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[Karl007]

I just had to resurrect this thread now that I’m able to post so I could share my own horrific story:

A few years ago when I was still in high school in my senor years I too shared the same fate as many others here who ‘crapped their pants’

It was your average boring day at school and I was enjoying my lunch break when I felt the urge to shit.
The past few days I hadn’t been feeling too well as the flu was going around my school and I had picked up on it as you do with people coughing and sneezing around you all day.

So anyway I felt the urge to shit and since I didn’t really want to waste my lunch break hanging out with my friends I tried to put it off. Well 20 minutes past and the feeling started to get worse and worse to the point where I was almost feeling pain. Oh god I have to shit NOW.

I excused my self from my friends making up an excuse that I needed to get some stuff from my locker and proceeded to power walk to the toilets. Sadly when getting there all the cubicles were occupied. Fuck. I left and made my way to the other toilets at the end of the school where the younger kids went but alas, they were taken as well. DAMN IT. Shit was getting serious and I knew that this wasn’t going to be your ordinary shit – it was diarrhea

I had two choices, wait for a toilet or go to the toilet in our common room for the older students.
Now this common room toilet was off limits to students. It wasn’t supposed to be used as a substitute for the other toilets and the coordinator had cracked it at people using it. Well I had no choice so I decided to go for it, id just take the punishment if caught or whatever.

My insides were hurting, the shit was pushing up against my asshole and It felt it was about to come out. I felt sick.
Walking fast / jogging I made it to the common room. There were only a few people inside and I manage to stealthily make my way around the room and slip in and close the door.

I had only just closed the door and was fiddling with the lock when it happened. I started to shit.
I ran to the toilet, dropped my pants, spun around and lifted the lift all in smooth motion but I was too late.

Shit came flying out of my ass, ending up on my underpants, legs, the floor and down the side toilet.
No…. no no no!!!!!! *sobbing*
I couldn’t believe it and was frozen for about 5 seconds, for the first time in my life I just crapped my pants – and in school.

I finished up but there was mess everywhere and my underpants were beyond recoverable.
There were no proper bins in the room either, so I had to stuff them into this little side bin for the paper towel when drying your hands.

When I had just done this there was a knock at the door and my heart sank. My year level coordinator was banging on the door demanding to know who was in there. “….ill be just a minute!”

I was panicking and was trapped. Surely with the attention my coordinator was drawing banging and yelling on the door everyone would be watching, waiting to see who just got busted.

I couldn’t, and wouldn’t accept being caught and known for the rest of my school life as the kid who shat his pants. Plus the room was destroyed. Shit on the floor, shit all over the toilet, shit filled underpants in the bin – I would never be able to live it down!

Luckily there was a small window at the top of the room and being a skinny, tall guy and desperate I managed to climb up, open and fall out the window (almost handing on my neck by the way)

I gathered my self and stealthy made my way around the building and re-entered the common room. I had to make it look like I wasn’t a suspect or suspicious at all. To my shock there was a big crowd, excited to see who was in the room and wouldn’t open up. I casually walked up to a friend and asked what was going on. He explained and also mentioned that the teachers had gone to get a key.

Well when they opened it my heart was racing and there was a “OMG WHAT THE HELL!!” moment. Followed by cursing and my coordinator running out holding his mouth.

Needless to say that caused quite a stir especially since they never found out who it was and I was damn lucky.

 

[Zabka]

You're like Superman! You shit all over, vanish from the room, then you show up like Clark Kent asking people what happened.

Brilliant.

 

[Sibylus]

You're like Superman! You shit all over, vanish from the room, then you show up like Clark Kent asking people what happened.

Brilliant.

Ahahaha, just remembered the scene at Niagara Falls with the hot dog :lol

Great story, Karl.

 

[Shawsie64]

:lol :lol :lol

Epic bump! Full ninja style!

 

[Anticitizen One]

I poo'd my pants in like 4th. grade

It was kinda cool cuz I got to go home early and play video games. The trade off was that all the kids made fun the next day

 

[AlternativeUlster]

I poo'd my pants in like 4th. grade

It was kinda cool cuz I got to go home early and play video games. The trade off was that all the kids made fun the next day

 

[Jangaroo]

I just had to resurrect this thread now that I’m able to post so I could share my own horrific story:

A few years ago when I was still in high school in my senor years I too shared the same fate as many others here who ‘crapped their pants’

It was your average boring day at school and I was enjoying my lunch break when I felt the urge to shit.
The past few days I hadn’t been feeling too well as the flu was going around my school and I had picked up on it as you do with people coughing and sneezing around you all day.

So anyway I felt the urge to shit and since I didn’t really want to waste my lunch break hanging out with my friends I tried to put it off. Well 20 minutes past and the feeling started to get worse and worse to the point where I was almost feeling pain. Oh god I have to shit NOW.

I excused my self from my friends making up an excuse that I needed to get some stuff from my locker and proceeded to power walk to the toilets. Sadly when getting there all the cubicles were occupied. Fuck. I left and made my way to the other toilets at the end of the school where the younger kids went but alas, they were taken as well. DAMN IT. Shit was getting serious and I knew that this wasn’t going to be your ordinary shit – it was diarrhea

I had two choices, wait for a toilet or go to the toilet in our common room for the older students.
Now this common room toilet was off limits to students. It wasn’t supposed to be used as a substitute for the other toilets and the coordinator had cracked it at people using it. Well I had no choice so I decided to go for it, id just take the punishment if caught or whatever.

My insides were hurting, the shit was pushing up against my asshole and It felt it was about to come out. I felt sick.
Walking fast / jogging I made it to the common room. There were only a few people inside and I manage to stealthily make my way around the room and slip in and close the door.

I had only just closed the door and was fiddling with the lock when it happened. I started to shit.
I ran to the toilet, dropped my pants, spun around and lifted the lift all in smooth motion but I was too late.

