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90 Day Fiance is the greatest reality show of all time

I've been seeing all these clips of no neck Ed around and finally decided to take the plunge. This shit is too good. I'm going to watch the newest episode here in a few minutes so I'm a little behind.

Can't stand Stephanie - and I like her less after seeing some of the leaked nudes. Those are some deceptive tittays my friends. She is an expert titty presenter. They're not bad, they're just not as nice as they look clothed.

Ash is a complete scum bag and the fact that she is just figuring it out is hilarious to me. Also makes sense, she's one of those trendy west coast basic stoner chicks.

Varya seems like a pretty cool person, but Geoffrey seems like a future serial killer. Dude has those psycho eyes - he's a complete weirdo and you can see him constantly struggling to act normal.

Darcey and Diet Hugh Grant are both incredibly uninteresting.

David is sad, but moronic and reminds me of a story I was told years back when I was delivering pizza. I'll probably come back to this later. Yolanda is in the same sad moron category. What annoys me about her story line is you can tell they probably shot with her for a couple weeks and stretched a very small amount of content over an entire season.

Usman and old lady have been a pleasant surprise. Probably the most entertaining for me. No Neck comes close, but the constant cringe is incredible. The fact that Lisa treats him the way she does and he sticks with it is great. I respect his hustle, he's just trying to get over to the States and have a music career that flops.

BTW who's trying to throw down to get Usman to shout out GAF?
 

Grinchy

Banned
EverythingsOverrated EverythingsOverrated If you start with the earlier seasons, you'll even find some couples who have been in multiple seasons as they go through the K-1 process. If you watch all of Before the 90 Days season 4, I'd go all the way back and watch the earlier seasons of the shows first.

Before the 90 is always gonna be more crazy since there doesn't need to be any validity to the relationships yet whatsoever. It's just some idiot from America flying out to some shithole for their fuckpuppet. It is also a much better opportunity for the show to fake things and create scenarios that only come up more naturally on the regular show.

And yeah, I just can't even look at Darcey's face (or her sister's). They look like science experiments.
 
EverythingsOverrated EverythingsOverrated If you start with the earlier seasons, you'll even find some couples who have been in multiple seasons as they go through the K-1 process. If you watch all of Before the 90 Days season 4, I'd go all the way back and watch the earlier seasons of the shows first.

Before the 90 is always gonna be more crazy since there doesn't need to be any validity to the relationships yet whatsoever. It's just some idiot from America flying out to some shithole for their fuckpuppet. It is also a much better opportunity for the show to fake things and create scenarios that only come up more naturally on the regular show.

And yeah, I just can't even look at Darcey's face (or her sister's). They look like science experiments.
I know we all have our preferences when it comes to looks and all but I've never understood the attraction to the stereotypical plastic surgery look. I can't take them seriously man. When she was crying an episode or two ago I couldn't help but laugh, she looked so fuckin weird.

But ya man, I'll be definitely going back to the start of the main series. I think it's on Hulu right?
 

Grinchy

Banned
I know we all have our preferences when it comes to looks and all but I've never understood the attraction to the stereotypical plastic surgery look. I can't take them seriously man. When she was crying an episode or two ago I couldn't help but laugh, she looked so fuckin weird.

But ya man, I'll be definitely going back to the start of the main series. I think it's on Hulu right?
Oh, if you want a drinking game, have everyone drink any time one of Darcey's scenes play out for more than 3 minutes without her crying. Everyone will get alcohol poisoning. I can't remember the last one of her segments that didn't have her doing her dry ugly cry where all the botox scrunches up and blocks her tear ducts.
 

Bildo_Shaggins

Neo Member
Oh, if you want a drinking game, have everyone drink any time one of Darcey's scenes play out for more than 3 minutes without her crying. Everyone will get alcohol poisoning. I can't remember the last one of her segments that didn't have her doing her dry ugly cry where all the botox scrunches up and blocks her tear ducts.
Poor Darcey is an emotional dumpster fire. You have to admit that Jesse is a bit of a douche though.
 
