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[Joe]

girls online are SUPER flaky, its just a fact. if you meet a girl online EXPECT to be flaked on, just expect it.

if you work on your real world game youll have much better success.

if you rely on online dating for your dates you will become a bitter and broken man very quickly. online dating should just be a casual supplement.

shit, i bet a lot of girls make an online profile with no intention of meeting anyone but just to boost their ego.

this is all obvious it just needs to be reinforced.

 

[Hylian7]

Just got back. Holy shit everything went better than expected!

I was kind of worried, I went into the restaurant at the time we scheduled, and she wasn't there yet. About 5 minutes after she texted me saying she was on her way. 5 minutes later she got there. Dear god, she was even more gorgeous than her pics on OKC looked.

I gave her a hug, we asked for a table and sat down and waited. We started talking about our days, things like that. We got a table sometime in there, and just kept talking the whole time. It went on for 2 and a half hours! Topics went from anything to everything, although I think I sort of had a problem bringing up subjects, because I was avoiding talking about my ex at all, and some things I wanted to say in my head involved her, so they were a no-go.

I learned that she's really shy about approaching people, which is why she got on OKC in the first place. She really came out of her shell when she was talking to me though.

We had to leave because she noticed her phone vibrated (apparently it had been vibrating the whole time, but she didn't notice til then), and her roommate's dog escaped and she had to go help get it back in. She said it was nice meeting me though, and she was interested in another date!

Fuck yeah!

 

[Slayer-33]

Just got back. Holy shit everything went better than expected!

I was kind of worried, I went into the restaurant at the time we scheduled, and she wasn't there yet. About 5 minutes after she texted me saying she was on her way. 5 minutes later she got there. Dear god, she was even more gorgeous than her pics on OKC looked.

I gave her a hug, we asked for a table and sat down and waited. We started talking about our days, things like that. We got a table sometime in there, and just kept talking the whole time. It went on for 2 and a half hours! Topics went from anything to everything, although I think I sort of had a problem bringing up subjects, because I was avoiding talking about my ex at all, and some things I wanted to say in my head involved her, so they were a no-go.

I learned that she's really shy about approaching people, which is why she got on OKC in the first place. She really came out of her shell when she was talking to me though.

We had to leave because she noticed her phone vibrated (apparently it had been vibrating the whole time, but she didn't notice til then), and her roommate's dog escaped and she had to go help get it back in. She said it was nice meeting me though, and she was interested in another date!

Fuck yeah!

What the fuck.


Shouldn't be longer than 40 mins mang! lol


Anyway sounds good but that last part was iffy lol... Hopefully everything works out.

 

[Hylian7]

What the fuck.


Shouldn't be longer than 40 mins mang! lol


Anyway sounds good but that last part was iffy lol... Hopefully everything works out.

I wasn't aware there was any kind of hard and fast rule on that, or are you being sarcastic? I can't tell....

About the last part, she said to text her, so I don't really have any reason to believe that was some excuse. In fact earlier she said she still had a 5 page paper to write tonight that's due at 8am.

 

[Tess3ract]

He's being dumb or something. You can talk that long. If both of you are talking that long right off the bat that's an indicator of something good, at least in my experience.

 

[hawkshockey11]

What the fuck.


Shouldn't be longer than 40 mins mang! lol


Anyway sounds good but that last part was iffy lol... Hopefully everything works out.

not always the case. A girl at work I am friends with went on a breakfast date with a guy and he turned it into an all day date. At first when she told me I was expecting her to say it was awful, but she loved it.

 

[Slayer-33]

I wasn't aware there was any kind of hard and fast rule on that, or are you being sarcastic? I can't tell....

About the last part, she said to text her, so I don't really have any reason to believe that was some excuse. In fact earlier she said she still had a 5 page paper to write tonight that's due at 8am.

No it is the norm and generally how long a first date should be.

So you keep interests level higher and go for a pretty long 2nd date, like bowling/food/amusement park/ 3+ hour event etc.

