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Is your significant other not into games at all?

hbkdx12 said:
I don't expect her to game with me. I don't even expect her to like it or understand it but a simple amount of respect is really all i ask. I'm not suggesting it needs to be my way or the highway in terms of my game playing. I'm more than willing to curb a bit of game time to devote to spending time with my gf but as a couple, especially one that lives together, having alone time is healthy so why should it matter that A) i want and enjoy that alone time and B) i'm playing video games during that alone time?
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This sounds horrible! You really need to have serious conversation about this before it's too late. This just can't go on forever.
 
Heimbeck said:
Whenever I play a game I always need to be alone in the room, otherwise I just get really self-concious.
Maybe you could try that? I mean if she has any love for you I'm sure she wouldn't mind you playing an hour after work.
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I don't game in front of her at all. If we're not sleeping then we're usually spending time together in the living room. We have a second bedroom that has become the de facto man cave for me. So that's where i have my computer and ps4 at. So if she's home she'll be in the living room doing whatever while i'm in the room playing games but she has a lot of non verbal cues and behaviors that she goes through if i make the decision to go game for a few hours rather than doing something with her. So this usually equates to me not gaming at all when she's home let alone in front of her when she is

She claims she like mario Kart and mario party so i bought a Wii U that i had no previous interest in last thanksgiving hoping that she'd atleast respect my decision to game if i occasionally did it with her at her pace with a game she likes. I bought MK8 and about 7 other games and just last month bought mario party. We've only played MK8 and mario party. She refuses to try the other games (tropical freeze, scribblenauts, smash, nintendo party) and even when we do play its usually for about half an hr or so before she loses interest.

Inotti said:
This sounds horrible! You really need to have serious conversation about this before it's too late. This just can't go on forever.
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It's definitely not ideal but that being said, it's a relationship that's not destined to last very long unfortunately. The video game issue is just a microcosm of the things wrong in our relationship. Which has me wondering if i should seek out someone who likes video games for future relationships. I've also felt like i don't need someone who like video games but just someone who can respects that i do and not place any judgements on me. But after this live in experience that i'm having now, i feel like even the little bit that i'm asking for is probably still too much of a headache to deal with
 
She doesn't really play anything but she will feign interest sometimes which I appreciate :)

She likes to play GTA but she is terrible at it lol!
 
hbkdx12 said:
I don't game in front of her at all. If we're not sleeping then we're usually spending time together in the living room. We have a second bedroom that has become the de facto man cave for me. So that's where i have my computer and ps4 at. So if she's home she'll be in the living room doing whatever while i'm in the room playing games but she has a lot of non verbal cues and behaviors that she goes through if i make the decision to go game for a few hours rather than doing something with her. So this usually equates to me not gaming at all when she's home let alone in front of her when she is

She claims she like mario Kart and mario party so i bought a Wii U that i had no previous interest in last thanksgiving hoping that she'd atleast respect my decision to game if i occasionally did it with her at her pace with a game she likes. I bought MK8 and about 7 other games and just last month bought mario party. We've only played MK8 and mario party. She refuses to try the other games (tropical freeze, scribblenauts, smash, nintendo party) and even when we do play its usually for about half an hr or so before she loses interest.



It's definitely not ideal but that being said, it's a relationship that's not destined to last very long unfortunately. The video game issue is just a microcosm of the things wrong in our relationship.
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I see.
Maybe you should talk to her about it, tell her sometimes you would like to just play for a few hours instead.

hbkdx12 said:
It's definitely not ideal but that being said, it's a relationship that's not destined to last very long unfortunately. The video game issue is just a microcosm of the things wrong in our relationship. Which has me wondering if i should seek out someone who likes video games for future relationships. I've also felt like i don't need someone who like video games but just someone who can respects that i do and not place any judgements on me. But after this live in experience that i'm having now, i feel like even the little bit that i'm asking for is probably still too much of a headache to deal with
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Not to turn this into relationship advice, but you should just end it.
If you see no future there's no need to keep going, unless you have no other place to go?
 
Heimbeck said:
I see.
Maybe you should talk to her about it, tell her sometimes you would like to just play for a few hours instead.
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Oh, i definitely have. But it always boils down to me playing games for a few hrs is "too much" and she doesn't "understand how i can want to do that"
Heimbeck said:
Not to turn this into relationship advice, but you should just end it.
If you see no future there's no need to keep going, unless you have no other place to go?
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That's certainly the plan as it were. The only thing that's stopping me at the moment is the lease that we have on our apartment. I can ride it out until then. It's not like we hate each other or at each other's throats or anything. So it's not like my home life is volatile or anything. It's just a matter of lack of respect in regards to allowing me to be comfortable in my own skin
 
My wife hates games with a passion. She doesn't mind that I play them however other than RPGs. She finds them to be weird. It was a strain at first but has since become a non issue. We did decide mutually however to not introduce our children to games so they can focus on other things.
 