H

hariseldon

Unconfirmed Member
Poor Darcey is an emotional dumpster fire. You have to admit that Jesse is a bit of a douche though.

Both her men were cunts tbh, no doubt about that, but you're right that she's a dumpster fire. Her daughters are more grown up than her ffs and they're 14 or something like that when they were last on screen. Tbh though a little bit of me wonders if there's an element of her being attracted to that type of guy and a element of men getting so fed up of her tantrums and pouting that they get emotionally distant. Certainly I don't deal well with women who cry all the damn time (and dear god she's an ugly crier) and will tend to slowly back away which can sometimes come off as cold. The thing with that kind of emotional wreck is that they tend to infect anyone they touch, their drama inevitably becomes your drama.
 
190521_3959863__90_Day_Fiance_____Darcey_Silva_Says_She__Cu_800x450_1525760067620.jpg


Meow
 
No doubt. Jessie is an actual sociopath like Ash. Tom's not too great either.

But I just cannot take Darcey. She's psychotic and seems to have a brain that stopped developing by like 10th grade.
She's in her mid-40s and super desperate to get remarried. She's lonely, she wants someone to be with for the rest of her life and that's why she is so damn clingy and emotionally volatile. She's broken. She needs me in her life to fix her issues. Me and my big meaty brain.
 

Grinchy

Banned
She's in her mid-40s and super desperate to get remarried. She's lonely, she wants someone to be with for the rest of her life and that's why she is so damn clingy and emotionally volatile. She's broken. She needs me in her life to fix her issues. Me and my big meaty brain.
lol well shit, you should go get her!

Drive out to Connecticut with a letter you wrote and put it under her windshield wiper.
 

TriSuit666

Banned
It's the current (4th) season of Before the 90 Days. It gets really confusing because there's
  • 90 Day Fiancé
  • 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days
  • 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way
And those are the good ones. Then there are even more spinoffs
  • 90 Day Fiancé: What Now?
  • 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After?
  • 90 Day Fiancé: Pillow Talk
  • 90 Day Fiancé: Self-Quarantined
This show is such unbelievable trash and it's amazing how much content they film and stretch out :messenger_tears_of_joy:

And yet you missed the greatest one of all off, the spin-off that ended abruptly, it was never heard of again:

The Family Chantel.
 
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Grinchy

Banned
And yet you missed the greatest one of all off, the spin-off that ended abruptly, it was never heard of again:

The Family Chantel.
That is one even I can't watch. The same fights and arguments over and over again with them.

I did watch the newest Quarantine episode though and these 2 were on it.
 

TriSuit666

Banned
That is one even I can't watch. The same fights and arguments over and over again with them.

I did watch the newest Quarantine episode though and these 2 were on it.

Are they really? I haven’t watched the quarantine eps yet.

But yeah, so boring even the producers got fed up with them, lol.
 

Bildo_Shaggins

Neo Member
And yet you missed the greatest one of all off, the spin-off that ended abruptly, it was never heard of again:

The Family Chantel.
Only redeeming factor was watching Chantel's absolutely humongous jiggling juggs and Pedro's eternally stoned facial expression. Damn those Chantel titties are made for mouff milking.

There is a Darcey and Stacey move out to LA spin-off in the works.
 
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Bildo_Shaggins

Neo Member
i watched TFC for Chantel’s tits. Literally the only reason.
Chantel is bouncing around like a cowgirl with them titties on the quarantine episode while Pedro is going around calling her Pinky Winky for some odd reason. It's worth a watch. Pedro wants to become a photographer. Chantel needs to do some nudes.
 

Grinchy

Banned
Chantel has a crazy body, but I don't know if I could stand being around her. I feel like I could last maybe 2 days in a relationship with her crazy ass.
 

008

Banned
Chantel has a crazy body, but I don't know if I could stand being around her. I feel like I could last maybe 2 days in a relationship with her crazy ass.

Boning good looking women makes men do strange things and awful decisions.

just look at these shows. The ugly dudes just care about looks.
 

