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Transgaf: 'cause boys will be girls (and vice versa)

Hop

That girl in the bunny hat
Re: names- I have so much trouble naming anything, much less myself. I let my friends pick one for me. My middle name's probably gonna be what my parents would've named me if I was born physically female. They would've gotten the first name if they were supportive.

Re: therapists- My first was a family therapist and was horrible. My second specialized in sexual/gender issues and was awesome. The one at my college is... ok.

Re: hormones- I've seriously considered doing spiro on my own. Right now my primary focus is not getting more masculine.

Re: Jet Grind Radio- stop changing your avatar. :p
 

FoneBone

Member
Are there any FTMs in this thread? I've always found it a little weird that, while I'm pretty sure transwomen are more common than transmen, my college had significantly more of the latter, and I've met far more of the latter here in NYC. Maybe it's just my social circles...
 

mollipen

Member
mantidor said:
For now I will start with just one: the name change. How hard it is? your name is practically hardwired since birth, and it becomes such a big part of you that changing it is almost like being someone else. Yes, changing your gender is huge, but still as I understand it you are not becoming someone else, you are just basically accepting who you are and with whatever help current medical technology can give you, you modify your body to get there as close as possible. I don't see a name change fitting in that picture.

I feel not one shred of connection to my real name. I didn't particularly like is as a child, I felt even less enthusiastic about it as a teenager, and I've now gotten to the point where I times I can't even write it or speak it in reference to myself.

I've about 95% decided on the name I'd use if I make the transition. I do a lot of character creation in my head for different stories and ideas that I have, so I've long be a fan of thinking about names and what goes into them. While I enjoy the more complex, beautiful, unique names, right from the start I knew that wouldn't be a road I'd want to go down - when you're trying your best to be convincing in your new life, things that'll make you stand out might not be the best option (at least for me). However, I came across a name that I just seemed to connect with, and more and more if I used a female name for anything in relation to me I found myself using that name.
 

Alfarif

This picture? uhh I can explain really!
lexi said:
You need their okay to start HRT, which is one of the first steps in transitioning. I felt like it was a job interview, and the experience really soured me on the whole 'GID is a mental illness' hoops we have to jump through like trained seals.

It just seemed so callous. Then again, I didn't really know what to expect when I was watching it.
 

Alfarif

This picture? uhh I can explain really!
Number 2 said:
<3s to you and everyone else that has done so. It might not seem like much but it really means a lot.

Wendi, just so you know, my wife loves your icon. :lol
 

Alfarif

This picture? uhh I can explain really!
NoRéN said:
I also knew a Trans person(is that appropriate) back in school. Worked at the library. People were always gossiping and whispering behind her back. Always bugged me. She wasn't hurting anyone. She was just trying to live her life. My last year there I don't remember seeing here. it's a shame if she left because of all the ignorant people.

People can be absolute dicks. When you get to that point where you don't really judge people, or you're capable of separating things like gender and sex and just see people as people, it can be really shocking to see people still close minded. I was reminded of that yesterday when someone made the comment that because I used a flowery lotion on my hands, it was weird. When I asked them why, they said it was because I'm a guy and I'm not supposed to do that. That struck me as odd... it's just a scent. It had nothing to do with where I place my genitals at the end of the day or how I view myself. Just an off handed comment like that seemed so out of place to me. Hm.
 

Alfarif

This picture? uhh I can explain really!
Android18a said:
I nearly went Bridget, then changed my mind and went Teddy, before changing to this <-



Go ahead punk, make my day. :lol

--

Any F2Ms here yet? =0

Where did you get that avatar, anyway?
 
My current one was pixelled by Sovanjedi about ten years ago :p

The Teddy-trap one was from Pixiv.

Also, suggestion: I know its nice to bump this thread, but posting 4 times in a row is a little excessive ^_^; Maybe just edit stuff into an earlier post if you can! =3
 
Not a Transgender, but I still support people's openess about it in this thread. Tremendous Respect to you all. :D

I can however contribute saying Ive had fantasies about doing a trap. Im still pretty bi-curious about what it would be like. Someday I may live it out.
 
Catching up a bit

Names- My middle name is Taylor, which I like better as a girl's name. It's kind of nice cause it's never really been used in reference to me (as a guy) but still feels like me. On the other hand, having an androgynous name could be a little weird through transition. Or it could end up being perfect, gah I'm rambling.

Therapists- I've only told two therapists about my GID. The first didn't really know much about the subject, and he and I weren't really clicking in the first place. My therapist now is awesome. I never felt like I was being interrogated, and she helped in coming out to my family. I'm just not that great in therapy cause I have such a hard time opening up.

