For Larger Customers, Eating Out Is Still a Daunting Experience

Nov 21, 2014
11,921
130
390
#1
From the New YOrk Times- https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/12/dining/larger-customers-restaurants.html

For people who identify as large, plus-size or fat, dining out can be a social and physical minefield. Chairs with arms or impossibly small seats leave marks and bruises. Meals are spent in pain, or filled with worry that a flimsy chair might collapse.
But restaurants don’t have to make it harder by ignoring a customer’s physical reality, she said.
“It puts the onus on the fat person,” said Ms. Baker, 32, who fluctuates between size 22 and 24. “We are the paying customers. We are paying you. We want to be comfortable and treated like humans.”
Bruce Sturgell, 39, who founded the culture and clothing website Chubstr in 2011, said he walks into every restaurant expecting to be uncomfortable. He wears a size XXL or XXXL shirt — the smaller side of big, he says.
“We’re in the early stages of this movement about fat acceptance and body positivity, and you’re seeing it in fashion and on television but not so much in restaurants,” he said.
We are in a great cultural moment where people are talking about equity and inclusion, and size falls into that,” said Cheryl Durst, 57, chief executive of the International Interior Design Association.
Other changes are a nod to design trends and consumer preferences. The Golden Corral buffet chain last year adopted a roomier look that will eventually be adopted in all 491 of its restaurants. There is more space between tables, and sturdy, armless wooden chairs that the company said will lend a homier feel.

Taco Bell has stopped bolting tables to the floor, and has added movable seating in some stores to better serve groups of diners, said Matt Prince, the company’s senior manager for public relations and brand experience.

Over the years, large diners have tried to draw attention to their needs through protests and legal action. The efforts, though, have been sporadic.
Ms. Howell, 71, is 5-foot-8 and weighs about 300 pounds. When she and friends find a restaurant they like in Las Vegas, where the organization is based, they sometimes bring their own comfortable folding chairs.
It doesn’t always work out that way. Traci Armstrong, 46, who runs Specialty Catering in Bluffton, S.C., travels to eat at the nation’s best restaurants as a hobby. She is 5-foot-4 and about 335 pounds. She always books two airline seats.

She flew to Washington, D.C., over a holiday weekend to eat at Pineapple and Pearls, which has two Michelin stars. When she got there, her reserved seat was at a stationary bar stool at the chef’s counter. She didn’t fit. The staff offered to seat her outside or accommodate her at a sister restaurant, but she declined and left.

“I was mortified,” she said
Most diners, she said, simply want their size acknowledged without judgment.
“I’m fat,” she said. “And I deserve to eat in a restaurant and feel like I’m allowed to enjoy my life.”


Sit on me if old.
 
Nov 10, 2013
3,825
1,450
435
#2
How do you identify as fat? It doesn’t work that way.

“We are in a great cultural moment where people are talking about equity and inclusion, and size falls into that,”

This is a very dangerous line of thinking. Promoting and glorifying Obesity is not helping but harming these people. There really should be a push for healthy eating and nutrition education. All of the terrible additives and processed foods are killing people. Then the effects of this is glorified and accepted.

There are obvious conditions that cause obesity but there is a big swath that is poor lifestyle choices. This should not be praised.
 
Last edited:
Oct 1, 2006
3,412
2,867
1,090
#3
To be blunt, why shouldn't most fat people feel ashamed of their weight? When I was 380 I was that way because I would literally drink half a gallon of milk a day along with half a dozen sugar sodas and gigantic helpings of everything. That was all my fault, and I was disgusting. I would probably have had a heart attack by now if I had not lost the weight, and my keto is probably the only thing that reversed my pre-diabetes or I would be dealing with insulin.

It seems like it is 90%+ overweight women pushing this fat acceptance, even though (as a man, and from other obese males I've heard talk about it) we all have those same issues. We feel like we are physically unattractive (nonspoilers: we are), like people are watching us (nonspoilers: they are), and that people don't think we have self-control (nonspoilers: they do, and we don't). Why is that is a bad thing?
 
Last edited:

LMJ

Member
Feb 7, 2019
352
459
205
#9
Let me be perfectly Blunt when I state that I think the so called "obesity crisis" in this country is complete BS.

