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[Omegasquash]

I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, ask me when I'm working, etc)
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming to me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely disappointed, almost embarrassed/upset, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ?

If just for the sake of closure and your own micro-sanity, yes. A creative way around it is to pick a night when you know you'll be free, and just say something like "hey, give me a call X night, I've got some free time." If she responds in the affirmative and doesn't call, take the hint. If she says no, then don't even respond to her comings on to you. Put the ball in her court, and if she doesn't play, then move along. At least you've got a pretty office flirty thang to make the day better on the job.

 

[ShockingAlberto]

probably not the right place to post this, but relevant (from the funny pic thread):

It feels that way, but never really is. It's always more simple or more complicated, in either a good or bad way ^_^

Life isn't so straight forward like that, which is awesome.

Alternatively:

 

[LordPhoque]

(edited version for the new page)
I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.

 

[ShockingAlberto]

(edited version for the new page)
I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.

It's possible she decided against the date, but it seems more likely she's either been too busy (for reasons she doesn't want to disclose) or has been mulling it over.

Whenever I've been flirting with someone and then she decided not to date me, the flirting just straight up stops. That it's continuing is not a guarantee she's still interested, but I'd say it's more than likely.

 

[Shao Kahn Brewing a Stew]

Alternatively:

In lalaland maybe.

Rule: Be the sweet guy in a jerk's clothing.

 

[The Elite]

In lalaland maybe.

Rule: Be the sweet guy in a jerk's clothing.

No way I'm wearing a backwards hat.

 

[jasonng]

(edited version for the new page)
I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.

Just because she's got your number doesn't mean she still doesn't want you to ask her out. Ask her out again, tell her you want to check out _____ and it'll be cool for her to keep you company. Then ask for her number again. Sometimes girls want you to do the planning.

 

[Ultima_5]

(edited version for the new page)
I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.

Yeah? Why don't you just say next time you see her "so how about that date?"

She could have simply forgotten that you don't have her number and has been waiting for you.

 

[Minamu]

"Since you wanted to see me tomorrow, how about going on that date then?"

 

[RelentlessRolento]

Alternatively:

good man ^_^

surprisingly this works 50% of the time. You just have to risk it.

 

[threenote]

Nvm I'm not giving her flowers. Haha what was I thinking?

 

[Atramental]

My positive outlook on life and relationships just got demolished today. Then again, this isn't the first time this has happened

To start off, today was my first day back at Uni from Christmas break. I've got new classes, new classmates, and new teachers.

I look like a fucking 30 year old druggie who just got back into college. People my age (21) don't want to talk to me at all. They just look at me and cringe. Even the girl I know from my high school doesn't want to hold a conversation with me for too long because I've changed so fucking much.

God, I'm so fucked...

I think I should just hold off on thinking about relationships until I've gotten myself... sorted out? I don't fucking know anymore.

Help?

 

[-PXG-]

My positive outlook on life and relationships just got demolished today. Then again, this isn't the first time this has happened

To start off, today was my first day back at Uni from Christmas break. I've got new classes, new classmates, and new teachers.

I look like a fucking 30 year old druggie who just got back into college. People my age (21) don't want to talk to me at all. They just look at me and cringe. Even the girl I know from my high school doesn't want to hold a conversation with me for too long because I've changed so fucking much.

God, I'm so fucked...

I think I should just hold off on thinking about relationships until I've gotten myself... sorted out? I don't fucking know anymore.

Help?

I highly doubt this is true. You're imagining shit or just blowing things way out of proportion.

 

[Atramental]

I highly doubt this is true. You're imagining shit or just blowing things way out of proportion.

Maybe it's this shitty weather that's effecting my mood and therefore effecting my perceptions.

I don't know.

Where I live it's been nothing but dark grey overcast skies for a couple of days now.

 

[ShockingAlberto]

Why would you say you've changed so dramatically?

 

[TheSchwab_7]

I highly doubt this is true. You're imagining shit or just blowing things way out of proportion.

I'm 21, I'll talk to you PXG

 

[Furio53]

Maybe it's this shitty weather that's effecting my mood and therefore effecting my perceptions.

I don't know.

Where I live it's been nothing but dark grey overcast skies for a couple of days now.