Shit came flying out of my ass, ending up on my underpants, legs, the floor and down the side toilet.
No…. no no no!!!!!! *sobbing*
I couldn’t believe it and was frozen for about 5 seconds, for the first time in my life I just crapped my pants – and in school.

I finished up but there was mess everywhere and my underpants were beyond recoverable.
There were no proper bins in the room either, so I had to stuff them into this little side bin for the paper towel when drying your hands.

When I had just done this there was a knock at the door and my heart sank. My year level coordinator was banging on the door demanding to know who was in there. “….ill be just a minute!”

I was panicking and was trapped. Surely with the attention my coordinator was drawing banging and yelling on the door everyone would be watching, waiting to see who just got busted.

I couldn’t, and wouldn’t accept being caught and known for the rest of my school life as the kid who shat his pants. Plus the room was destroyed. Shit on the floor, shit all over the toilet, shit filled underpants in the bin – I would never be able to live it down!

Luckily there was a small window at the top of the room and being a skinny, tall guy and desperate I managed to climb up, open and fall out the window (almost handing on my neck by the way)

I gathered my self and stealthy made my way around the building and re-entered the common room. I had to make it look like I wasn’t a suspect or suspicious at all. To my shock there was a big crowd, excited to see who was in the room and wouldn’t open up. I casually walked up to a friend and asked what was going on. He explained and also mentioned that the teachers had gone to get a key.

Well when they opened it my heart was racing and there was a “OMG WHAT THE HELL!!” moment. Followed by cursing and my coordinator running out holding his mouth.

Needless to say that caused quite a stir especially since they never found out who it was and I was damn lucky.

Grade A ninja material right there. You did well

 

[Replicant]

Awesome story

I never understand why some college have this rule where certain toilets are only for mature students. It's like their need to pee/take crap is bigger than everyone else's.

 

[Jangaroo]

I never understand why some college have this rule where certain toilets are only for mature students. It's like their need to pee/take crap is bigger than everyone else's.

I know some schools do this since most students tend to make a mess in the stalls. They either don't put up the lid or don't bother flushing the toilet. Seniority is supposed to bring "maturity," thus the bathroom privileges. I think it's stupid personally.

 

[Lion Heart]

Couple years ago.

Was at the video store with friends when the shit I was holding all day was pokin through. This thing was coming out within 3 minutes tops. Luckily my friend lived about 100 meters away so I began to push them out the door. They were walking slow to the house so I yelled "FUCK RUN YOU ASSHOLES". I made it sound like it was a number 1, not a number 2.

I got to his house, ran up the huge flight of stairs, opened the bathroom door, pulled my pants down, started running to the toilet....and left a streak of shit on the way. FUUUUUCK. I was in the bathroom for a good 30 minutes....my friends tiles also had small divots in them that stored the shit like it was winter. Im sure the shit is still lodged in those tiles, dry and uncrushable.

They never asked me why I took so long but my god, his mom walked in right after I came out. I couldnt look at her for days.

 

[Karl007]

You're like Superman! You shit all over, vanish from the room, then you show up like Clark Kent asking people what happened.

Brilliant.

LOL!!

:lol :lol :lol

 

[permutated]

As soon as I read the thread title I knew who the OP was. :lol

 

[Youta Mottenai]

I know some schools do this since most students tend to make a mess in the stalls. They either don't put up the lid or don't bother flushing the toilet. Seniority is supposed to bring "maturity," thus the bathroom privileges. I think it's stupid personally.

No you´re correct. Having studied with medicine and nurse students, I can say that this is bs. And worse, girls from my class were shocked about how "cleaner" men´s wc were compared to women´s.

But the best thing is finding that wc nobody uses. There were three at my university, they were always clean, empty and you could calmly take your dump with nothing but your own gasses breaking the relaxing silence.

 

[Slayer-33]

Here's a post on GAF that I actually saved to Microsoft Word because it was so epic. I believe Orin GA is the author.

Oh my GOD LOL..


Kar007

AWESOME as well man lol

 

[EatChildren]

Thread revival delivers.

Bravo good sir. A bard's tale for the ages.

 

[Eagle 209]

I've never actually not made it. But I have come to the conclusion that their is some sort of mental mechanism that creates an inverse relationship between the urge and proximity of the shitter. The closer you are to it, the more you have to go and the more panicked and convinced that you won't make it you become. The worst is when you bust loose just before ass meets seat and are not quite sure if that first volley will hit the target. Very tense times.

 

[Timedog]

I still have pics of my awesome toilet bowl explosion on my camera but no way to get them to my computer

 

[Kozak]

One time I did a little smear in my underpants and just threw em away and went freeballing. To make matters worse I was wearing shorts.

not that great

 

[SpectreFire]

I just had to resurrect this thread now that I’m able to post so I could share my own horrific story:

A few years ago when I was still in high school in my senor years I too shared the same fate as many others here who ‘crapped their pants’

It was your average boring day at school and I was enjoying my lunch break when I felt the urge to shit.
The past few days I hadn’t been feeling too well as the flu was going around my school and I had picked up on it as you do with people coughing and sneezing around you all day.

So anyway I felt the urge to shit and since I didn’t really want to waste my lunch break hanging out with my friends I tried to put it off. Well 20 minutes past and the feeling started to get worse and worse to the point where I was almost feeling pain. Oh god I have to shit NOW.

I excused my self from my friends making up an excuse that I needed to get some stuff from my locker and proceeded to power walk to the toilets. Sadly when getting there all the cubicles were occupied. Fuck. I left and made my way to the other toilets at the end of the school where the younger kids went but alas, they were taken as well. DAMN IT. Shit was getting serious and I knew that this wasn’t going to be your ordinary shit – it was diarrhea

I had two choices, wait for a toilet or go to the toilet in our common room for the older students.
Now this common room toilet was off limits to students. It wasn’t supposed to be used as a substitute for the other toilets and the coordinator had cracked it at people using it. Well I had no choice so I decided to go for it, id just take the punishment if caught or whatever.