Let me also be on record in stating that our current unit of measurement of health and weight, the "BMI" is also massive BS.

However this article is ridiculous, it is not up to a restaurant to accommodate people who are too large for chairs which are often perfectly large enough to seat someone up to 200 pounds or above...

It is not up to the airline to supply extra large seat belts when the seat belts can already accommodate someone who is overweight.

These individuals are not overweight they are obese to morbidly obese and they need help, Not To be recognized as some kind of victims, but rather into making smart life choices that even standard overweight people can accomplish.

The victim complex and the blaming complex in this country needs to stop, we all have our individual liberties and we are free to express them, if I become overweight from bad life choices I should have to deal with the consequences not taxpayers.

That being said the government should stay the hell out of my refrigerator and my eating habits.
 
Jan 31, 2010
962
45
650
Canada, Toronto
#10
Being fat, or even too skinny are two extremes of the spectrum. It isn't healthy. There's a reason why the attraction is represented physically, to demonstrate good health and promote healthy offspring. There is a sense of disgust when we see both extremes. People can physically change, just look at Christian Bale and his dedication to such roles like the Machinist and Batman Begins. If anything people need to make life changes and make the effort if they want to be more acceptable. Gabriel Iglesias took the effort to lose weight, and that's because he does not want to die early. No one wants that. It's all about being health conscious.
 
Dec 18, 2013
1,818
1,396
430
#12
lol you don't identify as fat, you just are.
I have to say every time I go from Canada to the States, you guys amaze me.

I see lots of large people in Canada, like lots, but when I go down there it’s on a whole nother level. I’m seriously amazed at some of the shapes I see when visiting.
 
Likes: Greedings
Jun 8, 2004
16,788
154
1,430
43
Canada
#16
I'm fat, and at age 43 i'm feeling the repercussions of that (arthritis in my back and leg joins). But I've never had a problem fitting in a chair. If you can't fit in a normal sized chair at a restaurant, you are not fat you are morbidly obese. It should also be a huge flashing warning sign that you are going to have far worse (medical) problems than a sore ass from a chair too small for you. It isn't an identity, it's an eating disorder.
 
May 15, 2018
2,359
1,477
350
#18
being fat isnt a fucking state of mind or like something you identify as. thats so fucking stupid and such a weak way out because you have an addiction you cant control. and sure i know there are people who have issues with certain medical things which then they apparently cant control how they body metabolizes shit. but even fucking then i bet the people who have this issue still dont do anything anyway. they dont exercise arent active in any way this problem almost gives them the excuse
 
May 9, 2016
1,544
1,358
295
#20
I have to admit, the title is good, but I’m not seeing irony.

I hate to be the guy that wants the joke explained, but...
My read of it was eating out wouldn’t be as much of a “daunting experience” if they hadn’t already become so large from eating out so much in the first place. Like the other guy said it’s based on them continuing to want to do the thing that is causing the problem the article title references, but they become less and less able to do it...because they do it.

It’s daunting physically as far as fitting in chairs, but also daunting because they know it’s something that hurts them yet they do it anyway.

I think it makes perfect sense if you’re an evil asshole :messenger_winking:
 
Last edited:
Likes: KageyK
Aug 26, 2018
509
535
255
#21
Yeah I see these complaints always in airlines..."why do I have to pay for two seats, why do I need an extension belt its embaressing, why dont you just make seats bigger." I think nobody wants anorexic and as small as possible people just to fit more of them inside a plane,bus or cruise ship but asking for "acceptance" and change due to having a health issue which thanks god is not the majority of people, its ridiculous. Im not trying to be an asshole but I applaud fat shaming. Not in a violent way that someone should be scared of being fat but that is the push you need to get out of that rut.

At the age of 13 I got fat, neighbourhood kids made fun of me, in school my mates were getting dates and I was that ugly duckling in the corner, couldnt play basketball or football. So finally a 30yr old friend, building neighbour realized what was up, he was a gym freak and told me "if you want to play on my lates PC, you need to do 30 min home excercise every day at my place and run for 1 hour once a week with me". Being ridiculed from others and pushed by him to work out or get the fuck out, in less then a year I lost it all. By 15 I was perfectly fit, felt confident, felt amazing, relationships started flowing in.

