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[ThatGayWolf]

I look in the direction of their room and whisper "niiiiiiceeeee"

 

[Ullus]

Fried or fertilized?

warm and hard

 

[Sciortino]

I'll be honest. The evil in me faked it at first,

Lol..

 

[akira28]

TIL: Tandem farting is one of the Rules of Attraction.

 

[Damerman]

In college my roommate had the loudest damn girlfriend I've ever heard. Either he had a God dick or she was overly sensitive.. or both. Her moans could be heard from miles away.

Needless to say I fapped a time or two.

omg nooooooooooooooooo

 

[HardRojo]

Lol..

I've always read about those green waves but never understood where the whole thing came from

 

[Yeoman]

*snip*

This is just...oh man...I can't.

 

[Messofanego]

I've always read about those green waves but never understood where the whole thing came from

Green waves represent noises.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=776087

green represents noises

 

[HardRojo]

Green waves represent noises.

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=776087

Oh. I'll read this later tonight. Thanks

 

[Carl]

Hey GAF. Weird experience last night. I was finally supposed to spend time with my BF, which is a big deal because he always has this friend of his hanging out at his place and it makes being intimate really hard. Luckily, he had a job yesterday that would keep him out pretty late (he's a clown for children's birthday parties), so me and the BF thought we'd take advantage of the situation for some alone time.

Anyway, apparently there was a situation at the party and a bunch of parents took their kids home early because of an awkward moment with a single mom? Whatever, I don't know, but it meant my BF's friend came home early. We pretended to not be there for a while (usually when he knows we're home he makes us watch him play video games which...fine...but he farts like crazy and it's extremely awkward) but as soon as it seemed like he was asleep in the next room we started to play around.

After a few minutes, we heard footsteps outside the door and pretended I was choking until he left. WEIRD, but we didn't think he bought it. My BF kept joking that he was probably jerking off in his room to the sounds we were making and it made me really uncomfortable, so I threw on a jacket, made up some story about a phone and went to check just to put my mind at ease. Turns out he wasn't, thank god, but my plan backfired and the phone was in the jacket's pocket so I thought for sure he knew why I was there.

But then instead of just letting me go back to my room, he FOLLOWED ME BACK. My BF tried to pretend he was sleeping so we wouldn't have to watch another two hours of Catherine (I think he thinks I'm impressed by it because I'm a girl). The most fucked up thing was that as soon as he got to my BF's room, he walked over and slapped him right in the face, then turned and walked out of the room. Not before taking a really long look at my ass though.

Right now it's the morning and we're sitting in the bedroom waiting for him to shower so I can leave...but I'm starting to think it's not going to happen.

Oh my god how did i miss this. Superb

 

[VASPER]

UM what? just put some headphones on and leave them be.

 

[DriftedPlanet]

The ridiculousness of the storytelling and the jokes in the thread are gold.

The only time I've ever heard a room mate having really loud sex, it was like 4 AM and I had uni the following day. I turned my speakers against his wall and played Never Gonna Give You Up at full volume at him.

Needless to say he was quieter in future.

Should've gone with this. I can't imagine anyone being able to keep at what/who they're doing with that blasting through the walls.

 

[machemachete]

HardRojo
I really wanted to slap it
(Yesterday, 08:00 AM)

 

[NateDog]

I put on headphones

The fart smell is so intoxicating. Cannot resist.

Glad I didn't post on forums when I was a virgin.

'The evil in you'? Who are you, Shadow the Hedgehog?

Did her feet skid on the floor from how wet you were making her

Hey GAF. Weird experience last night. I was finally supposed to spend time with my BF, which is a big deal because he always has this friend of his hanging out at his place and it makes being intimate really hard. Luckily, he had a job yesterday that would keep him out pretty late (he's a clown for children's birthday parties), so me and the BF thought we'd take advantage of the situation for some alone time.

Anyway, apparently there was a situation at the party and a bunch of parents took their kids home early because of an awkward moment with a single mom? Whatever, I don't know, but it meant my BF's friend came home early. We pretended to not be there for a while (usually when he knows we're home he makes us watch him play video games which...fine...but he farts like crazy and it's extremely awkward) but as soon as it seemed like he was asleep in the next room we started to play around.

After a few minutes, we heard footsteps outside the door and pretended I was choking until he left. WEIRD, but we didn't think he bought it. My BF kept joking that he was probably jerking off in his room to the sounds we were making and it made me really uncomfortable, so I threw on a jacket, made up some story about a phone and went to check just to put my mind at ease. Turns out he wasn't, thank god, but my plan backfired and the phone was in the jacket's pocket so I thought for sure he knew why I was there.

But then instead of just letting me go back to my room, he FOLLOWED ME BACK. My BF tried to pretend he was sleeping so we wouldn't have to watch another two hours of Catherine (I think he thinks I'm impressed by it because I'm a girl). The most fucked up thing was that as soon as he got to my BF's room, he walked over and slapped him right in the face, then turned and walked out of the room. Not before taking a really long look at my ass though.