My insides were hurting, the shit was pushing up against my asshole and It felt it was about to come out. I felt sick.
Walking fast / jogging I made it to the common room. There were only a few people inside and I manage to stealthily make my way around the room and slip in and close the door.

I had only just closed the door and was fiddling with the lock when it happened. I started to shit.
I ran to the toilet, dropped my pants, spun around and lifted the lift all in smooth motion but I was too late.

Shit came flying out of my ass, ending up on my underpants, legs, the floor and down the side toilet.
No…. no no no!!!!!! *sobbing*
I couldn’t believe it and was frozen for about 5 seconds, for the first time in my life I just crapped my pants – and in school.

I finished up but there was mess everywhere and my underpants were beyond recoverable.
There were no proper bins in the room either, so I had to stuff them into this little side bin for the paper towel when drying your hands.

When I had just done this there was a knock at the door and my heart sank. My year level coordinator was banging on the door demanding to know who was in there. “….ill be just a minute!”

I was panicking and was trapped. Surely with the attention my coordinator was drawing banging and yelling on the door everyone would be watching, waiting to see who just got busted.

I couldn’t, and wouldn’t accept being caught and known for the rest of my school life as the kid who shat his pants. Plus the room was destroyed. Shit on the floor, shit all over the toilet, shit filled underpants in the bin – I would never be able to live it down!

Luckily there was a small window at the top of the room and being a skinny, tall guy and desperate I managed to climb up, open and fall out the window (almost handing on my neck by the way)

I gathered my self and stealthy made my way around the building and re-entered the common room. I had to make it look like I wasn’t a suspect or suspicious at all. To my shock there was a big crowd, excited to see who was in the room and wouldn’t open up. I casually walked up to a friend and asked what was going on. He explained and also mentioned that the teachers had gone to get a key.

Well when they opened it my heart was racing and there was a “OMG WHAT THE HELL!!” moment. Followed by cursing and my coordinator running out holding his mouth.

Needless to say that caused quite a stir especially since they never found out who it was and I was damn lucky.

Jesus Christ!

You're one hell of a man.

 

[roosters93]

I've never actually not made it. But I have come to the conclusion that their is some sort of mental mechanism that creates an inverse relationship between the urge and proximity of the shitter. The closer you are to it, the more you have to go and the more panicked and convinced that you won't make it you become. The worst is when you bust loose just before ass meets seat and are not quite sure if that first volley will hit the target. Very tense times.

Yeah I find this with pissing. I've luckily never crapped or pissed my pants but I've come close a few times.

 

[Borman]

No you´re correct. Having studied with medicine and nurse students, I can say that this is bs. And worse, girls from my class were shocked about how "cleaner" men´s wc were compared to women´s.

But the best thing is finding that wc nobody uses. There were three at my university, they were always clean, empty and you could calmly take your dump with nothing but your own gasses breaking the relaxing silence.

Have totally found a few of those, luckily they are spread out pretty decently so I know which I can hit when I cant make it to the 'primary target' hah.

 

[Black-Wind]

Ok, the best one I can think of was from waaayyy back . . . (flashing back time!)

This is one of the few things I can remember from when I was younger then 10-8. I was in 2nd grade and I was wearing over-alls cause they were sooo fucking cool back then to me. I was crippling shy back then, afriad to speak up or say anything that would draw ANY attention to myself (I have come a long way but Im still working on talking to the ladies ^_^).

And one day . . . I had that feeling. I HAD to take a shit. But I hated public restrooms (I think have a pretty big problem with germs) so I thought it would be best to wait it out for when I got home. After some time of hearing the "Waaaa Waaaa" sound from the teasher I looked up at the clock . . . it was fucking half way into the school day. Fuck, I thought it was close to ending (one thing I do remember about childhood was how fucked up time felt. Days could feel like weeks and weeks could feel like days or months and hours could feel like anything depinding on what your doing).

So I just sat there . . . for a good amount of time, letting the shit build up. Then I felt it was just too fare gone, the shit was right there and the wrong move could result in a true RL Shit Storm. I worked up the nerve to actually toss up my hand and ask to go cause I couldn't take it any longer. I got the lil wood pass thing and RAN. I ran as fast as I could to the bathroom, shit was going down to hole and it was a tight race!

Got the the bathroom, whiped open the door to a stall and what do I see? Fucker was nasty and clogged with paper. The only other one wasn't any better. Haveing waited soo long I couldn't take it BUT I refused to sit on those nasty ass sets. I had one choice . . . do the bend-in-shit over the bowl.

Heres were the overalls come in. They were big a sloppy soo I didn't want them to get dirty by touching the buttom of the outer bowl. I had to hold them at my knees and bend over at the same time . . . thought my ass on in the right position but I was wrong. Let the shit go and it all falls right in front of the bowl, some even touched my overalls.



So I just shitted on the floor, completely missing the bowl and there as bits of shit on my overalls. I wasn't about to touch that shit but I knew I had to get the fuck out of there before anyone came (we had doors where you could see someone's feet in a stall right when you walk in so there would be no hiding if someone came at that time). Someone DID come after I gather abit of my thoughts and I had to move my feet in front of the shit to cover it until they left.

Once they left I cleaned myself up and . . . left the shit right there. I mean, by the next day someone would have cleaned it up . . . right? Wrong, those halfass cleaners didn't clean the bathrooms often which I now know was why the bowl was soo nasty.

The next day story spread of the shit in one of the boys bathrooms seeing as you could see it under the stall the second you walked in.

That shit stayed there for atleast 2 months or so ( I mean that. That shit was there for a LOOONNNGG time). That was my most commonly used bathroom so every day when I took a piss I would have to look at my hidden shame when I opened the bathroom door.

No one knew whose shit that was and I would never tell.

