Mahadev
Member
It happens sometimes for rape victims not for a woman that was flashed by someone and he immediately backed off when he realized she didn't want him. You're equating rape with the alleged incident, it's fucking ridiculous.
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Waypoint: Inside the Sexual Misconduct Allegations Rocking NeoGAF's Last 48 Hours
- Thread starter Dineren
- Start date
It happens sometimes for rape victims not for a woman that was flashed by someone and he immediately backed off when he realized she didn't want him. You're equating rape with the alleged incident, it's fucking ridiculous.
Phoenix RISING
Banned
No, it isn't, but that does not mean that we can't apply the same methodologies to "building a case."
If dude jumps in the shower with her, and she goes to the authorities immediately (let's say, that night or the next day), gets a restraining order, cancels her trip, and terminates her friendship, we're not having this discussion at all, and we *really* wouldn't be here.
Instead, she admits that he knew people. He had connections. She wanted to use him to benefit her career in cinema.
That detail in the Kotaku article combined with the post-assault consensual sex, is what is earning all the side-eyes.
All Hail C-Webb
Hailing from the Chill-Web
Disadvantaged. He was in her movie. She was literally the boss in this situation.
CHILDREN...
blankempathy
Member
So are you saying all victims have to be perfect?
And you're equating flashing with showing up unwanted directly behind a vulnerable woman in a small, enclosed space.
Great, so any time someone goes in for a kiss without asking for consent first is committing sexual assault. Got it.
They weren't dating.
Meesh
Member
Actually more super intimidating... not sure if hostile is overblown(probably) but if I wasn't interested and someone pursued me naked into a shower while I was sick I'd be more than creeped out. As I'm reading bits and pieces from all over the place... it feels or sounds more than a bold or overly direct play... it's too aggressive. To the point that a person in that situation could be concerned...
But hey, I'm still trying to imagine the actual scenario based on what little I've got.
...most definitely though,this situation is handled so bad...
Herr Schwarz
Banned
Yeah her being sick and throwing up creates a level of drama. I don't know if.she was being exorcist sick or just beer sick.
It doesn't really matter. Outside of showing evillore has really bad decision making abilities.
If she told evillore to go. But he didn't leave. And he started whackin it or whatever. Then it would be a totally different situation.
But he left he respected what she wanted.
This isn't an assault. This isn't anything. You should feel sad for all the reactionary idiots self immolating.
They're wrong and they're idiots.
People only have sexual/romantic encounters when they're dating?
I applaud your turnaround.
I also think it's worth mentioning that I've been posting here for a few years (never super active, but I check in a few times a week) and lurking for a couple before that, and I never knew anything about Evilore at all until last week. I'm sure I've read his name a handful of times but he hasn't played any direct role in my time with this community. In fact, I dare say you could probably hate this guy and still participate in conversations all over the website without ever having him come up.
Obviously I understand the idea of why people are leaving and there's not any way to stop them (and I can't blame you either, if what he did really disgusts you then do what you gotta do) but if you were really enjoying being part of the community here until last week's news, your experience here honestly probably won't change much... let's be honest, things might not ever be exactly the same but only a few days later things are already starting to blow over. Maybe the new forums will take off, or maybe by 2018 GAF will have Off-Topic back and things will return to business as usual.
Obviously I understand the idea of why people are leaving and there's not any way to stop them (and I can't blame you either, if what he did really disgusts you then do what you gotta do) but if you were really enjoying being part of the community here until last week's news, your experience here honestly probably won't change much... let's be honest, things might not ever be exactly the same but only a few days later things are already starting to blow over. Maybe the new forums will take off, or maybe by 2018 GAF will have Off-Topic back and things will return to business as usual.
Vicetrailia
Member
What this is not is Hollywood execs who exert quid quo pro, or that drunk male who fingers a drunk woman in a club without her consent, but she goes with it only because she is under the influence of alcohol. In the end, a clear choice was made. That is a distinction that we can make on the pitched forks side considering the context and results.
blankempathy
Member
"A level of drama". Ok let me present another scenario to you. Someone is intoxicated and sick which makes them vulnerable. They go and take a shower and someone tries to take advantage of them not feeling well and tries to initiate sex. Which I don't give a fuck what you say if you're stripping down and jumping into a shower with someone clearly you're trying to have sex with them. However she wasn't as vulnerable as he thought she was since clearly she was coherent enough to tell him to get out and the only decent thing he did was step out of that shower. And again I present you this question. What if she wasn't coherent enough to tell him to get out?
