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Doctors warn against Gwyneth Paltrow's advice on putting jade eggs in your vagina

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Mman235

Member
Jade rods, duh.
Borosilicate-3-3-Glass-Jade-Green-Rod.jpg

Tried this and became a super-saiyan. Can confirm it boosts Chi.
 

Rest

All these years later I still chuckle at what a fucking moron that guy is.
There's so much here. So much. I guess I'll get started...

[...]jade eggs were used by “queens and concubines… to stay in shape for emperors[.]”
99.9999% chance of being completely made up bullshit. But let's move on.

[...]are “ideal for detox.”
Absolute bullshit. No doubt about it. It doesn't even mean anything.

Fans say regular use increases chi[...]
What does that mean?

[...]orgasms[...]
Could be. Not clown shit stupid enough to argue about.

[...]vaginal muscle tone[...]
Reasonable enough, could be true...

[...]hormonal balance[...]
Nope.

[...]and feminine energy in general[.]”
What does that even mean? Oh wait, it's meaningless and is a construct meant to pander to dumb people.
 

Ushojax

Should probably not trust the 7-11 security cameras quite so much
Does becoming a celebrity make you crazy?

No, but celebrities couldn't make any money by saying "don't stuff jade eggs in your vagina". By saying "stuff jade eggs in your vagina" they can either sell you the eggs or get paid by the people who do.
 
I was scrolling through movies earlier and saw the cover of Shakespeare in Love and I realized that every single time I see Gwyneth Paltrow from here on out I will be picturing a Jade egg clamped firmly in her yoni.

d3421i74487h112914.jpg
 

GreekWolf

Member
Isn't she the one who said it's impossible for her to relate to society, because we are poor and need to work for a living?
 

wedca

Member
I don't know but it is a smart thing for an ultra-wealthy person to think because they clearly can't relate to the struggles of the vast majority of people in society.
 

kittoo

Cretinously credulous
Who the hell calls a Vagina a Yoni?

Yoni is the Sanskrit word for vagina. I guess putting in some sanskrit words in articles about 'alternative medicine' is an effort to make them feel like legitimate ancient wisdom.

What a load of bullshit that article is though. What the hell is feminine energy?
 

jts

...hate me...
She is really strange.

I still remember that story where she tried to do some poverty tourism by eating on a very tight budget and then started to buy stuff like limes and eventually dropped out of the challenge claiming it was too hard lol.
 

Shadybiz

Member
Well...I could have probably told you that, and I'm not a doctor. Also, whenever you hear the word "detox," it's a safe bet that whatever you're being told is complete horseshit.
 
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