 

[Night_Trekker]

Once they left I cleaned myself up and . . . left the shit right there. I mean, by the next day someone would have cleaned it up . . . right? Wrong, those halfass cleaners didn't clean the bathrooms often which I now know was why the bowl was soo nasty.

The next day story spread of the shit in one of the boys bathrooms seeing as you could see it under the stall the second you walked in.

That shit stayed there for atleast 2 months or so ( I mean that. That shit was there for a LOOONNNGG time). That was my most commonly used bathroom so every day when I took a piss I would have to look at my hidden shame when I opened the bathroom door.

No one knew whose shit that was and I would never tell.

:lol :lol

 

[adamsappel]

As soon as I read the thread title I knew who the OP was. :lol

Where's the rage, though?

 

[StormyTheRabbit]

I had to bump this thread. The following is one of the most painful experiences of my life.

WHEN I COULDN'T CRAP MY PANTS OR ANYWHERE FOR THAT MATTER.

Reverse to 2 fridays ago...

Sunshine, birds singing, orange and yellow trees, ah fall. Today was an important day in my life. I was getting my wisdom teeth removed, one of the final steps into becoming an adult. A right of passage. AND PERCOCET AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I am on my way towards the orthodontist oh fuck it im not writing a story today. Basically I took all my percocet, which was meant to span a week, in 2 days. (Older habits caused this to happen) and it constipated me.

I went 10 days without shitting. Tried every kind of laxative in the book, literally. Anal suppositories, nothing worked.

Ended up going to the hospital where I got an enema and took such a shit that hades himself rose out from the 5 pound sea freighter I left in the hospital toilet to congratulate me.

Yes. 5 pounds. I weighed myself before and after the hospital visit.

Thus, I shit poopy water for about 2 days following. But my stars and stripes, I have never felt so relieved.

The only way I can describe the color of it is...well..Remember at the end of Predator when Arnold covers himself in mud to mask his body heat? Yeah, that color.

Fin.

 

[totowhoa]

I had to bump this thread. The following is one of the most painful experiences of my life.

WHEN I COULDN'T CRAP MY PANTS OR ANYWHERE FOR THAT MATTER.

Reverse to 2 fridays ago...

Sunshine, birds singing, orange and yellow trees, ah fall. Today was an important day in my life. I was getting my wisdom teeth removed, one of the final steps into becoming an adult. A right of passage. AND PERCOCET AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I am on my way towards the orthodontist oh fuck it im not writing a story today. Basically I took all my percocet, which was meant to span a week, in 2 days. (Older habits caused this to happen) and it constipated me.

I went 10 days without shitting. Tried every kind of laxative in the book, literally. Anal suppositories, nothing worked.

Ended up going to the hospital where I got an enema and took such a shit that hades himself rose out from the 5 pound sea freighter I left in the hospital toilet to congratulate me.

Yes. 5 pounds. I weighed myself before and after the hospital visit.

Thus, I shit poopy water for about 2 days following. But my stars and stripes, I have never felt so relieved.

The only way I can describe the color of it is...well..Remember at the end of Predator when Arnold covers himself in mud to mask his body heat? Yeah, that color.

Fin.

I know someone who didn't poop for a couple weeks. Laxatives and nothing worked. This person put on a latex glove and dug it out of their rectum.

 

[MThanded]

I had to bump this thread. The following is one of the most painful experiences of my life.

WHEN I COULDN'T CRAP MY PANTS OR ANYWHERE FOR THAT MATTER.

Reverse to 2 fridays ago...

Sunshine, birds singing, orange and yellow trees, ah fall. Today was an important day in my life. I was getting my wisdom teeth removed, one of the final steps into becoming an adult. A right of passage. AND PERCOCET AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I am on my way towards the orthodontist oh fuck it im not writing a story today. Basically I took all my percocet, which was meant to span a week, in 2 days. (Older habits caused this to happen) and it constipated me.

I went 10 days without shitting. Tried every kind of laxative in the book, literally. Anal suppositories, nothing worked.

Ended up going to the hospital where I got an enema and took such a shit that hades himself rose out from the 5 pound sea freighter I left in the hospital toilet to congratulate me.

Yes. 5 pounds. I weighed myself before and after the hospital visit.

Thus, I shit poopy water for about 2 days following. But my stars and stripes, I have never felt so relieved.

The only way I can describe the color of it is...well..Remember at the end of Predator when Arnold covers himself in mud to mask his body heat? Yeah, that color.

Fin.

wat

I know someone who didn't poop for a couple weeks. Laxatives and nothing worked. This person put on a latex glove and dug it out of their rectum.

wat

 

[StormyTheRabbit]

I know someone who didn't poop for a couple weeks. Laxatives and nothing worked. This person put on a latex glove and dug it out of their rectum.

That was my last option, I was going to do that until the pain got so bad that I literally couldn't move. So then I went to the hospital.

 

[totowhoa]

That was my last option, I was going to do that until the pain got so bad that I literally couldn't move. So then I went to the hospital.

This person cites this event as being one of the worst and most demeaning instances of their life, so good move, buddy! :lol

 

[kaskade]

I remember a couple of friends and I went Christmas shopping at the mall. I picked a few things up and we ate at the food court, my friends always talk about Wendy's Jr. Bacon Cheesburgers so I decided to get two and some fries with a drink. Big fucking mistake.

I started to feel the urges, not the normal have-to-shit-bad urges, the something-very-bad-is-about-to-happen urges. They weren't terrible but I felt them coming on so I decided to just ignore, them. I really didn't want to go to go in a public bathroom especially when I knew what was going to happen. As we were leaving JC Penny I warned my friends of the situation and they insisted I should just go. I really don't like to shit in public so I figure I could make it.

We get in the car and go, I was riding in the back seat. Now this mall is about 45-50 minutes away from my house, I figured I could make it. About half way home I was in full blown, holy shit mode. I contemplated stopping, the only place would be this Italian restaurant which is about 10 minutes from my house. After a very tough decision I couldn't just walk into a fancy restaurant and stink the place out. I had to shit so badly that I wasn't even sitting, I didn't have my seat belt on because of the pressure on my intestines.