He's being dumb or something. You can talk that long. If both of you are talking that long right off the bat that's an indicator of something good, at least in my experience.

No I'm not being dumb.

2 and 1/2 hours talking on a first date? The fuck dude? I hope it worked out for him, I'm just saying in general for future dates for people in here. The getting to know the person better can come at later dates and people will be way more relaxed for 2nd ones.

1st date is a crazy check and a "quick" get to know the person sit down.

I'm not saying that it can't work but yeah.. Keep it short and simple the first time.

 

[Hylian7]

He's being dumb or something. You can talk that long. If both of you are talking that long right off the bat that's an indicator of something good, at least in my experience.

That's what I figured....I didn't see any reason why that would be a bad thing. We were just getting to know each other better.

No it is the norm and generally how long a first date should be.

So you keep interests level higher and go for a pretty long 2nd date, like bowling/food/amusement park/ 3+ hour event etc.

Actually the plan is to play pool. She said she really likes playing pool.

One question: Would it be TOO soon to try to have that date be this Thursday? The reason I'm in such a hurry is because our Spring Break is next week, and doing something during that week will probably not work at all, so it would have to wait until after that. Unless of course, I can find a place to stay in my college's town. Or I could just drive up there for a date, it's only a 2.5 hour drive, but it beats the hell out of sitting in my parents house doing nothing.

 

[butimnotarapper]

Just got back. Holy shit everything went better than expected!

I was kind of worried, I went into the restaurant at the time we scheduled, and she wasn't there yet. About 5 minutes after she texted me saying she was on her way. 5 minutes later she got there. Dear god, she was even more gorgeous than her pics on OKC looked.

I gave her a hug, we asked for a table and sat down and waited. We started talking about our days, things like that. We got a table sometime in there, and just kept talking the whole time. It went on for 2 and a half hours! Topics went from anything to everything, although I think I sort of had a problem bringing up subjects, because I was avoiding talking about my ex at all, and some things I wanted to say in my head involved her, so they were a no-go.

I learned that she's really shy about approaching people, which is why she got on OKC in the first place. She really came out of her shell when she was talking to me though.

We had to leave because she noticed her phone vibrated (apparently it had been vibrating the whole time, but she didn't notice til then), and her roommate's dog escaped and she had to go help get it back in. She said it was nice meeting me though, and she was interested in another date!

Fuck yeah!

Good to hear after your last few posts haha

 

[Neki]

my first date with my girlfriend was like 7 hours, but we were already well acquainted so it's a little different from meeting someone brand new I suppose.

 

[Tess3ract]

What does it matter if it's 1 hour or 2 hours or 7

if you run out of things to say after that first day then you're too boring anyways, so splitting it up into days could help that.

But really it's just comfort levels, if you're both okay with sitting around taking for 2+ hours more power to you, especially if it works out.

 

[mcrae]

honestly, unless one of us has something hard planned that cant be moved, i'm down to go on a first date that last 5+ hours. sure, planning on it only taking an hour or less is most prudent, but if things are going well why not stay where you are and continue or move locations and continue hanging out. really weird to think of cutting it short intentionally just because its the first date.

 

[Mordeccai]

Congrats.

And yeah pretty normal. The opposite too, *cough* Usually you'll be able to go after fucking a few more times.

As for your second question, don't worry about it right now. Just keep going and see where life takes you.

Thanks for the reply man. Guess it is better to perform and not finish, than to finish and not perform!

Lucky bastard. >:\

So a few of my buddies have told me.... I dunno. It was quite interesting. Willing to give it a shot. Really, really caught me off guard though. My back is destroyed with scratches.

I've had the same issues and questions. The first woman was someone I got extremely attached to but I haven't felt much of anything after the others. You rarely, if ever, get any closer to someone than during sex, so a connection would be fairly normal I think. But so is the opposite. It's a lot better than deluding yourself into thinking you're falling in love just because you shared a bed for a couple of hours.

