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[NCR Redslayer]

Spoiler

No im not making this because of the vegeta thread.

So some of you might remember me from an earlier thread pertaining to a certain anime. I dont blame if you if are upset and want blood and think this kilobyte file of a text is meaningless but here me out. Bonus point if you read my early thread and know whats going.

So this past week I've been in a slump(maybe thats too light of a word). My brother has recently been in a car crash. He doesnt want to tell details and i dont want to ask but what i can infer is A) he lost his car B) he lost his job and i dont even want to think of this but C) someone might be dead. Coupled with the fact that my dad suffered a spinal injury recently and i think my sister is getting divorced with two kids, you can guess how it goes. Well anyhoo, summer is almost over and that means that school is back. Eagerly awaiting to eat pizza every day, i cheeck my schedule and financial aid. Turns out Im getting none and owe 3267 dollars cause i failed my second(albeit first) semester. I also failed half my classes which were remedial and required since i attended in the spring semester because i failed to somehow sign up during the fall.I now have 2 weeks to pay or else i get kicked out. Since i cant even drive as of 19 you know my options are limited. As for what i do next, its either kill myself or come clean. Since im alot saner(? That the word right?) than my early thread. I've decided im going to come clean and tell my family. I dont want them to worry about me with so much else going on so i plan to get professional help as i can. (Dont go through my profile to look it it but at this point i dont care

Spoiler

Mod plz lock it

. I thought i could do it but teared up in the beginning and lied about getting soap in my eye since i had a cold shower after breaking kayfabe in the vegeta thread. Better than jumping out the bathroom window falling in slow mo.

Well now since I've come clean i feel like a lot better about the way things. Im no longer the same broken op that you saw run away but a macho mexican who dont need no man. So thanks gaf and Goodbye.

The block of text almost literally says nothing.

Ok ill tldr then.
I fucked up
Owe college money
Family is shit
Thoughts of suicide
Plan to get shit together.

Im sorry if im an asshole but im trying to keep it together for now.
Again really sorry.

Spoiler

not really tho since im not macho enough to leave obtaining gaf gold[notspoiler]

Ps

Spoiler

Vegeta may have jobbed but hes still my favorite character before gohan.

 

[blame space]

i think about it all the time

 

[NoblesseOblige]

My life hasn't gotten to that stage yet.

 

[BennyBlanco]

i like how you somehow sandwiched this moment of clarity with some musings about anime.

 

[Awful Falafel]

This all implies I ever had my shit together to begin with

P.S. Dropping out of college is far from the end of the world and given the family situation you've described paying for professional help seems....extravagant. You need an income like yesterday, take the bus and be a wage slave. That way you'll get to know true despair AND pay down debts and help the fam.

 

[NCR Redslayer]

i like how you somehow sandwiched this moment of clarity with some musings about anime.

I still own my vegeta pillow case god damn it.

 

[olympia]

hey man you can't leave. you're the only other person who like dan dan kokoro hikareteku

 

[faridmon]

I never had my shit together so there is nothing I could even wonder about.

 

[friskykillface]

going to a private college was the beginning of the falling apart , student loan hell has about 5 more years in my life if im lucky
not having a major in college x taking forever to decide one was another part

basically college fucked my life up @_@ , and it wasn't even the drugs x parties x people I dated that was the problem with it , smh college

 

[Sonic Hill]

Every single fucking day of my pathetic ass life.

OP come clean about what? Or is it too personal to tell?

 

[evil solrac v3.0]

You can't fix your brother's sister's or father's problem. Fix yours first before helping anyone or even thinking about them. You're 19 you have a LOT ( and I mean A LOT) of time to get your life in order. This is a bump in the road. This never happened. Move on and get back to what you want to do the most. As to when my life fell apart, it could have been three years ago or 25 years ago. But I'm picking up he pieces and trying to build and start over.
Edit : P.s fuck you for spoiling DBS for me.
Edit 2: who doesn't love Dan Dan kokoro hikareteku? Insanity.

 

[NCR Redslayer]

Every single fucking day of my pathetic ass life.

OP come clean about what? Or is it too personal to tell?

Um theres a block of text newbie.

 

[blame space]

anytime anyone is talking about Dragonball z they're really talking about something else from their childhood

 

[UraMallas]

Um theres a block of text newbie.

The block of text almost literally says nothing.

