How should I feel about this?
On one hand I know she is perfectly capable of finishing medical school and being a great doctor but on the other hand I want her to do what she wants to do. At issue is that she wants a career that would essentially allow her to stop working once she had kids.
On one hand I appreciate that she has the best interests of our hypothetical children at heart but on the other hand she has a relaxed approach to life. Calling it laziness is going a step too far, but she doesn't want to be stressed or do difficult work despite her abilities. She was raised for most of her life in the Middle East and I feel the relaxed, laid back culture there is having an effect on her outlook (i.e. her mother doesn't work, and barely has a college education), especially when you compare that to American culture which is far more industrious.
Advice?
I love her and I see us having a future together but at the same time I would want my wife to have a career of her own and when we have children both contributing equally to the care of those children. I don't have a problem with someone taking time off from work to raise children but at some point that period ends and you go back to work - my girlfriend seems to think of this as an indefinite period of time off.
The other issue is I want my children to have a great life and have all their needs provided for and more; I'm not 100% we would be able to do that on a single income but she seems to think this is okay.
Obviously we are going to talk about this more but I want to solicit the opinions of the community here because I'm not sure if my concerns are valid or if they are selfish. She has every right to pursue the type of lifestyle she wants but there is the reality that the type of life we could provide for our kids would be severely limited on a single income.
Full disclosure: We are both 21 going on 22. I'm about a month older than her. I'm in grad school but I will be done and earning an income far sooner than she will.
On one hand I know she is perfectly capable of finishing medical school and being a great doctor but on the other hand I want her to do what she wants to do. At issue is that she wants a career that would essentially allow her to stop working once she had kids.
On one hand I appreciate that she has the best interests of our hypothetical children at heart but on the other hand she has a relaxed approach to life. Calling it laziness is going a step too far, but she doesn't want to be stressed or do difficult work despite her abilities. She was raised for most of her life in the Middle East and I feel the relaxed, laid back culture there is having an effect on her outlook (i.e. her mother doesn't work, and barely has a college education), especially when you compare that to American culture which is far more industrious.
Advice?
I love her and I see us having a future together but at the same time I would want my wife to have a career of her own and when we have children both contributing equally to the care of those children. I don't have a problem with someone taking time off from work to raise children but at some point that period ends and you go back to work - my girlfriend seems to think of this as an indefinite period of time off.
The other issue is I want my children to have a great life and have all their needs provided for and more; I'm not 100% we would be able to do that on a single income but she seems to think this is okay.
Obviously we are going to talk about this more but I want to solicit the opinions of the community here because I'm not sure if my concerns are valid or if they are selfish. She has every right to pursue the type of lifestyle she wants but there is the reality that the type of life we could provide for our kids would be severely limited on a single income.
Full disclosure: We are both 21 going on 22. I'm about a month older than her. I'm in grad school but I will be done and earning an income far sooner than she will.