As for lasting a long time, I don't know. It's the only kind of experience I've had and I think it's nervousness and stage fright too. I sure hope so at least And no, asking someone to choke them isn't standard procedure, hehe.

Yeah, there is definitely no delusion here for me. The thing I'm worried about is actually her getting attached. The day after was no different, but today is a totally different story. I can tell she's been thinking about me (or the experience) more because her texts have been wayyy more overt.

Last night she was drunk and texted me quite a lot, which was alright, but they were definitely texts coming from a lady who is getting attached. I would write them here but they're literally two texts long each, huge paragraphs. Talking about how she first had a crush on me four years ago, how I'm so sweet to her and how she really likes my body and shit. Apparently my kisses give her butterflies.. So I guess I need to ask you all how you'd play this out? Her and I go to different universities in the same state, and I really, really don't have the emotional capacity right now to do anything long distance. We're on spring break now so we can hang out, but afterwards? I'm just not up for the task. The texts have continued on in the same fashion today, and she's not been drunk all day long haha, so it wasn't just drunk texting.

Should I lay everything out on the table next time we meet? Like tell her my view and what I'm comfortable with doing and what not? I've hurt the past few girls I've been with and I want to avoid doing that again.


Anddd for those of you calling me lucky... have any interesting things to try out in the sack? I'm open to suggestions haha. I'm sure she'd love the surprise as well.

 

[luckyboyceo]

I completely disagree with the idea that dates should have a hard time limit on them. There's a difference between cutting them short and dragging it on.

It doesn't matter if it's 40 minutes of 4 hours, if both of you have a good time and are enjoying yourselves for the duration of the date then it's a success. It's when you drag it on that it becomes a problem.

My first 2 dates with the girl I'm seeing now both were 3 hours a piece. As corny as it sounds, they felt like 30 minutes. It wasn't until I looked at my phone that I realized how long we had been out.

What I'm trying to say is that time isn't important. If she has a good time, she's going to go out with you again. Plain and simple.

 

[Devolution]

No it is the norm and generally how long a first date should be.

So you keep interests level higher and go for a pretty long 2nd date, like bowling/food/amusement park/ 3+ hour event etc.



No I'm not being dumb.

2 and 1/2 hours talking on a first date? The fuck dude? I hope it worked out for him, I'm just saying in general for future dates for people in here. The getting to know the person better can come at later dates and people will be way more relaxed for 2nd ones.

1st date is a crazy check and a "quick" get to know the person sit down.

I'm not saying that it can't work but yeah.. Keep it short and simple the first time.

This sounds fucking dumb I'm sorry. If she genuinely enjoys your company why not make it as long as she wants? What is this time limit shit. Do what feels natural and comfortable. Just cutting and running because you think dates should be under some arbitrary time limit is stupid. This is when people over think the process and fuck themselves over.

 

[Ezalc]

Alright people I need a bit of help with something, but first I'll recount the tale:


This past weekend I went to a college graduation with my cousin. His friend was one of the graduates so she got tickets for me, my cousin, and his two other friends to attend the party. While there I danced with a very fine Brasian, but I was a dumbass in that even though I danced with her more than once that night I never got her name or number and I didn't kiss her or anything either. Yes, yes complete lack of tact but whatever, the next morning I talk to my cousin and decide to try and find her on facebook using a bit of personal information she told me like her hometown and her major. I couldn't find her through search but luckily the my cousin's friend, the one who was graduating, was friends with her so I sent her a friend request to which she accepted.

Now then, how do I approach her? Should I just go straight to asking her out? She lives in another city which is a little over an hour away from me, what's worse is that I don't really know that city so if I ask her out I wouldn't know where to take her there, if she came to visit my city it'd make things much easier but I'm not about to ask her to make the trip when I've only met her once. Should I just try and make conversation with her? When I danced with her I tried to talk to her some it was a bit awkward but I chalk that up to my nervousness at the time. Anyways, what do you think?