I kept telling my friend to drive faster with my ass in the air the whole time. Then I started getting gas, and these farts were terrible. With the heat on in the car it actually smelled like I shit, I even thought I did a few times. I tried not farting because I knew that I may not be so lucky the next time. Then on the stretch to my house may be like a mile and a half long, it felt like 5. I got to my house, thank jesus the garage was open already, I didn't even drop the bags, I ran to the bathroom pulled my pants down and as soon as there was ass to seat contact I exploded. I had to be on the toilet for 20 minutes from the after aches. It was a burner too, not pleasant.


That had to be the closest call I've recently had.

 

[dr3upmushroom]

I've crapped my pants on plenty of occasions, some were in public.

 

[Great King Bowser]

Almost yesterday at football (soccer). Ran out of whey protein, so just drank a load of milk in the morning. Wreaked havoc on my bowels. Need a shit pretty much the entire game and then had the ball blasted at my stomach. :lol

Was quite fortunate I didn't involuntarily shat my pants at that point.

 

[totowhoa]

I've crapped my pants on plenty of occasions, some were in public.

Should have learned your lesson the first time, man!

While I haven't come close to crapping my pants in a while, I did have two really random incidents within a few weeks from each other about a month ago.

First: I was lying in bed quite naked, and I farted once or twice. Turns out they were pretty wet farts and I didn't realize it. I kind of rolled the juice around and got the sheets and my ass all nasty.

Second: Not poop, but I was drunk and was having an AWESOME dream about having the best piss of my life. I woke up with a smile on face, and realized I was peeing everywhere. Whoops.

 

[whitehawk]

Ended up going to the hospital where I got an enema and took such a shit that hades himself rose out from the 5 pound sea freighter I left in the hospital toilet to congratulate me.

Yes. 5 pounds. I weighed myself before and after the hospital visit.

 

[alterno69]

I've been close to shitting myself twice, both times it was a very painful experience.

First time happened in Cancun like 4 years ago. It had been a long day of drinking and eating as usual, after having a nice dinner at Mango Tango or something like that my family and i headed to Dady'o. As soon as we got there i my stomach let me know i was in for a ride, farts followed by incredible pain as i tried to resist it. I hate going to public bathrooms let alone a public bathroom in a fucking night club. Anyway i was miserable for about 1 hour until i knew i couldn't hold it anymore. I rushed to the bathroom and managed to find an empty stall, the moment i droped my pants i let out this massive monster, it was like halfway between a solid and diarreah, it didn't took more than 5 minutes and i was done. I basically filled the toilet with shit, you couldn't see any water anymore just a giant dump. I knew flushing was pointless so i just walked out of there as soon as i could.


The second time involves a bike ride through the city on a sunday morning, i'm to lazy to write it all but i had to hold that shit for more than an hour before i got home to make the delivery, man i felt like my intestins were going to explode and shit was going to come out from every orifice in my body.

 

[goldsoundz]

Why has this thread disappeared for the last two months? I remember reading the stories in here over the summer and dying, and the new contributions are just as great. I wish I could say that I had some memorable experiences--actually I don't--to add to this fine thread. Don't ever let this thread go into hiding for this long again! I've had to wipe the tears from my face every time I've been here.

 

[Snuggles]

Last summer, I semi-shat my pants after eating one of those awful Subway pizzas. After eating, I went out side for a smoke...I felt like I had to pass gas so I "pushed" it out but I ended up squiring out liquid shit that soaked the back of my pants and ran down my leg. It was like ..... : o .....
Luckily, no one noticed but I had to go home immediately to change my drawers and feel ashamed of myself.

 

[Rayo]

Where is timedog? more dramatic readings please

 

[goldsoundz]

I am literally screaming. Punching my steering wheel like Ripley from Alien "COMMON YOU BITCH!!!" I only had one more exit to go.

I just about vomited from laughing so hard at that line.

 

[brandonh83]

Marching band competition. 2000. Junior year of high school.

Oh, hell.

I was at a competition in southern Kentucky that year, sometime in October. So this has been exactly 9 years ago almost and as far as I'm concerned, the longer ago the better. Anyway, I don't exactly remember the details concerning what I ate to cause this; but our usual band trip stops were at fast food places and I remember eating at Wendy's a lot during trips, so perhaps there. It's probably, oh sometime before noon when we arrive in the town of the competition and then eat, because I can't remember ever performing earlier in the day. We eat, go on to the school, change out, get everything ready, and then do some small exercises, music warm-ups which consisted of putting a lot of warm air through the instruments to keep the keys from sticking, and so on. This was already very taxing on my lungs and stomach, of course.

Then I start to feel it. An epic burning sensation in my lower stomach, right at the waste-line. Yeah, that feeling. When you feel that you know it's not going to be a simple, solid pass. I tried to ignore it and managed to keep the shit at bay for a couple of hours because that's how long we usually practiced. I thought, well, as long as I can make it through warm-ups I can go find a bathroom inside the school we were at. It had happened before; a lot of it comes from being slightly nervous, or anxious because like anything competitive you get knots in your stomach in anticipation of how good or bad you're going to do. Well, I had shit this time instead. I make it through warm-ups without much of a problem. It hurt like hell and I got that sick feeling but it didn't get worse than that if I recall. We get a 15 minute break before my director tells us that we're going to head up to the stands to cheer on other bands while we wait to begin and that he didn't want us to separate too bad because of the amount of people there and all the rules and whatnot. I'm like whatever, 15 minutes should suffice if I hurry.

