My ex was what I would consider a casual gamer. But she would love to watch me play games like uncharted or last of us. She'd play GTA and do the weirdest shit tho. Like she would just follow people and say she wants to find out how they're day went. I don't think I'd ever keep it a secret though. Most girls I meet aren't that Into gaming besides mobile, but it's never a issue.
-
Hey Guest. Check out your NeoGAF Wrapped 2025 results here!
Is your significant other not into games at all?
- Thread starter mattiewheels
- Start date
My ex was what I would consider a casual gamer. But she would love to watch me play games like uncharted or last of us. She'd play GTA and do the weirdest shit tho. Like she would just follow people and say she wants to find out how they're day went. I don't think I'd ever keep it a secret though. Most girls I meet aren't that Into gaming besides mobile, but it's never a issue.
Ha! The crazy thing is she is so fucking good at those games, too! Especially SMB3. Way, way better than I ever was.
anarckitty
Member
My husband is even more into gaming than I am. If we didn't have a 3 year old child and another one on the way I would probably be more into gaming. Really just lack of time keeps me away from gaming. Once you have a fulltime job and kids to take care of you've really got to manage your time for video games. I've been playing games since I was 3 years old. I sometimes wish he'd play a little less, but thankfully it's usually just in spurts. Right now he's sunk over 100 hours into The Witcher 3, and last night I just finished up Until Dawn.
We're both equally excited about Fallout 4.
We're both equally excited about Fallout 4.
My fiancee likes old school games like Super Marios, Mega Mans (although she's not very good at those) and stuff like that. Not really that interested in the newer games (sometimes likes to watch me playing), though the most recent game she actually really wanted was Yoshi's Woolly World and it was awesome to play the whole game through with her in co-op. She's more into those Facebook and other mobile games.
My fiancée and I play games everyday. Her favorite right now is definitely Splatoon, but we also play Halo MCC and Smash Brothers together on a regular basis. Just got her into PC gaming for the first time, we're starting with BF4 but looking to try an MMO or two here in the near future.
It's a blast. :3
It's a blast. :3
Melchiah
Member
I've experienced similar things in my past relationship. She felt like it took away from our time together, eventhough I didn't play that often. Her handcraft hobbies were the kind where she could keep up a conversation while doing them, and all of my hobbies were exactly the opposite, like gaming, reading and writing. As a result she made me feel guilty of keeping hobbies I enjoy, and I often felt like I was supposed to change to something she wanted me to be, eventhough she wasn't going to change from her ways. My current relationship is entirely different in that regard, partly because we don't live together. Both of us have the freedom to pursue our interests during the week, without any guilt attached, and during the weekends we spend more time together.
On a side note, it makes me wonder how would a man be seen, if he demanded the same from a woman; quitting whatever she's doing whenever he wants to, making her feel guilty of doing things she loves, and mandating what she can and cannot do.
I think that's a pretty common experience. I had to sit my partner down and explain to her that I need alone time. I'm not an extrovert, I get tired and stressed if I don't shut out the world completely for an hour or so a day. She even hates that I go to the gym, and would rather me go for a run with her (despite me telling her 100 times I fucking hate running).
It got a lot better after that, but she still didn't like me playing games, she just understood that I'm going to be in a bad mood if I don't get my alone time.
GeordieMark
Member
My girlfriend will play one game; Mario 64.
I've occasionally showed her bits of games I thought she might be interested in, but she really doesn't care.
I've occasionally showed her bits of games I thought she might be interested in, but she really doesn't care.
Melchiah
Member
Yeah, that's one reason for why my current relationship works better, as both of us are the kind of persons who need to have time alone. I don't think our relationship would have lasted over six years, if we lived together. Being also an introvert, having time to be by myself is essential.
My wife isn't into games at all. However we have four TVs and I don't watch much TV (apart from when viewing a film) so we do other stuff together and when she's watching something like Great British Bake Off (or whatever it's called) I'm in the other room with headphones on playing some games (or on PC I guess).
Not an issue and doesn't cause me to "hide" gaming. We both watch films, she watches TV I'm not interested in sometimes and I play games she's not interested in sometimes.