You are not born fat, you made yourself fat and I dont care what acceptance you want, someone needs to slap you in the face and say NO, get off your ass and make yourself fit in the chair months later. Because if you want everything to cater towards you, you will never want to lose weight because then ull feel like everything is just perfect. Being fat you are messing up your knees, your blood vessels, your back and breathing, you are cutting your life short.

If anything, I would as a country give free gym membership with a trainer to every fat person so they wouldnt have an excuse anymore. 3 times a week, every single gym should have 1 hour free group classes only for the overweight.
 
Last edited:

嫩翼

so it's not nice
Apr 2, 2013
2,061
1,609
600
香港
#23
I have to say every time I go from Canada to the States, you guys amaze me.

I see lots of large people in Canada, like lots, but when I go down there it’s on a whole nother level. I’m seriously amazed at some of the shapes I see when visiting.
*nudge* 404 is Aussie.

Not that it matters. (y)
 
Feb 11, 2019
220
195
165
Limerick, Ireland
#28
How do you identify as fat? It doesn’t work that way.

“We are in a great cultural moment where people are talking about equity and inclusion, and size falls into that,”

This is a very dangerous line of thinking. Promoting and glorifying Obesity is not helping but harming these people. There really should be a push for healthy eating and nutrition education. All of the terrible additives and processed foods are killing people. Then the effects of this is glorified and accepted.

There are obvious conditions that cause obesity but there is a big swath that is poor lifestyle choices. This should not be praised.
I completely agree with you

I do think it goes too far when someone insults a far person.
I don't condone speaking positively about it but I don't condone being a jackass to someone either.

This is actually the same way I feel about politics funnily enough.
You know someone who votes Trump? Don't call them a racist bigot
You know someone who swings left? Don't call them a naive, SJW snowflake.

Funnily enough people don't like being insulted and it rarely makes anyone change their mind or change their lifestyle.
There are those out there with medical problems that make it extremely hard to lose weight but really when you glorify being fat you presude the person (Who is unhealthy) that they don't need to change.

This is dangerous but these people need to be educated not insulted.
 
Sep 24, 2014
124
102
295
Nope
#29
Actual scientific paper on why this is an issue:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4229150/
Many other putative contributors to the increase in obesity (eg, insufficient sleep, psychological stress, endocrine disruptors, medications, intrauterine and intergenerational effects, etc) have supportive evidence that is as compelling as, if not more compelling than, the evidence for the big 2.3,4 These nontraditional or new determinants of obesity influence energy input and output; overeating and reduced energy expenditure are perceived as “symptoms” and not as the root causes of the excess weight.
Approximately two-thirds of people who lose weight will regain it within 1 year, and almost all of them will regain it within 5 years.11 Although dieting (ie, caloric restriction) to lose weight is a difficult task, the maintenance of lost weight requires the patient to deploy even greater efforts. Rather than a simple lack of willpower, the relapse of most individuals to their previous weight after otherwise successful weight loss is largely driven by the coordinated actions of metabolic, neuroendocrine, autonomic, and behavioural changes that oppose the maintenance of reduced body
weight.12 The few individuals successful at maintaining weight loss (at least 13.6 kg for at least 1 year) generally have common behaviour and strategies that include consuming low-energy, low-fat diets; engaging in high levels of physical activity; consistent self-monitoring of body weight and food intake; eating breakfast regularly; and demonstrating a high level of dietary restraint.13 It is highly unlikely that some of this behaviour can be emulated by most of the population with excess weight. There is also concern that unhealthy weight control methods (eg, fasting, meal skipping, laxatives, diuretics, stimulants) might ultimately lead to a larger weight regain and pose a risk to both mental and physical health.
There is also new studies into why obese individuals can't keep it off linking it to pure genetics, in short even though they can loose the weight with diet and exercise temporarily, the hunger never goes away which is something a normal individual will never experience. So no matter how hard an obese person works, they will not escape their genetics, so yes they sorta are born that way. Exercise and moderation in diet is important for health, but not going to make someone with these severe weight issues loose fat. As someone who has regularly exercised with weightlifting my entire adult life, I can sympathize with them cause always having to use an isle seat on a plane so 1/3 of my shoulder width is hanging out to be hit by the damn drink cart, or heaven forbid I need to take a shit when in Japan, that's not an experience I want to relive contorting my torso whilst sitting with no crotchroom in those stalls.
 
