From the statement above one would assume the PS4 only uses 4.5GB (to 5GB) of RAM and the rest just sits there idly. In reality though the other 3 (to 3.5GB) is being ring-fenced by the PS4 OS and more of it may or may not be utilized, by games, now or in future. Contrary to much of the uneducated furore this is actually a positive since it means the console could potentially have more RAM allocated to games in future (you can always give back since it's only taking away that would break compatibility). A more factual statement would have been "The PS4 only allocates 4.5-5GB of RAM to games at present" which, considering the console was originally planned to only launch with 4GB in total, is not disappointing at all.
Yes, and it's not just that, games will be requesting resources from the OS through its APIs all the time. There will all kinds of crossover areas where there is infrastructure code which will be in the OS instead of the game, so the game doesn't implement chunks of functionality and just requests it through the OS. Trophy support, sharing, save file management, notifications, updates etc. It all has to appear transparent between the two. From what's been said there's also an API to request a chunk of RAM but currently limited to 512MB. It's better that stuff is in the OS segment than custom to each game.
The OS is also Unix based, and Unix based OSs will make use of all the RAM available and manage it effectively. A lot of it will be used for disk caching, to avoid hitting the disk with every read, i.e. on my PC at the moment I've only got 768MB "free", but 3.3GB RAM is used for caching, which is released to apps as they request memory.
It would nice if they could do a tech dive into this stuff one day.