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LGBTQIA+ | OT7 | ~First comes love, then comes marriage~

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A

Akara

Banned
Interface23 said:
(No Akara I'm not going to try to get back with her for the reasons you said as much as I wish I could heh).

I just find it weird that we both are kinda sick in almost the same way at the same time. I have the worst luck with health and people...
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lol :)
You'll rise up and stronga don't worry ;)
 
I

Interface23

Member
Akara said:
lol :)
You'll rise up and stronga don't worry ;)
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Yea and anyways she knows where I stand pertaining to us and we both need to worry about getting healthy and she's not going to do well emotionally with this surgery if the Dr has to make it where she can't have kids, she's already worrying about if I have cancer or not... So us? That's unimportant at the moment
 
H

Henchmen21

Banned
berzeli said:
Regarding the entire debate around thirst;

I think "all gay men are thirsty" is a largely incorrect stereotype, the origins of which are incredibly easy to understand. Surprisingly much of the (male) gay liberation movement has been about breaking the stigma of male-male sex, so since the publicly visible movement deals with the topic of sex, sex becomes a thing associated with being gay (and male).

I also don't think this thread is thirstier than any other as such, just take a look at threads whenever a reasonably attractive woman pops up during a football game, or since we're on gaf, look at the reaction in the crowd when Jade Raymond walked out on stage. The larger (male) gay community is not worse horndogs than others, sex and gayness is just in the public consciousness in a more explicit way.
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Sorry but I disagree. There is a huge part of our community that wants sex and nothing more. Look at sites like Grindr or Growlr or the like. Most of them are used as nothing more than hookup sites. Can you say the same thing for str8 ones like Tindr? A lot of us unfortunately bury our heads in the sand about this. We're so busy trying to get the world to see positive portrayals of us that we overlook or ignore the negative ones.
 
S

Sai-kun

Banned
once again

i live!

Henchmen21 said:
Sorry but I disagree. There is a huge part of our community that wants sex and nothing more. Look at sites like Grindr or Growlr or the like. Most of them are used as nothing more than hookup sites. Can you say the same thing for str8 ones like Tindr? A lot of us unfortunately bury our heads in the sand about this. We're so busy trying to get the world to see positive portrayals of us that we overlook or ignore the negative ones.
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have you actually used tinder? it might not be obvious, but all the straight male friends i have that use it pretty much only use it for sex.
 
3

3phemeral

Member
Seems everyone is taking advantage of Star Wars.

NSFW

Henchmen21 said:
Sorry but I disagree. There is a huge part of our community that wants sex and nothing more. Look at sites like Grindr or Growlr or the like. Most of them are used as nothing more than hookup sites. Can you say the same thing for str8 ones like Tindr? A lot of us unfortunately bury our heads in the sand about this. We're so busy trying to get the world to see positive portrayals of us that we overlook or ignore the negative ones.
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I agree. The difference between berezeli's example and the gay community is that it's easily reciprocated. Men will objectify other men and feel perfectly content with taking that to a physical level, even in situations where they state they're not looking - they're happy to oblige if the bait is hot enough. Women aren't usually receptive to that behavior, so it's almost always one-sided.
 
K

Kevyt

Member
kirbyfan407 said:
Oh? I can think of so many things this could be suggesting. Explain?
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Well the date wasn't boring or bad but the guy came off as a bit desperate, saying many things that are just kind of a bit too much in my opinion, lol. He talked about some of his kinks and things we could do which I just found hilarious but a bit too much at times.

However it's fair to say that he did apologize and said that he was half joking half being serious. It was funny to me nonetheless.

Anyways, he seemed thirsty. I'm thirsty but not that thirsty lol. He's a great guy and really funny.
 
K

Kater

Banned
Isn't Tinder also something that you use for fun and not for commitment? The only site I know of where people look for something lasting is on sites like OKCupid.

Sai-kun said:
once again

i live!

have you actually used tinder? it might not be obvious, but all the straight male friends i have that use it pretty much only use it for sex.
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Oh you beat me.

Wb :3
 
D

Deleted member 465307

Unconfirmed Member
Seath said:
Well the date wasn't boring or bad but the guy came off as a bit desperate, saying many things that are just kind of a bit too much in my opinion, lol. He talked about some of his kinks and things we could do which I just found hilarious but a bit too much at times.

However it's fair to say that he did apologize and said that he was half joking half being serious. It was funny to me nonetheless.

Anyways, he seemed thirsty. I'm thirsty but not that thirsty lol. He's a great guy and really funny.
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Huh, is it normal to talk about kinks on a first date? That surprises me.

You ended that post pretty positively. Think you'll see him again?
 
H

Henchmen21

Banned
Sai-kun said:
once again

i live!



have you actually used tinder? it might not be obvious, but all the straight male friends i have that use it pretty much only use it for sex.
Click to expand...

Yes all your straight male friends use it that way but how many women use it that way? And even the str8 guys who use it for sex rarely succeed in that regard. It's almost a given that the sites I listed earlier are nothing but hookup apps and nothing more.

It's not the apps in particular that I was referring to, they were just examples of how our community will too easily jump into bed at the drop of a hat.
 
U

umop_3pisdn

Member
Henchmen21 said:
Yes all your straight male friends use it that way but how many women use it that way? And even the str8 guys who use it for sex rarely succeed in that regard. It's almost a given that the sites I listed earlier are nothing but hookup apps and nothing more.

It's not the apps in particular that I was referring to, they were just examples of how our community will too easily jump into bed at the drop of a hat.
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I didn't know our community could fit in a bed, much less hop into one so quickly.
 