Entroyp
Member
He is right though. And before you come at me with the same tired argument, I helped a rape victim to overcome sexual assault and all you say could not be more wrong.
corduroyCUCK
Banned
2011: "Asking a girl out in an elevator isn't even a big deal"
2017: "Hopping in the shower uninvited with a vulnerable drunk girl who has a boyfriend and trying to fuck her isn't even a big deal"
2017: "Hopping in the shower uninvited with a vulnerable drunk girl who has a boyfriend and trying to fuck her isn't even a big deal"
Herr Schwarz
Banned
Again you're high off your own drama.
No lol I wouldn't present my naked buttocks to a woman i hadn't started dating like that. I don't generally go to hotels with girls that I'm not having sex with already though.
All Hail C-Webb
Hailing from the Chill-Web
Someone she was drinking with alone in a hotel room?
I can tell you that the women I know would be wondering why the guy didn't make a move.
Going straight to naked is never the best move, but one thing that is very clear. Tyler isn't good with women. He tries PUA stuff, and while that's really embarrassing, that's not sexual assault. You should sue CBS and How I Met Your Mother, or numerous other family friendly shows and movies.
She saw a friends dick, and now she's suffering from Stockholm Syndrome? Holy fucking shit, that's one of the stupidest things I've ever read.
Explain why it's okay to kiss someone you're not romantically involved with without asking
This is some "I'm not racist because I have a black friend" level shit.
You helped a rape victim and so that means you're totally on the level when you defend exposing yourself to women.
ok.
Mahadev
Member
Did she say he did anything more? Did she say he even touched her? This is what brings "crippling issues" that then causes someone to continue their friendship and even have a sexual relationship? Seriously? I think I'm done with armchair psychologists for now, we're getting nowhere.
Only sleeping together.
Herr Schwarz
Banned
Tries to initiate sex? What? I didn't read the part he started prodding with his pecker. Or groped her.
I thought he just showed up naked. Stood there. Got told to go away. Then left.
He was grabbing her and trying to put it In?
Or are you just making shit up to add some extra colour to your drama?
The fact is you're choosing to look at this in . A . certain way.
And you're fetishizing it to a degree that's weird just to fufil your personal notion of what you think must of happened.
Cos when I read it. I see some fail and sad attempt to.be bold get shot down into.the dirt.
And if she couldn't respond, you just make the assumption some date rape could happen?
Well...yeah probably. I mean, it depends. If you go to starbucks and kiss the cashier without asking for consent then you can be arrested for sexual assault. When you go on a date on you're both feeling each other, consent is typically implied. The grey area tends to be when alcohol is involved. In my opinion, intent is key. Sexual act with intent to ignore consent = sexual harassment/assault.
Sometimes you misread the signs. Maybe you thought the person was flirting, when they weren't. There are grey areas.
There's always a first kiss. 9 times out of 10, the guy initiates without asking for permission, he just tries to read the signs. To paint that as sexual assault is just insane.
Do they own a time machine?
All Hail C-Webb
Hailing from the Chill-Web
I have never asked to kiss a girl.
I have kissed many girls.
I assaulted all of them? The one's that got in relationships with me were all suffering from Stockholm Syndrome?
I have been kissed by girls quite a few times without them asking first.
Did they assault me?
Probably a matter of time before this point is looked upon as invalid by the majority of those still in this site.
blankempathy
Member
I did not say he physically tried to initiate sex by touching her. I said he tried to initiate sex. Meaning he presented himself and was hoping she'd react in a sexual manner.
Apparently, deleting threads that expose the pedophile (Amirox) and sexual harrassment (Evilore) is fooling people into believing these things never happened.
Haha. Yeah if you like an authoritarian who censors what's going on behind the scenes is your thing, feel free to stay.
Haha. Yeah if you like an authoritarian who censors what's going on behind the scenes is your thing, feel free to stay.
What part of being drunk in a hotel room is affirmative consent?
Rapist! You didn't ask for permission first!
Steeped in a Sea of Games
Member
Possibly? What if they had been men? What if they were women you found unattractive? What if you were in a relationship and didn't want it?
