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A guy I don't know is threatening to kill me over a dumb joke

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Rest

Rest

All these years later I still chuckle at what a fucking moron that guy is.
1. Call the police
2. Call a lawyer
3. Sue the makers of 5 Gum
4. Profit
 
I

iMax

Member
Sub_Level said:
This is what chewing 5 gum feels like.
Click to expand...

giphy.gif
 
cheststrongwell

cheststrongwell

my cake, fuck off
I had a similar situation last year. It was funny as hell at first, but then I found out I could easily find my name and address with google. I apologized and luckily he accepted. Random dudes can be crazy as fuck.
 
J

Jason's Ultimatum

Member
OP, send this to him:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking to blackmail,me, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you end this now, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
 
Yoshichan

Yoshichan

And they made him a Lord of Cinder. Not for virtue, but for might. Such is a lord, I suppose. But here I ask. Do we have a sodding chance?
Jason's Ultimatum said:
OP, send this to him:

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking to blackmail,me, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you end this now, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.
Click to expand...
Taken, right?
 
C

CarpeDeezNutz

Member
Show 5 gum this thread and tell them it's a script for a commerical you made up.


Dude sounds like he had his suspicions that treachery was afoot and the random beautiful text confirmed it.

Dude just chill.
 
G

GovtPlates

Neo Member
I say just when he thinks this has blown over, piss him off again and show him who's really in control of the situation.
 
C

Champagne

Banned
Should've reversed it on him.

Get his address off of Google, show up at his house, beat the shit out of him, and fuck his wife while he watches.
 
W

WaffleTaco

Wants to outlaw technological innovation.
Yeah if someone did that I would call them out on it and say: "This a joke motherfucker, so get the fuck over it. I do not know who the fuck you are or who you goddamned wife is. You are not going to kill me, so do not even threaten it. You do that, and you are going to jail for quite a while, because I have already told friends about it and have the texts captured on my phone and safely deposited with people. And the best part is, after you get out of jail your wife will not be with you making this entirely pointless. Also can you live with yourself for killing someone who did you no wrong except read a joke off a wrapper? Is that the type of person you are. I am going to leave you with this: I apolgise that this caused this amount of stress for you and I hope you have a nice day."

Seriously though if they keep bothering you contact the police.
 
H

hobblygobbly

Member
OP you have witnesses and stuff, get a lawyer and police, there's a lot to start off with to protect you and get him into shit with his threats.

I can tell you now when the guy saw this he probably treated his wife/girlfriend like shit and accused her of tons of things, then gets this explanation and possibly believes it but feels like an idiot for maybe what he has done to his wife/girlfriend with accusations etc and doesn't want to back down.
 
F

faridmon

Member
Relax, nothing will happen. I guess the guy said those words out of passion and never actually meant any of it, his wife is cheating on him, so of course he would be emotional. Its just he is one of those that gets incredibly jealous incredibly fast and furious.

If you just ignore it, nothing will happen.
 
R

rugioh

Banned
Bombasador said:
Before this whole situation gets more sticky and pops, you need to call the guy and chew him out. You're in the big leagues with this guy. You should double your safety, double your guns, with double men double men guns.
Click to expand...

Underestimated post.
 
A

Alienous

Member
Call him up. If he starts threatening you just move the phone away from your mouth, turn away from it and say "Did you get that? Did you record that?" then wrap up the conversation and hang-up.

He won't do shit. Probably.
 
J

Jeff-DSA

Member
I'm alive! I haven't heard from the offended all day, so I think he probably chilled out and is going about his life in a semi-normal manner today. I talked to him one last time, and he was still really edgy. I told him that I hadn't and didn't plan on calling the cops, so he could chill out and I would forget it if he would just assure me that he wasn't going to mess with my family.

I get the feeling that he's the type of guy that if someone yells out, "hey, asshole!" on a crowded street he's the one guy who looks up and gets pissed off.
 
davepoobond

davepoobond

you can't put a price on sparks
Ledsen said:
Isn't there service in the U.S. to find someone's name and home address from their cell number? Assumed they had that everywhere.
Click to expand...

trust me, there's all sorts of services you can use to find information out about people you don't know anything about.

in this case, all you needed was google. there are tons of databases that track all sorts of info.
 
K

Kumquat

Member
This reminds me of a story.

I used to be a store tech for Verizon Wireless and I would do a test call from a phone a lot to make sure it was working. Most of the time I would just use the store line but if all the lines were tied up I would just use my phone.

So one night I'm chilling and playing Eve at about 9:30 PM or so and my phone rings from some random number. I pick it up and immediately someone yells, "WHO THE HELL IS THIS?!?"

So, I don't take this kind of crap off of people and I inform his happy ass that he was the one who called me so he can damn well tell me just who the hell he is first. That is how polite society works lunkhead.

So he goes on and on about how he found my number on her phone and how she is cheating on him with me and how he is going to do so so to me, etc. Whole time I'm thinking man, you got some serious problems in your life if you are snooping through a phone and freaking out over one call from a random number.

Fortunately I was able to convince him I was a tech at Verizon, I just fixed her phone that day, and that he needed to apologize for being such an ass.


Point of the story is if you cringe and whine you are seen as weak and untrustworthy by this person and confirm everything he is thinking. You need to be strong, forceful, calm, and confident. That gets people like that to back off most of the time. Stay safe OP
 
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