Support NeoGAF

[Bam Bam Baklava]

So something interesting happened to me a few weeks ago... or at least it was interesting to me because it was something that i could never fathom happening to me and it sucks.

Me and my roommate were walking back from a party and a girl drove by that my roommate works with so she picks us up. Its her and one of her friends we never met before in the front and us in the back.

So were chillin, just talking and shit until we pull up to our house. I get out, go in and start making some food. My roommate comes in like 10 mins later and he says something like "yo thats girl thought i was hot so she gave me her number and she wants to fuck soon."

Now... not that i'd likely go for a chick that did some shit like that... but i could never in my wildest dreams imagine a chick coming at me like that. But for him its a pretty regular occurrence. And it just made me feel really shitty and undesirable.

But whatever... Its not like thats a new feeling these days. Now that im 21 and hit the bars up its just gotten worse because i usually get shot down off appearances before i can even get a word out. So I just kinda accept that getting chicks is an uphill battle compared to the people i hang out with.

I dunno. I try to stay upbeat about it but I feel like its the world's way of telling me that im aiming too high or something.
Or maybe im just thinking too much at 3am.

I know where you're coming from but maybe you just need to be more assertive.

 

[SMT]

So something interesting happened to me a few weeks ago... or at least it was interesting to me because it was something that i could never fathom happening to me and it sucks.

Me and my roommate were walking back from a party and a girl drove by that my roommate works with so she picks us up. Its her and one of her friends we never met before in the front and us in the back.

So were chillin, just talking and shit until we pull up to our house. I get out, go in and start making some food. My roommate comes in like 10 mins later and he says something like "yo thats girl thought i was hot so she gave me her number and she wants to fuck soon."

Now... not that i'd likely go for a chick that did some shit like that... but i could never in my wildest dreams imagine a chick coming at me like that. But for him its a pretty regular occurrence. And it just made me feel really shitty and undesirable.

But whatever... Its not like thats a new feeling these days. Now that im 21 and hit the bars up its just gotten worse because i usually get shot down off appearances before i can even get a word out. So I just kinda accept that getting chicks is an uphill battle compared to the people i hang out with.

I dunno. I try to stay upbeat about it but I feel like its the world's way of telling me that im aiming too high or something.
Or maybe im just thinking too much at 3am.

Keep approaching them, you learn from your attempts, it is nearing 4 am, maybe I'm getting a bit too supportive.

 

[DominoKid]

I know where you're coming from but maybe you just need to be more assertive.

Its not for lack of effort or assertiveness. I try plenty even though i get rejected so much that it doesnt even feel like its worth it.

For whatever reason i just suck at looking awesome enough that girls want me. I think I look good. But i get the screwface so much when i approach a girl that apparently i dont.

I just want my senior year to be awesome and if this keeps up (seems like it will *kanyeshrug*) its gonna suck so much.

 

[Dr_Boris_Goltz]

My girlfriend just left me... I'm devastated.

I have never felt like this in my entire existence. She says she still loves me but we aren't working out... I don't feel the same way. I feel like we had a lot of time left with each other even if it would fizzle out in the long run.

There is nothing I can say to make her try again. How can she love me if she's so willing to end it?

Edit: Prior to meeting her I went through a massive transformation... I basically went from suicidal to having a new lease on life.

I'm not trying to sound emo but I feel that darkness creeping its way back into me at this moment and I don't want to fight it.

 

[Log4Girlz]

My girlfriend just left me... I'm devastated.

I have never felt like this in my entire existence. She says she still loves me but we aren't working out... I don't feel the same way. I feel like we had a lot of time left with each other even if it would fizzle out in the long run.

There is nothing I can say to make her try again. How can she love me if she's so willing to end it?

Edit: Prior to meeting her I went through a massive transformation... I basically went from suicidal to having a new lease on life.

I'm not trying to sound emo but I feel that darkness creeping its way back into me at this moment and I don't want to fight it.

You had a gf, you can have another. Focus on meeting some new girl

 

[Dr_Boris_Goltz]

You had a gf, you can have another. Focus on meeting some new girl

It's going to be tough... She was my first at age 25, but at least I have that stigma gone.

I'm just so inclined to say fuck everything and fall into a pit. I've always had this self-destructive nature in me and it comes out when things get really bad. I was hoping it wouldn't this time.

It doesn't help that I still feel really strongly for her... It wasn't going to work in the very long term because she wanted a family and I don't want my gene pool to continue (I know that sounds depressing but we have a lot of mental disorders and addiction... I actually got lucky).