No biggie.
Not an issue and doesn't cause me to "hide" gaming. We both watch films, she watches TV I'm not interested in sometimes and I play games she's not interested in sometimes.
No biggie.
Vincent Grayson
Member
My wife's not a big gamer, though she's played stuff with me in the past (we loved doing all of Heavy Rain passing the controller, and 2 player mode in Beyond).
Gaming is my main hobby though, so it does take a big chunk of my free time. She's cool with it though, since her free time is mostly spent watching YT people she likes, and occasional bad television via Netflix.
Gaming is my main hobby though, so it does take a big chunk of my free time. She's cool with it though, since her free time is mostly spent watching YT people she likes, and occasional bad television via Netflix.
mcz117chief
Member
Apart from Mario Kart 8, which she loves, I can´t get her to enjoy any other game. I hope when Mario Tennis releases we can play together. I also plan on making some training levels on Super Mario Maker for her, maybe if she finally learns how to have control in a 2D platformer we can try cooping New Super Mario Bros or even 3D World.
Chû Totoro
Member
My wife can play a few games and used to play Nes and MegaDrive when she was a kid but it's not something she would do naturally now. If there is other people playing Mario Kart or Nintendo Land she will join happily but if I play another less fun or accessible game she'll just ask what is it by curiosity or make a few comments and that's about it.
Still, she's nice enough to listen to me and even discuss some games when I talk about the ones I find to be amazing. She loves Shadow of The Colossus, Flower or Super Mario Galaxy because she saw me playing and she discussed with me about what these games can accomplish ad kind of agree (also seeing my big smiling face in front of games or my eyes full of stars when talking about some others makes her happy so...).
She has her own games but it's Singstar, Zumba, Just Dance and similar games so not really gaming as we would describe it here. She don't play on mobile (she finds the games to be boring or repetitive just after a few plays but she has only tried the casual F2P crap like Candy Crush and since she like Zoo Keeper, Super Puzzle Fighter, Puzzle Bobble she knows how good little games can be).
She's waiting for Singstar PS4 not to be crap (she has more than 350) and the release of Just Dance 2016 on Wii U.
But since I don't play a lot and if we can do something together I'd rather play another time she has almost no reasons to hate gaming. Not being into it is something but not liking it is something else. My sisters hates CoD because her husband plays like 10 to 20 hours per week, he talks about it with his cousins and friends and has no games that other people could enjoy... so yeah good way to make people think gaming is about being in a bubble with an expensive helmet playing online with people you're insulting.
Still, she's nice enough to listen to me and even discuss some games when I talk about the ones I find to be amazing. She loves Shadow of The Colossus, Flower or Super Mario Galaxy because she saw me playing and she discussed with me about what these games can accomplish ad kind of agree (also seeing my big smiling face in front of games or my eyes full of stars when talking about some others makes her happy so...).
She has her own games but it's Singstar, Zumba, Just Dance and similar games so not really gaming as we would describe it here. She don't play on mobile (she finds the games to be boring or repetitive just after a few plays but she has only tried the casual F2P crap like Candy Crush and since she like Zoo Keeper, Super Puzzle Fighter, Puzzle Bobble she knows how good little games can be).
She's waiting for Singstar PS4 not to be crap (she has more than 350) and the release of Just Dance 2016 on Wii U.
But since I don't play a lot and if we can do something together I'd rather play another time she has almost no reasons to hate gaming. Not being into it is something but not liking it is something else. My sisters hates CoD because her husband plays like 10 to 20 hours per week, he talks about it with his cousins and friends and has no games that other people could enjoy... so yeah good way to make people think gaming is about being in a bubble with an expensive helmet playing online with people you're insulting.
PositiveGamer
Member
Having a wife or GF not respect your hobbies.. Not just Games but any hobbies at all is indeed critical for a relationship to work. My wife doesn't care about games but she doesn't interfere with them either..
However, there many times where arguments start because of "video games" These arguments just get old. Little by little it starts to destroy your relationship because you have been a gamer since a child and that's something no girl can ever take away.
