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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|
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Hecatonchires Custom
Member
My last boyfriend decided he was gonna dump me after leaving town for 5 days without telling me. When he came back, we talked for a while and split up. I was legitimely feeling sad and cried a bit. He never came to pick up his stuff and I never saw him again.
Then I found out he cheated on me with a really effeminate sissy bitch multiple times, he lied to all of his college friends about me having a small dick and being filthy and unclean and openly made jokes about the fact that I cried when we broke and everybody laughed apparently.
Then he was suspended from college for cheating and had to drop out (karma's a bitch) and when he sent a message asking me Hey how you doin' "smiley face", I promptly told him to go die in a fire.
Do the same, Lucario.
Your ex ? An asshole. Don't bother with someone like him. The only way to be at peace is to leave him out of your life. I mean, come on, spreading rumors about you ? His new bf telling you to kill yourself ?! (this guy is an asshole too - and I'm pretty sure the law condemns such words). No, don't even bother, you're better off without someone so cruel/insane in your life. If you allow him to reach you again, you're just going to suffer. Don't fall for it. Don't try to get a vengeance either : you don't want to enter that circle.
Bel Marduk
Banned
Hecatonchires & Lucario you both did the right thing and like everyone else is saying these guys are not worth you time.. how fucking cruel and stupid can people be? i have never lied or spread rumors about an ex no matter how bad the break up was.. and never would although its been done to me several times. Life is much better without having to deal with sociopaths. Forget they ever existed.
GasProblem
Member
Fuck medical issues. Fuck 'em.
I want to meet someone and be in a relationship, I really do, but those medical issues are just always in the back of my mind and I don't think I can be close with someone untill they are gone. Will probably have surgery in august, and will be left with an open wound that will take around 10 weeks to heal and will require constant packing and wound care in the beginning couple of weeks. And the wound is not in a place you want it to be. Won't be able to sit for the first 1-2 weeks.
Just annoying seeing people around me getting in and out of relationships like it's nothing. And kind of depressing.
Tired of being alone, /sigh.
I want to meet someone and be in a relationship, I really do, but those medical issues are just always in the back of my mind and I don't think I can be close with someone untill they are gone. Will probably have surgery in august, and will be left with an open wound that will take around 10 weeks to heal and will require constant packing and wound care in the beginning couple of weeks. And the wound is not in a place you want it to be. Won't be able to sit for the first 1-2 weeks.
Just annoying seeing people around me getting in and out of relationships like it's nothing. And kind of depressing.
Tired of being alone, /sigh.
If you live somewhere outside of Boston or central maine, chances are I don't know you.
AceBandage
Banned
Damn man. Hope it all works out and you have a speedy recovery.
D
Deleted member 30609
Unconfirmed Member
Abscess?
GasProblem
Member
Pilonidal sinus.
Don't google it. Really
Already went to the hospital for it once, they cut it out and stitched it up, it came back. Next time they're cutting away a bit more and leaving the wound open so it can heal from the inside. Just read so much freaking horror stories about the healing process.
Pilonidal sinus.
Don't google it. Really
Already went to the hospital for it once, they cut it out and stitched it up, it came back. Next time they're cutting away a bit more and leaving the wound open so it can heal from the inside. Just read so much freaking horror stories about the healing process.
I got that - it sucks. I seem to be lucky in that I just had an anti-bacterial regime to go through. Will have to wait and see if it's truly gone though.
And yeah, it's going to be a bit of an impact on the dating scene. Especially if you've got the surgery since it makes sitting difficult. I can really sympathize and my biggest worry is that I'll have to get surgery too.
Pilonidal sinus.
Don't google it. Really
Already went to the hospital for it once, they cut it out and stitched it up, it came back. Next time they're cutting away a bit more and leaving the wound open so it can heal from the inside. Just read so much freaking horror stories about the healing process.
Been there, done that. Not fun. I had no problems healing, but they missed some or something, I still have a small lump and some pain sometimes.
Edit: Yeah, it's pretty common, especially among the more... manly... men.
Cosmic Bus
pristine morning snow
Hecatonchires said:
What was the purpose of adding this particular detail about the person he cheated with? It's like mentioning a crime and then pointing out oh, they were black too.
Sex is nice, but really overrated every time I do it. :|
*ahem* Story to tell here but you girls are bitching about shit no one cares about (read: description of people cheating with) to where I'm going to refrain. Tootles!
*ahem* Story to tell here but you girls are bitching about shit no one cares about (read: description of people cheating with) to where I'm going to refrain. Tootles!
I wouldn't read too much into it. Hecatonchires is rightly going to have some strong emotions over it so finding something to criticize the third party for is understandable.
