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Do you really expect me to eat this shit?!

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Sinatar said:
Found a pic of DocPan's date.

34zysgl.jpg
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what. did you just make. me watch.

:( :( :( :(















:(
 
Was reading the first paragraph and it all reminded me of Docpan's threads, and sure enough I see the username. Such a distinct writing style!

Also as others have said, one bad meal isn't going to ruin your figure. I'm sure your date didn't enjoy being dragged through the park looking for the right spot when she was hungry too. You are supposed to have FUN at an amusement park; let go a little and live loose. That includes indulging in some 'bad' fatty foods and snacks for the day. You're treating yourself. People don't go to amusement parks expecting to find tofu and wheatgrass shakes. :lol

I will say that it's BS they wouldn't let you take your protein bars and such in. If a person actually had a strict diet and could only eat certain things, that's a crappy policy which could end up getting the park in trouble if someone got sick on the food there or passed out cuz they couldn't eat anything.

I can understand why they wouldn't let you take like McDonalds or other fast food in the park. But pre-packaged protein bars; what's the deal?
 
Why does that female bodybuilder picture keep getting quoted on EVERY page?

I couldn't care less if the girl I date works out or not-- as long as she's hot why should I give a shit? To the other comment about me not bringing any food for her: um, do you know how expensive good protein powder is....? Let her eat a hamburger, I don't care.
 
Docpan said:
Why does that female bodybuilder picture keep getting quoted on EVERY page?

I couldn't care less if the girl I date works out or not-- as long as she's hot why should I give a shit? To the other comment about me not bringing any food for her: um, do you know how expensive good protein powder is....? Let her eat a hamburger, I don't care.
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4kf2nhk_th.gif

You can't be fucking serious.
 
 
 
Docpan said:
Without even saying a single word, someone who is in shape is able to scream out "FUCK YOU!" to everyone around them. In the perfect world scenario, I'd rip off my shirt upon arriving at the beach and see every other dude look up, stare in disbelief, and then hang their heads in shame before picking up their shit and leaving. That's what summer is all about-- you've either got it, or you don't! No bullshit, just results.
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Docpan said:
As a solution, I held in the gas 'till we actually got going on the rides, then I let it rip like no other while we were in transit. Yeah, I'm the man.
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Docpan said:
Fuck no I don't have a medical condition. Unless of course you consider being ripped a medical condition.
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Docpan said:
I've got to have that competitive edge, and I HAVE to be picky. Nothing feminine about it. You know why? Because I want that number one spot, and if I fuck up, the other guy who didn't will get that edge.
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Docpan said:
My bottom line is this. I don't give a shit if everyone eats shit, and looks like shit. But for me, I don't fuck around about it. If you have a goal, you either do it or don't. Pretty straightforward.
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Docpan said:
If I drink, I'm going to to be stumbling, if not blackout-level.
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You are one of the greatest people I have ever heard of. Being around you has got to be some kind of experience. You really are the fucking man
 
If docpan wrote a book, I'd buy it.

And yes, I encourage you, docpan, to write a book. You have at least one confirmed sale.
 
gamerecks said:
At least DocPan didnt almost shit his pants this time.
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It was a close call. Anyone who has ever overdosed on protein before can tell you that it causes painful bloating, if not a full-on case of the runs.

I am kind of OCD about never, ever taking shits in public restrooms. When I was a kid in elementary school, I was taking a shit in the stall when this unknown assailant began furiously pounding on the door out of nowhere. It was seriously one of the most frightening experiences because I only had my sense of sound to rely on as he stalked about. I actually held the door shut with my feet while the little fucker laughed his ass off at my expense. He then soaked a shitload of paper towels in the sink, and launched them over the top of the stall on top of my head. That shit scarred me for life, and I never did find out who it was.

With that being said, I was able to hold my crap back until I got home. On a side note, does anyone else ever enjoy sitting on the toilet seat while reading/playing DS so long that when you stand up you lose all feelings in your legs?
 
Docpan said:
I am kind of OCD about never, ever taking shits in public restrooms. When I was a kid in elementary school, I was taking a shit in the stall when this unknown assailant began furiously pounding on the door out of nowhere. It was seriously one of the most frightening experiences because I only had my sense of sound to rely on as he stalked about. I actually held the door shut with my feet while the little fucker laughed his ass off at my expense. He then soaked a shitload of paper towels in the sink, and launched them over the top of the stall on top of my head. That shit scarred me for life, and I never did find out who it was.
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ladies and gents, we've found the reasoning behind docpan's anger.
 
Oh man, I completely ignored this thread and then I realized it was Docpan! I thought he was banned or something. Gonna go read the OP now.

Edit: I left satisfied, the lolz were brought. Docpan, we need some more Summer stories.

More rage in the next thread, though.
 
NoRéN said:
Oh, now I get it! this is what they meant by joke characters.
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Haha It's you who I was thinking about in that thread! Totally forgot your name :lol

MWS Natural said:
I think that obnoxious roid rage guy who always makes those legendary threads of douchebagery HAS to be a joke character. I find it hard to believe there are people on the planet who really think the way he does.
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As someone who lives in VA and has gone to Busch Gardens plenty of times(thankfully not this year), I have this to say to you sir: Grow a pair.

Funnel cakes > You

Not everyone that eats delicious, non-healthy food is a fatty.
 
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