Yes, your gaming time will deplete over time.. but your significant other shouldn't interfere with it when you decide to sit down and grab a controller.
However, there many times where arguments start because of "video games" These arguments just get old. Little by little it starts to destroy your relationship because you have been a gamer since a child and that's something no girl can ever take away.
Yes, your gaming time will deplete over time.. but your significant other shouldn't interfere with it when you decide to sit down and grab a controller.
I've never dated a girl who plays anything beyond iOS Candy Crush style stuff or maybe dance/instrument games.
VG in Latin America is still seen as a boy's hobby (note: not men's either).
I don't mind though. I think I'd end up playing waaay too much if on top of my gaming time I added GF time which also involved video games
VG in Latin America is still seen as a boy's hobby (note: not men's either).
I don't mind though. I think I'd end up playing waaay too much if on top of my gaming time I added GF time which also involved video games
Melchiah
Member
Never experienced anything like this as I haven't dated a gamer, but this kind of differentiation sounds pretty illogical.
EDIT: Come to think of it, it's pretty much the same when people say that they don't watch TV, which is something I see from time to time on FB, yet they watch the same series via Netflix/HBO services.
Actually that's one of the few games my partner fell in love with. They're all over the place. MK8, Splatoon and Binding of Isaac.
Good games to become obsessed with, no coherence when it comes to mechanics.
When I met my now wife she had hardly played a video game but that soon changed when I bought a PS1. For years we spent hours if not days playing through FF7, Resident Evil 2, Silent Hill etc...
Eventually we moved onto the PS2 and her love for games exploded. We'd have day/week long sessions on Vice City, Shadow of the Colossus, Kingdom Hearts or SH2. It seemed we'd grow old playing games together.
Unfortunately around the time I bought my first PS3 her love for games had dwindled. She says that they've become to "complicated, time consuming and just not fun any more". I do agree with her somewhat.
I now own a PS4 and play almost every night but, other than a few hours on Sleeping Dogs or GTA5, she no longer bothers. I was pumped when Silent Hills was recently announced and she really started to show an interest in gaming again as a result but once the project was cancelled that brief glimmer of hope was extinguished... Damn you Konami!!!
Eventually we moved onto the PS2 and her love for games exploded. We'd have day/week long sessions on Vice City, Shadow of the Colossus, Kingdom Hearts or SH2. It seemed we'd grow old playing games together.
Unfortunately around the time I bought my first PS3 her love for games had dwindled. She says that they've become to "complicated, time consuming and just not fun any more". I do agree with her somewhat.
I now own a PS4 and play almost every night but, other than a few hours on Sleeping Dogs or GTA5, she no longer bothers. I was pumped when Silent Hills was recently announced and she really started to show an interest in gaming again as a result but once the project was cancelled that brief glimmer of hope was extinguished... Damn you Konami!!!
NowhereFaded
Member
My wife of 4 years has zero interest. She thinks it's funny. I know my limits and defiantly don't over do it with my gaming time. Family first 
Olliewilldie
Neo Member
My partner of 8 years doesn't play games at all and claims "THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME" but it's never been a problem and never will be.
She likes yoga for example and I can't bloody stand that.
I've had a partner who played and liked games as much as me in the past. That turned out to be terrible as all we would EVER do is play games which just wasn't healthy in my opinion.
I get to do loads of things I would never do because of the interests she has so it's great.
Being with someone with different interests is a good thing! You get to do shit you would never think of.
She likes yoga for example and I can't bloody stand that.
I've had a partner who played and liked games as much as me in the past. That turned out to be terrible as all we would EVER do is play games which just wasn't healthy in my opinion.
I get to do loads of things I would never do because of the interests she has so it's great.
Being with someone with different interests is a good thing! You get to do shit you would never think of.
Melchiah
Member
Perhaps smaller indie games, like The Vanishing of Ethan Carter, Everybody's Gone to the Rapture and the upcoming What Remains of Edith Finch, might rekindle her interest in gaming?