 

[mcrae]

Alright people I need a bit of help with something, but first I'll recount the tale:


This past weekend I went to a college graduation with my cousin. His friend was one of the graduates so she got tickets for me, my cousin, and his two other friends to attend the party. While there I danced with a very fine Brasian, but I was a dumbass in that even though I danced with her more than once that night I never got her name or number and I didn't kiss her or anything either. Yes, yes complete lack of tact but whatever, the next morning I talk to my cousin and decide to try and find her on facebook using a bit of personal information she told me like her hometown and her major. I couldn't find her through search but luckily the my cousin's friend, the one who was graduating, was friends with her so I sent her a friend request to which she accepted.

Now then, how do I approach her? Should I just go straight to asking her out? She lives in another city which is a little over an hour away from me, what's worse is that I don't really know that city so if I ask her out I wouldn't know where to take her there, if she came to visit my city it'd make things much easier but I'm not about to ask her to make the trip when I've only met her once. Should I just try and make conversation with her? When I danced with her I tried to talk to her some it was a bit awkward but I chalk that up to my nervousness at the time. Anyways, what do you think?

go straight to asking her out. do you know anyone in that town you can ask opinions for places?

if you can find her online and chat for an hour or so you could save everyone some trouble. build some rapport there and ask her to show you her favourite bar 4-5 nights down the line, and make a nice night of it.

if not and you wanna go straight to a date and get to know her then, any random coffee shop will do.

 

[Ezalc]

go straight to asking her out. do you know anyone in that town you can ask opinions for places?

if you can find her online and chat for an hour or so you could save everyone some trouble. build some rapport there and ask her to show you her favourite bar 4-5 nights down the line, and make a nice night of it.

if not and you wanna go straight to a date and get to know her then, any random coffee shop will do.

Yes, she's going to college in my cousin's hometown. He lives in my city but he and his two friends whom I've added on Facebook are always going out so I can ask them for some opinions.

It's only been a few days since I've added her but I've never seen her online on chat. I think she keeps her status to offline. But your idea of asking her to show me one of her favorite bars is a good one. I guess I'll just do both, ask my cousin for a good place to go but ask her to show me her favorite place. I think the only problem is my unfamiliarity of the city which even in picking her up or driving her home could come to bite me in the ass. I think I may need to ask my cousin to borrow his phone for the gps since mine doesn't have it.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Alright people I need a bit of help with something, but first I'll recount the tale:


This past weekend I went to a college graduation with my cousin. His friend was one of the graduates so she got tickets for me, my cousin, and his two other friends to attend the party. While there I danced with a very fine Brasian, but I was a dumbass in that even though I danced with her more than once that night I never got her name or number and I didn't kiss her or anything either. Yes, yes complete lack of tact but whatever, the next morning I talk to my cousin and decide to try and find her on facebook using a bit of personal information she told me like her hometown and her major. I couldn't find her through search but luckily the my cousin's friend, the one who was graduating, was friends with her so I sent her a friend request to which she accepted.

Now then, how do I approach her? Should I just go straight to asking her out? She lives in another city which is a little over an hour away from me, what's worse is that I don't really know that city so if I ask her out I wouldn't know where to take her there, if she came to visit my city it'd make things much easier but I'm not about to ask her to make the trip when I've only met her once. Should I just try and make conversation with her? When I danced with her I tried to talk to her some it was a bit awkward but I chalk that up to my nervousness at the time. Anyways, what do you think?

How'd you get her hometown and major and not her name?

 

[Ezalc]

How'd you get her hometown and major and not her name?

My cousin's friend told me that just walking up to a girl and asking for her name when you go try and dance with her isn't exactly the best strategy. So I got that instead when we talked briefly, by the end of the night I was tired and I went to the second floor of the building to sit and rest for a bit, when I came back I was planning on trying to dance with her again but she had gone home. Also like I said I was a bit of a dumbass, first time doing this etc etc.

