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[Dead Man]

A chimp doesn't know how to evade or use it's speed. It has potential to use more, but it's lack of focused power would limit a lot of it's advantages in certain situations. A chimp can run away, but it can't block a punch. Guys can punch through bricks. Guys can kick with incredible force. If they dodged a chimps pummel, a martial artist would have the advantage.



I'll also allow it. It's human nature to use drugs.

No. Guys can break bricks. Not the same thing. Bricks are brittle. Chimps are not.

Chimps are extremely aggressive. I'd prefer to be locked in a cage with a Gorilla than a Chimp.

By far.

 

[Gr1mLock]

I think Brock Lesnar could take a chimp.

 

[Fantasmo]

So if chimp are so fucked up why aren't they killing everyone? Are they demonic killing machines like this thread makes them out to be?

 

[flippedb]

So if chimp are so fucked up why aren't they killing everyone? Are they demonic killing machines like this thread makes them out to be?

Well, they do kill humans and other primates when they have the chance.

 

[Dead Man]

So if chimp are so fucked up why aren't they killing everyone? Are they demonic killing machines like this thread makes them out to be?

Because most people know not to fuck with them, they don't live near cities, and they don't want to take over the world.

 

[balddemon]

What about the biggest, meanest species of bear you can find vs a chimp?

 

[ThatCrazyGuy]

I want to see a chimp vs a bear. Or a tiger .

Or a samurai vs a chimp . Maybe a ninja.

A chimp would win this 99.9 of the time vs some martial artist dude.

 

[zero_suit]

What about the biggest, meanest species of bear you can find vs a chimp?

A polar or grizzly bear would destroy a chimp.

 

[Timedog]

What about the biggest, meanest species of bear you can find vs a chimp?

hahaha bear 100/100 times.

 

[Az987]

The chimp is blind and the martial artist was already castrated and doesn't have a face but he can see. He's like daredevil and its raining so he sees the echoes or some shit. He's Ben Affleck without a face.

 

[Fantasmo]

Time to ask in a different way.. are chimps natural killers? Is that what the exist to do? Because that's all I keep reading.

 

[akira28]

So if chimp are so fucked up why aren't they killing everyone? Are they demonic killing machines like this thread makes them out to be?

They're simple animals, luckily for us. Easily frightened. They don't attack humans unless we put ourselves on their level, like direct confrontation, looking them in the eye, etc. We usually go through the jungle armed. And people have been hunting chimps for centuries.

 

[A More Normal Bird]

Unarmed, I would give an elite heavyweight fighter with head to toe protective clothing (and a cup) a small chance of defeating either an infant chimp or an old and decrepit one.

 

[AllIsOneIsNone]

I want to see a chimp vs a bear. Or a tiger .

Or a samurai vs a chimp . Maybe a ninja.

A chimp would win this 99.9 of the time.

ninja/samurai with a sword? That's more bizarre of a conclusion than my op.

 

[Kinitari]

A chimp doesn't know how to evade or use it's speed. It has potential to use more, but it's lack of focused power would limit a lot of it's advantages in certain situations. A chimp can run away, but it can't block a punch. Guys can punch through bricks. Guys can kick with incredible force. If they dodged a chimps pummel, a martial artist would have the advantage.

What the hell is focused power? A chimp could take a punch from Jaleel white, right to the balls, and just be really mad about it.

All this assumes that the chimp isn't raring for a fight anyway. If the chimp for example ran toward the dude, what's the guy going to do? Roll out of the way?

Honestly, there is no chance dude. None.

 

[Az987]

I want to see a chimp vs a bear. Or a tiger .

Or a samurai vs a chimp . Maybe a ninja.

A chimp would win this 99.9 of the time.

A ninja chimp vs a ninja samurai?

I meant Samurai chimp but I think a ninja samurai could probably take a ninja chimp.

 

[LaserBuddha]

What about the biggest, meanest species of bear you can find vs a chimp?

A grizzly or polar bear can knock your head off with a swipe of their claws. That's not a joke.

 

[Timedog]

What if it was Daigo and he just parried all the chimps attacks?

 

[SquiddyCracker]

No way the chimp will lose.

 

[DonMigs85]

What about chimp versus male orangutan?

 

[Reuenthal]

average neogafer with a sword vs a chimp

How many neogafers will it take to kill it?

 

[Odoul]

Do you know how strong a monkey is?

Rip your dick/ballsack off and throw that shit in the tall grass, never to be seen again.