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
Yeah, I got nothing against effeminate guys but that asshole knew of my existence and joined in on the good ol' fun after we broke up. I'm just fucking pissed at the guy is all.
So... Since I didn't really follow what's happening in the USA recently, what about gay marriage ? Is there going to be a vote in order to allow it (via a Federal Civil Law ? If I'm not mistaken, it's this kind of law that would be applied in all states, since the federal states have their own State Civil Law or something like that... I'm sorry, I'm not really familiar with the US legislation system) ? How does it look ? Are things going the wrong way, the right way ? The only thing I know is that Obama was in favor of same-sex union, and that California turned the possibility down... To be honest, I'm surprised that the issue isn't really discussed here (by "here", I mean in this very topic - I know that there are others topics on the subject on NeoGAF).
Well, how cynical are you?
At the moment, nothing is happening about gay marriage. Obama has just publicly announced his stance in favour for it. But it's mostly just a political statement at the moment in order to get his base rallied. There is no legislature being put forward to legalize it. It's more akin to a campaign promise without actually promising anything.
Bel Marduk
Banned
Gay marriage is a state issue at the moment due to a law called the Defense of Marriage act limiting the definition of marriage to a man and a woman federally although states can recognize it if they want. Obama's justice department has vowed not to use this law although its still on the books and will be until its overturned either by a vote from congress or a judicial ruling.
For example, I was married in New York. My husband and I have no legal rights as a couple in the state where we live (Florida) and our marriage is not recognized by the federal government... so we can't file taxes as a couple, buy a property jointly etc etc
A page late and all that, but is exploring some potential shared hobbies/interests/tastes not an option? You stress some degree of commonality in that regard, but earlier on you noted that you basically have one night of experience with the fellow. Could you perhaps be writing the book on this guy before you're even a chapter in?
Last I heard, distance doesn't mean you can't resemble someone.
Resentment, envy, bitchiness.
fuck gay life in Germany,
3rd date in a row with 3 differente guys in the last 3 months that I go home loveless and sexless after wonderful hours of talking to each other. You could say maybe my looks don't match my profile or whatever, but hell no, that's not it, people here are weird, I am suspecting it's cultural.
These people can't fucking bond, I would like to know what the hell is in their heads.
3rd date in a row with 3 differente guys in the last 3 months that I go home loveless and sexless after wonderful hours of talking to each other. You could say maybe my looks don't match my profile or whatever, but hell no, that's not it, people here are weird, I am suspecting it's cultural.
These people can't fucking bond, I would like to know what the hell is in their heads.
You expect sex or at least kissing on the first date and if that doesn't happen, you move on to the next guy instead of trying to set up a second date. You expect people to bond after a few hours of conversation. Yeah, I'd say the problem lies with you.
RPGCrazied
Member
Nah. Texas, or at least where I am its pretty fucked too. Doesn't matter if you have an awesome personality. If you don't have a nice body or at least look like a twink, nobody here wants a thing to do with you.
I hope one day I can leave this place.
I agree with Stabbie. When the issue came up in this very thread, you'd be hard pressed to find anyone that would be willing to have sex on a first date. If you're just looking for hook-ups isn't there something like Grindr in Germany? And just out of curiosity but where are you originally from sphinx?
Of course, if you're saying they aren't even agreeing to a second date, then I can understand the frustration.
No, they just don't know what the fuck they want. They are people that have been single for so long that they don't know if it's worth it to take further steps and turn it into something.
When I date, I expect either:
.- hey it was nice but I don't think we are a match, if was nice having a drink with you though.
.- I'd like to ge to know you better, how about going for lunch next weekend?
and in both cases, it's o.k if sex or kissing/cuddling takes place but I don't demand it.
I don't get neither of those scenarios and it annoys me, is it too much to ask for them to tell me what they think?????? that's all I ask. Anything would do " you are hot but as a person, not quite my type" or the other way around. Something.
the worst part is, that I want to feel wanted or that someone likes me, I don't mind no sex in a first date or maybe even later but if someone said, "I think you are charming" or "You have nice eyes" or "I like your laugh" that would make my day and yes I do say stuff like that when I feel like it, stuff like " after seeing you live, I can confirm you are very attractive in person, not just in picture", there I am giving a step.
what do I get in return? crickets*.. what, they think they'll hurt me if they say, they didn't like me? fucking morons. They just make everything harder for all of us. I also get to reject people all the time and I ALWAYS get a thank you for saying it the way it is.
oh and I am Mexican
dragonlife
Member
Dude, you are so cute. Unfortunately your room is nothing compared to how mine can get sometimes.
agreed
very cute guy. but do your room once in a while, lol
I always thought you were from Brazil.
