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[Axion22]

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat upon reading this.

 

[Siebzehn50]

But yeah, you might want to go and get that checked out

 

[Monocle]

Sounds like you've got a tear. Go see a doctor and pray to all the gods of the firmament that you don't develop a chronic anal fissure. And don't bottom again until you have a clean bill of health.

By the way, anal sex isn't the only way to tear your anus. Constipation and epic diarrhea can do it too.

Spoiler

P.S. If someone asks you what you got for Christmas, better to keep this one on the down low.

Probably the best use of this pic I've seen so far. :lol

 

[Rewrite]

What a night... :lol

Just go to the doctor and tell him what's up. Better to be safe than sorry you know.

 

[Burli]

You'd rather tell NeoGAF than a professional Doctor who's trained not only to understand but to treat?

 

[i_am_ben]

God is punishing you for your circumcision thread.

 

[Mr Cola]

My Cousin is a doctor and trust me, they do not give a shit, like someone above said what pisses them off most is when people bullshit them about what happened trying to save face. And again anal sex is possibly the tamest thing they will hear all year.

 

[Ovid]

Why do GAF members post topics like this? Does GAF even have any resident MDs?

 

[I <3 Memes]

I have a friend who works in a hospital and does endoscopy. Just last week he had (NSFW)

Spoiler

one person who had to have a dildo removed from his ass and another person who had to have a gerbal removed.

The excuse is always "I slipped and fell."

You really should see a doctor. Don't worry about embarrassment when seeing a doctor, that's the last thing that should be on your mind.

It was a million to one shot doc. A million to one.

 

[SuperÑ]

Does your ear bleed?

 

[Nander]

It just means that you are becoming a woman, just like mommy...

 

[Chococat]

Sounds like you got an anal fissure- a tear in your colon. Go to the doctor- If it is minor, they will give you several days of suppositories and maybe some pain pills. No big deal.

Don't be embarrassed- doctors don't care- they are there to help.

 

[Koomaster]

If you're a big enough boy for sex, you're a big enough boy to tell your doctor about it.

 

[-viper-]

:lol my sentiments exactly.

 

[Always-honest]

you a girl?

 

[Stahsky]

you a girl?

He's on the rag!

 

[Replicant]

LOL, just tell the doctor that you think you get anal fissure due to over-straining at the toilet. Why? Because that's how most people got anal fissure. Due to straining over hard stool and not from getting stuffed with hard dicks.

 

[Truant]

He's off the vag!

Fixed

 

[smokeymicpot]

Even on Christmas gaf has odd threads.

 

[jakncoke]

I have a friend who works in a hospital and does endoscopy. Just last week he had (NSFW)

Spoiler

one person who had to have a dildo removed from his ass and another person who had to have a gerbal removed.

The excuse is always "I slipped and fell."

You really should see a doctor. Don't worry about embarrassment when seeing a doctor, that's the last thing that should be on your mind.

Wait people actually do the 2nd part? mind blown

 

[Majmun]

Just tell the doctor you fell on something accidentally.

 

[Ovid]

Fixed

Lol, good one.

 

[alr1ght]

Long story short: I had anal sex with a "big" guy yesterday, and I woke up today with a large red stain in my underwear. My bum is still sore and feels very tender. Has anyone else experienced this? I bottomed plenty of guys before, but I never had this happen to me.

 

[CrankyJay]

LOL, just tell the doctor that you think you get anal fissure due to over-straining at the toilet. Why? Because that's how most people got anal fissure. Due to straining over hard stool and not from getting stuffed with hard dicks.

I'm pretty sure a doctor can tell the difference between an anal fissure and a full on tear from a giant cock.

 

[shintoki]

Happens to me a lot. I shit blood for a few days, then it goes away. I'm all good after then.


Then it comes back a few weeks later.

 

[Stitch]

 

[tass0]

r u a girl

 

[Epic Tales of Penis]

r u a girl

You sound intrigued. Go ahead. Send him a PM.