 

[AdventureRacing]

Time to ask in a different way.. are chimps natural killers? Is that what the exist to do? Because that's all I keep reading.

They are extremely powerful animals that also happen to be very aggressive. I'm not sure what else there is to it.

 

[Timedog]

average neogafer with a sword vs a chimp

How many neogafers will it take to kill it?

all fighting at once, or one man vs the chimp at a time?

 

[MrToughPants]

The chimp is blind and the martial artist was already castrated and doesn't have a face but he can see. He's like daredevil and its raining so he sees the echoes or some shit. He's Ben Affleck without a face.

They fall in love and the Ben Affleck chimp gets pregnant creating a species of blind Himps.

 

[AllIsOneIsNone]

average neogafer with a sword vs a chimp

How many neogafers will it take to kill it?

I'd do it if I had a light saber.

 

[Reuenthal]

all fighting at once, or one man vs the chimp at a time?

All at once.

 

[Avixph]

A grizzly or polar bear can knock your head off with a swipe of their claws. That's not a joke.

 

[Schweinehund]

What about some like 240 lb 6'6 muscled guy with brass knuckles?

At any rate, how about a grizzly bear vs. an ape? I'm betting the bear.

 

[Timedog]

All at once.

Two to three.

 

[MrHicks]

reminded me of this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bP22OrkEYAQ

SUMO vs Female Orang utan pulling contest

 

[ThatCrazyGuy]

Ninja chimps? With swords?

Gamer over man, game over.

Unless reptile ninja men arose from the depths.

But cept all that . Polar bear wins all.

 

[Az987]

They fall in love and the Ben Affleck chimp gets pregnant creating a species of blind Himps.

Ben Affleck is already castrated though so who gets who pregnant?

 

[TacticalFox88]

How bout this.

Siberian Tiger vs Grizzly Bear.

:O

 

[usea]

average neogafer with a sword vs a chimp

How many neogafers will it take to kill it?

2. But the people would die first. The chimp would die later from blood loss.

 

[East Lake]

What are you expecting the connected punches to do? The chimpanzee skull has a thick, small brain case, tucked behind a thick brow ridge, nestled in thick cords of neck muscle. Not to mention the blind animal fury they fight with. The chimp will hardly notice any punch as he instantly grabs and effortlessly de-digitizes/castrates you the moment you're within reach.

I know I'm just humoring the magic punch.

 

[balddemon]

A grizzly or polar bear can knock your head off with a swipe of their claws. That's not a joke.

O.O

That's kind of awesome. I also wonder if there are actually bears on steroids like the one in thesis and the hound.

Could anything defeat a bear?

 

[zero_suit]

Could anything defeat a bear?

LOL, rhino and elephant for sure.

 

[SapientWolf]

The chimp is blind and the martial artist was already castrated and doesn't have a face but he can see. He's like daredevil and its raining so he sees the echoes or some shit. He's Ben Affleck without a face.

Most of Ben Affleck's is appeal is that he has a face, so it's hard to care about the outcome here.

 

[akira28]

Give me battle armor of my choosing, and I'll face the chimp. I need just need to protect my face, balls, fingers, throat, ears, etc.

 

[Avixph]

LOL, rhino and elephant for sure.

Or a person.

 

[nomster]

The chimp 100 out of a 100 times, I don't care if the guy is the greatest martial artist in the world.

 

[Jack Remington]

What about some like 240 lb 6'6 muscled guy with brass knuckles?

At any rate, how about a grizzly bear vs. an ape? I'm betting the bear.

Muscled dude stomps.


People are vastly overestimating the chimp's capabilities in this thread.

 

[DonMigs85]

O.O

That's kind of awesome. I also wonder if there are actually bears on steroids like the one in thesis and the hound.

Could anything defeat a bear?

lol

 

[MrHicks]

king on land = male elephant
king in seas = orca's
the air = prob some bigass eagle

 

[ThatCrazyGuy]

How about a tag team match.

Chimp x Bear vs rhino x hippo

Ninja Matt Damon is the ref.

 

[Dereck]

What if it was Daigo and he just parried all the chimps attacks?

LOL

 

[Kinitari]

Muscled dude stomps.


People are vastly overestimating the chimp's capabilities in this thread.

How do you think the fight would go?

 

[MrToughPants]

Ben Affleck is already castrated though so who gets who pregnant?

Ben chimp is blind so it remains a mystery we only find out who the father is on Maury.

 

[Riposte]

Does the martial artist know hokuto shinken?