Grinchy

Banned
Lots of fights to bring the season nearer to a close. But they hit us with a big one. Our poor (rich) old man David decided to go on a 5th attempt to see the woman he has paid to talk to by the minute for 7 years. She convinced him she was just having cold feet but still wanted to meet. I think the show's production was in contact with her this whole time.

So after she stood him up yet again because "she had to go to her nephew's hockey game," she finally, actually met with him a few days later. Obviously, the episode cuts off there and makes you wait for next week.

The fake lesbian Stephanie, who is only on the show to push her youtube channel and her $50 bad nudes, faked another fight where she dramatically threw a plate on the ground and stormed out yet again with yet another tear-less cry.
 
Lots of fights to bring the season nearer to a close. But they hit us with a big one. Our poor (rich) old man David decided to go on a 5th attempt to see the woman he has paid to talk to by the minute for 7 years. She convinced him she was just having cold feet but still wanted to meet. I think the show's production was in contact with her this whole time.

So after she stood him up yet again because "she had to go to her nephew's hockey game," she finally, actually met with him a few days later. Obviously, the episode cuts off there and makes you wait for next week.

The fake lesbian Stephanie, who is only on the show to push her youtube channel and her $50 bad nudes, faked another fight where she dramatically threw a plate on the ground and stormed out yet again with yet another tear-less cry.
You may be right about the old idiot, but I think she's just an expert scammer. She knows that all she has to do is show up once every five trips and he'll still send her money to chat. He's a fuckin moron and I hate to say it, but he deserves it.

I mentioned earlier how this reminded me of a story someone had told me years back. I used to work a job where I would do food delivery and over time you would get to know your customers. There was this dude I used to deliver to that was in his early 50's - single dude with a yellow lab and the guy was always drunk when I saw him. Homeboy would usually tell me stupid stories that I could hardly pretend to give a shit about, dude give me my tip and let me bounce. Anyway, one night he was telling me about how he had a friend around his same age that got into this Russian mail order bride type shit.

The friend was pretty well off and worked in the financial sector pulling 150k or so a year (this is circa 2008). Super hot chick in her 30's, they're chatting for months and months and eventually he agrees to fly her out to San Francisco. They end up hitting it off and she decides to stay in America. Soon after that they get married. Six months or so later this guy comes home from a work related trip and comes home to his house missing all kinds of valuables - gold, watches, etc. Guy also finds that a shitload of money has been wired out of his checking account to some strange account. Long story not as long, he ends up getting in contact with the FBI and they basically let him know that the website he met this girl on was essentially a front for the Russian mob and they do this kind of shit to well off Americans non stop.

As for the rest of the episode I'm extremely disappointed we didn't get any Usman/Lisa - they've become the most engaging storyline IMO. Avery needs to GTFO while she can, Ash is a nut. Geoffrey, like stated before is a future serial killer, he's a psycho as well. Professional tittay deceptor Stephanie is out of her damn mind and will never have a meaningful peaceful relationship. She's going to be overweight ugly and single when she's 40 while still blaming all her issues on everyone else. Ed, to be honest, I'm happy Rose told him to fuck off, I feel like she has some integrity - but that storyline has become a bit stale.
 

Bildo_Shaggins

Neo Member
You may be right about the old idiot, but I think she's just an expert scammer. She knows that all she has to do is show up once every five trips and he'll still send her money to chat. He's a fuckin moron and I hate to say it, but he deserves it.

I mentioned earlier how this reminded me of a story someone had told me years back. I used to work a job where I would do food delivery and over time you would get to know your customers. There was this dude I used to deliver to that was in his early 50's - single dude with a yellow lab and the guy was always drunk when I saw him. Homeboy would usually tell me stupid stories that I could hardly pretend to give a shit about, dude give me my tip and let me bounce. Anyway, one night he was telling me about how he had a friend around his same age that got into this Russian mail order bride type shit.