 

[iamaustrian]

I bleed in my pants after I release a huge load.
but I have roids, so for me it's normal

might see a doc about that
you might get an anal fistula from a fissur

 

[Baron Doggystyle von Woof]

Did you had a pink sock?

 

[-viper-]

Just tell the doctor you fell on something accidentally.

accidentally fell on some cock

 

[shuri]

*Insert comedic "That's what you get for going against God's way" super religious gaf reply here *

 

[spindashing]

...Wait hold the fuck up.

The gerbil shoved into someone's ass is real? :lol I always thought it was fiction made into some sort of urban legend...

 

[Bitmap Frogs]

I got a fissure down there once from a really big nasty shit. One of those that's too big for the hole, if you know what I mean. Had to push hard, scrap with my finger whatever I could then repeat the process until it became small enough to pass through.

One of the worst experiences of my life.

Of course, I have a super-careful doctor and since my grand-grandfather or something had colon cancer she ordered a colonoscopy just to be sure there wasn't something else going on. Damn, that was one bad experience - you don't know pain until you have your whole colon full of compressed air.

 

[oxtailsoup]

Do you ever try to stick it back in and then let it out over and over?

))<>(( FOREVER

 

[DarkKyo]

And this my friends is one of the many reasons why anal sex is not for me.

 

[Drewsky]

This is a Christmas miracle!

 

[LocoMrPollock]

I was gonna post this an ad for chipotlaway, but this seems more serious than that.

But yeah, I'd be worried about infection and the like, you should probably get your ass checked out.

 

[Screaming Fist]

It just means that you are becoming a woman, just like mommy...

Lol :lol

 

[Kentpaul]

I only get skidmarks when i rub my asshole through my boxers

 

[Replicant]

I'm pretty sure a doctor can tell the difference between an anal fissure and a full on tear from a giant cock.

A cock is not a barbed wire. And I don't think OP was fucked by a cat. Hard dick can create a tear but as with any anal fissure, it starts out small and only gets bigger when it keeps getting irritated.

 

[-viper-]

I only get skidmarks when i rub my asshole through my boxers

do you not wash your ass

 

[PetriP-TNT]

Congratulations! You just got your first periods!

 

[Raistlin]

I'm pretty sure a doctor can tell the difference between an anal fissure and a full on tear from a giant cock.

This man speaks from experience

 

[Raistlin]

I got a fissure down there once from a really big nasty shit. One of those that's too big for the hole, if you know what I mean. Had to push hard, scrap with my finger whatever I could then repeat the process until it became small enough to pass through.

One of the worst experiences of my life.

Jesus Christ learn to eat right :lol

Of course, I have a super-careful doctor and since my grand-grandfather or something had colon cancer she ordered a colonoscopy just to be sure there wasn't something else going on. Damn, that was one bad experience - you don't know pain until you have your whole colon full of compressed air.

Tube to bladder from your pee hole ain't exactly a dance party either

 

[DarkKyo]

Man some of the people here are disgusting. Ugh.

What's with the surge in absolutely grotesque threads the past two weeks?

 

[Bitmap Frogs]

Jesus Christ learn to eat right :lol


Tube to bladder from your pee hole ain't exactly a dance party either

Right - I have been more careful with my eating habits... That's definitely something I don't want to go through again.

About the tube to bladder; guess what - after major surgery they removed it and since I wouldn't pee past the due time they had to do it live, without anaesthesia. Damn nasty stuff.

Anyways, happy bloody christmas!

 

[DR2K]

Could be an internal hemorrhoid. They tend to bleed a lot. If it bleeds like that for more than a week, you should see a doctor immediately.

Take a bath in warm water(aka sitz bath). Some preparation H to numb the pain. And you should be good.

If it's a fissure than you really need to go see a doctor.

 

[(._.)]

sounds like you had a nice Christmas eve, no?

 

[UraMallas]

Oh my fucking God, I have to take a dump. This feels horrible. I can't hold it in any longer.

Curse of the Gods