She thinks it's "cute" that I'm into games. Like, it's so adorable that I'm like a big kid with my toys. And that's worrying, because that novelty can't last for ever and I feel like I'm going to be told to grow up or something.
She loves The Sims, Candy Crush and Drop7, and that's it. I tried her with Hearthstone to see if she could transition into something a little nerdier, but she gave up before the tutorial was done. I sometimes ask her if she'd like to play something with me, to spend a little time together, and the response is always as if she's allergic to it. Nothing can convince her to even try taking the controller before dismissing it, and if I ask why I get a "just because". Which hurts a little, if I'm being honest. She'd rather endlessly scroll through Facebook on her phone than try to enjoy something that's a big part of my life.
But I don't push it. She has her interests and I have mine. She probably could get me to sit down and watch Keeping Up With the Kardashians if it would mean a lot to her, but if it comes on, I'm off to the study to play a game.
She loves The Sims, Candy Crush and Drop7, and that's it. I tried her with Hearthstone to see if she could transition into something a little nerdier, but she gave up before the tutorial was done. I sometimes ask her if she'd like to play something with me, to spend a little time together, and the response is always as if she's allergic to it. Nothing can convince her to even try taking the controller before dismissing it, and if I ask why I get a "just because". Which hurts a little, if I'm being honest. She'd rather endlessly scroll through Facebook on her phone than try to enjoy something that's a big part of my life.
But I don't push it. She has her interests and I have mine. She probably could get me to sit down and watch Keeping Up With the Kardashians if it would mean a lot to her, but if it comes on, I'm off to the study to play a game.
I wish. I have both Ethan Carter and Rapture and have 100% each of them. Try as I might to convince her of their merits she just blew them off. I'm starting to think that ship has sailed unfortunately.
My gf of a couple years had no real interest in games whatsoever. But after we got together she took an interest in what I played to get closer to me I think, bless her.
Now she's totally into story driven stuff like TLoU, Uncharted watching me play, and Journey or Telltale games (she can play those as they're so easy). She also likes the fun party games like Towerfall Ascension and Mario Kart, but if the control scheme is too complicated she'll give up quick.
Now she's pushing me to get Until Dawn!
In the end though she's still racked up over 100 hours playing stuff like Connect the Dots on her iPhone lol
Now she's totally into story driven stuff like TLoU, Uncharted watching me play, and Journey or Telltale games (she can play those as they're so easy). She also likes the fun party games like Towerfall Ascension and Mario Kart, but if the control scheme is too complicated she'll give up quick.
Now she's pushing me to get Until Dawn!
In the end though she's still racked up over 100 hours playing stuff like Connect the Dots on her iPhone lol
My husband is a game developer, so gaming is something that we're both very passionate about as one of our bigger hobbies since we've been together these last 10 years. I'm incredibly lucky all things considered.
We do have somewhat differing tastes. He's currently playing through Witcher 3, Rocket League and FF11, while I'm playing through various otoge, TitS (finally getting around to it) Danganronpa:AE and P4D when it comes out. Together we like to play various MMOs like FF14 and more recently we've been going through Until Dawn together which has been a blast.
He also lets me import a pretty large amount of games from Japan, and while he likes to tease me about my VN/otoge collection, he supports and respects whatever I play. He's pretty amazing.
We do have somewhat differing tastes. He's currently playing through Witcher 3, Rocket League and FF11, while I'm playing through various otoge, TitS (finally getting around to it) Danganronpa:AE and P4D when it comes out. Together we like to play various MMOs like FF14 and more recently we've been going through Until Dawn together which has been a blast.
He also lets me import a pretty large amount of games from Japan, and while he likes to tease me about my VN/otoge collection, he supports and respects whatever I play. He's pretty amazing.
Melchiah
Member
Oh well, she might come back though, if something comes up that picks her interest, like Silent Hills you mentioned earlier.
thomasmahler
Moon Studios
Not at all, but she forced herself to play Ori for 30 minutes to show support
Death Penalty
Member
I just couldn't date someone who didn't share my gaming hobby to an extent. My fianceé considers playing a game together to be great quality time, and we share everything from Pikmin to Bayonetta as a couple. After experiencing that, I couldn't go back to doing things any other way.