The friend was pretty well off and worked in the financial sector pulling 150k or so a year (this is circa 2008). Super hot chick in her 30's, they're chatting for months and months and eventually he agrees to fly her out to San Francisco. They end up hitting it off and she decides to stay in America. Soon after that they get married. Six months or so later this guy comes home from a work related trip and comes home to his house missing all kinds of valuables - gold, watches, etc. Guy also finds that a shitload of money has been wired out of his checking account to some strange account. Long story not as long, he ends up getting in contact with the FBI and they basically let him know that the website he met this girl on was essentially a front for the Russian mob and they do this kind of shit to well off Americans non stop.

As for the rest of the episode I'm extremely disappointed we didn't get any Usman/Lisa - they've become the most engaging storyline IMO. Avery needs to GTFO while she can, Ash is a nut. Geoffrey, like stated before is a future serial killer, he's a psycho as well. Professional tittay deceptor Stephanie is out of her damn mind and will never have a meaningful peaceful relationship. She's going to be overweight ugly and single when she's 40 while still blaming all her issues on everyone else. Ed, to be honest, I'm happy Rose told him to fuck off, I feel like she has some integrity - but that storyline has become a bit stale.
I was honestly shocked that Lana actually showed up.
 

jshackles

Gentlemen, we can rebuild it. We have the capability to make the world's first enhanced store. Steam will be that store. Better than it was before.

Grinchy

Banned
Wow, never knew about that crazy ass Geoffrey. It was clear that he was not wired right, but I didn't know it went that deep.

It also goes to show just how low they'll go to get some potentially good content. The show knows he'd never be able to sponsor her on a K-1 visa because of his criminal past, but they shove him in front of the camera anyway.
 
Wow, never knew about that crazy ass Geoffrey. It was clear that he was not wired right, but I didn't know it went that deep.

It also goes to show just how low they'll go to get some potentially good content. The show knows he'd never be able to sponsor her on a K-1 visa because of his criminal past, but they shove him in front of the camera anyway.
The way the dude carries himself immediately set off red flags for me. I've known people like him. There's this certain look where people put on this super thin facade of happyness and kindness, but they're just 2 steps away from snapping and going batshit crazy. I thought this and told my girlfriend in the first episode before we knew about his history. Ash is a nut and probably has a murder or two in him, but Geoffrey is potential serial killer material.

The way he acted on the way to and at the airport - completely psychotic. Thank god Varya said no, she seems like a genuinely cool person
 

Grinchy

Banned
I wonder if the show edited out Geoffrey telling Varya about all of his crimes, or if he really only told her about the one from 20 years ago.

Him constantly talking about how he's "not the same person" as the one who sold drugs falls pretty flat if months before filming, he was dragging a girlfriend around and smashing her head into walls. And 4 divorces? God damn man, just live alone and stop subjecting people to your psychosis.
 
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Grinchy

Banned
Somehow I always forget about the Big Ed segments, even though they are good. This has to be one of the first times that a desperate young mom who bathes with a bucket in a shack that doesn't even have a complete roof is so repulsed by her American mark that she turns him down.

Ed got in way over his head (lol) with this one. I think he got there and despite realizing that they had no chemistry, that her chicken legs were hairy as hell, and that she had horrible breath, he still desperately wanted it to work because he knew he'd look like such an idiot to his friends and family if it was all as ridiculous as they had assumed. But, he was such a douche that she turned him away :messenger_tears_of_joy:
 

jshackles

Gentlemen, we can rebuild it. We have the capability to make the world's first enhanced store. Steam will be that store. Better than it was before.
Somehow I always forget about the Big Ed segments, even though they are good. This has to be one of the first times that a desperate young mom who bathes with a bucket in a shack that doesn't even have a complete roof is so repulsed by her American mark that she turns him down.