Hormones- As I said before, I should be beginning HRT this week. I'm really excited about starting. I'll try and post updates over the next weeks about how they end up affecting me. Also, afaik about self-medding, Spiro in the short run isn't bad, but if the testosterone your body is losing isn't eventually made up for by estrogen then it can drastically weaken your skeletal structure. I think.

Wrath2X- Only if you look as good as Bruce Lee in that pic ;)
 

lexi

Banned
NewGamePlus said:
Hormones- As I said before, I should be beginning HRT this week. I'm really excited about starting. I'll try and post updates over the next weeks about how they end up affecting me.

Don't worry if within the first week at some point you break down into huge sobs and tears for NO reason at all. I had this happen in public.
 
lexi said:
Don't worry if within the first week at some point you break down into huge sobs and tears for NO reason at all. I had this happen in public.

I often do that in public anyway. I hate it when you're walking along and on the verge of crying, trying to avoid eye contact with people and look like you're just rubbing your eyes or something.
 
To anyone who has transitioned, what was it like wearing "opposite" sex clothing out in public for the first time? Did you wait until you felt like you were sure you passed or just go for it? I recently started wearing female pants out, but that's not too bizarre for Southern California. People probably just assume I have terrible taste in music. :lol
 

Cetra

Member
lexi said:
Don't worry if within the first week at some point you break down into huge sobs and tears for NO reason at all. I had this happen in public.

Totally, the six months I was on hormones a couple years ago I could cry at the drop of a hat. I loved it! :lol

Such an awesome release it was.
 

lexi

Banned
tehWillis said:
Totally, the six months I was on hormones a couple years ago I could cry at the drop of a hat. I loved it! :lol

Such an awesome release it was.

Yes! Exactly, and people look at me strange when I tell them how great it is.
 

Gaborn

Member
lexi said:
Yes! Exactly, and people look at me strange when I tell them how great it is.

Personally I'd never look at you strange for THAT. I seem to recall you were....... quite.... horny... for a bit there :p. Hormones can be a wonderful thing for some people.
 

lexi

Banned
NewGamePlus said:
To anyone who has transitioned, what was it like wearing "opposite" sex clothing out in public for the first time? Did you wait until you felt like you were sure you passed or just go for it? I recently started wearing female pants out, but that's not too bizarre for Southern California. People probably just assume I have terrible taste in music. :lol

You will be very self-conscious, I can pretty much guarantee that. If you don't give people a reason to give you a second glance, they won't (Unless you're smoking hot.) Random people are too wrapped up in themselves and their life to really take the time to scrutinize anyone but themselves.
 
lexi said:
You will be very self-conscious, I can pretty much guarantee that. If you don't give people a reason to give you a second glance, they won't (Unless you're smoking hot.) Random people are too wrapped up in themselves and their life to really take the time to scrutinize anyone but themselves.
Yeah, and I just try to remember that I don't normally care what other other people think, so why should I now? My therapist once said, "Don't they already think you're strange, now they'll just think your strange in a different way."
 
umop_3pisdn said:
shidoshi, thanks for the recommending Hourou Musuko. I've read through like six volumes just last afternoon :lol

I think I must have clicked through two pages at once a few times when I read that. I found it hard to follow what was going on, it seemed to jump from one scene to another without warning.

Maybe I was doing it wrong.
 
Android18a said:
I think I must have clicked through two pages at once a few times when I read that. I found it hard to follow what was going on, it seemed to jump from one scene to another without warning.

Maybe I was doing it wrong.

No, you weren't, I found the same thing. Either it's like an artistic liscense thing or the filehosting is a bit wacked. For a while I found the scene jumps a bit jarring, but now I don't mind them anymore... I'd say just to press on, the initial confusion seems to get cleared up down the line.
 

mollipen

Member
NewGamePlus said:
To anyone who has transitioned, what was it like wearing "opposite" sex clothing out in public for the first time? Did you wait until you felt like you were sure you passed or just go for it? I recently started wearing female pants out, but that's not too bizarre for Southern California. People probably just assume I have terrible taste in music. :lol

I've done it three times so far (beyond doing it for Halloween a couple of times), and I've done nothing in the way of transitions (as in, hormones and all of that). First time was at night, thought I was going to be scared to death, but then I saw myself after all of the preparations and was strangely calm about all of it. Second time was at day, freaked out a bit about that, but sucked it up and didn't let it bother me too much. Third time was also during the day, and this time was me going to event that was not trans/cross dresser-related. Was one of the first people to show up at the party, and was a little nervous at that point, but then as more people came and didn't make any big deal out of it I just kind of forgot about it all and had fun.
 