EDIT: Oooh, I thought he meant come clean with GAF. I need sleep.

 

[Kyne]

Every single fucking day of my pathetic ass life.

OP come clean about what? Or is it too personal to tell?

he fucked himself at school.

it's okay OP. I fucked up at school too. When I came clean my parents thought they had failed me. That's probably the part that hurt the worst.

Anyways, eventually it worked out. I just got my first big boy job and my life is greatly improving. Just try and make good decisions from now on.

 

[Otakumegane]

I've been there in high school.

Luckily my family supported me and I'm doing a lot better, but it has completely warped my world view. I'm glad that it didn't last until college (well too long into it I mean the aftereffects were still very much existent)

 

[Sonic Hill]

The block of text almost literally says nothing.

Thank you. Took the words right out of my mouth.

OP, don't be a smart ass, it's not helping your situation.

 

[NCR Redslayer]

The block of text almost literally says nothing.

Ok ill tldr then.
I fucked up
Owe college money
Family is shit
Thoughts of suicide
Plan to get shit together.

Im sorry if im an asshole but im trying to keep it together for now.

 

[titiklabingapat]

You can't fix your brother's sister's or father's problem. Fix yours first before helping anyone or even thinking about them. You're 19 you have a LOT ( and I mean A LOT) of time to get your life in order. This is a bump in the road. This never happened. Move on and get back to what you want to do the most. As to when my life fell apart, it could have been three years ago or 25 years ago. But I'm picking up he pieces and trying to build and start over.
Edit : P.s fuck you for spoiling DBS for me.
Edit 2: who doesn't love Dan Dan kokoro hikareteku? Insanity.

He is right,you know. You cannot control what other people do with their life. The only thing you can do (for now) is focus on you and changing those you can change. You're 19. You have all the time in the world. Trust me.

 

[Lactose_Intolerant]

How did you manage to fail your classes?

 

[UraMallas]

Ok ill tldr then.
I fucked up
Owe college money
Family is shit
Thoughts of suicide
Plan to get shit together.

Im sorry if im an asshole but im trying to keep it together for now.

I like your last bullet point best. I'm rooting for you, man.

 

[fredrancour]

anytime anyone is talking about Dragonball z they're really talking about something else from their childhood

i think this is my new favorite sentence from gaf.

 

[BennyBlanco]

I still own my vegeta pillow case god damn it.

vegeta is the thinking man's favorite dbz character.

 

[titiklabingapat]

Let the college thing be a valuable lesson. Try to be on top of things from now on. Get double confirmation on everything and if you aren't sure about something, triple check so there are no more surprises.

 

[Lucentto]

Kind of how I feel right now. Strange thing is things have actually been going well for me, but I still feel like shit and don't know why.

 

[olympia]

best tag

 

[Astral Dog]

about nine years ago.

 

[Corpekata]

What exactly can you "come clean" about?

 

[echoshifting]

Is a college education something you actually want? Not everybody has to go to college to live a happy life, if you're failing half your classes you might not be on the right path. You can always go back when you're more ready for it. I didn't start until I was 21, some people wait even longer.

 

[NCR Redslayer]

What exactly can you "come clean" about?

Im a fuck boy that wasted their resources and lied about it for a year? Im not a poster boy.

Is a college education something you actually want? Not everybody has to go to college to live a happy life, if you're failing half your classes you might not be on the right path. You can always go back when you're more ready for it. I didn't start until I was 21, some people wait even longer.

But all ive ever known is get a degree, get out of the ghetto.
And oh god i saw the tag.....

 

[Bounceounce]

Start of of 11th grade.

 

[MogCakes]

I had a moment similar to yours OP after an incident a few days ago. Don't give up dude, life is much more than college.

 

[randome]

Every day unfortunately. :/

 

[Sonic Hill]

Im a fuck boy that wasted their resources and lied about it for a year? Im not a poster boy.

But all ive ever known is get a degree, get out of the ghetto.
And oh god i saw the tag.....

Lol, so I get yelled at for the same question, but he doesn't? Fuck is your problem?

 

[thesoapster]

Started cracking in grade school. Started falling apart in high school. Have since figured out as life is put back together that I neither belong in the religious community I was raised in nor in mainstream society. So it feels like many things are still totally broken.

 

[JDHarbs]

Is a college education something you actually want? Not everybody has to go to college to live a happy life, if you're failing half your classes you might not be on the right path. You can always go back when you're more ready for it. I didn't start until I was 21, some people wait even longer.