Hippopuncher12 said:
My wife hates games with a passion. She doesn't mind that I play them however other than RPGs. She finds them to be weird. It was a strain at first but has since become a non issue. We did decide mutually however to not introduce our children to games so they can focus on other things.
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Ugh, that sounds awful. How are you going to play games and not introduce your kids to them? You gonna hide your console or something?
 
Interfectum said:
Ugh, that sounds awful. How are you going to play games and not introduce your kids to them? You gonna hide your console or something?
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Of course not. I should have worded that differently. It's not that we wont let them play. If they decide on their own that games are an activity they want to do then we will give them time to play. What we don't want is for it to be as important an activity to them as it is to me.
 
So many sad stories in here... the feels.

My girlfriend and I just purchased our first home and are turning the finished basement into a full home theater (with the XBOX 1 and Wii U). Upstairs, the 3rd bedroom is becoming a dedicated his/her, side-by-side-monitor, gaming room (our PS4s) for multiplayer games.

Yeah, we're both gaming geeks... and it's amazing. Friday night... grab a few craft beers at the bar... come home play some games... more beer... happy couple.

Gaming and geeky shit in general is such a big part of both of our lives.
 
Aside from F2P apps on the Ipad, not really.

The last actual game she enjoyed was Until Dawn, and then our son was the one doing the controls, she just chose the course of the game.

Before that it was Mario Kart on the WiiU.

I guess over all she doesn't mind WATCHING a game and enjoying the story then actually playing. Loves those F2P app games though.

I've been kicking around the idea of getting Diablo 3 for PS4 to see if she might enjoy that since the game is easy even on Hard.
 
My wife has zero interest in games, the closest she's come is being impressed by a horse in RDR. Perhaps foolishly I dragged her down to London to a Zelda concert, which merely served to confirm her worst stereotypes of gamers, I enjoyed it though :-)
 
If she could she would throw my 20th Anniversary PS4 out of the window followed by all the games and my Vita.
And to think she used to like Sonic on Sega MegaDrive...
 
I'm so lucky that my wife is into gaming.

She never grew up with games as a kid or adolescent, so I kind of introdiced them to her somewhat. Turns out she is a hidden gamer.

We play WoW, FFXIV together mainly.

But she plays a lot of 3ds and Vita games on her own.

Turns out she loves anime as well, which she never watched before me either. I don't deserve her lol
 
This thread has shown me that a lot of folks get the stink eye from their SO when they come home and find you playing something.

Like being caught masturbating lol.
 
My woman wasn't much into games other than desktop match 3 kind of stuff, then one my friends got her into Resi Evil 5. No idea how he managed this, while she didn't like the gore she really liked the tight co-op where you have to communicate and use teamwork to progress. We played that on pro or whatever the highest setting, next was L4D, then Gears of War 3 Horde mode.

This gen has been rubbish, theres been so little split screen co-op now, I cant find anything to play together. I really miss playing games with her.

Annoyingly she automatically seems to hate Nintendo games and can't play platforming games as she never learned to platform jump well enough. We had runs at Minecraft and Don't Starve but had to give them up as they were too addictive.
 
She loves Plants vs Zombies 1 and after it was fixed 2. Vase breaker most nights it is quite impressive how much staying power that game has for her.
 
hbkdx12 said:
...

Video games are my main hobby. It's really the only thing i'll consistently spend money on that isn't a necessity. It's the main way that i chill out and relax. My gf doesn't hate video games but i know she doesn't respect the fact that i like them as much as i do. My gf is a very social person. She doesn't do a whole lot in isolation. She doesn't like to be alone. She needs to be interacting with people; it's just who she is. She comes from a huge family and thus she was never alone. She has a ton of friends and is the social butterfly at bars and events. Thus, she one of the people who stigmatize gaming as a nice one off every now and again but anything more than that is a lazy time sink. Conversely, I'm an only child and i've been gaming solo for majority of my life. So not only do i value alone time, i value playing video games in that alone time.

In turn it does make me feel guilty and feel like i have to hide it. On the rare occasion that i come home and my gf isn't already there, i'll try to get some non-judgemental game time in and as soon as i hear her opening the door i'll instantly put my ps4 into sleep mode and otherwise go about making it look like i was doing something more "productive"

...