Still this is much harder than I ever thought it would be. I'm sorry if I sound super emo, but GAF is really my only support group right now.

 

[ZombieFred]

My girlfriend just left me... I'm devastated.

I have never felt like this in my entire existence. She says she still loves me but we aren't working out... I don't feel the same way. I feel like we had a lot of time left with each other even if it would fizzle out in the long run.

There is nothing I can say to make her try again. How can she love me if she's so willing to end it?

Edit: Prior to meeting her I went through a massive transformation... I basically went from suicidal to having a new lease on life.

I'm not trying to sound emo but I feel that darkness creeping its way back into me at this moment and I don't want to fight it.

It's quite normal to feel like you want to go into self destruction mode so you can try avoid accepting reality in some ways and try to feel better in a sadistic way because of the emotional strain you might be going through.

I bet you're still young and feel like you will not find someone again that you felt very close to. You will and you will even find someone better for your life, even if you don't believe it will happen right now, there's so much insane time left for you to encounter the right one. What I'd reccomend is to reflect on yourself on things you like to do that would make you feel better about yourself and stronger and focus on that for a while so you become more content again and then let things set sail on the future.


----------------------------
Well my luck recently has just been twisted and on the girls I've dated and come across, I've not found any that seem to fit both sides that I would like. Would you say it's acceptable for me to want someone who's just as attractive as well intilligence and character that matches my own so I found the ideal partner? I only seem to find one or the other at the moment and it just doesn't rub me well and I don't wish to sound like a dick or anything thinking other wise considering I want to find that perfect one after coming out of a long relationship of five years (I am only 22 though).

 

[Dr_Boris_Goltz]

Being 26 now I don't feel as young as I would like. I feel like a lot of women at this age are considering who they want to be with for the far future.

Not wanting a family is going to make things very difficult for me going forward.

 

[ZombieFred]

Being 26 now I don't feel as young as I would like. I feel like a lot of women at this age are considering who they want to be with for the far future.

Not wanting a family is going to make things very difficult for me going forward.

Not at all, there's a lot of women out there that don't want any kids or having a family and be much happier with spending more time with a partner exploring the world and having fun together. You might think the clock is ticking son but you're only 26 with so many years ahead of you. You not wanting a family to be honest has actually extended you having a higher chance on finding someone your age or women in their 30s more than ones who would like to. It's a huge ocean man.

 

[AHA-Lambda]

Gaf, need some help again =/

I was going to go to a friend's 21st party this Friday but I know my ex will be there. I felt ok with it at first but the closer I got to it the more nervous and apprehensious I got about it. Then one of my friends tells me it is not a good idea for me to go because apparently she wants some space and the birthday girl in question also doesn't want any drama between us either.

So now I feel like I've been kicked out of that, plus I feel really kind of ticked off she is saying she needs space from me when she was the one who dumped me but still wanted to be friends. Yeah, I'm kinda pissed off and it's eating at me.

I feel like my social circle is contracting and I need to meet more people now, shit is getting depressing.

 

[ZombieFred]

Gaf, need some help again =/

I was going to go to a friend's 21st party this Friday but I know my ex will be there. I felt ok with it at first but the closer I got to it the more nervous and apprehensious I got about it. Then one of my friends tells me it is not a good idea for me to go because apparently she wants some space and the birthday girl in question also doesn't want any drama between us either.

So now I feel like I've been kicked out of that, plus I feel really kind of ticked off she is saying she needs space from me when she was the one who dumped me but still wanted to be friends. Yeah, I'm kinda pissed off and it's eating at me.

I feel like my social circle is contracting and I need to meet more people now, shit is getting depressing.

I say you should go. Don't let your ex try to stop you from having a good time. It's a party with loads of people and you're adults now, you can both just be polite and ignore each other/let the others keep to their business. You are there for your friends' birthday, go there and have a good time. Don't let her try to remove you from your friend social circle and they will be there for you if they are good friends.

 

[Xun]

Went out tonight to a friends gig and I sadly felt invisible the whole evening.

I tried to speak to people, but my anxiety had rendered myself speechless.

At least you went out and did it man. No need to be so hard on yourself. Name one positive thing you took from it.

I actually can't take anything positive from last night at all. I tried to speak to some of the girls who played, but I almost felt ignored so I didn't say anything.

I feel physically drained from it all, to the extent where I feel like an old man (I'm 22). I've not enjoyed myself in life yet, and it feels like the time of "living my youth" is something that will never happen.

