Lol that reminds me of this big black dude that transferred to our school in 5th grade. He was 13 and like 6 feet tall. He'd bully everybody and when he hit you with one of the giant deflated bouncy balls it stung like fuck.
We used to make plans on how we would deal with him at recess. Mainly involved jumping on him and trying to knock him into the corner that was lower than the rest of the playground and smelled like piss.
I still have those plans stashed away somewhere.
Learn what narcissistic and borderline personality disorders are, and what they and bipolar behavior look like. Learn which sex is more prone to narcissistic behavior and which is more prone to BPD. Steer clear of these people.
It's each person's choice whether they want the influence of BPD or NPD in their life. Yes, bipolar people suffer as well, but the onus is on them to seek help. As many go untreated, for those that don't suffer, it's wise to steer clear.This is cold, perhaps good advice in certain circumstances, but a bit misleading. If you aren't in the line of psychology, psychiatry, counseling, or therapy for work, if it's not your profession, you will misdiagnose.
The only reason I say anything is because at one point, I thought I had Borderline Personality Disorder. Going to therapy proved that not to be the case, and helped me work on the things that I thought were the signs of the disorder. I can't imagine how rough it would be if people just left me because they assumed I did.
It's also important to remember that people with these afflictions suffer, too. If they've willingly crossed a line with you drop them if that's what you think is needed. But you really shouldn't abandon loved ones, if you love them you're lying to them and to yourself doing that.
Mental health advice these days is tailored mostly to women (e.g. talking through feelings etc.) but is thrust upon men even though it’s not how we deal with these things. Ignore such advice that encourages you to wallow in feelings.
My advice is to find something that gives you purpose. Something that makes you want to wake up in the morning so you can keep doing it. For me, I’m an engineer and I love what I do. I don’t dread going to work because it’s not a chore — I design something, it gets excavated to my design, and I get to see the end result and say “I designed that”. I get paid well for it too which is a bonus. You say you’re going to uni but whether that is a good thing depends entirely on what you’re doing. Most subjects in the arts and humanities will put you deep in the debt hole and will give you a lifetime of financial stress likely while working a dead end job in an unrelated field. If you’re doing a novelty subject, you’re better off switching to something in STEM or health (if possible) or learning a trade. There is absolutely no shame in becoming an electrician or plumber. In fact, I’d be more proud of my kid if he learned a trade than if he got a participation degree. Uni is not the be all and end all, no matter what anyone says.
Family is the other big factor. As a man, you are hardwired to provide for others. This is where much of your motivation comes from. Find yourself a good woman and work towards building a future together. If you have a long term vision and can see how all the small things along the way fit in, it can provide a lot of motivation to keep going and push through the difficult times. I have known people who lived through severe trauma (one was repeatedly and violently gang raped at school over a period of three years) and the best way for them to deal with their trauma was by living for others. There is a great sense of satisfaction in being a provider.
Also the fact that you can recognise and appreciate how lucky you are to “live like a king” despite your own personal adversity will help you go a long way in life. Never stop being thankful for the good things in your life, no matter how many troubles come your way.
I have heard this a lot from people recently. Definitely looking forward to being productive with my life, even if it means I have way less time to play games.
Plus it helps define your limits as to what you can and cannot do, tolerate or desire. If you've worked hard, you can be proud of it. Nobody can take away your wisdom and earnings, or push you around. This applies to lifting, studying or networking.Working hard when you’re young allows you to take it a lot easier when you’re older.
You have to remember that while there are many things you can't control in life, you can control how you react. This has been the single most important thing for me to remember throughout life.
15. You pay for what you get. Always.
For those of you who are looking to buy home, mortgages are daunting.
Always ask a mortgage broker for advice. Never do a mortgage on your own.
To qualify for as high of a mortgage as possible, it's all about disposable cash flow. So try to have a little loans as possible. If it means you have to pay off a loan early, do it. For example you got this:
- Car loan ($500/mth)
- Student loan ($200/mth)
- Credit card balance ($100/mth)
To the bank, that's $800/mth you got locked up in existing debts. Look at how much balance there is in each and if you have to bite the bullet, pay one off in full if you can. This will free up monthly cash flow and your mortgage will get approved higher.
Costs
There's more than just the % rate you see.
There's other shit like terms, how many years, variable or fixed, and extremely important.... break up fees. The standard I believe is 3 months interest. Not the end of the world. But some low rate mortgages have high break up fees where they tale the differential in rates and grill you. If you move a mortgage to another one, that's "porting". The fees can be high too.
Mortgage payments are one part equity and one part interest. depending on the place a d plan, it might skew a little more or less to principal equity or interest. Try to get ones that skew payments to equity first as front loaded. This is important because i you even run into money and want to pay it off faster, you've already banked more equity to begin with so your balance is smaller if you pay them the principal and 3 months interest penalty.
At the end of the day you want:
- Low rate to begin with
- Low break up fees
- Zero fee to change mortgage if you stick with the existing bank. Don't get grilled for a $200 fee or anything stupid if you change a mortgage with the same place. They should waive the fee. Don't let the idiot junior person "follow the rules". Elevate it to the manager to waive the fee if you need to
Variable or Fixed?
I've always done variable and it's worked 90% of the time. Only a small amount of time has there been a time I should have locked in a fixed.
Never the less, it's one part costs, and one part predictability. Variable rates go up or down a quarter point when the banks change rates. A fixed rate stays the same for the period you agreed to, so the payments are the same. A variable rate mortgage has your payments going up or down.
Fixed is better if you get a great rate and want a predictable payment. But if rates are high and you have flexibility, a variable is likely better as the rates are usually a bit better.
Payment Frequency
Every mortgage let's you choose.... monthly, weekly, twice a month, every two weeks.
Assuming you aren't totally cash crunched, always choose the fastest payment so your overall mortgage is lowest with the least interest paid.
I believe weekly is the best, but most people don't do that as people usually get paid every two weeks. So a good ,one to pick is every two weeks. So you'll do 26 payments a year. If you do twice a month, that's 24 payments. Doesn't sound like a lot, but doing every two weeks (accelerated bi-weekly) will likely cut your mortgage down a few years and save you $10,000s of interest (depending how big your starting mortgage is).
Play with the tools
Every bank should have some mortgage calculator and payment schedule tool to dabble with online. Just mess around with it.
first paragraph is truth
i said this before in another thread but again:
school bully in 5th grade sucker punched me so i tackled him and punched out most of his teeth, kicked dirt and leaves all over him, dragged him by his left ankle 10 feet or so to a puddle of water (was gonna drown him but a teacher stopped me)
story became legend in my class until the end of high school and i was never bullied again
On the other end, renting is not a bad thing. Don't get yourself locked into a space, place or lifestyle in which becomes an albatross. Renting buys you flexibility in time and space.Generally speaking, the loans should be paid off in descending order of interest rate. This means the credit card should be paid off as a priority. It doesn’t matter if it’s only $100 on the credit card and $100,000 on the student loan — you pay the credit card off first because it has the higher interest rate.
I would also dissuade people from maxing out their home loans just because they can. Live within your means.
I prefer the no bruises approach of twisting their arm behind their back and making them apologise. Less trouble that way.
Renting can be good too.On the other end, renting is not a bad thing. Don't get yourself locked into a space, place or lifestyle in which becomes an albatross. Renting buys you flexibility in time and space.
And for the dating gentlemen, any woman who judges you because you rent and don't own, you really don't need them around.
I'll give three that have made the later years of my life considerably more enjoyable than the early.
1. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Yeah, I was raised to be a tough guy, pray for a stronger back, self-made and all that. If I can't make it on my own, I don't want to make it at all stuff. Fact is, moving a 150 pound dresser up the stairs is a lot easier with more sets of hands and most importantly, people want to help. It gives their own lives joy and meaning - so don't rob them of the opportunity.
2. Go ahead an take a look at the pets at the animal shelter. Lots of great dogs and cats there.
3. My pop lived his life the ideal American way. Started from nothing, enlisted in the Air Force, married a Korean woman. Went officer at her request amid his many protests. Kept going to school. Earned six engineering degrees. Made a mint in the private sector after 25 years of service. Bought two parcels of land in the mountains and had plans with my mother to build a house there after retirement. With a year and a half to go, diagnosed with mesothelioma. Within 7 months, he was gone. Rough couple of months for all of us at the end there.
So here's the thing. You can do everything right and still be cheated of your goals. He and my mother lived so frugally and fought so hard planning for life instead of living it. It's smart to plan wisely for the future, and that shouldn't be discarded. My mother is still furious about this 20 years later. No matter your struggle, find a way to get the good coffee sometimes instead of the cheap stuff. Take a weekend and get out with the friends or family. You can't control when the bad shit happens so make sure you did your share of living along the way.
Yeah. Especially rule number one at work.
You can never work hard enough to make up the work of multiple people, so don't settle for that. Rather, make use of people. See ahead and implement plans, don't be reactive. I've seen far too many workaholics fall for the trap.
It's good for you that the christian family thing works for you.groups and cliques and clans aren't family no matter how much you tell yourself they are
It's good for you that the christian family thing works for you.
Don't suppose it does for everybody else, though.
It actually dose have a small amount of methamphetamineadderall is meth ~ somerset
Have a wank then think about whether you should hit that
Mine is similar. I was thinking about it last Black Friday weekend.Live within your means.
see the world or become a tourist in your city.
Take time for yourself.
work to live not live to work.
And, she doesn't exist. Find a 75% girl and optimize over time. A bespoke, custom-made partner > off the rack perfection. Lord knows she's going to do that to you too.The girl of your dreams is never going to just come to you. If you want someone, you got to put in the effort for it.
Use stalls. If they are all taken, shake longer or just deal with the last drop being absorbed by your undergarments.
Something else I've seen a lot of lately is dudes leaning into the urinal, leaning against it with their legs. I admire their concern for not peeing on the floor, or not wanting other dudes to see their peepee, but that thing is coated in piss.Don't be that dude who stands in the stall and pisses all over the seat. Assholes who do this should lose their dick privileges.
another top tip. wash your balls in urinal pee for freshness and extra pubesSomething else I've seen a lot of lately is dudes leaning into the urinal, leaning against it with their legs. I admire their concern for not peeing on the floor, or not wanting other dudes to see their peepee, but that thing is coated in piss.
Something else I've seen a lot of lately is dudes leaning into the urinal, leaning against it with their legs. I admire their concern for not peeing on the floor, or not wanting other dudes to see their peepee, but that thing is coated in piss.
What about those of us who are considerate and don’t want to make other guys feel inadequate?If your dick is so tiny that you are embarrassed of other guys seeing it then you are in the wrong bathroom.
hmmWhen ordering food online, make sure you select honey mustard and not accidentally honey to go with your chicken nuggets.