K

Kevyt

Member
kirbyfan407 said:
Huh, is it normal to talk about kinks on a first date? That surprises me.

You ended that post pretty positively. Think you'll see him again?
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I'm not sure about kinks on first date. I certainly wouldn't though.

We made each other laugh so I guess that's a good thing. We probably will go out again.
 
D

Deleted member 465307

Unconfirmed Member
Seath said:
I'm not sure about kinks on first date. I certainly wouldn't though.

We made each other laugh so I guess that's a good thing. We probably will go out again.
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Yay! Keep us posted!
 
V

VegiHam

Member
"You're gay dead if you wear unattractive clothes because men should be sexy or they're not valuable members of the community anymore. Oh but gays totally aren't thirsty though."
 
D

Deleted member 465307

Unconfirmed Member
Since I didn't really voice an opinion, allow me to say that I don't really care what people wear. I dress terribly on most days and wore clothes with an excessive number of pockets for a long time. I'm pretty sure most responses here are written in a joking manner.

I mean, if what you're going to doesn't have a dress code or expected level of attire, then I think it doesn't really matter. I say wear what makes you comfortable, what you think looks good, what you can afford, and what expresses you best, and then own that.
 
C

CornBurrito

Member
Henchmen21 said:
Yes all your straight male friends use it that way but how many women use it that way? And even the str8 guys who use it for sex rarely succeed in that regard. It's almost a given that the sites I listed earlier are nothing but hookup apps and nothing more.

It's not the apps in particular that I was referring to, they were just examples of how our community will too easily jump into bed at the drop of a hat.
Click to expand...

Unless I misread, Berzelli was talking about gay and straight MEN. And I think he is absolutely correct.
 
B

berzeli

Banned
Henchmen21 said:
Sorry but I disagree. There is a huge part of our community that wants sex and nothing more.
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First of all as was already pointed out by Corn:

CornBurrito said:
Unless I misread, Berzelli was talking about gay and straight MEN. And I think he is absolutely correct.
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Secondly, I wasn't talking about sexual behaviour but rather the vague as fuck concept of 'thirst' and how gay men aren't more 'thirsty' than other groups. And if we're going to discuss women, a look at Buzzfeed, Pinterest, tumblr, or any other online community frequented by women will more often than not illustrate that the concept of 'thirst' extends even to them. It is however quite hard to find a quantitative way to measure 'thirst' amongst different groups.

And now for this bullshit:
Henchmen21 said:
Look at sites like Grindr or Growlr or the like. Most of them are used as nothing more than hookup sites. Can you say the same thing for str8 ones like Tindr? A lot of us unfortunately bury our heads in the sand about this. We're so busy trying to get the world to see positive portrayals of us that we overlook or ignore the negative ones.
Click to expand...
Henchmen21 said:
It's not the apps in particular that I was referring to, they were just examples of how our community will too easily jump into bed at the drop of a hat.
Click to expand...

There hasn't been a lot of research on Tinder so it's hard to find hard data, the app has been blamed for a spike in STDs, but things aren't that simple. There is enough evidence to support the notion that women do indeed use Tinder for hookups (it's often called a hookup app <- sorry for including a bunch of stupid opinions in that list) and to suggest that they aren't without any evidence backing that claim is silly.

Now as for what hookup culture actually entails; yet again it's hard to find good quantitative data. The best publicly accessible article I found is in a condensed form here (the site has a link to the full thing). There are some problems with the article, most notable that it is from early 2013 which mostly precedes the reign of Tinder. It does however contain this:
Further, the findings that a majority of both men and women are motivated to engage in hookups, but often desire a more romantic relationship, are consistent with a nuanced perspective that takes into account changing social scripts, new patterns of development, and the cross-cultural and biological centrality of the pair-bond (Fisher, 1992; Gray & Garcia, 2013).
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(emphasis mine)

Now I'm not sure what your metrics for "too easily jumping into bed" are, but I can only apologise on behalf of all men who have sex with men for not living up to your standards (which since you didn't bother explaining them I'm going to assume that they are 100% objective and correct obv.). If I supposedly need to pull my head out of the sand, I have an inkling from whence you need to pull yours from
 
U

User 73706

Banned
VegiHam said:
"You're gay dead if you wear unattractive clothes because men should be sexy or they're not valuable members of the community anymore. Oh but gays totally aren't thirsty though."
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To be fair, I'm a pansexual that wore nothing but cargo shorts from the ages of 6-13 in order to have enough room for my DS, keys, phone, wallet, etc. so I understand what harm they can do to someone. I wouldn't want anyone gay or straight wearing cargo pants / cargo shorts unless they were on Deadliest Catch or some shit. Also, speaking from a utilitarian perspective, there's way more fashionable ways to lug around shit: bags, purses, etc. I can maybe understand if a woman didn't want to carry around a purse, what with lady pockets being nonexistent and all.

Cargo shorts were the only things big enough to carry this around:

IMG_6137_grande.jpg
 
G

Grakl

Member
VegiHam said:
"You're gay dead if you wear unattractive clothes because men should be sexy or they're not valuable members of the community anymore. Oh but gays totally aren't thirsty though."
Click to expand...
You're taking this way too seriously, we're just having fun talking about cargo shorts

I've never used the term gay dead in a serious way before, either
 
S

Sai-kun

Banned
wow, racing games in destiny

just the kind of content i'm trying to get in my raid-progression-dependent first person shooter

i love video games
 
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