Gaborn

Member
lexi said:
No, she knows :p This isn't Jerry Springer :p

No, that time in the restaurant with all your friends thinking they're going to have lunch with "Lachlan" was very Jerry Springer :lol
 

water_wendi

Water is not wet!
Alfarif said:
Wendi, just so you know, my wife loves your icon. :lol
Thanks! i love that kitten in the flower pot picture. Its been my only avatar here :lol

NewGamePlus said:
To anyone who has transitioned, what was it like wearing "opposite" sex clothing out in public for the first time? Did you wait until you felt like you were sure you passed or just go for it? I recently started wearing female pants out, but that's not too bizarre for Southern California. People probably just assume I have terrible taste in music. :lol
ive yet to go out fully dressed yet but have been working up to it by doing smaller stuff to help boost my confidence. Its very true what lexi said about people being too concerned with themselves to be worried about you.

Also about the crying with the hormones.. the ease in which i could fully experience different emotions while being on hormones i miss a lot. i can still get there but it takes more.. i dunno.. coaxing? to hit the same levels. Its hard for me to put in words.
 

Cetra

Member
Number 2 said:
Also about the crying with the hormones.. the ease in which i could fully experience different emotions while being on hormones i miss a lot. i can still get there but it takes more.. i dunno.. coaxing? to hit the same levels. Its hard for me to put in words.

Guess it works differently for different people. I could cry like someone kicked my puppy for more than 30 minutes at times while on hormones. Now, I'm lucky to even get 30 seconds worth of tearing up in. It's frustrating as hell.

Should really get back to seeing my therapist. He agreed to give me a letter for hormones the last time I saw him. (The time I was on them I was self medicating.)Unfortunately I had some things come up that killed my finances and I had to stop seeing him because I just couldn't afford it.
 
For the non-trans people here: Would you date a trans-girl/guy? Or how would you respond if the person you'd been dating revealed they were trans after you'd been out a few times (and likely grown fond of already)? Would it change things for you, or would you find it irrelevant? Would you expect to be informed of your date being trans before you went out together, or wouldn't you mind if it came up later?

Curious as to how you guys think here. Sorry if this was asked and I missed it.
 

mollipen

Member
I swear, the avatar swapping going on now is tempting me to come up with a new one to match the current theme we've got going.
 
I would. If it's pretty(and witty), whatever. There is no gay.

also, I've had this avatar for years and I just found a few weeks ago that it's a TS! Always thought it was just another generic blond chick.
 
Android18a said:
For the non-trans people here: Would you date a trans-girl/guy? Or how would you respond if the person you'd been dating revealed they were trans after you'd been out a few times (and likely grown fond of already)? Would it change things for you, or would you find it irrelevant? Would you expect to be informed of your date being trans before you went out together, or wouldn't you mind if it came up later?

Curious as to how you guys think here. Sorry if this was asked and I missed it.

It wouldn't bother me at all, but I'm a pretty open person sexually. I'm not sure when I would be expect to be told by a date. Just like a lot of things about people that are very important and might impact whether you date them or not (religion, politics, etc) I think it makes sense if it comes out naturally and isn't told previous to dating. If the person has an issue with dating particular people it should probably be up to them to ask questions previously. Now, I think that the bedroom is probably a bit too late to be telling somebody as thats just asking for a bad situation. Its probably best to get it out early as you wouldn't want to date/get invested with somebody that has no interest in dating you would you?
 

water_wendi

Water is not wet!
tehWillis said:
Guess it works differently for different people. I could cry like someone kicked my puppy for more than 30 minutes at times while on hormones. Now, I'm lucky to even get 30 seconds worth of tearing up in. It's frustrating as hell.
It took me a very long time to get where i am emotionally. And im not even talking about any kind of trans experience or anything. As a person i was emotionally flatlined for almost a decade. During the time i had refused to get any help since i didnt think there was anything wrong with me. It was by pure chance that i started to open up and feel again, mostly with the help of hypnotherapy. i continually undergo sessions dealing with emotional feeling since i never want to slip back into that kind of isolation ever again.

Should really get back to seeing my therapist. He agreed to give me a letter for hormones the last time I saw him. (The time I was on them I was self medicating.)Unfortunately I had some things come up that killed my finances and I had to stop seeing him because I just couldn't afford it.
Sounds very much like myself. Its just a minor detour though. We'll both be back in the swing of things soon enough :)
 

wRATH2x

Banned
I don't know if I would date on to tell you the truth. I wouldn't mind having trans friends or even sleeping with an MtF. But I don't think I would date her.
 

whitehawk

Banned
Sorry, I haven't read through the thread, but I do have a question.