I'm 28 and my fianceé is 24. She will occasionally play a game or two of Mario Kart 8 or Super Mario 3D World, or as she likes to call it "The Mario cat game". It is frustrating at times trying to explain why I'm excited about X game. Most recently MGS5 and the hype around it. She just doesn't "get it". But I still love her.
Deadpool_X
Banned
My wife doesn't mind if I game, and she may even jump in on some Peggle 2 or Mario Bros 3 from time to time, but other than that, she isn't into gaming. Her ex-husband was a deadbeat who played games constantly, ignoring her and the kids. She would take the kids away for a weekend to an amusement park or something, and he would refuse to come along, instead, opting to stay home and game the whole time. She knows that my gaming habits aren't like his, but still, occasionally has 'Nam style flashbacks if I get home from work before her and am playing a game. It takes her a few minutes to remember that I'm not him, and then she is fine.
I don't hide my gaming from her, and she doesn't tell me I can't play games, but she definitely isn't into anything that came out after 1995.
I don't hide my gaming from her, and she doesn't tell me I can't play games, but she definitely isn't into anything that came out after 1995.
The wife is not into it to the degree that I am (as in: following the industry), but she definitely is into video games in general.
She is almost as good as I am playing FPSs and better in a lot of genres, and she can solve puzzles like no one's business (she's a huge classic Tomb Raider fan, disliked the reboot because the dialing back of tombs and puzzle difficulty).
In terms of game mechanics, she almost is the dudebro in our relationship - she likes to get on with the action, instead of fussing over min/maxing or general theorycrafting and stat crunching stuff.
She is almost as good as I am playing FPSs and better in a lot of genres, and she can solve puzzles like no one's business (she's a huge classic Tomb Raider fan, disliked the reboot because the dialing back of tombs and puzzle difficulty).
In terms of game mechanics, she almost is the dudebro in our relationship - she likes to get on with the action, instead of fussing over min/maxing or general theorycrafting and stat crunching stuff.
Similar to my situation.
My girlfriend and I bought a Wii U in July and we play Mario Kart, Splatoon and Smash together. She doesn't really like the any of my PS4 games but she didn't randomly get hooked on Woah Dave while playing it on my Vita on the way home from Florida.
Mihos
Gold Member
My wife doesn't, but she loves that I do. She talks about my vintage collection all the time and even brings her friends over to see it, although she hasn't played a proper game in the last 10 years. She will sit and watch me play while she reads on her tablet, or sometimes I will remote play on the deck while we sit on the deck in the morning or evening.
We have always kept our hobbies in the proper place, priority wise. That is the secret. Now that we are older, we have more time and resources to spend on hobbies, and video games is a great one to have.
We have always kept our hobbies in the proper place, priority wise. That is the secret. Now that we are older, we have more time and resources to spend on hobbies, and video games is a great one to have.
My SO doesn't play games, but I wouldn't say she is not interested. She'll listen to me blab on about games and dumb stuff I read here on NeoGAF. I play most of my games in our Media Room where she'll hang out with me and watch. For some intense games, she goes as far as being a "backseat" gamer calling out my deaths and mishaps right before they happen
I wouldn't have gotten an Xbox 360 back in 2006 if she hadn't basically lifted it of the shelf and put it in my hands. It was her idea to get our six-year old a 2DS which he just recently beat New Super Mario Bros. 2 on.
There are a lot of threads on her about how to get your SO interested or started in playing games. I think the logic is that if they partake in your hobby, you'll have more time to do your hobby. But I don't think it works that way. My SO loves to read books and is in two book clubs but I'm not going to join a book club anytime soon. I'm still interested in what she is reading.
You also should never have to game "in secret." It's a hobby...a form of leisure time! It should be easy to express interest in your SO's hobbies and vice-versa.
Edit for Clarification: After reading my post a second time I feel like I made everything sound super perfect. Let's be real, you'll never get a blank check to play games 24/7 and ignore your family or responsibilities - whether your SO is into games or not. Hence, why we all have huge backlogs!