I think advice here has been pretty universal when it comes to bettering yourself.
Make sure you are happy with who you are, secure and confident in the person you are. Then the other stuff is icing on the cake. Women are not the end all means to our happiness, and it takes time to realize that.
I'm kind of at the point now where I'm not sure if I want to be dating, because I've got a lot going on, and I need to work on myself a little and get back into shape and feeling good about myself.
There's nothing wrong with that at all, IMO. So make sure you put less reliance on these girls and other people and their thoughts on you, and put more reliance on yourself by becoming the person you want to be.

 

[Atramental]

I think advice here has been pretty universal when it comes to bettering yourself.
Make sure you are happy with who you are, secure and confident in the person you are. Then the other stuff is icing on the cake. Women are not the end all means to our happiness, and it takes time to realize that.
I'm kind of at the point now where I'm not sure if I want to be dating, because I've got a lot going on, and I need to work on myself a little and get back into shape and feeling good about myself.
There's nothing wrong with that at all, IMO. So make sure you put less reliance on these girls and other people and their thoughts on you, and put more reliance on yourself by becoming the person you want to be.

Then that settles it.

I'll improve myself to the point in which I can no longer rationalize my self-loathing.

Why would you say you've changed so dramatically?

Back in high school I used to be much more outgoing and better looking.

Now I'm a nervous wreck half the time and psychically I look worn out.

 

[Furio53]

Then that settles it.

I'll improve myself to the point in which I can no longer rationalize my self-loathing.



Back in high school I used to be much more outgoing and better looking.

Now I'm a nervous wreck half the time and psychically I look worn out.

Good man. Don't keep agonizing over trivial things. they might seem big to you, but you'd surprised what can happen if you take 8 weeks, work out, eat right, do stuff that makes you laugh, watch movies that inspire you, do things to push your own boundaries and out of your comfort zone. I've seen your posts previously, and it sounds like you've been through a lot recently. It sounds like you have a confidence problem right now. This can be fixed. Remember that. When you feel good about yourself, you quit worrying about what people think of you when you're out and about. It's pretty remarkable.

 

[jadedm17]

So I serve tables at TGI Fridays currently.

Over the last 2 days I've had 3 girls leave me their number - 1 gave her number to the server taking care of her on Saturday night, and I had a table of 3 girls where 2 left their number on Sunday night. Now I've had this happen before but I've never pursued anything. But as the server who took care of the girl on Saturday night said, it takes a lot of courage - which I find sexy as hell - for a girl to do that. So here's my questions :

-How should I go about this? Should I set up a date? Probably something casual like coffee.

-I've had this exact situation before : Table of 3, 2 leave their number. How do I go about calling one without feeling like a jerk for not calling the other? Do I set up something with both? At the same day? Same time? It'd make for an interesting experience and future story if they didn't find out until it happened.*

*I'd never do that, I just like to fantasize about what being "that guy" is like.

 

[lawlohwhat]

(edited version for the new page)
I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.

I think you've done the right thing so far. Some people are super flakey by nature and will drag things out for whatever reason(s). She might still be involved with someone, humoring other options, or just plain too busy to see you.

There's really no need to mention that you were frustrated with it. The only thing that can do is put her in a defensive position where she can try to justify her actions with whatever excuse she can come up with. You might want to poke fun at her for it in a lighthearted way if the opportunity comes up. Don't sweat it though, this happens all the time!

 

[number47]

just a overall post for those dating or trying to date. get rid of your oneitis. you got one number.great.aim for two numbers now.

as for =PXG-. great for you. have more fun with friends. maybe take it outside and be the mayor at a bar,then see what happens.((Then again that might end in a ONS,but at least it could lead to something))

 

[Bam Bam Baklava]

My positive outlook on life and relationships just got demolished today. Then again, this isn't the first time this has happened

To start off, today was my first day back at Uni from Christmas break. I've got new classes, new classmates, and new teachers.

I look like a fucking 30 year old druggie who just got back into college. People my age (21) don't want to talk to me at all. They just look at me and cringe. Even the girl I know from my high school doesn't want to hold a conversation with me for too long because I've changed so fucking much.

God, I'm so fucked...

I think I should just hold off on thinking about relationships until I've gotten myself... sorted out? I don't fucking know anymore.