It's a pain that after these 3 thread iterations I'm not really getting any better.

Edit:

Please just get drunk, learn your limits so you don't get to the point of slurring or stumbling. Once drunk approach every girl in the area and say hello, go from there. I'm sorry but you have to get wasted to get over your fears.

I certainly feel better getting drunk, but even then I struggle.

 

[ZombieFred]

Just get drunk Xun and go out there. It's only you stopping yourself from here now, with all the advice and us trying to motivate and push you forward. Only thing left to do so don't fall into that silly repeated pattern where you are stuck into depression mode.

 

[AHA-Lambda]

I say you should go. Don't let your ex try to stop you from having a good time. It's a party with loads of people and you're adults now, you can both just be polite and ignore each other/let the others keep to their business. You are there for your friends' birthday, go there and have a good time. Don't let her try to remove you from your friend social circle and they will be there for you if they are good friends.

Nah I don't really want to go anyway, the party is really going to be filled with people who admittedly are mutual friends but closer to my ex than me. I also cannot promise myself that I wouldn't make some sort of drunken scene, so I think it is a better idea not to go.

I'm just annoyed at the reaction of some people there as if I am not wanted though; especially my ex. I feel that you just can't use the excuse that you need some space when you where the one who dumped me but still said we could be friends

 

[Jo Shishido's Cheeks]

Holy shit. That was so painful to read.

I know, I feel like an idiot

Dude.... dude

Couple things about this.

Don't go crazy about it, (I think every guy has at least one of those moments) and the one good thing that will come out of this experience is; the feeling you have right now, right this second. Save it, store it, and remember it so you don't fuck up something so blatantly obvious again.

Thanks for the advice! I've never been good at reading signs/signals but never to this extent. I didn't want to go out that night and so whilst out I was never really got into the swing of things so I think that contributed, but other than that I have no excuses.
How do you personally differentiate somebody being nice/friendly and being interested in you?

 

[ZombieFred]

Nah I don't really want to go anyway, the party is really going to be filled with people who admittedly are mutual friends but closer to my ex than me. I also cannot promise myself that I wouldn't make some sort of drunken scene, so I think it is a better idea not to go.

I'm just annoyed at the reaction of some people there as if I am not wanted though; especially my ex. I feel that you just can't use the excuse that you need some space when you where the one who dumped me but still said we could be friends

Oh if that's the case then you might as well avoid it and just be with the friends that matter and count. There's plenty of other women and parties for you to enjoy with and you can rise above those petty feelings and be better than her/him if they are trying to make you look bad. You'll be fine son.

 

[AHA-Lambda]

Oh if that's the case then you might as well avoid it and just be with the friends that matter and count. There's plenty of other women and parties for you to enjoy with and you can rise above those petty feelings and be better than her/him if they are trying to make you look bad. You'll be fine son.

Thanks man, it's strange to know that gaf can be such a comfort in a way :lol

 

[ZombieFred]

Thanks man, it's strange to know that gaf can be such a comfort in a way :lol

Well it's nice to know that threads like these has guys that've been in those (or are/will) situations and got experiance to help people with similar interests and so fourth. I've been through some hell ages ago and a lot better now because of such advice and help. I still hate the fact i've not found the ideal women for me yet though but I know there's plenty of time as I am only 22, kept in shape and go out often. It's a matter of time and patience but it's best you don't look for it and enjoy having some time to yourself improving on your own life in areas you know that have flaws in. It's the best thing about coming out of a serious relationship or experiencing such things, it makes you more active and want to live life more!

 

[DY_nasty]

Oh, just to get this out there. I would never lay a hand on a girl.

A guy on the other hand... let's just say I've had some bad thoughts towards certain individuals.

lol

u aint about that life cuz

 

[Sanky Panky]

Being 26 now I don't feel as young as I would like. I feel like a lot of women at this age are considering who they want to be with for the far future.

Not wanting a family is going to make things very difficult for me going forward.

26 to 28 is prime age to attract the 21-23 year old girls. They usually are not thinking too much about settling down.

You should feel good about yourself that you overcame so much, and that you are capable of loving. Now it is time to explore all the different fun personalities out there, and do things for yourself. Don't focus on replacing you now ex. Pick and chose what you liked and didn't like about her, and have fun evaluating other matches.

 

[Klyka]

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

 

[Darren870]

I actually can't take anything positive from last night at all. I tried to speak to some of the girls who played, but I almost felt ignored so I didn't say anything.