 

[mcrae]

Yes, she's going to college in my cousin's hometown. He lives in my city but he and his two friends whom I've added on Facebook are always going out so I can ask them for some opinions.

It's only been a few days since I've added her but I've never seen her online on chat. I think she keeps her status to offline. But your idea of asking her to show me one of her favorite bars is a good one. I guess I'll just do both, ask my cousin for a good place to go but ask her to show me her favorite place. I think the only problem is my unfamiliarity of the city which even in picking her up or driving her home could come to bite me in the ass. I think I may need to ask my cousin to borrow his phone for the gps since mine doesn't have it.

honestly the location doesnt matter too much. i picked up a girl the other day and while i msg'd my friend about what are good places to play pool at, our tentative agreement was to go for smoothies. we got in the car and were at the exit to her apt complex and im like 'so. which way should we turn?' 'i dunno' 'alright, i think im feeling left' so we turned left and then i asked her if she wanted to play pool and where i was going and stuff.

the pretext of going out for smoothies was out of the way, and we went to a place that was closed (lol) before we found another. but it was fun figuring out what we were gonna do, because we had already talked for like 3 hours and were both pretty open minded.

we also got lost on the way home but neither of us cared cause we were talking. the fact that i figured out how to get home when she didnt know where we were was bonus points.

so all im saying is that you don't need to make an issue out of not knowing the city. if she doesnt know where to direct you, then you're both flying blind and make an adventure out of it. if she's a rigid person and expects to go directly to a set location and arrive on time, well yeah maybe bring a gps and plan things very well, in advance.

i would wait to do the 'show me your favourite bar' until you know you want to spent 5+hours alone with her. so 2nd or 3rd date, depending. (unless you chat in length beforehand)

 

[Mordeccai]

My cousin's friend told me that just walking up to a girl and asking for her name when you go try and dance with her isn't exactly the best strategy. So I got that instead when we talked briefly, by the end of the night I was tired and I went to the second floor of the building to sit and rest for a bit, when I came back I was planning on trying to dance with her again but she had gone home. Also like I said I was a bit of a dumbass, first time doing this etc etc.

Its all good man. I'm horrible at names, but I remember details about peoples lives no problem. For what ever reason, interests/hobbies/majors stick much much more in my head than a name.

Just hit her up on FB, chat a little bit, and ask her out relatively soon. I was in a similar scenario the other week, and it worked out well. Hope the same happens for you!

 

[Ezalc]

Hm alright, I'll ask my cousin and some of his friends a good place to take her and then I'll send her a message tomorrow to get things rolling. I think I might ask her out for this saturday or would that be too short notice?

 

[Meus Renaissance]

I wouldn't use this, it has problems and isn't completely accurate. Just use the manual method.

Manual method?

 

[Miguel]

Yikes, I go away for 2 weeks (maybe 1, I lost track) and the thread... explodes as usual lol.

Long story short, ended things with this one girl after a handful of dates, cause I think I've discovered I'm not at a point at this moment where I need to be dating anyone. I can't seem to muster up the effort to want to really talk to anyone right now, I guess I may have tried to jump in too quickly after the last girl dumped me, plus some recent memories of a girl from last year have popped up lately and I suppose I just need to get past that, and get some other life stuff (better job/living situation) in order before I seriously get back into dating. It was a 12 months of on and off dating with some interesting girls, but time to go on the shelf for a few weeks/months and sort things out.

I'll continue reading and posting and pretending I have any good advice in here, lol. I've adjusted my OKC account accordingly, which I can only assume means I'll get bombarded with profile views/messages in the next week or two.