Help?

I feel where you're coming from man. First day at school and all the girls were acting stuck up or uninterested in anything about me. The guys were cool and I got along with them just great but all I heard from girls were judging bullshit "oh you look too old, oh you're too tall, blah blah". I'm a pretty light hearted guy in class and I joke around so they think I'm stupid or not mature but then if I keep to myself and act mature/smart then I'm a nerd or weird or some nonsense. I mean I really am trying given some of the adversities I've faced in life but I can't just make confidence out of thin air and when I just hear this crap constantly it brings me down. Sometimes I wonder what it would feel like just for a day to be like a super good looking guy that was good at sports or something...the world must just be a different place for them.

 

[number47]

I feel where you're coming from man. First day at school and all the girls were acting stuck up or uninterested in anything about me. The guys were cool and I got along with them just great but all I heard from girls were judging bullshit "oh you look too old, oh you're too tall, blah blah". I'm a pretty light hearted guy in class and I joke around so they think I'm stupid or not mature but then if I keep to myself and act mature/smart then I'm a nerd or weird or some nonsense. I mean I really am trying given some of the adversities I've faced in life but I can't just make confidence out of thin air and when I just hear this crap constantly it brings me down. Sometimes I wonder what it would feel like just for a day to be like a super good looking guy that was good at sports or something...the world must just be a different place for them.

why listen to those who are so negative. "you're too tall" "you're too old" ...really,you can't be attracted to those who judge basic physical traits. as for confidence out of thin air. you shouldn't be embarrassed that you are a nerd. THIS IS NEOGAF. WE ARE ALL NERDS. wear like a badge of honor (i think I'm saying that wrong.) if anything,be proud of your hobbies.and ill let soultron take it from here or something.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

I feel where you're coming from man. First day at school and all the girls were acting stuck up or uninterested in anything about me. The guys were cool and I got along with them just great but all I heard from girls were judging bullshit "oh you look too old, oh you're too tall, blah blah". I'm a pretty light hearted guy in class and I joke around so they think I'm stupid or not mature but then if I keep to myself and act mature/smart then I'm a nerd or weird or some nonsense. I mean I really am trying given some of the adversities I've faced in life but I can't just make confidence out of thin air and when I just hear this crap constantly it brings me down. Sometimes I wonder what it would feel like just for a day to be like a super good looking guy that was good at sports or something...the world must just be a different place for them.

You can be Brad Pitt but if you have no personality or self-esteem you're not getting anywhere. You'd only attract the vapid shallow girls, and is that what you really want?

 

[jadedm17]

I feel where you're coming from man. First day at school and all the girls were acting stuck up or uninterested in anything about me. The guys were cool and I got along with them just great but all I heard from girls were judging bullshit "oh you look too old, oh you're too tall, blah blah". I'm a pretty light hearted guy in class and I joke around so they think I'm stupid or not mature but then if I keep to myself and act mature/smart then I'm a nerd or weird or some nonsense. I mean I really am trying given some of the adversities I've faced in life but I can't just make confidence out of thin air and when I just hear this crap constantly it brings me down. Sometimes I wonder what it would feel like just for a day to be like a super good looking guy that was good at sports or something...the world must just be a different place for them.

Yea, I feel the same, but as posted before me it'd be harder to find geniune girls. Personality is key.

 

[Bam Bam Baklava]

why listen to those who are so negative. "you're too tall" "you're too old" ...really,you can't be attracted to those who judge basic physical traits. as for confidence out of thin air. you shouldn't be embarrassed that you are a nerd. THIS IS NEOGAF. WE ARE ALL NERDS. wear like a badge of honor (i think I'm saying that wrong.) if anything,be proud of your hobbies.and ill let soultron take it from here or something.

I understand what you're trying to say. I'm still 21 but I have full facial hair that you can see even when I shave and pretty developed features in my face whereas a lot of the other guys around here seem to have like little to no facial hair and still boyish features. Either way it just bugs me how I try to be myself and keep my personality and I keep hearing about how there are people out there who look beyond that stuff and then I go out there and just meet a bunch of shallow people who treat me like I'm an outsider. I don't really have much of a choice but to keep trying and I always will try but I can't help but feel like I'm running out of time and nothing seems to ever really change. I've never really wanted to be a stud or anything, I think I accepted I won't be that a long time ago, but it seems like opportunities for me come once in a long while.