I don't expect her to game with me. I don't even expect her to like it or understand it but a simple amount of respect is really all i ask. I'm not suggesting it needs to be my way or the highway in terms of my game playing. I'm more than willing to curb a bit of game time to devote to spending time with my gf but as a couple, especially one that lives together, having alone time is healthy so why should it matter that A) i want and enjoy that alone time and B) i'm playing video games during that alone time?
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The bolded portrays perfectly me and my previous relationship, of which I wrote about earlier on the thread. I was also made to feel guilty of doing something I enjoy, which is something that's not supposed to happen in a healthy relationship, speaking from a personal point of view. I've noticed it on a first hand basis, and in my close circles, that some people are incapable of accepting their spouses for what they are, and try to change them to fit their ideals. Whether it's about playing games, playing in a band, or something else, and getting the ultimatum to choose between the hobby or the highway. I've never understood the concept; you start dating a person knowing how (s)he is, but along the way you want him/her to be something else. It just baffles me.
 
snowblind said:
So many sad stories in here... the feels.

My girlfriend and I just purchased our first home and are turning the finished basement into a full home theater (with the XBOX 1 and Wii U). Upstairs, the 3rd bedroom is becoming a dedicated his/her, side-by-side-monitor, gaming room (our PS4s) for multiplayer games.

Yeah, we're both gaming geeks... and it's amazing. Friday night... grab a few craft beers at the bar... come home play some games... more beer... happy couple.

Gaming and geeky shit in general is such a big part of both of our lives.
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Living the dream.
 
Melchiah said:
Oh well, she might come back though, if something comes up that picks her interest, like Silent Hills you mentioned earlier.
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Just as you mentioned I may have found some success with Until Dawn. She's just watched a let's play and insisted on having a go tonight. Thank you video games.
 
snowblind said:
So many sad stories in here... the feels.

My girlfriend and I just purchased our first home and are turning the finished basement into a full home theater (with the XBOX 1 and Wii U). Upstairs, the 3rd bedroom is becoming a dedicated his/her, side-by-side-monitor, gaming room (our PS4s) for multiplayer games.

Yeah, we're both gaming geeks... and it's amazing. Friday night... grab a few craft beers at the bar... come home play some games... more beer... happy couple.

Gaming and geeky shit in general is such a big part of both of our lives.
Click to expand...

That sounds so, so awesome.

I'm quite lucky in the fact that my wife, while not a stereotypical geek, still loves a lot of TV shows and movies that I do.

We'll often sit down for marathon sessions of Firefly, Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Battlestar Galactica etc.. It's really just gaming she's lost some interest in.

Saying that if she was as much a gamer as I am we'd probably just spend all night arguing over who's turn it is to play next.
 
demosthenes said:
Living the dream.
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That we are... that we are! I'm a lucky guy.

Just finished the wall, floor and ceiling paint (still need to do trim - ugh, that's the worst) and installed our custom wall-mounted low (25.5" high) game monitor desk... perfect eye level when sitting back in comfy Ikea chairs. (fav cheap chair in the world) (2) BenQ gaming monitors with two PS4s (ignore the XB1 from downstairs... was testing with the BOIII beta).
ruoJGr5.jpg


And yes, we're into the minimal, clean look... but don't worry, there will be some custom Mario bro sprite art in frames along with some other gaming stuff lol. Second chair to come as well as blackout curtains for the windows.


WITHE1982 said:
That sounds so, so awesome.

I'm quite lucky in the fact that my wife, while not a stereotypical geek, still loves a lot of TV shows and movies that I do.

We'll often sit down for marathon sessions of Firefly, Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Battlestar Galactica etc.. It's really just gaming she's lost some interest in.

Saying that if she was as much a gamer as I am we'd probably just spend all night arguing over who's turn it is to play next.
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Yes! Same with my girl... we our nightly 8:30-11:30 TV shows... our weekend shows and movies. Taking turns is the reason for our game room. We both wanted to play together online and not have to switch back and forth. Really looking forward to it! (Still waiting for a good PS4 bundle sale)
 
She used to play casually.

She has always had a DS and played games like Layton and puzzle games, and she used to play things like Champions of Norrath or Smash Bros. She was pretty good at Dead or Alive at one point as well.

But one day she got an iPhone and has basically stopped gaming ever since. All the time she would have spend playing handheld games is now spent perusing Pinterest, Youtube, or Facebook on her phone. I've suggested we trade-in her 3DS since she no longer plays it but she refuses and says she will go back to it at some point but I highly doubt it will ever get played again.

It's as if smartphones have taken the casual gamer out of the picture when it comes to traditional games.

BUT, at least she doesn't care that I play games at all. She has her own hobby (Quilting) that is both time-consuming and expensive, and we have no human children. She has her sewing room, and I have my game room. We enjoy spending time together but she's not the type that needs me in the room with her.
 
Wow I guess I'm lucky. My fiancé played Bloodborne with me and bought us a second PS4 so we could coop together. Now we are playing Dead Nation for the 3rd time (she can't get enough of it), and we're both super psyched for Fallout 4. It's part of why we are getting married. Nice to get some perspective on how rare this is.
 
My partner doesn't play games, but he's otherwise fine with my hobby. He actually gets annoyed at the idea of me hiding or not playing games around him. It's definitely important to balance gaming with real life.
 