I feel physically drained from it all, to the extent where I feel like an old man (I'm 22). I've not enjoyed myself in life yet, and it feels like the time of "living my youth" is something that will never happen.

It's a pain that after these 3 thread iterations I'm not really getting any better.

Edit:

I certainly feel better getting drunk, but even then I struggle.

Cheer up man! My uni life sucked also. I am 27 now and have been having more fun in the past 4 years then I did in my 4 years at uni. I was the same, never branched out, kept to myself, played games and told people I was too busy. I also worked 40 hours a week so that didn't help either.

Plus you go a job coming up too. Great way to meet people and branch out a bit.

 

[SlipperySlope]

I need to call Robin... Don't even know if I can make it to Sunday. It's all I think about.

 

[Darren870]

I need to call Robin... Don't even know if I can make it to Sunday. It's all I think about.

Mate....you are on a Slippery Slope (had to) do not call her. You two clearly didn't see eye to eye on the relationship you were having.

 

[RedNalgene]

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

Totally true. It's confidence, plain and simple. You're carrying yourself differently, walking with your head held high, making eye contact, smiling. Confidence is attractive.

 

[gazele]

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

Yep yep, so true, it's really bizarre, it's like where we're you a few months ago? (or whenever the relationship started)

 

[Minamu]

I need to call Robin... Don't even know if I can make it to Sunday. It's all I think about.

if you do that, you don't deserve our advice, honestly. You're too emotionally invested in someone you barely know, you have basically said it yourself that you are not fit to be in a relationship right now, a few months can barely be called that to begin with AND she broke up with you. Harsh words, sorry, but it's true. Forget this girl.

 

[scotcheggz]

Being 26 now I don't feel as young as I would like. I feel like a lot of women at this age are considering who they want to be with for the far future.

Not wanting a family is going to make things very difficult for me going forward.

I don't post in here that often, but lurk a bit, I broke up with my girlfriend of four years when I was 29, now I'm 30 I thought similar to what you're thinking now. I just wanted to say that you and I are/were wrong to think like that. You'll be alright man.

 

[Omegasquash]

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

Truth, and I remember the feeling from when the script flipped. Keep that in mind and you'll be able to approach women MUCH easier for future good times.

 

[DY_nasty]

I need to call Robin... Don't even know if I can make it to Sunday. It's all I think about.

This is exactly why she went with the letyoudowneasy stuff when she dumped you. You're a fucking mess.

 

[Chinner]

SlipperySlope:

1. how old are you
2. is this your first relationship
3. when you two first hooked up did you spend all your time with each other

 

[LosDaddie]

Being 26 now I don't feel as young as I would like. I feel like a lot of women at this age are considering who they want to be with for the far future.

Not wanting a family is going to make things very difficult for me going forward.

From my experience, the mid-to-late 20s are when ladies do start (if they haven't already been) looking for their husband, and to start a family. Maybe not make babies right away, but definitely find a husband to do such with.

But like others have said, at 26yo, you still have plenty of time left. Don't worry.

 

[True Underdog]

I need to call Robin... Don't even know if I can make it to Sunday. It's all I think about.

Dude. Scorched earth. No contact.

 

[SlipperySlope]

SlipperySlope:

1. how old are you
2. is this your first relationship
3. when you two first hooked up did you spend all your time with each other

1. 31
2. No
3. No, the distance means we could only hang out on weekends.

 

[DY_nasty]

1. 31
2. No
3. No, the distance means we could only hang out on weekends.

Dude

You got bigger issues than how to get a date. Not trying to beat you up but I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything and tell you that it'll be okay when you get over it. Get your head straight. No one is going to fix you but you.

 

[AHA-Lambda]

Well it's nice to know that threads like these has guys that've been in those (or are/will) situations and got experiance to help people with similar interests and so fourth. I've been through some hell ages ago and a lot better now because of such advice and help. I still hate the fact i've not found the ideal women for me yet though but I know there's plenty of time as I am only 22, kept in shape and go out often. It's a matter of time and patience but it's best you don't look for it and enjoy having some time to yourself improving on your own life in areas you know that have flaws in. It's the best thing about coming out of a serious relationship or experiencing such things, it makes you more active and want to live life more!

Yeah you're right and I certainly am trying to do more things now too and see other people I haven't seen in a long time. Like I said I feel like my social circle has contracted alot with my recently leaving uni and many of my friends are away on placements elsewhere along with my break up so I need to compensate for all that of course.

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

Oh God THIS!