 

[mcrae]

Manual method?

sign into an account that isnt your own. type this in the url bar:

http://www.okcupid.com/match?filter...lter7=25,0000,10000&keywords=yourusernamehere

replace 'yourusernamehere' with your username. near the end, change the 0000 and 10,000 to narrow the range where you must be dtill you get your exact number. they say something about dividing by 2000 and adding 1, i didnt really understand that but yeah.

you can do this to search for people by attractiveness as well, the filter1=0,63 is what indicates 'anyone'. i think if you change it to 1,32 its girls looking for guys. in order to find out, just select your setting u want to change, change it, press search normally, see what numbers changed in the appropriate filter, copy, hit back button, paste into the url up top (leave keywords blank) and submit a new search

 

[Hylian7]

Manual method?

There was a Reddit link posted earlier where you can check the "Attractiveness" rating on OKC by using a specific URL and tacking on the account name on the end of it. You can do this with yourself by making an alternate account, logging in as that account, and using the URL, tacking your real account name to the end of that.

 

[Miguel]

Anyone wanna check mine? Got nothing when I tried that other page and I don't want to sign up for a fake account. (migm)

 

[mcrae]

Anyone wanna check mine? Got nothing when I tried that other page and I don't want to sign up for a fake account. (migm)

2767

 

[Desperado]

We have a date tomorrow to see a terrible 80s horror film. She seemed excited. Feels good man, even if it doesn't go anywhere.

Lol, she bailed...said she was really sorry but going to have to take a rain check because her "sister is really sick." I told her that it was too bad because we were going to have a lot of fun and asked her when the rain check was good for. She said whenever she's not busy. I responded, suggesting Thursday, but she didn't text back after that. Went to the movie with a friend instead. It was a lot of fun, would've been a great date.

How should I act the next time I see her..?

 

[Miguel]

2767

lol, thanks.

 

[Slayer-33]

This sounds fucking dumb I'm sorry. If she genuinely enjoys your company why not make it as long as she wants? What is this time limit shit. Do what feels natural and comfortable. Just cutting and running because you think dates should be under some arbitrary time limit is stupid. This is when people over think the process and fuck themselves over.

That's not overthinking it's a strategy. It specially applies to internet dates. Why are some of you getting so offended? I don't mean any harm lol

Look what she told him "roomates dog escaped and had to help get it back in"

When do you end a date at a restaurant that has been going for 2 hours and 30 minutes?

You end dates and you take the power, it keeps interest higher for a second longer date that doesn't have a time limit, a short first date allows you to remain more mysterious, doesn't make you look needy on any level. First dates are crazy checks and introductions. Keep it simple, you don't have to discuss every single topic.. Now if people get touchy feely/kissy then that's another story.

You are not ending it for the sake of ending it, there's a defined purpose.

If you don't like the advice then I'm sorry.

 

[Devolution]

That's not overthinking it's a strategy. It specially applies to internet dates. Why are some of you getting so offended? I don't mean any harm lol

Look what she told him "roomates dog escaped and had to help get it back in"

When do you end a date at a restaurant that has been going for 2 hours and 30 minutes?

You end dates and you take the power, it keeps interest higher for a second longer date that doesn't have a time limit, a short first date allows you to remain more mysterious, doesn't make you look needy on any level.

You are not ending it for the sake of ending it, there's a defined purpose.

If you don't like the advice then I'm sorry.

PUA shit if I ever saw it.

 

[Slayer-33]

PUA shit if I ever saw it.

Get over it.

As if it's horrible advice.

 

[Devolution]

Get over it.

As if it's horrible advice.

It is horrible advice but if someone wants to follow it by all means. Still going to call it as I see it.

 

[Slayer-33]

It is horrible advice but if someone wants to follow it by all means. Still going to call it as I see it.

Call what? You haven't said anything that can be considered constructive, get over yourself.

 

[Hylian7]

Uhhh, this kind of got lost in the shuffle, so I'll ask again:

Would it be weird if I attempted to set up a second date for Thursday?