Likes: Ailynn

Fbh

Member
Dec 6, 2013
10,256
2,064
580
#32
Actual scientific paper on why this is an issue:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4229150/

There is also new studies into why obese individuals can't keep it off linking it to pure genetics, in short even though they can loose the weight with diet and exercise temporarily, the hunger never goes away which is something a normal individual will never experience. So no matter how hard an obese person works, they will not escape their genetics, so yes they sorta are born that way. Exercise and moderation in diet is important for health, but not going to make someone with these severe weight issues loose fat. As someone who has regularly exercised with weightlifting my entire adult life, I can sympathize with them cause always having to use an isle seat on a plane so 1/3 of my shoulder width is hanging out to be hit by the damn drink cart, or heaven forbid I need to take a shit when in Japan, that's not an experience I want to relive contorting my torso whilst sitting with no crotchroom in those stalls.
I don't know. Your link isn't working but I'd need to see more concrete evidence and research results beyond just a few quotes.
I have a few family member who are doctors and I've talked about this with them in the past and from what I remember they told me that while there are genetic variables which can affect weight and our ability to loose it, the majority of of people who get to be morbidly obese (so not just overweight) didn't get there just because genetics.

And just on an anecdotal level I do know people that exercise regularly and are still overweight but I've never encountered anyone who follows a normal diet and does regular exercise and still got as fat as the person in the OP picture
 

Trojita

Rapid Response Threadmaker
Feb 9, 2009
35,723
90
1,220
#33
Eh these are the outspoken people that are demanding and want everything catered to them. Most fat people are probably mortified at causing issues in public, but of course the demanding person that flies around to eat at michelin restaurants as a hobby gets a story written about them.

Man you guys are harsh.
 
Feb 13, 2012
8,257
151
520
Canada
#34
Actual scientific paper on why this is an issue:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4229150/

There is also new studies into why obese individuals can't keep it off linking it to pure genetics, in short even though they can loose the weight with diet and exercise temporarily, the hunger never goes away which is something a normal individual will never experience. So no matter how hard an obese person works, they will not escape their genetics, so yes they sorta are born that way. Exercise and moderation in diet is important for health, but not going to make someone with these severe weight issues loose fat. As someone who has regularly exercised with weightlifting my entire adult life, I can sympathize with them cause always having to use an isle seat on a plane so 1/3 of my shoulder width is hanging out to be hit by the damn drink cart, or heaven forbid I need to take a shit when in Japan, that's not an experience I want to relive contorting my torso whilst sitting with no crotchroom in those stalls.
This is pure nonsense. Obesity has been steadily increasing in the US over the past few decades. People en mass didn't suddenly get obese genes where they just cannot lose weight.
Yes there are people who gain weight easier than others. Not every one has the same metabolism. But that is a difference of maybe 10 to 20lbs. Not 100 to 200lbs.
Show me a study on people 300lb+ with how many calories they eat every day and I guarantee you it will be far above a normal amount.
And of course many of these people regain the weight after they lose it. If they had some level of self control they would've never gotten to be so fat in the first place.
 
Aug 22, 2018
2,289
3,156
275
#35
I wonder why we don't see the same promotion of groups advocating for anorexia as we see for obesity? Given both conditions are unhealthy, and both are primarily caused by psychological issues, one would expect them to be treated similarly.
 
Jan 8, 2014
659
53
340
#36
To be blunt, why shouldn't most fat people feel ashamed of their weight? When I was 380 I was that way because I would literally drink half a gallon of milk a day along with half a dozen sugar sodas and gigantic helpings of everything. That was all my fault, and I was disgusting. I would probably have had a heart attack by now if I had not lost the weight, and my keto is probably the only thing that reversed my pre-diabetes or I would be dealing with insulin.

