.

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

She doesn't even take a passing interest in some things that I'm passionate about. I really enjoy her perspective on everything so if I'm balls-deep in The Wire, it's her I want to discuss it with more than anyone else. I can see how that goes both ways between us though. I'm just being arrogant suggesting the things I care about should somehow matter 'more'. Maybe that's me being a dick, rather than her.

She can't appreciate the musical genius that was Don Van Vliet.

She's an attractive, intelligent & funny woman and yet she insists on choosing a belligerent drunken fascist for a boyfriend. I guess I benefit from that one though.

All things considered, I sure do love my lady.

Goddamn Stealth braggers. Come into threads where other people are sharing and commiserating their miseries and shit all over it with a "my relationship is so goddamn awesome" post.

 

[TheApatheticOne]

- she has a ridiculously good memory and can get frustrated when mine doesn't keep up. No, I'm probably not going to remember the names of your coworkers no matter how many times you talk about them.

This was a HUGE one in my last relationship. Her memory is one of the best that I have ever been witness too. Huge things, small things, didnt matter... remembered every single thing, forgot nothing. My memory, not so much. I blame my extreme apathy towards things I dont care about, which covers a lot of ground.

She always got extremely irritated when I couldnt remember names, places, or details of previous events. What made it worse is when she would want details of previous relationships, details I honestly didnt remember, so I would just make something harmless up for the sake of moving the conversation along. Then months later, if it came up again, and I still couldnt remember, and then what I made up at that point didnt match what I made up prior.... off we go! lol

 

[Numpt3]

Indecisive. About everything.

"Should I pick up more hours at work?"

"Should I wear my hair like this?"

"Should I take a nap before we go out?"

Good god, this.

Also she's the messiest person I have ever met, leaves stuff everywhere... But she's one in a million really.

 

[FrontalMonk]

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

She doesn't even take a passing interest in some things that I'm passionate about. I really enjoy her perspective on everything so if I'm balls-deep in The Wire, it's her I want to discuss it with more than anyone else. I can see how that goes both ways between us though. I'm just being arrogant suggesting the things I care about should somehow matter 'more'. Maybe that's me being a dick, rather than her.

Both of these, definitely. It really irritates me when it comes to stuff like how she hates her job, but she doesn't want me to help her find a new one or anything, she just wants to vent about the day. It's frustrating because I want to help her, motivate her, do _something_, and pretty much all I get to do is listen to her bitch about how much her boss sucks, and how she wants a new job and has been "looking" for years.

 

[orion434]

My wife burps like a man and does so in public, it was funny the first couple of times... but when we're out and she lets one go I get the stare-of-death from others.

 

[Menelaus]

Wife will always leave the cupboard doors open after getting an item. After a while, 4 random doors are open, and I just raaaaaaaaage.

 

[Arcane Hayter]

Drinking too much and being mean.

I know that feel...

 

[BankaiZaraki]

Her previous life before me, she gets super clingy to me if I'm gone more than 10 minutes(number one thing I hate most about her)

 

[K' Dash]

My wife burps like a man and does so in public, it was funny the first couple of times... but when we're out and she lets one go I get the stare-of-death from others.

Man I laughed more than I should, it reminded me of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQbF1mxYEVY

lol

 

[BankaiZaraki]

Wife will always leave the cupboard doors open after getting an item. After a while, 4 random doors are open, and I just raaaaaaaaage.

hahaha I do this ALL the time.

 

[bengraven]

- her anxiety makes every minor trouble 10x more difficult

- her smoking that she refuses to stop regardless of how broke we are and how everyone else, including her formerly chain-smoking parents have quit

- she doesn't want to make friends with normal people - she invites white trash and creepy religious people over

- she lets her family, including our son, walk over her despite my angry interjections to which I'm told to "shut up, it's okay".

- she might seriously leave me if she knew that I was an atheist - when I met her I was a Christian and she said "if you want to be with me, you will believe in what I do" and so out of fear I remained Christian for two years...but the last few years I just can't do it anymore. Now she's like "pray for me, my back hurts" and I'm like "mkay".