 

[Moussi]

First day of the new semester for Uni for me was great. Talked to a bunch of cute girls, looks like I'm going to meet some more as well. However, This one girl I knew from high school but never talked to her much showed up to one of my classes. She looked amazing, she sat on the other side of the room. We made eye contact and she smiled, I waved and shouted across the room for her to come sit next to me. We talked, and by the end of the day as she was waiting for her bus, we continued to talk and I asked "Do you have a phone?" she pulled it out and we exchanged numbers. Told her to text me if she ever wants to chill with me.

Btw I'm an average looking guy that is very proud of his nerdiness. Nerd is the new cool if pulled off correctly guys. Chicks dig guys with brains. All you need is confidence, back in the day I never would have done any of this. Exchanging numbers after meeting for the first time and talking for about 15 minutes is risky. However, with confidence it seemed like the natural thing to do.

 

[Bam Bam Baklava]

You can be Brad Pitt but if you have no personality or self-esteem you're not getting anywhere. You'd only attract the vapid shallow girls, and is that what you really want?

Yeah but I'm a 21 year old in college in a place that is notorious for being vain and material. Even the unattractive girls here are vapid and shallow. I'd take Brad Pitt if I had to live here for the rest of my life...either that or maybe some rich guy.

 

[LogicStep]

Man I want some advice on a situation I'm in but I don't want to post my whole story here which would include important details for any advice to be given. I'm probably over thinking and over analyzing things... Just feels really weird and scary posting my personal shit on the internet where there is a chance that someone might stumble upon it even if my name isn't attached to it. Even just writing this post was weird. -_- sorry for being retarded.

 

[-PXG-]

I'm 21, I'll talk to you PXG

PM me if you want.

So I serve tables at TGI Fridays currently.

Over the last 2 days I've had 3 girls leave me their number - 1 gave her number to the server taking care of her on Saturday night, and I had a table of 3 girls where 2 left their number on Sunday night. Now I've had this happen before but I've never pursued anything. But as the server who took care of the girl on Saturday night said, it takes a lot of courage - which I find sexy as hell - for a girl to do that. So here's my questions :

-How should I go about this? Should I set up a date? Probably something casual like coffee.

-I've had this exact situation before : Table of 3, 2 leave their number. How do I go about calling one without feeling like a jerk for not calling the other? Do I set up something with both? At the same day? Same time? It'd make for an interesting experience and future story if they didn't find out until it happened.*

*I'd never do that, I just like to fantasize about what being "that guy" is like.

Yeah, those "inferno" boneless wings, they ain't hot. They're sour as fuck and give me the shits.

Oh and girls love dat nasty ass spinach dip for some reason.

 

[threenote]

Another success today. We were making out and I told her I have a lot of feelings for her since she asked. I asked her how she was feeling, and she said she had a lot of feelings and that she likes me. I had to drag it out of her though. She's very shy.

I'm like the anti-PUA.

 

[NihonTiger90]

Now see, the shy thing might be playing into it, too, threenote. One of the girls I've been going back and forth with is painfully shy and is simultaneously excited and nervous about meeting up. So much so ... I still can't get an exact date hammered down and it's killing her chances with me. D:

 

[threenote]

Now see, the shy thing might be playing into it, too, threenote. One of the girls I've been going back and forth with is painfully shy and is simultaneously excited and nervous about meeting up. So much so ... I still can't get an exact date hammered down and it's killing her chances with me. D:

Wow that's really unusual, is she really insecure? I would move on if I were you...unless you really see potential there. My girl is always up for hanging out, she's just always late to our dates. But I'm guessing it's because she takes forever to get ready.


Our goodbye kiss tonight was an hour long, we literally couldn't get enough Of each other and she said so herself.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

Yeah but I'm a 21 year old in college in a place that is notorious for being vain and material. Even the unattractive girls here are vapid and shallow. I'd take Brad Pitt if I had to live here for the rest of my life...either that or maybe some rich guy.

Is this a fact or is this what you've determined through observation? If I may ask, what is your social situation like? Seems to me like you're jealous of the attention others are getting.