My reason for doing this is because basically I would be stuck waiting two weeks to have another date with her (most likely). Our Spring Break is next week, the dorms close during that week here, so I have to go home (2.5 hours away) to my parents' house. She lives here, and in an apartment, and actually mentioned she'll be here all week next week. The only other way I see is to make arrangements to stay with a friend for all or part of the week, but I have to pull strings, and fast. Most of my friends are going out of town for Spring Break, so that may be an impossibility though.

 

[Pilgor]

While I agree that "her roommate's dog escaped and she had to go help get it back in" was a lame excuse to end the date, I don't think your 40 minute rule is a good idea at all. If the chemistry is good, there's no reason to end the date early.

She may have indicated somehow that she was ready for the date to end, and perhaps Hylian7 missed the cue, but I still think your 40 minute power move is kind of silly.

 

[mcrae]

Uhhh, this kind of got lost in the shuffle, so I'll ask again:

Would it be weird if I attempted to set up a second date for Thursday?

My reason for doing this is because basically I would be stuck waiting two weeks to have another date with her (most likely). Our Spring Break is next week, the dorms close during that week here, so I have to go home (2.5 hours away) to my parents' house. She lives here, and in an apartment, and actually mentioned she'll be here all week next week. The only other way I see is to make arrangements to stay with a friend for all or part of the week, but I have to pull strings, and fast. Most of my friends are going out of town for Spring Break, so that may be an impossibility though.

2nd date 7 days later? fuck, set it up for sunday to go study at her place and fuck her brains out

honest opinion: thurs is fine. and then again during spring break is fine, cause u have your student lodging to stay in anyways right? (personally i wouldnt do it if it was a 5hr round trip, but if i was staying the night at her place or mine, and had nothing to do anyways, why not)

 

[Joe]

Lol, she bailed...said she was really sorry but going to have to take a rain check because her "sister is really sick." I told her that it was too bad because we were going to have a lot of fun and asked her when the rain check was good for. She said whenever she's not busy. I responded, suggesting Thursday, but she didn't text back after that. Went to the movie with a friend instead. It was a lot of fun, would've been a great date.

How should I act the next time I see her..?

With a smile on your face. From this point forward pretend she's just a girl you're not attracted to. Don't bring it up and don't mention anything about dating with her again unless she brings it up. The ball is now in her court and it may stay there forever. That is just my opinion.

 

[Slayer-33]

While I agree that "her roommate's dog escaped and she had to go help get it back in" was a lame excuse to end the date, I don't think your 40 minute rule is a good idea at all. If the chemistry is good, there's no reason to end the date early.

She may have indicated somehow that she was ready for the date to end, and perhaps Hylian7 missed the cue, but I still think your 40 minute power move is kind of silly.

By the same token like Devo said , if she truly got a good impression/is genuinely interested she'd go on a 2nd more serious date..

All I was saying applies to first dates and specifically with people you meet over the dating sites.

I didn't mean to sound all calculating and shit, just for a first date that's all.

 

[Hylian7]

2nd date 7 days later? fuck, set it up for sunday to go study at her place and fuck her brains out

honest opinion: thurs is fine. and then again during spring break is fine, cause u have your student lodging to stay in anyways right? (personally i wouldnt do it if it was a 5hr round trip, but if i was staying the night at her place or mine, and had nothing to do anyways, why not)

2nd date is 2 days later, not 7, that's why this is a question in the first place. (I guess you missed the part where last Thursday didn't happen and it happened Tuesday instead.)

Also, I was trying to say that the dorms will be CLOSED during Spring Break, meaning I have no student lodging to go to during Spring Break.

 

[mcrae]

2nd date is 2 days later, not 7, that's why this is a question in the first place. (I guess you missed the part where last Thursday didn't happen and it happened Tuesday instead.)