To me it seems like have an actual sex change operation (for your genitals) is a bad plan. Do many transgendered people get it, or do most keep their original genitals? I mean, can you even have an orgasm after the operation?

Android18a said:
For the non-trans people here: Would you date a trans-girl/guy? Or how would you respond if the person you'd been dating revealed they were trans after you'd been out a few times (and likely grown fond of already)? Would it change things for you, or would you find it irrelevant? Would you expect to be informed of your date being trans before you went out together, or wouldn't you mind if it came up later?

Curious as to how you guys think here. Sorry if this was asked and I missed it.
To be completely honest, I would not a date a transgendered girl. I feel bad saying it but, but I just couldn't do it. If I found out after we dated for a while, it would absolutely change things. I don't see how it couldn't. Of course I wouldn't just storm out right away, but I would eventually break it off.

Jeez, I really feel bad saying these things. I can see how hard it is for you guys :(
 

mollipen

Member
Android18a said:
Shidoshi, I got a new headband yesterday just like the one your avatar is wearing <3 a big red bow!

You should get one too!

I'm currently growing my hair out, and I was starting to get to a point where I needed to do something with it (my hair doesn't exactly behave), so I went out and got a pack of girl's hair bands for when I get out of the shower and need to keep my hair under control while it dries.

It's almost a bit pathetic how happy wearing such a simple little thing can make me. *laughs*


whitehawk said:
Sorry, I haven't read through the thread, but I do have a question.

To me it seems like have an actual sex change operation (for your genitals) is a bad plan. Do many transgendered people get it, or do most keep their original genitals? I mean, can you even have an orgasm after the operation?

Well, your question is actually somewhat answered in this thread. *heh* For one, yes, you can still have an orgasm after the operation, and I've heard from at least a couple male to female folks that they have completely wonderful orgasms after the surgery.


Wrath2X said:
I don't know if I would date on to tell you the truth. I wouldn't mind having trans friends or even sleeping with an MtF. But I don't think I would date her.

So you'll sleep with us, but won't make a commitment to us. I feel like a real woman already! *laughs*
 
shidoshi said:
I'm currently growing my hair out, and I was starting to get to a point where I needed to do something with it (my hair doesn't exactly behave), so I went out and got a pack of girl's hair bands for when I get out of the shower and need to keep my hair under control while it dries.

It's almost a bit pathetic how happy wearing such a simple little thing can make me. *laughs*

Tell me about it! I was sad yesterday because I couldn't get a new phone, but one new mascara later from the cosmetics counter and I was as happy as a teddy bear who just found a vault of honey pots.
 

Beardz

Member
Android18a said:
Questions.

Would you date a trans-girl/guy? Nope
Or how would you respond if the person you'd been dating revealed they were trans after you'd been out a few times (and likely grown fond of already)? I would get really mad.
Would it change things for you? Definitely
Would you expect to be informed of your date being trans before you went out together? Yup.
 

wRATH2x

Banned
shidoshi said:
So you'll sleep with us, but won't make a commitment to us. I feel like a real woman already! *laughs*
:lol I don't mean it in an offensive way mind you, I just can't.

I want to have kids with my future spouse, thats a huge priority for me. I also prefer born women, its just how I roll.
 
Pop On Arrival said:
I would. If she's pretty(and witty), whatever. There is no gay.
whitehawk said:
Sorry, I haven't read through the thread, but I do have a question.

To me it seems like have an actual sex change operation (for your genitals) is a bad plan. Do many transgendered people get it, or do most keep their original genitals? I mean, can you even have an orgasm after the operation?
Why do you think it's a bad plan? I just think you're too attached to you penis. :D
Wrath2X said:
I don't know if I would date on to tell you the truth. I wouldn't mind having trans friends or even sleeping with an MtF. But I don't think I would date her.
Oh I see how it is. Now I don't care even if you do look like Bruce Lee. :lol
Beardz said:
Would you date a trans-girl/guy? Nope
Or how would you respond if the person you'd been dating revealed they were trans after you'd been out a few times (and likely grown fond of already)? I would get really mad.
Would it change things for you? Definitely
Would you expect to be informed of your date being trans before you went out together? Yup.
May I ask why? Is it because you would feel deceived? What if you hadn't even kissed yet? What if instead of being trans the person told you they had HIV?
 
well, was thinking mainly of MTF people. I think i can just flat out say right now that I wouldn't date a ftm(and I'm pretty sure they wouldn't want to date me either). I'd be your bro, though!
 
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