Ed got in way over his head (lol) with this one. I think he got there and despite realizing that they had no chemistry, that her chicken legs were hairy as hell, and that she had horrible breath, he still desperately wanted it to work because he knew he'd look like such an idiot to his friends and family if it was all as ridiculous as they had assumed. But, he was such a douche that she turned him away :messenger_tears_of_joy:
What I don't understand about the people on this show (besides that none of it matters because it's likely almost all fake anyway) is that the people - especially those on the Before the 90 Days series - always ignore the advice of their closest family and friends. In the case of Ed, his grown daughter straight up stopped talking to him when he told her he was dating a 23 year old. Geoffrey's teenagers were all like "dad, bro, don't do this..." and he should have listened to them. Every single one of David's friends told him to give up on Lana because she was obviously scamming him. Ashley and Jay from a few seasons ago, her best friend tried to warn her that Jay was a sleeze and she didn't listen and it went poorly for her.

Perhaps this is the case because most people who actually listen to their close friends and family would do so when they said "don't go on this trashy TV show".
 

Grinchy

Banned
This season has felt the most fake of them all to me. Almost the whole cast is made up of people who are clearly using the show for exposure.

Stephanie is pretending to be bisexual to get YouTube viewers and sell $50 prude nudes. Usman thinks he'll become a famous rapper under the name Sojaboy. Ed probably thinks this will help him get more jobs as a "fertographer," ect. Everyone has some hustle they are running.

There was no point in even having Darcey on the show, but here she is casually mentioning her clothing business here and there. The show has always had fake nonsense, but this season feels like a turning point. They will let anyone attempting to promote something on the Before the 90 series now.
 

jshackles

Gentlemen, we can rebuild it. We have the capability to make the world's first enhanced store. Steam will be that store. Better than it was before.
Wild theory: David is a time traveler from the early 1990s. It explains so much: the hair, the clothes, that fucking ridiculous jacket, the fact that he's willing to pay for online chats.
 

diffusionx

Gold Member
Wild theory: David is a time traveler from the early 1990s. It explains so much: the hair, the clothes, that fucking ridiculous jacket, the fact that he's willing to pay for online chats.

I don't understand that at all. I've never used any of those Russian mail order bride type sites but pay-by-minute? In 2020? Who the fuck is doing that? Just use Tinder passport lmao.
 
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jshackles

Gentlemen, we can rebuild it. We have the capability to make the world's first enhanced store. Steam will be that store. Better than it was before.
I saw a thread on Reddit where someone was able to track down the actual site that David used to talk to Lana. Apparently, the site has a "100% guarantee" that the girls you are talking to are real. Supposedly, the owner of the site more or less coerced Lana into meeting David in real life and on TV otherwise she would be "fired" from her job as an emotional cam girl. Makes sense.
 
I saw a thread on Reddit where someone was able to track down the actual site that David used to talk to Lana. Apparently, the site has a "100% guarantee" that the girls you are talking to are real. Supposedly, the owner of the site more or less coerced Lana into meeting David in real life and on TV otherwise she would be "fired" from her job as an emotional cam girl. Makes sense.
HAHAHA!!!

That's even funnier than the other possible outcomes. My original guess was they found "Lana" but it was actually not her that he was talking to - some classic catfish shit.

I really have no sympathy for the guy. I just don't see how someone can convince themselves that someone they pay TO TALK TO actually likes them. He's going to keep trickin' until the day he dies
 

Grinchy

Banned
I would not be shocked at all if that's the explanation for why Lana finally showed up. I can't wait for the next episode to see how awkward it is when she has to spend time around him.

I have zero sympathy as well. You can't get mad at the camgirls - you have to just shake your head at the thirsty simps.
 

Grinchy

Banned
In the new Quarantine episode, they only let Patrick (from season 1) come on and plug his "music" if he got an awkward interaction with the french scammer Mirriam. He succeeded! What stuck out to me was that she's living with her parents during quarantine and has the room of a 12 year old girl. Pictures and stickers everywhere, Hello Kitty shit, ect. This bitch is like 25.

qDKRZpg.png
 

diffusionx

Gold Member
Finally got around to watching the last episode, I'm on a delay because... reasons.

Anyway, imagine what tier of man you have to be to offer a woman a no-questions-asked pass to the USA with her son, and she says "nope, I would rather we stay where we are and sleep with a tarp over our head." Like holy shit.

And also, Lana, wtf.
 
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