Also, I was trying to say that the dorms will be CLOSED during Spring Break, meaning I have no student lodging to go to during Spring Break.

ooooook, so the date was tonight? ya, its hard to follow everyones individual stories

and one of you leaves on friday? its up in the air whether you should try to set anything up for thursday, depends on how you feel. i would imagine she wouldnt want to give up her evening cause everyone is going to be going out drinking/partying, ya? try to go to an area near where she will be and perhaps meet up at the bar to see her one last time. if i was to do that route i wouldnt do it much more than 3-4-5 hours in advance

 

[Mordeccai]

Thanks for the reply man. Guess it is better to perform and not finish, than to finish and not perform!



So a few of my buddies have told me.... I dunno. It was quite interesting. Willing to give it a shot. Really, really caught me off guard though. My back is destroyed with scratches.



Yeah, there is definitely no delusion here for me. The thing I'm worried about is actually her getting attached. The day after was no different, but today is a totally different story. I can tell she's been thinking about me (or the experience) more because her texts have been wayyy more overt.

Last night she was drunk and texted me quite a lot, which was alright, but they were definitely texts coming from a lady who is getting attached. I would write them here but they're literally two texts long each, huge paragraphs. Talking about how she first had a crush on me four years ago, how I'm so sweet to her and how she really likes my body and shit. Apparently my kisses give her butterflies.. So I guess I need to ask you all how you'd play this out? Her and I go to different universities in the same state, and I really, really don't have the emotional capacity right now to do anything long distance. We're on spring break now so we can hang out, but afterwards? I'm just not up for the task. The texts have continued on in the same fashion today, and she's not been drunk all day long haha, so it wasn't just drunk texting.

Should I lay everything out on the table next time we meet? Like tell her my view and what I'm comfortable with doing and what not? I've hurt the past few girls I've been with and I want to avoid doing that again.


Anddd for those of you calling me lucky... have any interesting things to try out in the sack? I'm open to suggestions haha. I'm sure she'd love the surprise as well.

Shameless bump. She texted me earlier and said "i miss you. i like you. im positive =p so positive" and I felt like such a dick! I told her she was too cute and dodged the statement. Am I making this a bigger deal than this has to be?

 

[mcrae]

Shameless bump. She texted me earlier and said "i miss you. i like you. im positive =p so positive" and I felt like such a dick! I told her she was too cute and dodged the statement. Am I making this a bigger deal than this has to be?

this is a friend turned f buddy right? and u wanna remain friends?

ya youre fucked, shes obviously taking it to heart and is real into you

 

[Krabardaf]

What the fuck.


Shouldn't be longer than 40 mins mang! lol

wat? All my first dates have generally been almost an afternoon long and all went great.
Didn't find a girl I'm really into yet though.

 

[Hylian7]

I went ahead and tried to set up the pool date for tomorrow. She will be out of town tomorrow night. She works in a town about an hour away on weekends, and usually leaves Thursday nights to go back there. I may have to figure out something during Spring Break, I really don't want to let that opportunity get away from me.

 

[Furio53]

I went ahead and tried to set up the pool date for tomorrow. She will be out of town tomorrow night. She works in a town about an hour away on weekends, and usually leaves Thursday nights to go back there. I may have to figure out something during Spring Break, I really don't want to let that opportunity get away from me.

relax. Don't get too worked up. I'm sure you're excited, just don't start giving off the needy/clingy vibe. If you have to wait til after spring break, it's not going to kill you. Just play it coo, let her know you want to go out again.

 

[Hylian7]

relax. Don't get too worked up. I'm sure you're excited, just don't start giving off the needy/clingy vibe. If you have to wait til after spring break, it's not going to kill you. Just play it coo, let her know you want to go out again.

That's what I figured, I thought it would be worth a try though.

I guess I'm just sort of paranoid that in this whole two weeks that I can't do anything with her, someone else will just swoop in. Is this paranoia rational? I don't know. I know you guys will tell me up and down not to have "oneitis", but I really like this girl, and don't want to let this opportunity get away from me. Does that make sense?

 

[SpectreFire]

Pretty much every girl I approach outside of online dating is taken, regardless of whether or not I'm interested in dating them. Does anyone else run into this as well?