I wouldn't have gotten an Xbox 360 back in 2006 if she hadn't basically lifted it of the shelf and put it in my hands. It was her idea to get our six-year old a 2DS which he just recently beat New Super Mario Bros. 2 on.
There are a lot of threads on her about how to get your SO interested or started in playing games. I think the logic is that if they partake in your hobby, you'll have more time to do your hobby. But I don't think it works that way. My SO loves to read books and is in two book clubs but I'm not going to join a book club anytime soon. I'm still interested in what she is reading.
You also should never have to game "in secret." It's a hobby...a form of leisure time! It should be easy to express interest in your SO's hobbies and vice-versa.
Edit for Clarification: After reading my post a second time I feel like I made everything sound super perfect. Let's be real, you'll never get a blank check to play games 24/7 and ignore your family or responsibilities - whether your SO is into games or not. Hence, why we all have huge backlogs!
my long term gf (9+ years) was not into games when we met. now is a little different, but not much. she likes to play some console games from time to time but it has not turned into a hobby or anything close. she really respects the industry though. we always watch E3 together when we can. we also visited Gamescom 2 times now and we'll be going to EGX this month. i'm really greatful for that.
right now we are rocking some ESO on PS4 if our free time allows it.
right now we are rocking some ESO on PS4 if our free time allows it.
xamidoxhua
Member
My partner of 7 years doesn't like games at all, doesn't really like me playing them - but bless her heart she doesn't stop me from doing it.
My wife was kinda(?) into games when she was a kid, we have an N64 w/ Goldeneye/MK64/Mario because of her (I sold mine like an idiot).
But now she doesn't really play videogames at all..except on her phone. I'll get excited about a game and she'll say 'cool yeah I'll play that with you!', and never does lol. The key though is she doesn't mind me playing games on our main tv whenever I want so it's fine really.
But now she doesn't really play videogames at all..except on her phone. I'll get excited about a game and she'll say 'cool yeah I'll play that with you!', and never does lol. The key though is she doesn't mind me playing games on our main tv whenever I want so it's fine really.
Luckily I am in the same boat. However she sometimes does not really understand my excitement when a new game comes out like MGSV:TPP or Fallout 4 or whatsoever
But its cool anyway, we have our agreement and she does not bother me that often while playing. I have to use some strange times though. Like Sunday morning before she gets up. 3 hours of me just playing! Yes!
I could write a whole essay on this...
I relocated and moved in with my gf last year. Before we starting co-habitating my normal day consisted of coming home from work, eating dinner/winding down for about an hr or 2 and then play some games usually till i need to go to bed. So easily got atleast 4 hrs of gaming a day, with much more on the weekends. Now i'm lucky if i manage to get 4 hrs in a week. A year ago I would generally beat a new game release that i got on tuesday by the weekend. I bought Arkham Knight day one and it took me a month and a half to get through it. Not because it was hard, not because i didn't like it but because i don't feel comfortable gaming when my gf is around.
Video games are my main hobby. It's really the only thing i'll consistently spend money on that isn't a necessity. It's the main way that i chill out and relax. My gf doesn't hate video games but i know she doesn't respect the fact that i like them as much as i do. My gf is a very social person. She doesn't do a whole lot in isolation. She doesn't like to be alone. She needs to be interacting with people; it's just who she is. She comes from a huge family and thus she was never alone. She has a ton of friends and is the social butterfly at bars and events. Thus, she one of the people who stigmatize gaming as a nice one off every now and again but anything more than that is a lazy time sink. Conversely, I'm an only child and i've been gaming solo for majority of my life. So not only do i value alone time, i value playing video games in that alone time.
In turn it does make me feel guilty and feel like i have to hide it. On the rare occasion that i come home and my gf isn't already there, i'll try to get some non-judgemental game time in and as soon as i hear her opening the door i'll instantly put my ps4 into sleep mode and otherwise go about making it look like i was doing something more "productive"
I will generally try to make time to wake up early or go to sleep late just to get some non-judgemental game time. I probably don't need to go into great detail about how much this sucks and how tired it makes me overall.