Have you joined any clubs or study groups? Even doing something like studying in the library rather than your dorm room can help you meet people.

Now see, the shy thing might be playing into it, too, threenote. One of the girls I've been going back and forth with is painfully shy and is simultaneously excited and nervous about meeting up. So much so ... I still can't get an exact date hammered down and it's killing her chances with me. D:

She continues being shy because you continue to let her have her way. Is she saying "I don't know... we'll see." and you respond with "Well let me know!"? If you keep putting the ball in her court but continue to give her attention she won't commit. It doesn't mean she doesn't like you, but she doesn't have to try as hard to appease you.

Start cutting her off and see what happens. Alternatively, pick a date and stick with it no matter what. See how she responds.

 

[Bam Bam Baklava]

Is this a fact or is this what you've determined through observation? If I may ask, what is your social situation like? Seems to me like you're jealous of the attention others are getting.

Have you joined any clubs or study groups? Even doing something like studying in the library rather than your dorm room can help you meet people.

It's probably less of a fact than I make it out to be but still extremely prevalent. My social life is average at this point but it could be a lot better and I'm working on it. I looked into joining clubs or something but this is a community college so the clubs are not too hot. Maybe I am jealous, who knows, but I think it stems from not being able to understand why I seem to be stuck this way. For instance today the professor put us in groups and I was in a group with 3 other girls. I was involved in the group fully, not in my own corner being alone or anything and yet all 3 girls decide to exchange info while not one seems to want my info. It's basically been like this for a while now, they might not dislike me or be put off by me at all but at the same time I don't think there's any want or need to be around me, I'm just there.

Meanwhile I got a friend who is about the same as me when it comes to personality but he looks better, drives a better car, and plays on a team for the school and he gets more girls. Sure he might act a little cooler than me but for the most part we are pretty similar. I mean that's the just way life is if you think about it but sometimes I see guys defying the odds and I come on here looking for advice or ideas and to share my story to see if I'm doing something wrong.

 

[greenry]

Now see, the shy thing might be playing into it, too, threenote. One of the girls I've been going back and forth with is painfully shy and is simultaneously excited and nervous about meeting up. So much so ... I still can't get an exact date hammered down and it's killing her chances with me. D:

Shy or not, if she wanted to go on a date with you, she would. You've said that same saying several times now, "killing her chances with me". But why isn't her chances already dead? Have a little respect for yourself and don't let her string you along.

 

[greenry]

So I serve tables at TGI Fridays currently.

Over the last 2 days I've had 3 girls leave me their number - 1 gave her number to the server taking care of her on Saturday night, and I had a table of 3 girls where 2 left their number on Sunday night. Now I've had this happen before but I've never pursued anything. But as the server who took care of the girl on Saturday night said, it takes a lot of courage - which I find sexy as hell - for a girl to do that. So here's my questions :

-How should I go about this? Should I set up a date? Probably something casual like coffee.

-I've had this exact situation before : Table of 3, 2 leave their number. How do I go about calling one without feeling like a jerk for not calling the other? Do I set up something with both? At the same day? Same time? It'd make for an interesting experience and future story if they didn't find out until it happened.*

*I'd never do that, I just like to fantasize about what being "that guy" is like.

They gave you their numbers. If you found them attractive then setup a date and see if they are interesting or not. Who cares if you like one and not the other, the girl you picked won't think you are a dick.

 

[NihonTiger90]

Yeah, screw it. I'm done with this girl. You guys are right. Her loss, not mine.

 

[RelentlessRolento]

http://www.menagea3.net/strips-ma3/crossed_a_line


Kinda sums up the last month for me with that girl cept instead of sex it's was intense makeout and cuddling. I learned alot that month:

- I am a damn good lover (I surprised myself to be honest, plus it was easier than I expected)
- The loss of affection after was a bit rough, but before our on again-off again thing happened I worked with myself to not stress over small things and learned to move on
- I love biting and scratching now
- I don't focus on a girl now until I feel a good response pop up after time



It's going to hit about a year since I lost my virginity (again, lost it in a week long relationship that ended on a good note) and, though it might sound shallow, I miss just being able to have some affection/sex. It's a damn good ego/confidence boost.

My hat tips to all you looking for that love as well as those who've found it. Keep going and don't let your head down.