 

[Tex117]

I think a lot of times the girl doesn't really know. I've talked to different girls about me, about their friends, about their boyfriends. I haven't ever received a clear 'man-answer' from any woman ever about any person-issue. They don't think like that, period. Or if they do I've never met one that does.

Furthermore, guys usually just think they know how they feel about things and why, but they usually don't either. Just guys get into the whole 'I know' where girls are more 'I think' or 'I feel'. It helps if you question yourself and your logic, you might learn something about what you really want. I've learned a lot but I know there's a lot more about myself I don't know.

Of course that is some good introspective advice.

I have had a "man" answer from a women and I have the utmost respect for her.

Its just frustrating, but nonetheless, the best thing whenever you get the Dear John letter or conversation, is to cut all contact.

That much is clear and easy.

 

[Out of Working Order]

I feel physically drained from it all, to the extent where I feel like an old man (I'm 22). I've not enjoyed myself in life yet, and it feels like the time of "living my youth" is something that will never happen.

It's a pain that after these 3 thread iterations I'm not really getting any better.

I feel exactly the same. Everyone else seems to be having the time of their lives.

Perhaps if I really tryed I might get somewhere. I've never really put much effort into it, though. I don't have the commitment or enthusiasm for it - especially when I am likely to face rejection repeatedly. I mustered the courage to talk and smile to a new staff member at work a few months ago, and I got the impression she found me to be an inconvenience. A few weeks later she left; obviously she was just intending to work there a short while. Maybe she already had a partner, and that's why she sort of brushed me off. I just really lack the energy to put too much thought or effort into it.

My advice to you Xun, would be to keep at it and don't give up. You're already out there trying, and I imagine it's only going to become easier for you, and your confidence will steadily grow. After a while, it probably won't even feel like you're trying anymore, and mingling will all become second nature.

 

[Tex117]

SLIPPERY SLOPE

FOR THE LOVE OF GAWD DON'T DO IT.

Think of that relationship like an addiction. You have to break the addicition. If you go dabble you will be right back in the beginning.

No Contact.

 

[Tex117]

My girlfriend just left me... I'm devastated.

I have never felt like this in my entire existence. She says she still loves me but we aren't working out... I don't feel the same way. I feel like we had a lot of time left with each other even if it would fizzle out in the long run.

There is nothing I can say to make her try again. How can she love me if she's so willing to end it?

Edit: Prior to meeting her I went through a massive transformation... I basically went from suicidal to having a new lease on life.

I'm not trying to sound emo but I feel that darkness creeping its way back into me at this moment and I don't want to fight it.

Dude, you may need to go seek some real help here. Gaf has gotten a bit too serious recently.

And yes, you are being dramatic.

Take the rest of the week. Wallow....whine...Let the days be only black and white, but come Sunday, dust yourself off, and go fix it.

 

[Darren870]

1. 31
2. No
3. No, the distance means we could only hang out on weekends.

Were you two actually dating? Like exclusively? or did you just go on a few dates?

 

[Dr_Boris_Goltz]

I really want to thank you guys for the encouragement.

I'm feeling slightly better today but I know when she takes me off her Facebook profile I'm going to feel everything all over again.

I never wanted to become one of her many ex-boyfriend-turned-friends.

Thinking about it more there were issues that didn't fall under the "family in the near future" category. Specifically I need to be around somebody who is completely sober in order to feel comfortable.

Finding somebody who doesn't socially drink and doesn't want children is going to be extremely difficult, and that worries me.

 

[Tex117]

I really want to thank you guys for the encouragement.

I'm feeling slightly better today but I know when she takes me off her Facebook profile I'm going to feel everything all over again.

I never wanted to become one of her many ex-boyfriend-turned-friends.

Thinking about it more there were issues that didn't fall under the "family in the near future" category. Specifically I need to be around somebody who is completely sober in order to feel comfortable.

Finding somebody who doesn't socially drink and doesn't want children is going to be extremely difficult, and that worries me.

Graffgor, why not be proactive? De-friend her from facebook. It will be tough, but you will take some ownership in the break. You will feel stronger for doign so.

And dont be her friend either. To hell with that. De-friend her. Un-twitter or whatever. Be strong and you will be rewarded for doing so. Not today, not tomorrow, but in a few weeks you will be in much better shape. I promise you.

Be tough.

 

[Omegasquash]

Gaf has gotten a bit too serious recently.

Agreed. This thread has attracted some pretty bad situations, and that's not the intent. There are other threads out there for these specific cases, I feel like. People here are happy to help with confidence and snagging a date, but we're not qualified to counsel or anything like that.