- her libido is mostly gone, but that's the fault of the cysts and her anxiety

- she gets pissed off when I fart, even and especially when it's an accident. Seriously, every time she hears a "poof" or even suspects I farted, it becomes a 5 minute argument. For the most part my wife is much cooler than the average chick, so it frustrates me that she finds this so fucking aggravating.

- she is fucking messy. She opens containers and leaves them open - the creamer on the countertop, a gallon of milk, bag of chips, etc and it's like she wants ME to put them away. And her clothes: every fucking surface of our room feels like it's covered in clothes. When she first stayed in my apartment years ago, that first night, within 30 MINUTES my floor was literally COVERED in her clothing. Our closet is almost a foot deep with clothes she tries on, then "eh" and throws down. Drives me fucking nuts. She has a smoking area on the porch and it's fucking disgusting and there's a literal flower pot full of empty butts. I chalk this all up to the fact that until she was age 8 her family was hoarding white trash until they inherited their millions and some common decency, but I need to break her of this.














But really, she's my soul mate and I don't think we'll ever be able to leave each other. I do love her more than any woman I've ever met.

Plus, she's a tiny cute chick who sexes up (occasionally) a 300+ pound man. My options would be shit if she left me, because I doubt there are non-bear chubby chasers anywhere around here.

And she's got a really really nice heart-shaped J.Lo ass.

 

[depths20XX]

She never makes decisions on anything that we do. It's always up to me. Whether it's where we go to eat, what movie we watch, what we do on the weekend. I've gotten used to it somewhat but it's really stressful to me sometimes. For once I'd like to just have her come up with an idea and all I have to do is agree with it. Doesn't help that I've never been much of the decision making type.

 

[Log4Girlz]

- her anxiety makes every minor trouble 10x more difficult

- her smoking that she refuses to stop regardless of how broke we are and how everyone else, including her formerly chain-smoking parents have quit

- she doesn't want to make friends with normal people - she invites white trash and creepy religious people over

- she lets her family, including our son, walk over her despite my angry interjections to which I'm told to "shut up, it's okay".

- she might seriously leave me if she knew that I was an atheist - when I met her I was a Christian and she said "if you want to be with me, you will believe in what I do" and so out of fear I remained Christian for two years...but the last few years I just can't do it anymore. Now she's like "pray for me, my back hurts" and I'm like "mkay".

- her libido is mostly gone, but that's the fault of the cysts and her anxiety

- she gets pissed off when I fart, even and especially when it's an accident. Seriously, every time she hears a "poof" or even suspects I farted, it becomes a 5 minute argument. For the most part my wife is much cooler than the average chick, so it frustrates me that she finds this so fucking aggravating.

- she is fucking messy. She opens containers and leaves them open - the creamer on the countertop, a gallon of milk, bag of chips, etc and it's like she wants ME to put them away. And her clothes: every fucking surface of our room feels like it's covered in clothes. When she first stayed in my apartment years ago, that first night, within 30 MINUTES my floor was literally COVERED in her clothing. Our closet is almost a foot deep with clothes she tries on, then "eh" and throws down. Drives me fucking nuts. She has a smoking area on the porch and it's fucking disgusting and there's a literal flower pot full of empty butts. I chalk this all up to the fact that until she was age 8 her family was hoarding white trash until they inherited their millions and some common decency, but I need to break her of this.














But really, she's my soul mate and I don't think we'll ever be able to leave each other. I do love her more than any woman I've ever met.

Plus, she's a tiny cute chick who sexes up (occasionally) a 300+ pound man. My options would be shit if she left me, because I doubt there are non-bear chubby chasers anywhere around here.

And she's got a really really nice heart-shaped J.Lo ass.

Umm...I was oddly saddened by this tale. I'm not sure what to say...I would have left her long ago, but that's me.

 

[Macattk15]

Her lack of motivation (mainly has to do with her schooling), her social anxiety, she is messier than me, her indecisiveness, her reliance on me doing/deciding everything.

But I still love her and wouldn't want to be with anyone else. There are several positives to all the negatives ... but this isn't the thread!

 

[depths20XX]

-long list of stuff

Man all the stuff doesn't make her seem very appealing. Good luck to you though

 

[kudos.]

She thinks carefully before she speaks which can be a godsend but it can also be exquisitely frustrating if I'm waiting hours for her to finish a sentence.