The times where she goes to dinner with a friend or is babysitting and i'm alone for some guaranteed hours, I'll force myself to play some games even if I don't want to or if i'm not in the mood simply because i have the free time and don't want to squander it because i know when I am in the mood and she's around, thats when the guilt and judgement come in.
This past weekend she went out of town for 4 days. 95% of my weekend consisted of me sitting my ass in front of the tv and playing games (particularly Until Dawn [the game]). I loved it. People who don't enjoy video games like i do look at that situation and feel like either i must have had nothing better to do or im some lazy bum with no life excluding the notion that i may just be doing something that i enjoy. Period. When she came back and asked me what i did this weekend do you think that's what i told her?
I don't expect her to game with me. I don't even expect her to like it or understand it but a simple amount of respect is really all i ask. I'm not suggesting it needs to be my way or the highway in terms of my game playing. I'm more than willing to curb a bit of game time to devote to spending time with my gf but as a couple, especially one that lives together, having alone time is healthy so why should it matter that A) i want and enjoy that alone time and B) i'm playing video games during that alone time?
I relocated and moved in with my gf last year. Before we starting co-habitating my normal day consisted of coming home from work, eating dinner/winding down for about an hr or 2 and then play some games usually till i need to go to bed. So easily got atleast 4 hrs of gaming a day, with much more on the weekends. Now i'm lucky if i manage to get 4 hrs in a week. A year ago I would generally beat a new game release that i got on tuesday by the weekend. I bought Arkham Knight day one and it took me a month and a half to get through it. Not because it was hard, not because i didn't like it but because i don't feel comfortable gaming when my gf is around.
Video games are my main hobby. It's really the only thing i'll consistently spend money on that isn't a necessity. It's the main way that i chill out and relax. My gf doesn't hate video games but i know she doesn't respect the fact that i like them as much as i do. My gf is a very social person. She doesn't do a whole lot in isolation. She doesn't like to be alone. She needs to be interacting with people; it's just who she is. She comes from a huge family and thus she was never alone. She has a ton of friends and is the social butterfly at bars and events. Thus, she one of the people who stigmatize gaming as a nice one off every now and again but anything more than that is a lazy time sink. Conversely, I'm an only child and i've been gaming solo for majority of my life. So not only do i value alone time, i value playing video games in that alone time.
In turn it does make me feel guilty and feel like i have to hide it. On the rare occasion that i come home and my gf isn't already there, i'll try to get some non-judgemental game time in and as soon as i hear her opening the door i'll instantly put my ps4 into sleep mode and otherwise go about making it look like i was doing something more "productive"
I will generally try to make time to wake up early or go to sleep late just to get some non-judgemental game time. I probably don't need to go into great detail about how much this sucks and how tired it makes me overall.
The times where she goes to dinner with a friend or is babysitting and i'm alone for some guaranteed hours, I'll force myself to play some games even if I don't want to or if i'm not in the mood simply because i have the free time and don't want to squander it because i know when I am in the mood and she's around, thats when the guilt and judgement come in.
This past weekend she went out of town for 4 days. 95% of my weekend consisted of me sitting my ass in front of the tv and playing games (particularly Until Dawn [the game]). I loved it. People who don't enjoy video games like i do look at that situation and feel like either i must have had nothing better to do or im some lazy bum with no life excluding the notion that i may just be doing something that i enjoy. Period. When she came back and asked me what i did this weekend do you think that's what i told her?
I don't expect her to game with me. I don't even expect her to like it or understand it but a simple amount of respect is really all i ask. I'm not suggesting it needs to be my way or the highway in terms of my game playing. I'm more than willing to curb a bit of game time to devote to spending time with my gf but as a couple, especially one that lives together, having alone time is healthy so why should it matter that A) i want and enjoy that alone time and B) i'm playing video games during that alone time?
Whenever I play a game I always need to be alone in the room, otherwise I just get really self-concious.
Maybe you could try that? I mean if she has any love for you I'm sure she wouldn't mind you playing an hour after work.