I second this.

Large student debt was something I desperately wanted to avoid in college so after my first semester when I had doubts about what I wanted to do, I took a break. The next year I enrolled in community college where classes were cheaper and allowed me to try some in a few potential careers that I was interested in. Now I've got my associates degree, and lots of transferable credits towards a bachelors in what I decide to pursue. All at a fraction of the cost. Plus, it bought me time to grow as a person who simply wasn't ready for the pressure of college at the time.

Never feel rushed to decide on your future.

Started cracking in grade school. Started falling apart in high school. Have since figured out as life is put back together that I neither belong in the religious community I was raised in nor in mainstream society. So it feels like many things are still totally broken.

Are you me?

 

[Awful Falafel]

Im a fuck boy that wasted their resources and lied about it for a year? Im not a poster boy.

But all ive ever known is get a degree, get out of the ghetto.
And oh god i saw the tag.....

Whelp, guess being prince of Jobbers is your destiny now.

 

[Kurtofan]

two months ago seems like a good start

 

[Forerunner]

Hmm you’re fine, it could be a lot worse. You’re young and we all make mistakes, it’s how you learn and get better. If college is something you really want to do then continue with it, however there are other opportunities besides college. Personally, I wasn’t ready for college right out of high school, so I joined the military and after my service I went to college and finished my degree.

However, you’re taking the right steps at the moment by realizing your mistakes, and now it’s up to you to improve yourself or not. Will you fight or perish like a dog?

 

[karasu]

At 14. With busted knuckles and bloodshot eyes, I'm still trying to right the ship.

 

[VanillaCakeIsBurning]

I had my shit together for a period of about 5 days then exploded around 5 or so years ago.

I never recovered.

 

[Arkos]

Nah I can pretty much pinpoint when it happened

 

[hateradio]

Depression train is making all the stops tonight.

 

[Chezzymann]

Not right now because everythings fine. But I'm in the senior year of an animation degree that I stupidly chose and it will be very hard to lead to a job, and I have terrible social skills and havent made a new friend in 10 years (luckily i have one good one still), so things could go very south 10 years from now, or be fine if I get lucky. Hopefully I'm not still living with my parents.

 

[demon]

Yes

I would say it was the mid/late 90s, or high school. It was when my life started going off track in terms of personal and social development, and I never really recovered.

 

[Vault Dweller 111]

It hasn't. And I have no plans to let it.

 

[olympia]

hey man. guess what. 19 is prime time to make mistakes and do shit you regret. you are barely a legal adult. you can't even buy cigarettes in fucking california

you are still getting a grasp of what your true priorities are. everyone has their own path. people who are 29 reading this thread probably feel the way you do.

i know you're worried about confronting your family about what happened at school, but you need to remember that when you take responsibility, you should be doing it for yourself.

if you can immediately recognize something is wrong AND recognize that something needs to be done about it, you're heading in the right direction.

 

[sirap]

Stepping into adulthood is tough for anyone. Things might seem bleak, but life usually gets better as long as you keep trying.

Also, relax. You're not getting banned for that thread. Mods would've done it already if they wanted to

 

[samn]

hey man. guess what. 19 is prime time to make mistakes and do shit you regret. you are barely a legal adult. you can't even buy cigarettes in fucking california

19 is when I decided to blow £50k on a degree that I ultimately hated and failed in. Now it's going to be impossible for me to afford to go back and study something I could actually make a career in because loans are only made available for the first course taken.

 

[TickleMeElbow]

hey man. guess what. 19 is prime time to make mistakes and do shit you regret. you are barely a legal adult. you can't even buy cigarettes in fucking california

you are still getting a grasp of what your true priorities are. everyone has their own path. people who are 29 reading this thread probably feel the way you do.

i know you're worried about confronting your family about what happened at school, but you need to remember that when you take responsibility, you should be doing it for yourself.

if you can immediately recognize something is wrong AND recognize that something needs to be done about it, you're heading in the right direction.

This OP.

I made the biggest mistake of my life at around 19 which was start drinking everyday, and by 26 I had cirrhosis. I'm 29 now, three years sober, and just starting to get a vague idea of what I should be doing.

At least you know you fucked up. I wish I started thinking about that shit when I was your age. I basically lost an entire decade. But I'm still alive.

Shit happens haha.