I head up to the school. Go through the front doors. Shit is starting to knock at the door, tired of waiting at the doorstep. I'm like chill bitch and I head in seeking restroom paradise. I was envisioning palm trees painted on the stalls and so forth. I turn a couple of hallways, people clearly noticing that I was in some kind of hurry. I couldn't find anything though. It was weird. They are generally located at the end of hallways near stairs, but... I couldn't find a damn one. I run into someone who just looked important to me so I asked him if he knew where the restrooms were. This is when I started to panic. He looked at me with an unfortunate expression which pushed it on a bit further. He then revealed that the restrooms were upstairs, but that a lot of bands were using them to change in and out of their uniforms. I'm like whatever, surely I can just wait until someone comes out. I really didn't care about making a shit-scene in a room full of dudes that I didn't know because I didn't really care at that point. Sometimes I can be shit-shy, just not today.

I penguin my way up some stairs and walk through a door into a hall. There they were. Tons of people filling the hallway. I make my way through them until I get to the end of the next hall, and lo and behold, a restroom! Finally. As I approach, I started to see my life slowly flashing before my eyes. There were so many people waiting to get in. Our band actually just changed back at our school because the drive wasn't that far. But here, it was so incredibly crowded that it took me a while just to find the restroom. And there was no getting in. There was a line of dudes coming out that wrapped around the hallway. It was ridiculous; I'd never seen anything like it. So, what next? I sank off into a part of the hall that wasn't totally exposed to a bunch of people, and I stood there a moment saying prayers and trying to get it to go back in until I can figure out what to do.

I head over to the opposite side. It was a female restroom and there were tons of colorguard bitches patrolling the area. Shit. So I broke down and asked someone else. This time I said hey, if you desperately had to go to the restroom right now, where would you go? I remember this quite well as it was embarrassing and I'd never had to ask someone such a question before. He then said that there was a restroom actually at the stands where we were supposed to go in the first place. Son of a bitch. I head back to the stands, trying to keep my cool and I was waving cool air at my face because I thought I was going to pass the hell out from holding it so long. I get to the stands after about five minutes of immense torture. Same damn thing. I started to feel as if a higher power was just like, no, you are destined to shit yourself crazy and the impact from it will likely claim other lives than just your own. Okay, okay. Think. What can I do? All I could do, realistically, was just wait in line for a very long time, hoping that I can keep it in and keep myself alive until I'm able to inflict serious shit-damage to the porcelain beauty.

I wait. And wait. And wait. People tried to talk to me but I wasn't much of a conversationalist at the moment. Friends found me wondering what the hell I was doing. I was just bewildered that there was not one place I could just go relieve myself at this place. I mean it's a school. There should be restrooms everywhere. They were all full, apparently. I wait some more. Another friend comes down and tells me that we're regrouping to do more exercises. Oh my god. I either had to tell him to tell the director that I had to use the restroom really bad and that I can't make it, completely embarrassing myself, or tell him to act as if he'd never seen me and then explain that I didn't know about the regrouping later on. Whatever. About that time, here he comes walking by. "Come on guys!" and a bunch of other fellow members following him. He'd seen me and I had no opportunity to tell him. I knew right then that I was about to experience hell unlike anything else in the rest of my life.

A quick side-note: if you're thinking, god, why don't you just tell him in private that you really need to use the restroom? Sounds logical enough, but the thing is, there's always people around, everywhere, and he was a really eccentric guy who wouldn't ever detach himself away from the crowd. It's hard to explain, it's just a thing where you'd have to be there to understand. Competitions like that are an incredibly crazy and hectic event especially if you're participating. I'm going to cut the story down right here for length purposes, the fact that it's easy to imagine what happened next, and just drop the bomb, no pun intended.

I ended up marching our 10-minute performance while holding in raging shit. That's right. Complete use of pretty much every function in my body: legs, arms, stomach, lungs, the mind-- heavy concentration, trying to remember every note, every move, keeping the count going, everything involved. Which is already pretty mentally challenging to do, and extremely physical. Pretty much impossible to do while holding in what at this point felt like molten lava moreso than anything. It took every ounce of mental, physical, and spiritual energy to win this battle. I didn't even care how we did. The next 10 minutes were a blur. I was in massive amounts of pain. Terrified. Sick. Mind racing, feet moving, lungs working overtime because 98% of all my energy was dedicated to my asshole muscles. But I made it. I did it. Awesome. Go me. I'm still breathing and functioning; it's cool. And then, the shit... subsided. Went away. Almost right after the performance. I almost cried. My first bout of relief in around five to six hours. Wow. Okay, so after that-- and not that I would know-- but apparently we did good. Really good. We were always pretty good, but not nearly as good as some of the bigger ones in the state. The shit came back a little bit later. We never made semi-finals or anything meaning that we wouldn't have to perform again and so it was just a matter of being able to be strong and continue holding it in until we get back, which was only about a 45 minute or less drive but I'd just be sitting on a bus making it a tad easier to hold it in.

Spoiler

We made semi-finals.

 

[-PXG-]

I had to bump this thread. The following is one of the most painful experiences of my life.

WHEN I COULDN'T CRAP MY PANTS OR ANYWHERE FOR THAT MATTER.

Reverse to 2 fridays ago...

Sunshine, birds singing, orange and yellow trees, ah fall. Today was an important day in my life. I was getting my wisdom teeth removed, one of the final steps into becoming an adult. A right of passage. AND PERCOCET AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

I am on my way towards the orthodontist oh fuck it im not writing a story today. Basically I took all my percocet, which was meant to span a week, in 2 days. (Older habits caused this to happen) and it constipated me.

I went 10 days without shitting. Tried every kind of laxative in the book, literally. Anal suppositories, nothing worked.

Ended up going to the hospital where I got an enema and took such a shit that hades himself rose out from the 5 pound sea freighter I left in the hospital toilet to congratulate me.

Yes. 5 pounds. I weighed myself before and after the hospital visit.

Thus, I shit poopy water for about 2 days following. But my stars and stripes, I have never felt so relieved.