Herr Schwarz
Banned
Ok. And then you implied rape would happen.
Dude this whole scenario. If you think about it. It's pathetic sad and embarrassing. It's the worst most awkward play ever.
But.he was.drunk too so.he said?
Not saying it wasn't fucking stupid. It was.
It just wasn't a sex attack or assault.
You don't always get affirmative consent first in every situation. A drunken night in a shared hotel room could be considered a romantic setting. What matters is that she made it clear she wasn't interested and he did not continue to pursue the situation after she rejected him. Had he tried to touch her or grope her after she clearly refused to consent, then it would have been sexual assault. But he got out of the shower, and they talked through the situation and remained friends.
This is a valid question, but I think if you really approach this question with an attempt at having an open mind instead of just being outraged, you'll realize that it's entirely possible that he did not have her vulnerability in mind like you're implying. Maybe if he got in there and saw that she wasn't coherent enough, he would have gotten out and tried to call for help. We don't know. It is valid to assume that might have had bad intentions, but it is also valid to think maybe he was just drunk and misread the situation. I mean, they did sleep together later on (an no, the events do not fit the profile of Stockholm syndrome).
All Hail C-Webb
Hailing from the Chill-Web
That's usually how sex works. We present ourselves, and the woman decides.
Dude was probably building up the guts to do it, not even noticing that she was puking, finally does it, gets shot down and walks away with his tail between his legs.
It's a funny story. If a male friend did it to me, I would laugh so hard he'd be really offended. I can't think of anyone I know in real life who would take offense here.
Why, in your mind, does he only need consent after already partaking in a sexual act that she didn't consent to?
You're right, people don't always get affirmative consent in every situation, but they fucking should. Not only because it's morally the right thing to do, because jumping naked unannounced into a shower with a woman can be a terrifying thing especially to some women, but to protect yourself, too.
What matters is that he didn't get that consent. He didn't try to touch her or grope her after she refused consent, but he had already violated her consent by being there naked in the first place.
Where the hell are you from, man? That's not how sex works. You don't present yourself naked to some woman who hasn't consented to it in order to get sex. The fuck planet are you from?
The Strokes
Banned
I love how you casually dismiss this business like it means nothing for the victim involved and the suspiciously quiet accused. You're the reason why sexual assault is a normalized social conduct that's applauded by America.
Two things:
-That's not how 'sex' works.
- Nice to know that the view you have of the world consists barely of the social sphere you inhabit.
Herr Schwarz
Banned
Shame on the house of NeoGaf for deleting their accounts over this nothing burger.
Those Simpson pics were apt. The gummy bear episode ones.
Bring back OT please. This shit is over with.
Those Simpson pics were apt. The gummy bear episode ones.
Bring back OT please. This shit is over with.
blankempathy
Member
So being drunk is an excuse now? I implied that if she were too sick to resist this story may be very different. Because after all her saying no is what made him stop. Not his own conscious saying "Hey maybe I shouldn't jump naked into the shower with someone who is sick and throwing up and may be vulnerable". And its funny he didn't make his "awkward play" until she was sick and throwing up. I mean they went on a roadtrip and had plenty of time to be alone together. Funny how her being sick was the time he tried to make his move. Maybe thats just a big coincidence though. You're right about one thing. He didn't physically sexually assault her but she still has a right to be angry about it. Its certainly not something a small issue like you make it out to be though just because nothing physically happened. And if we're going by his 2012 story its clear Evilore has an issue respecting women's boundaries.
This is the future of NeoGAF, huh? Reddit-esque shrugging off of sexual assault.
The former mods would have crushed this bullshit in a heartbeat.
You say; "sorry, I dont bend that way. Not cool. Don't do it again". Shake hands. Move on.
What you don't do is cry "rape". Specially not after two years. Definitely not after having sex afterwards.
BlitzerRadic
Member
Living in San Francisco, I've had multiple instances where guys would expose their dicks to me or show me their visible boners through their pants (while riding on the train of all places) hoping to get me to react. Am I a victim of sexual assault?
Herr Schwarz
Banned
I've been chased and targeted by a murdering pedophile, son. I've seen the face of evil and it looks fucking nothing like this.
Trust me this shit isn't anything but a nothing burger. People derp up a whole lot in life.
It's a drama hurricane with no real drama.