One more to add to the list
why brazil? I thought you were American with Latino/Mexican roots. Is that so, or are you a Mexican in Mexico?
No, they just don't know what the fuck they want. They are people that have been single for so long that they don't know if it's worth it to take further steps and turn it into something.
When I date, I expect either:
.- hey it was nice but I don't think we are a match, if was nice having a drink with you though.
.- I'd like to ge to know you better, how about going for lunch next weekend?
and in both cases, it's o.k if sex or kissing/cuddling takes place but I don't demand it.
I don't get neither of those scenarios and it annoys me, is it too much to ask for them to tell me what they think?????? that's all I ask. Anything would do " you are hot but as a person, not quite my type" or the other way around. Something.
the worst part is, that I want to feel wanted or that someone likes me, I don't mind no sex in a first date or maybe even later but if someone said, "I think you are charming" or "You have nice eyes" or "I like your laugh" that would make my day and yes I do say stuff like that when I feel like it, stuff like " after seeing you live, I can confirm you are very attractive in person, not just in picture", there I am giving a step.
what do I get in return? crickets*.. what, they think they'll hurt me if they say, they didn't like me? fucking morons. They just make everything harder for all of us. I also get to reject people all the time and I ALWAYS get a thank you for saying it the way it is.
oh and I am Mexican
So what exactly happens? They just never contact you ever again? Do you offer a second date? How do they respond?
I don't know. Probably some old post from you + when you told us about how you moved to Germany + gaming side. I always had that idea.
I am a Mexican in Mexico, the others are Fakexicans
Why American with Latin roots?
it goes like this.
Guy 1: I like your profile let's meet somewhere!
Guy 2: sure!
*hours chatting about this and that, smiles, eyes, comments that can be interpreted as showing interest, mood is perfect,
him: O.k it's getting late, I'll go home
me: Sure! it would be nice to meet again.
him: sure! (...?)
I send SMS, "thanks for the night, I really enjoyed it and I think your are really cute", I get a response like " yeah, sure! it was very nice! "
I think.. "o.k...I dont mind if he didn't like me but there is not enough info to confirm anything either way, so let's see"
after that is random annoying shit no matter what I say or what I try, one of the guys sends me an icon "I think about you" but otherwise disappears and doesn't do anything to show interest and the other one visited my profile exclusively to say "hi" after it was clear he didn't give a fuck about me, he was almost a bit rude and the guy from yesterday, God knows what he's thinking, but after drinking at a br, he came all the way to my apartment, I offered wine, he was in my kitchen, and all of a sudden he said "Ok Ill go", I send a SMS saying, " Maybe I should have offered you my bed" (cause he looked tired) and what is his answer to the message? "It was nice that we had an exchange of ideas and a nice chat and that hug when I went home was nice"... THE FUCK??? what is that for an answer??? I expect " NO, I won't go to your bed, neither alone or with you" or " Yeah, would have been nice, maybe later on".
Am I wrong? I'd like some help here cause I don't understand these guys.
II am a Mexican in Mexico, the others are Fakexicans
Why American with Latin roots?
because you once said you have problems finding people for dates where you live (something like that, not sure what the issue is) and in Mexico isn't hard to find a date, so I thought you were an American with Mexican parents in some lost town in Texas or New Mexico with little chances to get to know people. By the way, isn't Fernoca another mexican gay?
Maybe they just like you as a friend. I moved to a new city three months ago and I have gone out with 6 different guys more than once (well 1 of them ended up being completely cray cray and haven't seen him since the only date we had) and I haven't done anything with them and it's not really a big deal.
Maybe you can make a move when you are talking or something. Texting is not the same and it might me misunderstood.
It is hard to find a date in the part of MX where I live (north, under Arizona), but I stopped caring about that some time ago
fernoca is from Puerto Rico.
what's your city/country? sounds like a thing with white guys, that's what I am suspecting at least.
my problem is also that when I see a picture, I know I will like that guy, speaking about sexual attraction only, I very very rarely change my mind upon meeting and that only happens when the pictures were too old.
these guys all sent me icons like "Interesting" "Cute" sometimes even "hot" and they don't make their move! I am the one liking them in the end and they just play the "yeah, no, don't know" card.
you are right in the second bolded sentence, the guy from yesterday was a 6 feet tall redhead, very cute and friendly, a tiny bit effemniate and I suspect he might have been waiting for the man (me) to bring him to bed
...I definitely am, though I base that on a ton of chatting (text/SMS) over the last year or so, aside from the one night. I really do feel as if I can read the man well, in that regard.