The only way I can describe the color of it is...well..Remember at the end of Predator when Arnold covers himself in mud to mask his body heat? Yeah, that color.

Fin.

GOD DAAAAAAAAAAAMN :lol :lol :lol

 

[Costanza]

this...this needs to be more discussed

Indeed.

Holy shit.

 

[scoobs]

crapped myself when i was like 6 or 7 in a barnes and noble. Had to shit so bad but the bathroom was occupied and i couldnt hold it any longer. Shit my pants, got in the car and sat there with my entire family as if nothing had happened. In my head, I knew they could smell my shitty pants but nobody said a thing. When I got home I ran upstairs, finished shitting, took a shower, and with ninja-like sneekiness I went out to the garage and threw away my shit covered undies.

 

[Pho Antagonist]

When I was a young pre-pubescent lad, I always had a strange urge to shit whenever I stepped foot into a shopping mall. It might have been the anxiety of the inevitable boredom from having to wait around while my mom took forever to shop for things, or the fear of having to look at all the strange, ugly people that roamed that horrible place, or it might have even been the smell, that strange scent of unsold perfumes mixed with denim, musty carpet, and heavily waxed tile flooring. Whatever it was, it made me head straight to the restrooms and blast all over the toilets.

After this became a repeated ritual, I began to fantasize about getting out of the mall early by pretending that I couldn't make it to the restrooms in time, jumping out of my pants and ruining all the gaudy thug wear on the racks (JNCO was popular at the time) with my brown stream of partially digested froot loops and snickers.

Sadly though, my mom finally caught on that I hated the mall and stopped taking me.


But... someday I hope to fulfill my fantasy. Keep your eyes on the paper boys, cause this guy is saving up for a rainy day. And even if it ain't raining on that day, believe me, I'll make it rain.

Spoiler

poop

 

[-PXG-]

Alright....

I technically didn't shit IN my pants, but more so...on.

To make a long story short, I was in middle school (eight grade I think). Last class of the day, which was art class. Earlier that day, the furnace broke, so there was absolutely NO heat at all in the school. Normally, in a situation like that, everyone would be sent home. It was February, so yeah, it was cold as balls outside. Needless to say, everyone was pissed, wearing big ass jackets through out the day, and freezing to death.

Anyway, I ate something that really fucked with my stomach. It wasn't until the end of the day that I felt the poo choo train a comin'. I excuse myself to go the bathroom. Back then (not so much now) I was a germaphobe. I had to shit really bad, and didn't have time to painstakingly tear off toilet paper and put it on the seat. I refused to put my bare ass on that fucker. Other kids would piss all over the seats, plus it was REALLY fucking cold.

I decided to go aerial....I pulled down my pants and held my ass over the bow. Unfortunately, the consistency of my fecal projectiles were different than expected. Instead of being a nice, firm log, it was a torrent greenish brown slime. Looked like something straight out of Nickelodeon.

Well, everything went well right? NO! Not only did I miscalculate the kind of shit that came out, my aim was a little off. Instead of going into the toilet a planned, the toxic waste landed right into my fucking pants. I tried to wipe as much as I could out, but it was no use. The horrific stench had already seeped into the fabric. Thank goodness that was the last class of the day.

A few minutes after going back into the art room, one girl made a comment that "something smells like a wet dog:". I just kept it cool and said nothing. I was one of the best artist in the school (and still very artistic now). People would always come up to me and want to look at what I was going. I had to shoo people away in fear they would catch the smell. Fortunately, I don't think anyone noticed. My sense of smell is VERY sensitive. So, smelling my own anal miasma was not a very pleasurable experience.

After that, I went to my locker, got my stuff, and took the bus home as usual. As soon as I got home, I had to take another monster shit. After that, I (thoroughly) cleaned myself up and disposed the evidence of my shitty experience.

 

[tehvampire]

. I basically filled the toilet with shit, you couldn't see any water anymore just a giant dump. I knew flushing was pointless so i just walked out of there as soon as i could.

lol that must of been nasty for the next person
If you flushed would of the shit water overflowed onto the floor?

 

[IllusionaryWeaponry]

I had probably the worst dump experiences ever this August .

My 2 friends and I were at a local Japanese marketplace/resteraunt. We had just finished eating rice,noodles,beef, and things of that nature. For whatever reason (To this day im not sure what spurred this ) I started having really painful stomach cramps. The three of us sat at a table with my 2 friends having a conversation and I sat there silent in immense pain. I am not to keen at using public restrooms , but this was one of those times where the pain was just too incredible. I said to my friends " Hey be right back ". Of course, little did I this wouldn't be a few minute long experience.

As I walked to the bathroom I started getting pain in other parts of my body. Including my shoulders and legs.

All I can say is that this was probably the biggest and longest dump/diareah i've ever taken in my life. I literaly was in the bathroom for 50 minutes....I KID YOU NOT....I thought the pain would go away after a few minutes, but the pain didn't subside until I had left the bathroom.

I used 1 and a half toilet paper rolls and flushed at least 6 times. It seemed like an endless stream existed inside my body. At least 15 other people must have come in, taken a dump and left by the time I left. The worst part about it is that my friends, who wanted to leave, kept texting me, asking me where I was.

To make matters worse there was some very awkward moments while taking this dump. On 2 occasions, a father brought their daughter/son with them into the stall next to mine to use the bathroom. So while I was trying to release this noisy, retched, beast, the fathers were consoling their children using the toilet. In fact one of the children commented on how bad it smelt in the stall over.

Afterwards I was both physically and emotionally exhausted. When I met up with my friends they seemed shocked. I simply explained to them I would rather just not talk about it. They agreed and we left.