The wait will be worth it; just man up in the mean time and be better than you were ^_^

 

[LordPhoque]

Thanks for the answers guys. I think I won't do anything, I did my part as far as I'm concerned, whatever her reasons are I don't really care at the end, I don't need any explanations and she would have contacted me if she wanted to.

 

[overcast]

Alternatively:

Worked for me. Regardless of how corny it may be.

 

[jasonng]

Thanks for the answers guys. I think I won't do anything, I did my part as far as I'm concerned, whatever her reasons are I don't really care at the end, I don't need any explanations and she would have contacted me if she wanted to.

It takes two seconds to ask her out again, then you can move on one way or the other.

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

It's probably less of a fact than I make it out to be but still extremely prevalent. My social life is average at this point but it could be a lot better and I'm working on it. I looked into joining clubs or something but this is a community college so the clubs are not too hot. Maybe I am jealous, who knows, but I think it stems from not being able to understand why I seem to be stuck this way. For instance today the professor put us in groups and I was in a group with 3 other girls. I was involved in the group fully, not in my own corner being alone or anything and yet all 3 girls decide to exchange info while not one seems to want my info. It's basically been like this for a while now, they might not dislike me or be put off by me at all but at the same time I don't think there's any want or need to be around me, I'm just there.

Meanwhile I got a friend who is about the same as me when it comes to personality but he looks better, drives a better car, and plays on a team for the school and he gets more girls. Sure he might act a little cooler than me but for the most part we are pretty similar. I mean that's the just way life is if you think about it but sometimes I see guys defying the odds and I come on here looking for advice or ideas and to share my story to see if I'm doing something wrong.

Regarding the group: from a purely social standpoint girls will "stick together", which is why it isn't always an optimal situation to be the only guy in a group. Did you try to get their info, perhaps jokingly saying "what am I? Chopped liver?" or just straight up asking to exchange numbers? Instead of sitting back and thinking "why won't they talk to me or notice me" just go ahead and ask. Be pro-active. If they don't show interest at first, make yourself interesting and that'll make them interested. Next time you see those girls, make an effort to maybe sit near one of them and remind them of who you are. "Hey remember me, we were working on so-and-so last class".

As for your friend, I don't think he compares himself to you. Be your own person. Maybe he has a more positive attitude which translates to more success.

 

[MTE]

Just got a text from a girl I'd seen twice now. Just friends, it seems. She says it was all she was looking for (we met online) but who knows. I'll probably keep in touch, but not nearly as much.
Oh well, already have a date set for tonight with another girl. Moving on! I hope can man up and make something, anything, happen. Wish me luck

 

[Miguel]

I want to get the girl something for our 11th date... bday is 11/11, so anything having to to with 11 she goes crazy over. I was thinking flowers? Not roses, not sure what though. I would do origami "somesortofflower", pink most likely ...but I used up the origami card already. It wouldn't hurt to use it again I suppose. Last time it was just a penguin.

 

[Jamesfrom818]

Why are so many of the awesome OkCupid girls in LA vegetarian or vegans? So much disappointment.

 

[Combine]

I think advice here has been pretty universal when it comes to bettering yourself. Make sure you are happy with who you are, secure and confident in the person you are. Then the other stuff is icing on the cake. Women are not the end all means to our happiness, and it takes time to realize that.

Pretty much this. In the end it has always come down to a lack of any self confidence and dealing with insecurities/anxieties that somehow manage to start affecting even physical well being. I keep thinking how I'll ever be able to function properly enough to even begin going down the road of knowing girls with all the baggage I'm carrying. I can't be secure in the person I am because I can't think of anything to be secure/confident/proud about myself. Sure, I have a job (for now), workout (lots of problems there, among the reasons I quit the fitness thread) and other things, but I fail to see how those mitigate all the bad things or make me anything close to a good person.

 

[RelentlessRolento]

Yes! Best thing about a new graduate semester means new girls to meet.

Already my TA job for the college has me working with someone I'm interested in. Super hot girl that seems down to earth and not in my major (studio art + studio art usually = insane, she's museum studies/art history).

Wish me luck.

 

[equap]

anybody here with match.com if so did you get an invite to some singles meetup this month? anybody ever been to one? what's it like?