It seems like it is 90%+ overweight women pushing this fat acceptance, even though (as a man, and from other obese males I've heard talk about it) we all have those same issues. We feel like we are physically unattractive (nonspoilers: we are), like people are watching us (nonspoilers: they are), and that people don't think we have self-control (nonspoilers: they do, and we don't). Why is that is a bad thing?
Right on. I also lost weight and reversed a few medical issues by going Keto. I no longer have dandruff, heartburn, or snore.
 
Oct 2, 2017
36
26
110
#37
Being fat shouldn't be accepted. It is a legitimate health crisis across the world. I just don't see shaming them as an effective tool to get them to lose weight. More than likely they will need some professional help in trying to address the habits and mental processes that allowed them to gain so much weight in the first place.

I'm sure there are plenty of people who just need to stop eating so damn much. Just seems like there are also a lot of people who have some kind of mental issue that keeps them from succeeding that easily.
 
Apr 4, 2013
134
55
355
Dallas, TX
#40
I’m sure there’s a small minority of people with real genetic issues but I heavily doubt it would make them obese. That’s just being lazy and not following a healthy diet. If anything you would be slightly overweight, not morbidly obese.

A lot of the problem is that being so heavy has become normalized. Overweight is the new normal which skews people’s perception to not realize that most of us are actually obese.
 
Likes: hariseldon
Jan 27, 2018
2,304
2,607
290
#41
What's daunting is trying to pick something off those vast menus these days. Do you get the Carl’s Jr. ½ lb. Guacamole Bacon Thickburger with a side of McDonald's Big Breakfast with HotCakes? Or a Panera Bread Bread Bowl BBQ Chicken Mac and Cheese followed by a 24-piece Sonic Buffalo Boneless Wings? Plus just getting to all those places in one lunch break...
 
Last edited:
Apr 4, 2013
134
55
355
Dallas, TX
#42
What's daunting is trying to pick something off those vast menus these days. Do you get the Carl’s Jr. ½ lb. Guacamole Bacon Thickburger with a side of McDonald's Big Breakfast with HotCakes? Or a Panera Bread Bread Bowl BBQ Chicken Mac and Cheese followed by a 24-piece Sonic Buffalo Boneless Wings? Plus just getting to all those places in one lunch break...
This legit had me laugh out loud at work!
 

Aurelian

my friends call me "Cunty"
Feb 22, 2009
649
455
845
Ottawa, Canada
#43
It's complicated.

There are definitely people who just have poor habits and need to get their lives in gear. At the same time, there really are people with genetic conditions, or people whose medications or injuries contribute to the problem (I have a friend in that situation). Really, the main thing is to offer these people a modicum of respect, because you can't always determine the factors behind their weight just by looking.
 
Likes: *Nightwing
Oct 24, 2017
523
670
225
31
#44
It's complicated.

There are definitely people who just have poor habits and need to get their lives in gear. At the same time, there really are people with genetic conditions, or people whose medications or injuries contribute to the problem (I have a friend in that situation). Really, the main thing is to offer these people a modicum of respect, because you can't always determine the factors behind their weight just by looking.
What medical factors would cause someone to get so fat they cant fit in a booth? also not sure how an injury would cause that aswell. Lots of skinny people in wheelchairs
 

Aurelian

my friends call me "Cunty"
Feb 22, 2009
649
455
845
Ottawa, Canada
#45
What medical factors would cause someone to get so fat they cant fit in a booth? also not sure how an injury would cause that aswell. Lots of skinny people in wheelchairs
Medication that affects your metabolism, for example, or an inability to walk that compounds an existing weight issue. It happens -- it's not necessarily frequent, but not unheard of.
 

Woo-Fu

incest on the subway
Jan 2, 2007
13,527
530
1,120
#46
If I start getting fat I stop eating most things. Go two weeks with water, vitamins and steamed vegetables, if you don't lose weight then you might be an herbivore.

People who say they can't lose weight are people who are really saying they can't stop eating and can't start exercising. You're not plants, you don't have photosynthesis, you're not making that fat with water and sunlight for fuck's sake.

Fat people complaining they can't enjoy a trip to a restaurant are like drug addicts complaining that they can't enjoy a trip to the pharmacy.
 
Last edited: