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[AtomskEater]

Does anyone know what a colorist patriarchy is?

I'd assume the "colorist" bit refers to non-white cultures where lighter skinned people are considered more attractive.

 

[DongBeetle]

White people are the majority in America so by sheer numbers you are more likely to get with a white person. It's whatever

 

[Imm0rt4l]

Good piece. Any time I see so called "pro-black" brothers or hotep ninjas with a white woman in tow I give em the side eye cause I know IRL they on that

but online it's queen this and queen that

You can't be pro-black if you'll take the first white woman with a fetish over any of the millions of single black women out there.

That's why Pac dumped Madonna. LOL

lmao

 

[Ross61]

Good piece. Any time I see so called "pro-black" brothers or hotep ninjas with a white woman in tow I give em the side eye cause I know IRL they on that

but online it's queen this and queen that

You can't be pro-black if you'll take the first white woman with a fetish over any of the millions of single black women out there.

You can be pro-black with a white women. You just can't be slandering black women to make white women seem better.

 

[Marmaladefire]

Love whoever feels right, just don't take anyone down to validate it, and don't pretend that there is no societal influence/consequence in who you choose. If you do, it'll be really hard on your kids (particularly your daughters) anyway.

 

[Imm0rt4l]

You can be pro-black with a white women. You just can't be slandering black women to make white women seem better.

Right. I think whats important to take from that comment or emphasize is "the first"-- as in you privilege the first shot at white women over the abundance of black women because "white is just inherently better"/trading up.

 

[Nydius]

You can't be pro-black if you'll take the first white woman with a fetish over any of the millions of single black women out there.

WTF? This reminds me of all the (ridiculous) slandering Serena Williams got on social media by black men and women when the news broke that she was dating a white guy. Endless streams of black folks tearing her down, calling her all manner of names - everything from embarrassment to traitor to Uncle Tom - with hyperbole cranked up to 11. It was as if Serena somehow revoked being African-American simply because she fell in love with a white guy.

Many of the same vile comments appeared on social media when the news broke regarding her pregnancy following the Australian Open.

In eggandland, Serena being with a white guy means she can't be pro-black? Quite possibly one of the best role models for black girls and you'd throw that all in the trash because she is in love with a white man?

 

[AuthenticM]

You just can't be slandering black women to make white women seem better.

Who's dumb enough to do this? And in what context do they do this? I've never witnessed someone do this, so I'm trying to understand their mindset.

I mean, I get that racist white people would do this, obviously. But what about other races?

(I'm a white guy from Canada, for what it's worth)

 

[PabloBolivar]

Love whoever feels right, just don't take anyone down to validate it, and don't pretend that there is no societal influence/consequence in who you choose. If you do, it'll be really hard on your kids (particularly your daughters) anyway.

Please elaborate.

 

[lightskintwin]

Who's dumb enough to do this? And in what context do they do this? I've never witnessed someone do this, so I'm trying to understand their mindset.

I mean, I get that racist white people would do this, obviously. But what about other races?

(I'm a white guy from Canada, for what it's worth)

LOL I've witnessed plenty of people do this. The funniest context is when she doesn't bring much to the table, and then the guy goes, "but she's white tho" . Implying it's still an upgrade.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Who's dumb enough to do this? And in what context do they do this? I've never witnessed someone do this, so I'm trying to understand their mindset.

I mean, I get that racist white people would do this, obviously. But what about other races?

(I'm a white guy from Canada, for what it's worth)

Black women get a lot of disrespect from everybody. A lot of people take liberty to be pieces of shit toward black women. All sorts of dumb ass stereotypes and people with a lot of nerve.

(I'm a black guy from Canada with a black sister).

People say some bullshit things about black women. It's entirely unfair

 

[Marmaladefire]

Please elaborate.

Which part? You shouldn't take people down to validate your own relationship because it's mean and insecure. You shouldn't pretend that there are no societal implications to your interracial relationship, because there always are, depending on the dynamic between those two races and genders. I say this as someone who's been perceived a certain way while being around/with White or East Asian men. Am I trying to "escape" my race, blah, blah, etc.

And being terrible to women of your race will fuck up your daughters, because if she's not white passing (or passing of the opposite, socially dominate race) it looks/feels like a wholesale rejection of her. Trying to breed "undesirable" ethnic traits out of girls, having a whole half of her family who doesn't "get" it, and you not really having her back because you don't really care for women of your race, that kind of thing. Boys can be like like you and find a woman like their mother. They don't have to internalized race based sexism and compare it to their own self worth.

 

[GKnight]

Love whoever feels right, just don't take anyone down to validate it, and don't pretend that there is no societal influence/consequence in who you choose. If you do, it'll be really hard on your kids (particularly your daughters) anyway.

This can be true of intraracial marriages too, especially where the lighter skinned daughters are given preferential treatment.

 

[Imm0rt4l]

This can be true of intraracial marriages too, especially where the lighter skinned daughters are given preferential treatment.

This reminds me. Theres this video of this Dominican black dude who consoling his daughter who is light skinned/biracial. It's meant to be heart felt/sweet or whatever.

Dude has another daughter, a darker skinned black girl. And the treatment he gives them on just social media alone is like night and day. calling the darker skinned one an accident(wear condoms), and calling the light skinned one his princess, twin, fave etc.

He was called out on it.

 

[lightskintwin]

This reminds me. Theres this video of this Dominican black dude who consoling his daughter who is light skinned/biracial. It's meant to be heart felt/sweet or whatever.

Dude has another daughter, a darker skinned black girl. And the treatment he gives them on just social media alone is like night and day. calling the darker skinned one an accident(wear condoms), and calling the light skinned one his princess, twin, fave etc.

He was called out on it.

One of my best friends is light skin and his sister is dark skin, despite them both having the same African American parents. They don't get along now as adults, and my friend believes there's been a growing resentment his sister has had for him ever since they were children and the preferential treatment she witnessed other people give him particularly women due to his light skin.

 

[Imm0rt4l]

One of my best friends is light skin and his sister is dark skin, despite them both having the same African American parents. They don't get along now as adults, and my friend believes there's been a growing resentment his sister has had for him ever since they were children and the preferential treatment she witnessed other people give him particularly women due to his light skin.

Yeah, I mean, kids are aware enough to understand and internalize what is happening. It's sad to see it manifest like this, but it's not surprising to me.

 

[Mr_Antimatter]

Black women get a lot of disrespect from everybody. A lot of people take liberty to be pieces of shit toward black women. All sorts of dumb ass stereotypes and people with a lot of nerve.

(I'm a black guy from Canada with a black sister).

People say some bullshit things about black women. It's entirely unfair

My mom is half black, but fair skinned enough to pass as ether white, or more realistically, mexican or native american. Given she lives in medium town texas, she doesn't go out of her way to correct anyones ideas about her race.

Probably annoyed her that I was always very frank of my heritage when asked. Hell, I am proud of it.

Never seen anyone give me greif for my own marriage (i'm married to a Chinese woman) nor for my son. Hell, my son has gotten good remarks from my wife's Asian friends and family for looking so Asian.

 

[lightskintwin]

Yeah, I mean, kids are aware enough to understand and internalize what is happening. It's sad to see it manifest like this, but it's not surprising to me.

It probably doesn't help that my best friend is a conceited, arrogant asshole though. LMAO

 

[grandwizard]

Speaking of people who go out of their way to talk trash about the opposite sex of their own race, someone posted this link earlier: http://www.aprilmag.com/2017/06/24/we-need-to-talk-about-the-asian-women-who-hate-on-asian-men/

And it introduced me to this awful comic

This article ties into a larger trend of Asian women publicly vocalizing disdain for their Asian male counterparts. Gina Choe and Jenny An both felt compelled to broadcast their Asian-exclusionary dating preferences on public platforms. Comedian Esther Ku routinely exploits (false) stereotypes of Asian men during her shows. A couple months ago, she even tweeted a video thanking United Airlines for assaulting Dr. David Dao.

 

[SRG01]

There were two, and both were from online dating sites/apps. The one that wasn't OKCupid had a sample size of 2.4 million, though - pretty significant. Maybe it's not a be-all-end-all study, but I can't hand-wave the evidence either. Marmalade's on-point.

Well, the US Census plus the Pew Research center did look at various rates of marriage (and divorce). https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interracial_marriage_in_the_United_States

From the Pew Research Center in 2010:

- A record 15.1% of all new marriages in the United States were between spouses of a different race or ethnicity from one another. This compares to 8.4% of all current marriages regardless of when they occurred. This includes marriages between a Hispanic and non-Hispanic (Hispanics are an ethnic group, not a race) as well as marriages between spouses of different races – be they white, black, Asian, American Indian or those who identify as being of multiple races or some other race.
- Among all newlyweds, 9.4% of whites, 17.1% of blacks, 25.7% of Hispanics and 27.7% of Asians married someone whose race or ethnicity was different from their own.
- Among all newlyweds, intermarried pairings were primarily White-Hispanic (43.3%) as compared to White-Asian (14.4%), White-Black (11.9%), and Other Combinations (30.4%). Other combinations consists of pairings between different minority groups, multi-racial people, and American Indians.
- Among all newlyweds, native-born Hispanics and Asians were far more likely to intermarry than foreign-born Hispanics and Asians: 36.2% of native-born Hispanics (both men and women) out-married compared to 14.2% of foreign-born Hispanics; 32% of native-born Asian men out-married compared to 11% of foreign-born Asian men; 43% of native-born Asian women out-married compared to 34% of foreign-born Asian women. Foreign-born excludes immigrants who arrived married.
- Gender patterns in intermarriage vary widely. Some 24% of all black male newlyweds in 2010 married outside their race, compared with just 9% of black female newlyweds. Among Asians, the gender pattern runs the other way. Some 36% of Asian female newlyweds married outside their race in 2010, compared with just 17% of Asian male newlyweds. Among whites and Hispanics, by contrast, there are no gender differences in intermarriage rates.
- Rates of intermarriages among newlyweds in the U.S. have nearly tripled since 1980 (6.7%) increasing to 14.6% in 2008 and 15.1% in 2010.
- There is a strong regional pattern to intermarriage. Among all new marriages in 2010, 22% in the West were interracial or interethnic, compared with 14% in the South, 13% in the Northeast and 11% in the Midwest.

 

[D i Z]

Please don't go full-on us vs. them both Asian men and Black women are just viewed super shittily by Western society

I don't think that anyone is playing oppression olympics just yet, but the commonality between the different groups is helping to frame the conversation in terms a little more familiar for some.

 

[Shaanyboi]

I read a post in a similar vein yesterday that was complaining that Film/TV only portrays secular Muslims. A fair point, but I don't know if these criticisms stick in this case since it's based off his life.

The Only Muslims Hollywood Likes Are The 'Secular' Ones

Like the article in the OP, it's incredibly shitty to try and use The Big Sick, largely based on the actor's actual experience with his wife, as the jumping off point for their soapbox about representation.

 

[erragal]

Ahh yes. Just what 2017 asked for...the war on interracial marriages with white people by shaming non white people as doing it for class privileges.

melanin based tribalism, we're silly apes indeed.

 

[Marmaladefire]

Speaking of people who go out of their way to talk trash about the opposite sex of their own race, someone posted this link earlier: http://www.aprilmag.com/2017/06/24/we-need-to-talk-about-the-asian-women-who-hate-on-asian-men/

And it introduced me to this awful comic

Yikes. Not cute. No.



Just out of curiosity, I wonder about the way South East Asian men vs East Asian men are perceived? East Asian and SE Asian women aren't looked at as the same, so I would think the same is true for the men. While representation isn't huge for them, South East and South Asian men seem to be doing better in regard to getting projects off of the ground and gaining visibility, while there is only one current prominent example of mainstream East Asian men in a leading role in US media that I can think of (Fresh Off the Boat), which does happen to feature an intra-racial marriage. Hawaii 5-0 was on too but there goes that.

It's so bad that the whole internet was clenching in fear of Disney writing one of their best male love interests (and characters, period) out of Mulan all together. On the otherhand, no one is scare that Aladdin won't be the right race, it's a matter of whether they'll make everyone super light, which isn't how the original was.

 

[Armaros]

Yikes. Not cute. No.



Just out of curiosity, I wonder about the way South East Asian men vs East Asian men are perceived? East Asian and SE Asian women aren't looked at as the same, so I would think the same is true for the men. While representation isn't huge for them, South East and South Asian men seem to be doing better in regard to getting projects off of the ground and gaining visibility, while there is only one current prominent example of mainstream East Asian men in a leading role in US media that I can think of (Fresh Off the Boat), which does happen to feature an intra-racial marriage. Hawaii 5-0 was on too but there goes that.

It's so bad that the whole internet was clenching in fear of Disney writing one of their best male love interests (and characters, period) out of Mulan all together. On the otherhand, no one is scare that Aladdin won't be the right race, it's a matter of whether they'll make everyone super light, which isn't how the original was.

Most East Asian male actors either go back to their respective countries and become big stars there or settle for minor and/or stereotypical roles in Hollywood.

That's why many of the big east Asian stars from the 90s all disappeared and never came back and no one replaced them.

This just so happens to correlate with many of those nation's domestic movie scenes heating up. Why be a stereotyped minority actor when you can be a megastar in your nation of origin.

 

[J_ToSaveTheDay]

I'm mixed-race, my mother is Korean and my dad is white. I felt the urge to drop in and offer some anecdotal experiences, but I find in past conversations that it ends up being entirely meaningless in the long run.

What I really want to just say is that I can't tell where the fuck to stand on mixed race issues anymore. Every time I think I'm "liberal" and "open-minded" about the issue, some liberal-leaning publication puts out a piece like this that makes me feel like my thoughts aren't actually all that open-minded after all. Obviously, the blatantly racist notions that get attributed to conservatism aren't at all appealing, either, so it's not like I'm about to turn coat and join their ranks.

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

So, y'know what, I just feel stuck. I always felt at odds with larger American culture just by the very existence of being mixed-race and never feeling accepted by either white Americans or Koreans as a culturally pure example of humanhood... And I guess it's just going to fucking stay that way.

Frustrating as shit the way this gets presented all the time. I know critics aren't necessarily out to make people guilty around the clock, but it's really starting to feel like I can't say or do a damn thing anymore without "but, well, there's this thing that gets excluded by that mindset..."

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

 

[D i Z]

I'm mixed-race, my mother is Korean and my dad is white. I felt the urge to drop in and offer some anecdotal experiences, but I find in past conversations that it ends up being entirely meaningless in the long run.

What I really want to just say is that I can't tell where the fuck to stand on mixed race issues anymore. Every time I think I'm "liberal" and "open-minded" about the issue, some liberal-leaning publication puts out a piece like this that makes me feel like my thoughts aren't actually all that open-minded after all. Obviously, the blatantly racist notions that get attributed to conservatism aren't at all appealing, either, so it's not like I'm about to turn coat and join their ranks.

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

So, y'know what, I just feel stuck. I always felt at odds with larger American culture just by the very existence of being mixed-race and never feeling accepted by either white Americans or Koreans as a culturally pure example of humanhood... And I guess it's just going to fucking stay that way.

Frustrating as shit the way this gets presented all the time. I know critics aren't necessarily out to make people guilty around the clock, but it's really starting to feel like I can't say or do a damn thing anymore without "but, well, there's this thing that gets excluded by that mindset..."

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

Can you articulate your position? Start with the topic at hand and go from there I guess.

 

[Rentahamster]

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

*hugs* I feel ya bro.

 

[lightskintwin]

I'm mixed-race, my mother is Korean and my dad is white. I felt the urge to drop in and offer some anecdotal experiences, but I find in past conversations that it ends up being entirely meaningless in the long run.

What I really want to just say is that I can't tell where the fuck to stand on mixed race issues anymore. Every time I think I'm "liberal" and "open-minded" about the issue, some liberal-leaning publication puts out a piece like this that makes me feel like my thoughts aren't actually all that open-minded after all. Obviously, the blatantly racist notions that get attributed to conservatism aren't at all appealing, either, so it's not like I'm about to turn coat and join their ranks.

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

So, y'know what, I just feel stuck. I always felt at odds with larger American culture just by the very existence of being mixed-race and never feeling accepted by either white Americans or Koreans as a culturally pure example of humanhood... And I guess it's just going to fucking stay that way.

Frustrating as shit the way this gets presented all the time. I know critics aren't necessarily out to make people guilty around the clock, but it's really starting to feel like I can't say or do a damn thing anymore without "but, well, there's this thing that gets excluded by that mindset..."

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

Bruh, I'm liberal and there's a lot I don't agree with in some "liberal" type criticism and that's OK. This type of criticism has always existed, however the majority of people simply didn't notice because it usually was printed in some high end magazine or newspaper article. The Internet and all of these Blog news sites have simply brought that type of criticism front and center often times by someone less equipped of making the arguments than there were in the past.

 

[TickleMeElbow]

Speaking of people who go out of their way to talk trash about the opposite sex of their own race, someone posted this link earlier: http://www.aprilmag.com/2017/06/24/we-need-to-talk-about-the-asian-women-who-hate-on-asian-men/

And it introduced me to this awful comic

Yeah I met a few of these in college. One in a class called "Asian American Experience" of all things. We were talking about me being half Asian, and she started telling me she only dates white guys because she wants "cute halfie babies".

I'm sitting there thinking to myself "so only half white babies are cute or some shit?"

 

[Poor GRIMES]

Yeah I met a few of these in college. One in a class called "Asian American Experience" of all things. We were talking about me being half Asian, and she started telling me she only dates white guys because she wants "cute halfie babies".

I'm sitting there thinking to myself "so only half white babies are cute or some shit?"

Some people internalize their self-hatred to breed out their "ethnic" features for more Eurocentric features. I always found it a strange concept. So girl you really gonna treat yourself like some kinda breeding device so you can incubate some biracial children?

Is it really worth it?

 

[Mammoth Jones]

You can be pro-black with a white women. You just can't be slandering black women to make white women seem better.

This. I got tons of friends with White spouses. No problem.

But I have ONE guy I used to be friends with that has said the foulest shit about Black women and it drove me up the wall. Like dude, you wanna be with a White girl do your thing but you don't have to shit on the Black women to make your shit seem somehow better.

I hate self hating mofos of any ethnicity.

Some people internalize their self-hatred to breed out their "ethnic" features for more Eurocentric features. I always found it a strange concept. So girl you really gonna treat yourself like some kinda breeding device so you can incubate some biracial children?

Is it really worth it?

When they're raised on a steady media diet of Eurocentric standards of beauty it's bound to happen.

 

[TickleMeElbow]

Some people internalize their self-hatred to breed out their "ethnic" features for more Eurocentric features. I always found it a strange concept. So girl you really gonna treat yourself like some kinda breeding device so you can incubate some biracial children?

Is it really worth it?

I wonder if she would be mad if her halfie child decided to marry an Asian person like "fuck I was trying to breed that shit out of my genetic line!"

I wish I would've thought to ask her that back then lol.

 

[riotous]

Pretty crazy to think that people hook up inside their race for shitty reasons, and people also hook up outside their race for shitty reasons.

Humans are shitty (sometimes.)

 

[Sami+]

If I used the "I can write your name in Arabic" party trick the first time I met my Filipino girlfriend does that still count as me doing a bad thing

paging jezebel

 

[TickleMeElbow]

If I used the "I can write your name in Arabic" party trick the first time I met my Filipino girlfriend does that still count as me doing a bad thing

paging jezebel

Nah apparently it's only bad if the woman is white.

 

[Furyous]

I'm the reverse of title of this article as in anti racist against people interracial relationships. Whenever I see a mixed race couple I think "yes! the diaspora is expanding". Diaspora can mean any diaspora by the way. More cultural mixing decreases the likelihood of encountering white supremacists and that is such a great thing.

Just be happy with whatever spouse you find and don't get caught up all the racial stuff. Don't get too caught up in another person's relationship and focus on being a better person in order to attract that significant other you seek and maintain that relationship.

I became happy as shit when the younger McCain married the young sister. A black McCain is going to be great for America. This child's parents are two American military veterans on top of coming from a Maverick lineage. Imagine John McCain taking his grandson to a black barbershop asking for the 1 all around, critiquing the fade.

 

[Erevador]

I'm mixed-race, my mother is Korean and my dad is white. I felt the urge to drop in and offer some anecdotal experiences, but I find in past conversations that it ends up being entirely meaningless in the long run.

What I really want to just say is that I can't tell where the fuck to stand on mixed race issues anymore. Every time I think I'm "liberal" and "open-minded" about the issue, some liberal-leaning publication puts out a piece like this that makes me feel like my thoughts aren't actually all that open-minded after all. Obviously, the blatantly racist notions that get attributed to conservatism aren't at all appealing, either, so it's not like I'm about to turn coat and join their ranks.

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

So, y'know what, I just feel stuck. I always felt at odds with larger American culture just by the very existence of being mixed-race and never feeling accepted by either white Americans or Koreans as a culturally pure example of humanhood... And I guess it's just going to fucking stay that way.

Frustrating as shit the way this gets presented all the time. I know critics aren't necessarily out to make people guilty around the clock, but it's really starting to feel like I can't say or do a damn thing anymore without "but, well, there's this thing that gets excluded by that mindset..."

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

It's okay to be an individual and just follow your own conscience. You can listen to everyone, but keep your own counsel. Be a heretic. Follow your convictions.

Don't let anyone conscript you to their team without your permission.

 

[Sami+]

Nah apparently it's only bad if the woman is white.

phew thank god for a second I thought I was racist against myself

 

[GKnight]

Pretty crazy to think that people hook up inside their race for shitty reasons, and people also hook up outside their race for shitty reasons.

Humans are shitty (sometimes.)

The way you guys make it sound youd think nobody actually dates anybody because they like and are attracted to that person

 

[riotous]

The way you guys make it sound youd think nobody actually dates anybody because they like and are attracted to that person

(sometimes.)

People do both of the things I described... in no way does that imply it's the only reason people hook up... and since this is NeoGaf, I even threw a "sometimes" in my post so someone didn't predictably claim I was acting like it's the only reason people hook up.

I almost typed something like "obviously most people just hook up out of attraction, just remarking on those that have prejudice either way".. but I thought, nah.. "sometimes" should be enough.

thisisneogaf.gif

 

[GKnight]

People do both of the things I described... in no way does that imply it's the only reason people hook up... and since this is NeoGaf, I even threw a "sometimes" in my post so someone didn't predictably claim I was acting like it's the only reason people hook up.