Me and my wife met and started dating in 2003... she was already into game when we met... but i was SUPER into FFXI, and i got her into it... we played FFXI for a good 8 years straight..

My 75 relic sky/sea nin (i only loved ninja... i did have all subs leved up)
her 75 relic sky/sea rdm & 75 thf (level 100+ bonecrafter)

We even got married in game! lol (we got real married in 2008)

uZLPGSb.png
 
My girlfriend doesn't play many games that aren't Zelda, but recently she watched all of Metal Gear Scanlon with me. Now she's watching me play though Phantom Pain. She's even been helping me out with spotting enemies and planning my approaches.

I've dated girls who looked down on gaming as a hobby. I could never do it again.
 
My wife does play occasionally with me and usually she loves story based games or certain platformers in co-op. Her favorites are Heavy Rain, Beyond and now recently Until Dawn. We also just finished playing Yoshi's Woolly World together and last year she really loved South Park: the Stick of Truth.
 
Matrix XII said:
That's awesome, looks like you guys have tons of fun :)

I was thinking about getting a 2nd ps4 for my wife actually.
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Do it. Depending on the games you both play it could really be a great investment. The SWMBO and I play mostly FPS and action/adventure games so both being able to go online and play along side our clan while remaining side by side... awesome.
 
Honome said:
My wife hates games, she thinks it's a waste of time and i have to fight hard to manage some gaming time. My curse to her is that probably all our 3 kids will love games... a lot!!!
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Never understood why some think games are more of a time waste than any other entertainment. Somehow watching TV the whole day is not a waste of time but playing games are.

My gf both play games and likes Nintendo, so that's a very nice thing to share, among many other things.
 
Yeah doesn't play them at all. She doesn't mind it's my main hobby as long as it doesn't interfere with our relationship. She'll occasionally play some games with me if its intuitive, hopefully she'll play some of my Mario Maker levels.
 
snowblind said:
Do it. Depending on the games you both play it could really be a great investment. The SWMBO and I play mostly FPS and action/adventure games so both being able to go online and play along side our clan while remaining side by side... awesome.
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Sounds like a lot of fun.

Can't afford it right now as we are moving into a new home soon.

But perhaps later in the year :)
 
As with many people in this thread, my wife doesn't really like videogames.
I think its a generation thing also. Younger women don't have a problem with that nowadays since they are born in a game world.

One thing is good at least. She lets me do my gaming and doesn't complain too much about it. We each have our activities the other don't like. I don't like dancing, she goes to nighclubs with her best female friend. This gives me a nice gaming time at home :)
 
ankor77 said:
My wife and I are 34. She doesnt like video games at all. But, she doesnt mind that I love them. She just wishes I didnt spend so much money on them!
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Exactly my scenario, although we are a few years older. If she had the patience, I think she would enjoy Telltale style games and games like Gone Home.
 
Zero interest. Mildly appreciates Zelda. Games with good graphics catch her eye but that's really it.

When we first moved in, I could barely play for 15 mins without constant sighing. I've eased her into it and I can play for hours now but she still does come up and talk to me during cutscenes or dialog which I find to be extremely annoying but I can't really get too upset about her just trying to talk to me. Because of this though, I can't really play a super involved game like MGS or something story heavy because I'm always being approached to look at something on her phone or to just talk about something. Really gets me out of the zone.

If anything, she has become too accepting of it, I need to cool down on the gaming and start taking her out more. As probably with anything, the more I game, the less I appreciate it. I think it'd only benefit me to spend a lot more time outside and come back and have a really good time playing.
 
My wife is currently playing Viva Pinata as I type, has 100% completed Persona 4, (I wouldn't dare this, I don't have the time), has done everything one can imagine in Fallout 3 and Skyrim, mains an infuriating Chun Li in Third Strike, will fight you if you say Ocarina of Time is better than Majora's Mask, has completed Resident Evil 4 8 times, is an amazing mother and cook, gets in that gym with me consistently, and is absolutely more than I deserve. A love of gaming and fitness brought us together, and it honestly plays a part in keeping us together. My ex wife was not a big gamer at all and didn't give a shit about her health and well......she's my ex. Some people say it doesn't matter if their significant other shares their interests or not, but in my experience it absolutely does; much more so than I ever really realized.
 
I met my fiance through Guild Wars 2 so I think it's safe to say she likes games. We love playing through co-op games together like Trine and the isometric Lara Croft games. Funnily enough playing through an MMO with her can be annoying. She's always racing ahead and leaving me in the dust.

The only real problem is sometimes it can be hard to fit in time for a single player game if I'm interested in one that she isn't.
 
My BF and I are both avid gamers - albeit different genres. Which makes it sort of frustrating, when you want to share a hobby, but can rarely find a game we're both interested in.
 
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