 

[Dr_Boris_Goltz]

Graffgor, why not be proactive? De-friend her from facebook. It will be tough, but you will take some ownership in the break. You will feel stronger for doign so.

And dont be her friend either. To hell with that. De-friend her. Un-twitter or whatever. Be strong and you will be rewarded for doing so. Not today, not tomorrow, but in a few weeks you will be in much better shape. I promise you.

Be tough.

I did it. I spoke with her this morning and I started to get a sense of cruelty in her that I didn't see before. She seems so okay with crushing my heart like this.

Edit: I take that back.. there's no cruelty there. I'm starting to believe we weren't compatible and that she's right about this.

 

[SlipperySlope]

Were you two actually dating? Like exclusively? or did you just go on a few dates?

We were together two months.

 

[Nerds with Guns]

You know what's really funny?
The age old cliché of "now that you have a girlfriend, suddenly every girl wants you" really is true. You have to experience it for yourself. Girls that would never even look at your general direction suddenly smile at you, make eye contact, you get into conversations with them all of a sudden. It's pretty crazy to experience.

Yup, it’s because the amount of fucks you give is at an all time low.

The best thing though is that now YOU are the one who pulls the "sorry, I already have a partner" card MUHAHAHAHAA

lol

Thanks for the advice! I've never been good at reading signs/signals but never to this extent. I didn't want to go out that night and so whilst out I was never really got into the swing of things so I think that contributed, but other than that I have no excuses.
How do you personally differentiate somebody being nice/friendly and being interested in you?

Personally?

As far as a girl being nice (for me) she’ll keep things around a small talk level. That simple. Now if she’s interested that’s a different story. The things I look for from the beginning are body language and eye contact. The first one is easy; if she’s completely facing you, you have her full attention. If she’s really relaxed while facing you even better. The second one can be misinterpreted easily. A girl can look at you, and then she can look at you. This one’s a little harder to describe so I apologize if that doesn’t really make sense. Other things I look for are; is she’s laughing a lot, is she’s playful, and does she restart the conversation when it dies.

Well. Going to give it a shot tomorrow. I'd be elated if she said yes, but I've come to rely on myself for happiness at this point.

Good.

Now that im 21 and hit the bars up its just gotten worse because i usually get shot down off appearances before i can even get a word out.

I’m going to ask you like I asked Midnights. Do you like going to bars and clubs or do you go just because your friends do and you want to meet women?

but i could never in my wildest dreams imagine a chick coming at me like that.

I try to stay upbeat about it but I feel like its the world's way of telling me that im aiming too high or something.

For whatever reason i just suck at looking awesome enough that girls want me.

Get this out your fucking head.

 

[SlipperySlope]

I'm sorry that I have to ignore the advise in this thread. I really have to make the call. It's one of those situations where I would regret it later if I didn't, as weird as that sounds. I already have what I'm going to say written (won't read it word for word, it's mostly for guidelines and so I don't forget something, and it's only like 4 sentences long.)

I hate being alone. Really hate it. It's a big part of the reason I am the way I am. I've been alone all my life. And I'll do whatever is reasonable to fix it.

I'll wait as long as I can before making the call, but I can't see myself being able to hold it past Sunday...

 

[Darren870]

I'm sorry that I have to ignore the advise in this thread. I really have to make the call. It's one of those situations where I would regret it later if I didn't, as weird as that sounds. I already have what I'm going to say written (won't read it word for word, it's mostly for guidelines and so I don't forget something, and it's only like 4 sentences long.)

I hate being alone. Really hate it. It's a big part of the reason I am the way I am. I've been alone all my life. And I'll do whatever is reasonable to fix it.

I'll wait as long as I can before making the call, but I can't see myself being able to hold it past Sunday...

Why dont you tell us what you wrote down? Also what is the significance of Sunday?

 

[NeOak]

I'm sorry that I have to ignore the advise in this thread. I really have to make the call. It's one of those situations where I would regret it later if I didn't, as weird as that sounds. I already have what I'm going to say written (won't read it word for word, it's mostly for guidelines and so I don't forget something, and it's only like 4 sentences long.)

I hate being alone. Really hate it. It's a big part of the reason I am the way I am. I've been alone all my life. And I'll do whatever is reasonable to fix it.

I'll wait as long as I can before making the call, but I can't see myself being able to hold it past Sunday...

Do the call if you want, but it's your funeral.