I almost typed something like "obviously most people just hook up out of attraction, just remarking on those that have prejudice either way".. but I thought, nah.. "sometimes" should be enough.

thisisneogaf.gif

Im not just referring to you just the conversation in general.
But it's a necessary byproduct of the topic at hand, I suppose.

I like to think people tend to get together because they enjoy each others company and regardless of fetishism or self hate most won't stay with someone they aren't compatible with.
Although some will and that is a whole other issue.

 

[riotous]

I like to think people tend to get together because they enjoy each others company and regardless of fetishism or self hate most won't stay with someone they aren't compatible with.

Yeah for sure; but people are discussing people who preemptively declare they won't date certain people, or who will never date certain people. I'd like to think most people aren't that way, but some people will tell just about anyone they meet their racist and/or self-hating dating preferences.

I was just remarking on the dichotomy that this involves people who will only date their race, and people who will never date their race.

 

[TissueBox]

I thought this was supposed to be a conversation about racial implications and representation in media, not rl..

 

[godhandiscen]

I like to date women with a well established career and minority women with a career will ignore me while white women are more
approachable.

A blanket statement about minority men having a fetish for white women is ridiculous.

 

[HariKari]

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

Don't get too hung up on it. Just be good and good to others, keep an open mind. A lot of the 'arguments' made by articles like this one are academic in nature and don't really reflect real life. Progress isn't nearly as fast as the typing ability of someone that wants to push an angle. It's also not your job to deal with any of this. Do what you think is right.

 

[Izuna]

I'm mixed-race, my mother is Korean and my dad is white. I felt the urge to drop in and offer some anecdotal experiences, but I find in past conversations that it ends up being entirely meaningless in the long run.

What I really want to just say is that I can't tell where the fuck to stand on mixed race issues anymore. Every time I think I'm "liberal" and "open-minded" about the issue, some liberal-leaning publication puts out a piece like this that makes me feel like my thoughts aren't actually all that open-minded after all. Obviously, the blatantly racist notions that get attributed to conservatism aren't at all appealing, either, so it's not like I'm about to turn coat and join their ranks.

So, I'm just confused, and frankly both the liberal and the conservative outlooks feel extremely alienating these days. I know liberal GAF likes to pop off a "moderate mindsets just lend strength to bigotry" attitude about a middle ground, but I'd argue the middle ground exists not because we want to make peace with bigots, but because both bigots and the righteousness-by-critical-espousal liberalism are both increasingly alienating, and both feel like I can't live a substantive, unambigiously fulfilling life without some shitty hang ups making me feel guilt about every fucking thing I think or do.

So, y'know what, I just feel stuck. I always felt at odds with larger American culture just by the very existence of being mixed-race and never feeling accepted by either white Americans or Koreans as a culturally pure example of humanhood... And I guess it's just going to fucking stay that way.

Frustrating as shit the way this gets presented all the time. I know critics aren't necessarily out to make people guilty around the clock, but it's really starting to feel like I can't say or do a damn thing anymore without "but, well, there's this thing that gets excluded by that mindset..."

GAF, what the hell do I have to do to just ... fit in someplace.

Don't pay too much attention to it, I am gobsmacked at the silliness here as well. People aren't getting how offensive the OG title was to mixed raced people. Best not to think about it and just love who the hell you want.

 

[PabloBolivar]

Don't pay too much attention to it, I am gobsmacked at the silliness here as well. People aren't getting how offensive the OG title was to mixed raced people. Best not to think about it and just love who the hell you want.

So basically just ignore societal pressures? Pretend they don't exist? Not that easy Izuna.

 

[LionPride]

Don't pay too much attention to it, I am gobsmacked at the silliness here as well. People aren't getting how offensive the OG title was to mixed raced people. Best not to think about it and just love who the hell you want.

And you've been missin the entire issue

 

[D i Z]

I thought this was supposed to be a conversation about racial implications and representation in media, not rl..

Thread title change tanked any chance of that convo surfacing again.