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

She doesn't even take a passing interest in some things that I'm passionate about. I really enjoy her perspective on everything so if I'm balls-deep in The Wire, it's her I want to discuss it with more than anyone else. I can see how that goes both ways between us though. I'm just being arrogant suggesting the things I care about should somehow matter 'more'. Maybe that's me being a dick, rather than her.

She can't appreciate the musical genius that was Don Van Vliet.

She's an attractive, intelligent & funny woman and yet she insists on choosing a belligerent drunken fascist for a boyfriend. I guess I benefit from that one though.

All things considered, I sure do love my lady.

What the fuck is this? My girl does this too. Do they not want things solved?

So aggravating.

 

[Chinner]

i dont have a so because i am a unlovable person.

 

[Log4Girlz]

i dont have a so because i am a unlovable person.

I was totally rooting for you to hook up with Robin William's daughter.

 

[Omegasquash]

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

It's a double edged sword, and one that many, many people have in common. We can't *solve* many issues, and often times, help isn't wanted or required...sometimes our others just want to vent a bit, and that's that. I am exactly the same way. Best advice I can give is just active listening...it goes a long way.

 

[The Interrobanger]

- Doesn't turn off lights when she leaves the house/room
- Used tissues everywhere.
- Makes a complete warzone of the kitchen/dishes when she cooks.
- Hogs the entire bed.
- I almost always go to bed later than her, so she makes me "tuck her in/cuddle" EVERY night. I could be in the middle of curing cancer and achieving world peace but she doesn't care, she'll still be mopey and whiney if I don't spend 10 mins cuddling her while she falls asleep.
- Is just all around messy. Dumps her clothes all over the house, leaves stinky yoga clothes in plastic bags in random locations, puts her purses/bags on every table/desk in every room instead of in the closet.

 

[Ecrofirt]

My wife doesn't bathe every day. Sometimes it's not even every other day. Fucking filthy. I don't know how the hell she got to be like that.

She also doesn't shave her legs often. I gagged earlier this week when I happened to see that her leg hair was as long as mine. WTF. Oh god, now I'm ill again.

She is also incredibly lazy, and would sleep all day if given the opportunity.

What the fuck did I get myself into?

 

[Log4Girlz]

My wife doesn't bathe every day. Sometimes it's not even every other day. Fucking filthy. I don't know how the hell she got to be like that.

She also doesn't shave her legs often. I gagged earlier this week when I happened to see that her leg hair was as long as mine. WTF. Oh god, now I'm ill again.

She is also incredibly lazy, and would sleep all day if given the opportunity.

What the fuck did I get myself into?

And you are with this beast because...?

 

[bengraven]

Umm...I was oddly saddened by this tale. I'm not sure what to say...I would have left her long ago, but that's me.

Man all the stuff doesn't make her seem very appealing. Good luck to you though

Don't feel bad for me; I was only venting.

She's 7 years younger than me. When I met her she had just turned 20 and was definitely a "trust fund college girl" while I was 27, from a lower class family and had been working my ass off since I was 16. She's 25 now and having a kid has forced her to grow up quite a bit and I still think we're working out the kinks.

I'll list some positives:

- fiercely loyal and forgiving. She takes her vows seriously, to the point that she doesn't believe in divorce. She believes that people divorce too easily these days and that thinking helps us resolve issues quickly

- she listens to problems and offers solutions

- an incredible mom, especially considering how unloving her mother is.

- was a stay at home mom for three years until I was unemployed and now has gone back to work for the first time since she was 18. She has been working her ass off, making great money in the year that I've been without work. She does this with few complaints.

- she may watch and read pure shit, but she's incredibly street smart and has common sense. She says I'm her cultural guru, but she's fairly open to most things.

- did I mention that she's really cute?

- beautiful singer; it puts a smile on my face to watch her cuddling with our son and singing softly to him.

- constantly concerned with me. She says she doesn't mind that I'm getting bigger, but she's always trying to get me to eat healthier and has mostly banned me from eating sugar to help me get to my target weight this year.



She's a fantastic woman and I probably don't deserve her. But we just need to work on her getting more independance and less anxiety.

 

[Chibrou]

And you are with this beast because...?