But yeah, you're right. I need (and want!) to spend some time with him in situations I know won't get out of control (and lead to sex or romance), and just hang, enjoy each others' company, and see what's there. I just hate having to find a way to make it clear that I just want to hang (with my mind totally open to more!), instead of labeling it a 'date' right off the bat, which he seems eager to do. A 'date' automatically has a pile of expectations for either party. Or both.
I am mexican too :lol but I'm in Mexico City. Maybe you should just go out with a different mindset and it might be less frustrating. I always go out thinking about wanting to meet new people in this city so I have not been picky with the guys I've been dating. I usually like nerdy guys around my age (26) but for some reason I have a lot of "luck" with thirty-something guys. lol.what's your city/country? sounds like a thing with white guys, that's what I am suspecting at least.
my problem is also that when I see a picture, I know I will like that guy, speaking about sexual attraction only, I very very rarely change my mind upon meeting and that only happens when the pictures were too old.
these guys all sent me icons like "Interesting" "Cute" sometimes even "hot" and they don't make their move! I am the one liking them in the end and they just play the "yeah, no, don't know" card.
you are right in the second bolded, the guy from yesterday was a 6 feet tall redhead, very cute and friendly, a tiny bit effemniate and I suspect he might have been waiting for the man (me) to bring him to bed
I added a porn star I really like onto twitter. (Chase young) Had a nice convo with him and he was really nice. He really is adorable...but Helix keeps pushing him into these dungeon sets lately with skinnier guys and more spank stuff.
Ah well nothing beat watching him do the cinnamon challenge
Ah well nothing beat watching him do the cinnamon challenge
electroplankton
Banned
I added a porn star I really like onto twitter. (Chase young) Had a nice convo with him and he was really nice. He really is adorable...but Helix keeps pushing him into these dungeon sets lately with skinnier guys and more spank stuff.
Ah well nothing beat watching him do the cinnamon challenge
Always wondered how the sexual life of a porn star might be.
after longass messages with another guy I've never met (and never will cause I am disappointed already), I asked for his last name, of course giving mine in the same sentence.
he got all worked up saying "why the hell is that important?! I don't even know you!, we haven't had a telephone call! if we ever meet I can tell you."
I answered calmly and friendly but I actually thought "fuck this", am I wrong? I am not sure now but that's what I thought.
he got all worked up saying "why the hell is that important?! I don't even know you!, we haven't had a telephone call! if we ever meet I can tell you."
I answered calmly and friendly but I actually thought "fuck this", am I wrong? I am not sure now but that's what I thought.
dragonlife
Member
Stick to first names. Asking for a last name early on can be a bit much.
might be but it's the sum of all the parts that disappoints me... if he's is so freaking scared of sharing any real info with anyone, how are we supposed to get to know each other?
example, he said he had a small tatoo in his right forearm, I asked what design he had and ignored the question.
then, His stats doesn't match the pictures cause he looks fit in them but according to the stats he has some overweight. I ask (very friendly and polite and all) for a pic with his current appearance and I get "yeah, somtime down the line"...
I mean... come on. he already has a minus point by smoking and lives like, don't know, hours away from here...
he is a kind guy, but I truly believe he is doing it wrong.
Guy without an experience here, but aren't you a little bit straightforward? You were expecting him to either jump to your bed or say "fuck you!" and consider everything in-between as something bad. It's the first date and of course some people will be a little bit awkward and undecided whether they want to spent the rest of the life (or at least night) with you or leave you forever alone. It doesn't mean they don't like you; maybe those guys just can't easily define and/or express their feelings or are simply shy.
If I got a message saying "maybe I should have offered you my bed" I wouldn't know what to say and I'd answer something like that too. It's a weird thing to say.
Everything you said so far makes it seem like you're only after sex. That may not be the case, but it's probably what you make your dates think.
Asking for a last name isn't weird at all, I'm not sure if its a recent thing with smart phones or what but everyone I know is pretty keen on keeping their contact lists organized.
I have about half a dozen Jasons, 8 shawns and multiples of other names as well in my phone at the moment. Unless your first name is very unique (like Balmafuma or Radamanthus unique) I'm going to ask for your surname. There's really nothing to it.
In other news I'm really tempted on ordering a cock sling. And I guess if I don't like it i'm sure my BF will give it a go
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I have about half a dozen Jasons, 8 shawns and multiples of other names as well in my phone at the moment. Unless your first name is very unique (like Balmafuma or Radamanthus unique) I'm going to ask for your surname. There's really nothing to it.
In other news I'm really tempted on ordering a cock sling. And I guess if I don't like it i'm sure my BF will give it a go
(the leather cock ring I got a few months ago looks AMAZING on him)
I'm still not following that image.
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