Right now it's the morning and we're sitting in the bedroom waiting for him to shower so I can leave...but I'm starting to think it's not going to happen.

Yooooo this thread is fucking unreal.

 

[Nyx]

One time a neighbour was going at it, I could literally hear what the female screamed all the time....

When she screamed : ''I'm comiiiiiinnnngggggg.....'' I yelled back : ''Me toooooooooooo''
Since then I never heard loud sex noises again.

 

[E92 M3]

One time a neighbour was going at it, I could literally hear what the female screamed all the time....

When she screamed : ''I'm comiiiiiinnnngggggg.....'' I yelled back : ''Me toooooooooooo''
Since then I never heard loud sex noises again.

lol. Let the guy enjoy the fruits of his labor

 

[Yoshichan]

op wanted to slap the gf's cheeks, but settled for slapping his friends cheeks.

At this point, I was dying of laughter

 

[I Big JG I]

Smash it OP. SMASH IT.

 

[Nyx]

lol. Let the guy enjoy the fruits of his labor

I need my 7 hours of sleep yo.

 

[FyreWulff]

the female

 

[Clefargle]

Just went back and read this thread again. Omg, the best thread I've read in a while. That page three is real.

 

[HardRojo]

Lol it's funny coming back to this thread again now. I was definitely reading too much into the situation.

 

[Byakuya769]

She said she had tried ringing it. If she had, it would have rang as it did when I actually did ring it and she would have noticed it was in the pocket. I also would have been able to hear the ringtone since the rooms are next to each other, and remember, I heard the action. I don't think I'm overthinking it to be honest.

You're not.

 

[zewone]

Why were you slapping your friend if he was asleep?

Why did he need to wake up?

 

[ShadowKingpin]

This one time my roommate and this chick were fucking in the side room while my friend and I were watching Billy Madison in the other. We cranked up certain moments on the surround sound system to get him (The roommate) to bust up laughing like, "So sorry to interrupt!" and the "Shampoo is better!" moments. Moments after, we would hear him laughing and saying, "Fuck you! I know you can hear us!". We don't let him live it down.

 

[HardRojo]

Why were you slapping your friend if he was asleep?

Why did he need to wake up?

I just did it for the heck of it. Slap a friend while he's asleep, cream on the hand and wake him up. Isn't it pretty common stuff friends do?

 

[davepoobond]

Walls are kinda thin here so when it happens its kinda funny to hear what one of them says sometimes

"This is yours!"

"Yes yes yes"

When they first start I hear an abrupt painful groan so I think someone is getting hurt and look outside my room only to then hear their bed shaking a little bit

Its funny

 

[gamechanger87]

I just did it for the heck of it. Slap a friend while he's asleep, cream on the hand and wake him up. Isn't it pretty common stuff friends do?

What kind of "cream" are we talking about here?

 

[DistortionOfReality]

Hey GAF. Weird experience last night...

But then instead of just letting me go back to my room, he FOLLOWED ME BACK. My BF tried to pretend he was sleeping so we wouldn't have to watch another two hours of Catherine (I think he thinks I'm impressed by it because I'm a girl). The most fucked up thing was that as soon as he got to my BF's room, he walked over and slapped him right in the face, then turned and walked out of the room. Not before taking a really long look at my ass though.

Hahaha oh my god holy shit dead.gif
That bit slayed me

I just did it for the heck of it. Slap a friend while he's asleep, cream on the hand and wake him up. Isn't it pretty common stuff friends do?

Seriously dude what is going on there is no way you can't see how sexually suggestive that sounds

 

[HardRojo]

What kind of "cream" are we talking about here?

Whipped cream or something like that. Not the natural kind lol.

Seriously dude what is going on there is no way you can't see how sexually suggestive that sounds

Now that you mention it, yeah I do notice lol. Blame my non-native English

 

[DarkHeartedKill]

Netflix and chill with her.

 

[HardRojo]

Netflix and chill with her.

That would most likely turn out to be Netflix and chill in the literal sense.

 

[atr0cious]

Be glad he's not alone and going at it.

 

[Liquidsnake]

 

[davepoobond]

That would most likely turn out to be Netflix and chill in the literal sense.

netflix and chill in the literal sense is sex. there is no alternate meaning

 

[FloatOn]

god damn this thread has slayed me

 

[JoseLopez]

Join in

 

[POWERSPHERE]

Wank

 

[Nephtis]

Is it too late to summon Lionel Mandrake and Sunhi? Is SunhiLegend still around?

 

[HardRojo]

Join in

Sure, if they invite me.

 

[The Albatross]

This thread is so odd and title does not match the post at all. this thread wins

 

[HardRojo]

netflix and chill in the literal sense is sex. there is no alternate meaning

I know but seriously, it'd be just movies I swear.

 

[Cilla]

It makes perfect sense to me. She called his phone. Didn't hear anything. Decided to ask you. Was naked so quickly chucked on the first thing she found - the jacket. Then asked you.