Boobs I guess.

 

[BaltimoreLarry]

How she's always divorcing me for no good reason.

 

[Log4Girlz]

Don't feel bad for me; I was only venting.

She's 7 years younger than me. When I met her she had just turned 20 and was definitely a "trust fund college girl" while I was 27, from a lower class family and had been working my ass off since I was 16. She's 25 now and having a kid has forced her to grow up quite a bit and I still think we're working out the kinks.

I'll list some positives:

- fiercely loyal and forgiving. She takes her vows seriously, to the point that she doesn't believe in divorce. She believes that people divorce too easily these days and that thinking helps us resolve issues quickly

- she listens to problems and offers solutions

- an incredible mom, especially considering how unloving her mother is.

- was a stay at home mom for three years until I was unemployed and now has gone back to work for the first time since she was 18. She has been working her ass off, making great money in the year that I've been without work. She does this with few complaints.

- she may watch and read pure shit, but she's incredibly street smart and has common sense. She says I'm her cultural guru, but she's fairly open to most things.

- did I mention that she's really cute?

- beautiful singer; it puts a smile on my face to watch her cuddling with our son and singing softly to him.

- constantly concerned with me. She says she doesn't mind that I'm getting bigger, but she's always trying to get me to eat healthier and has mostly banned me from eating sugar to help me get to my target weight this year.



She's a fantastic woman and I probably don't deserve her. But we just need to work on her getting more independance and less anxiety.

And work on a libido

 

[sixteen-bit]

That she doesn't like me.

End it then

 

[Fallout-NL]

But really, she's my soul mate and I don't think we'll ever be able to leave each other. I do love her more than any woman I've ever met.

Plus, she's a tiny cute chick who sexes up (occasionally) a 300+ pound man. My options would be shit if she left me, because I doubt there are non-bear chubby chasers anywhere around here.

And she's got a really really nice heart-shaped J.Lo ass.

Must be a great ass if it's enough compensation for the weird shit you put up with .

You're going to have to get her to quit smoking though. Bad for you, for her for your kid and it'll make her butt-ugly in 10 to 20 years. Have you seen what that does to your skin?

 

[radios shipping overview]

Glee.

 

[Sanky Panky]

I love my girl, but she can become capricious when drunk (I tell her all the time). There is some aggressiveness there that I know could come out at any given time.

When drunk, she smoked cigs (knowing I don't like it) but I brush it off, as it doesn't bother me unless she becomes a chain smoker.

 

[Kinitari]

Glee.

He knows how you feel

 

[dskillzhtown]

Umm...I was oddly saddened by this tale. I'm not sure what to say...I would have left her long ago, but that's me.

Same...but alot of that sounds like she is using the fact she is small and cute and he is 300+ pounds as a weapon and running all over him. That is completely a guess. But the truth is dude needs to put his foot down on some of that for two reasons. First, no woman likes a pushover, secondly no one can be truly happy with a woman acting like that.

Edit - saw bengraven's update, the situation seems better than the original description, but you two need to work on a few things (like in any relationship).

 

[Bad_Boy]

This thread makes me want to be single again. Ugh.

 

[alphaNoid]

Nothing against you, but I wonder if she married you and has a desire to "fix" you. Like redeem you or correct your habits.

I'm always curious about things like that.

Good point, but I can assure you thats not the case. Perhaps I was too hard on myself.. I tend to be. Compared to just about every one of my friends I have my shit together, and always have for years. However there are plenty of things I could improve with myself but I think the attraction my wife has to me is the gruff, non nonsense attitude and because I treat her with respect and love her to death. I am her man, she is my woman.. in a caveman sort of sense.

I"m not the type that needs fixing, I can say that confidently. But I am not without many faults.. if that makes sense?

So we need her to post in this thread I guess?

Touche!

I'm sure she would say things like me being a nagger, a clean freak, drinking too much wine, and playing a bit too much games instead of cuddling with her at night.

But probably mostly me just being an asshole most of the time. I'd argue she loves it though

Spoiler

this thread is humbling in a way, I should get her some flowers on my way home tonight

 

[windz]

What the fuck is this? My girl does this too. Do they not want things solved?

So aggravating.