 

[numble]

Obligatory quote:
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=8275683&postcount=26

Psshh. That's nothing. I went without crapping for almost three weeks once when I was little, because I thought it was "fun" to "defeat" the urge to crap. Worst idea ever. The end result? A visit to the doctor to lubricate my asshole, over three hours of pushing and straining on the john before anything started showing itself, and then one of my parents had to physically, with hands ineffectually wrapped in toilet-paper, drag the hulking, rock-hard beast out. I KNOW what women go through when they give birth. So, er, the moral should be to eat lots of fiber, drink lots of water, and for the love of all that is good and holy, take a shit when your body wants to.

 

[Maximus.]

this thread is fuckin epic. Too many good laughs here, keep it up folks. Man i have some shitty experiences, but i dont think it can trump any of the good shit in here lol.

 

[rush777]

All in all, it hadn’t been a good day. Bad traffic, a malfunctioning computer, incompetent coworkers and a sore back all made me a seething cauldron of rage. But more importantly for this story, it had been over forty-eight hours since I’d last taken a dump. I’d tried to jumpstart the process, beginning my day with a bowl of bowel-cleansing fiber cereal, following it with six cups of coffee at work, and adding a bean-laden lunch at Taco Bell. As I was returning home from work, my insides let me know with subtle rumbles and the emission of the occasional tiny fart that Big Things would be happening soon. Alas, I had to stop at the mall to go Christmas shopping. I completed this task, and as I was walking past the stores on my way back to the car, I noticed a large sale sign proclaiming, “Everything Must Go!”. This was prophetic, for my colon informed me with a sudden violent cramp and a wet, squeaky fart that everything was indeed about to go. I hurried to the mall bathrooms. I surveyed the five stalls, which I have numbered 1 through 5 for your convenience:

1. Occupied.
2. Clean, but Bathroom Protocol forbids its use, as it’s next to the occupied one.
3. Poo on seat.
4. Poo and toilet paper in bowl, unidentifiable liquid splattered on seat.
5. No toilet paper, no stall door, unidentifiable sticky object near base of toilet.

Clearly, it had to be Stall #2. I trudged back, entered, dropped trousers and sat down. I’m normally a fairly Shameful Sh1tter. I wasn’t happy about being next to the occupied stall, but Big Things were afoot.

I was just getting ready to bear down when all of a sudden the sweet sounds of Beethoven came from next door, followed by a fumbling, and then the sound of a voice answering the ringing phone. As usual for a cell phone conversation, the voice was exactly 8 dB louder than it needed to be. Out of Shameful habit, my sphincter slammed shut. The inane conversation went on and on. Mr. Sh1tter was blathering to Mrs. Sh1tter about the sh1tty day he had. I sat there, cramping and miserable, waiting for him to finish. As the loud conversation dragged on, I became angrier and angrier, thinking that I, too, had a crappy day, but I was too polite to yak about in public. My bowels let me know in no uncertain terms that if I didn’t get crapping soon, my day would be getting even crappier.

Finally my anger reached a point that overcame Shamefulness. I no longer cared. I gripped the toilet paper holder with one hand, braced my other hand against the side of the stall, and pushed with all my might. I was rewarded with a fart of colossal magnitude — a cross between the sound of someone ripping a very wet bed sheet in half and of plywood being torn off a wall. The sound gradually transitioned into a heavily modulated low-RPM tone, not unlike someone firing up a Harley. I managed to hit the resonance frequency of the stall, and it shook gently.

Once my *** cheeks stopped flapping in the breeze, three things became apparent: (1) The next-door conversation had ceased; (2) my colon’s continued seizing indicated that there was more to come; and (3) the bathroom was now beset by a horrible, eldritch stench. It was as if a gateway to Hell had been opened. The foul miasma quickly made its way under the stall and began choking my poop-mate. This initial “herald” fart had ended his conversation in mid-sentence.

“Oh my God”, I heard him utter, following it with suppressed sounds of choking, and then, “No, baby, that wasn’t me (cough, gag), you could hear that (gag)??”

Now there was no stopping me. I pushed for all I was worth. I could swear that in the resulting cacophony of rips, squirts, splashes, poots, and blasts, I was actually lifted slightly off the pot. The amount of stuff in me was incredible. It sprayed against the bowl with tremendous force. Later, in surveying the damage, I’d see that liquid poop had actually managed to ricochet out of the bowl and run down the side on to the floor. But for now, all I could do was hang on for the ride.

Next door I could hear him fumbling with the paper dispenser as he desperately tried to finish his task. Little snatches of conversation made themselves heard over my anal symphony: “Gotta go… horrible… throw up… in my mouth… not… make it… tell the kids… love them… oh God…” followed by more sounds of suppressed gagging and retching.

Alas, it is evidently difficult to hold one’s phone and wipe one’s bum at the same time. Just as my high-pressure abuse of the toilet was winding down, I heard a plop and splash from next door, followed by string of swear words and gags. My poop-mate had dropped his phone into the toilet.

There was a lull in my production, and the restroom became deathly quiet. I could envision him standing there, wondering what to do. A final anal announcement came trumpeting from my behind, small chunks plopping noisily into the water. That must have been the last straw. I heard a flush, a fumbling with the lock, and then the stall door was thrown open. I heard him running out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

After a considerable amount of paperwork, I got up and surveyed the damage. I felt bad for the janitor who’d be forced to deal with this, but I knew that flushing was not an option. No toilet in the world could handle that unholy mess. Flushing would only lead to a floor flooded with filth.

As I left, I glanced into the next-door stall. Nothing remained in the bowl. Had he flushed his phone, or had he plucked it out and left the bathroom with nasty unwashed hands? The world will never know.

I exited the bathroom, momentarily proud and Shameless, looking around for a face glaring at me. But I saw no one. I suspect that somehow my supernatural elimination has managed to transfer my Shamefulness to my anonymous poop-mate. I think it’ll be a long time before he can bring himself to poop in public — and I doubt he’ll ever again answer his cell phone in the loo. And this, my friends, is why you should never talk on your phone in the bathroom

.”
:lol :lol :lol :lol

I fucking died reading both the OP and this, just great.