+1! I have tried soooo many times to give her advice/guide her in the right direction and help her when dealing with problems but she much prefers to complain/bitch about it for a bit. Whether it be work or family related, she really doesn't stand up for herself or push herself to fix situations she hates. I really think there will be a breaking point though, where she just says "enough" and fixes some of the things I've been telling her to do for a while now. We shall see.

Also, her mom is a nutcase. Just completely batshit crazy. The things her mom says/the way her mom acts is completely baffling to me. It's like her mom has little to no logical thought in her head lol. I know her mom is the main reason for her indecisiveness/not wanting to stand up for herself, because after a lifetime of dealing with a controlling nutcase of a mom and a selfish douchebag of a brother, I can see how it would impact ones personality. I've even stepped in and called her brother on some of his bullshit and both her and her mom backed off for a while. They didn't want to talk to me for a few weeks, but then they started being more friendly and less asshole-ish...so that's good at least.

Really though, my problems are more with her family than her, and she is absolutely amazing to me. We get along great, have a TON in common, and are always laughing and having a good time. We love spending time with each other and really never get sick of each others company - we're just happy together and I must say I am very grateful for that. If we do fight, it's maybe once every few months, and there's no yelling or anything it's just debates on things like theology, but hey, nothing wrong with a good debate now and then. At the end of it, our opinions and beliefs remain the same - haha.

 

[alphaNoid]

Oh I just thought of something! My wife is kind of a messy person, in that she derobes and throws her clothing on the floor when she gets home. Gets a glass out of the cabinet, leaves the cabinet door open all day. Basically when I was a bachelor my place was axe murdering OCD clean and now with a wife and 2 year old my place is immaculate for no more than 4 hours at most.

I'm convinced if I keep being an asshole about it, she'll change. I refuse to accept the habbit of being a pig.

 

[FlyingTeacup]

This thread makes me want to be single again. Ugh.

i have never moved in with anyone. living together is very testing.

 

[Dark Octave]

Glee.

So glad my wife isn't into any of that bullshit and those vampire sex shows and movies. And whatever is trendy and autotuned on the radio. I had a co-worker like this and it drove me crazy sometimes.

So I'm greatful.

 

[Kosmo]

It's 1:30 and I just talk to my wife who is at home with our 5 and 3 year old.

Her: "What time are you getting out of there?"
Me: "I don't know, normal time, probably around 4."
Her: "OK, I was thinking of making chop suey, I might need you to pick up a few things."

My question: What is she doing between 1:30 and 4:30 when I will get home? Is it too much to put the kids in the car, drive 2 miles to the store and pickup what's needed for dinner?

Maddening.

 

[Clydefrog]

i dont have a so because i am a unlovable person.

together we are alone

 

[andycapps]

Spends too much time on Facebook. Tries to fill me in on details from friends or acquaintances, when I really don't care. Especially when hearing about details from someone's life that I met once 5 years ago. Speaks about them like they're on a first name basis and that I should remember them. Also, our movie and TV tastes are pretty different. Wife also tends to change clothes and leave the old ones on the floor. I try to put mine up constantly. Or at least for the most part. Her side of the room is typically a complete mess, and it eventually drives me crazy until she goes on a cleaning spree and everything is neat for a few days. These aren't really huge gripes, at all.

 

[ShockingAlberto]

What the fuck is this? My girl does this too. Do they not want things solved?

So aggravating.

Sometimes they just want you to tell them everything will be okay, not make everything okay like Superman.

 

[stuminus3]

My wife is passive-aggressive and I'm just plain aggressive-aggressive. She knows how to bring the rage out in me. At which point I've lost the argument. It's a volatile mix sometimes.

 

[Carlisle]

She doesn't necessarily want me to solve her problems, just to listen to them. I'm 'solution-focused' or some similar business-speak shit so that doesn't mesh well with me.

This took me a really really long time to get my head around with my fiancee, and was the cause of many fights early on. She has a problem and is sad, I want to fix and make her happy. Instead she gets pissed at me and we're fighting. At one point I just thought she was crazy.

Toughest lesson I've ever learned, but I get it now and it's actually a lot less work for me than what I was doing before. No more thinking of solutions and how to put them in place. Just hug and go about your business.