it all boils down to - do you enjoy being with her and being a legit friend, or will you always be hoping for something more? it's perfectly fine to say "lookit our friendship will probably suffer because I'm hung up on you, and I can't handle that or trust that I won't do some douchey shit if I see you with some other dude" and be real about that. lay it all out on the table but before doing so, figure out for real what you're in it for and don't lie to yourself. maybe you could handle it. maybe you can't. maybe you think you can wear her down (note: that is not a reliable method for getting a girl) but don't be a slave to her happiness with others and let it dictate how you feel. if you wanna move on, move on, but figure out what you truly want out of someone before you lay it all out there.
-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Dating-Age |OT4| Realise You're Living in the Golden Years
- Thread starter Minamu
- Start date
- Status
it all boils down to - do you enjoy being with her and being a legit friend, or will you always be hoping for something more? it's perfectly fine to say "lookit our friendship will probably suffer because I'm hung up on you, and I can't handle that or trust that I won't do some douchey shit if I see you with some other dude" and be real about that. lay it all out on the table but before doing so, figure out for real what you're in it for and don't lie to yourself. maybe you could handle it. maybe you can't. maybe you think you can wear her down (note: that is not a reliable method for getting a girl) but don't be a slave to her happiness with others and let it dictate how you feel. if you wanna move on, move on, but figure out what you truly want out of someone before you lay it all out there.
The weird thing is we called them dates, when we went out. But I think the whole time she just thought we were just hanging out.
NeOak
Member
I had to learn this on my own. I'm putting distance between my friend and I because well, I don't think I would take well knowing she started dating some other dude.
I would like more than a friendship with her but I've fucked up so bad I don't think its ever going to happen. We're good friends but, I don't know. I just don't feel like reaching out to her to be honest. I'd rather do my own thing and just answer in the rare times she reaches out to me since she is quite introverted.
Edit: Another reason for the distance is that she is usually "busy" now. That "busy" is hanging out with a different group of friends. That's her right and all, but I felt a but neglected and even jealous, so I did blow up about it. Meh.
She doesn't want me to stop contact but I just got tired of asking "let's do X" or "got time to talk?" and getting 95% of the time a "no, busy" or "talking with others". Sure, She said that I could have texted/written on Skype but I asked to talk damn it, otherwise I would have just written it from the start. And best thing is that she wants me to keep asking to do stuff with her since i don't ask anymore. No shit. Why would I if I'm sure I'll get a "busy" anyway?
brb blocking and deleting her.
stn
Member
I reallllllly think women who like certain guys will make efforts to reach out to them no matter what. The few posts above got me thinking to how girls who liked me in the past have treated me, and I realized they all made efforts to reach out to me. It could be a random text, a direct invite out, or even something completely random.
If a girl likes you she WILL find any reason to keep in touch with you. In fact, I'm going to run an experiment to see what happens: any girl I go out with next I'll refrain from contacting after the first date/meetup. Granted, there may be the odd girl who doesn't actually like me and just messages because she's insecure about the fact that I'm not messaging. I'll see for myself how many of them take any kind of initiative.
I usually give a 1-2 week grace period before I totally move on. I will send a clear message and make my intentions obvious. No reply? I move. Women are smart and resourceful, they have the capability to message if they want. And nobody is too busy to send one message, I don't buy that shit. The busiest people in my life still have time to party, Facebook, and all that other crap.
If a girl likes you she WILL find any reason to keep in touch with you. In fact, I'm going to run an experiment to see what happens: any girl I go out with next I'll refrain from contacting after the first date/meetup. Granted, there may be the odd girl who doesn't actually like me and just messages because she's insecure about the fact that I'm not messaging. I'll see for myself how many of them take any kind of initiative.
I usually give a 1-2 week grace period before I totally move on. I will send a clear message and make my intentions obvious. No reply? I move. Women are smart and resourceful, they have the capability to message if they want. And nobody is too busy to send one message, I don't buy that shit. The busiest people in my life still have time to party, Facebook, and all that other crap.
HER: So you want to hangout sometime?
ME: yes, when?
HER: I am free tonight if you are
ME: (internally)
Going to play it cool but I am pretty pumped.
I don't k know if this is a good thing , being so easily forgetful.
I find it so easy to fall into an infatuation with a female, but I find it even easier to completely fall out of that.
A roller coaster of emotion basically.
Always starts the same. Meet girl, like girl, meet girl for real, get infatuated and fantasize about a whole life together, hang out with girl, find an imperfection, fall out of feelings and never care for her again.
There was a girl I was talking about a couple weeks ago in here, and I don't even think about her the same way anymore.
I wanted so much from her, and now that's gone. And I don't care.
Maybe it's Cus I secretly want that wifey material. But I'm too young for that shit.
Da struggle
I find it so easy to fall into an infatuation with a female, but I find it even easier to completely fall out of that.
A roller coaster of emotion basically.
Always starts the same. Meet girl, like girl, meet girl for real, get infatuated and fantasize about a whole life together, hang out with girl, find an imperfection, fall out of feelings and never care for her again.
There was a girl I was talking about a couple weeks ago in here, and I don't even think about her the same way anymore.
I wanted so much from her, and now that's gone. And I don't care.
Maybe it's Cus I secretly want that wifey material. But I'm too young for that shit.
Da struggle
NeOak
Member
Yes, I've seen this before too. They would use the lamest excuse to talk to you. Like, really lame lol. My ex did this a lot lmao.
My friend is super introverted. The way she works is that if you poke her, say anything ir just hi, she will open up and write back. (In my case at least, seems most just get one liners)
You can have her on Skype and fb, g+, steam, xfire, etc. But the one thing she doesn't give to anyone is her cellphone number. I have it. If I text I'll get an almost instant reply too.
Recently, a girl who was a friend of mine decided to cut me off to pursue another guy because I would be a threat just being around (the guy doesn't like me, Idc tbh) and so i poked my friend to come and talk with me and another friend of ours. The conversation later moved on to:
- The girl who cut me off considered my friend a threat to any possible relationship we could have, her reasoning is that we "care" about each other too much and even though the friendship has had really messed up moments, we still are there. My friend, she says there is nothing that would give the vibe that we are more than friends and that she doesn't understand why she is considered a threat.
- I mentioned the situation and that I don't feel like reaching out to her. Her response is that she has noticed, she has reached out (in really stupid ways I might add, but in her case, its an achievement to do so)
- When I said that had this not happened, I wouldn't have reached out to her for a month at least, her answer was that she would have reached out, and even *gasp* called me to my cellphone. (She is phone shy. I've heard her talk on her cellphone while we talk on Skype and its true)
- She stressed out that there would be stuff she would help me with if I asked. That it was ok to ask her as much as I wanted. Sure, she might be busy but that I should ask anyway.
All in all, a girl who doesn't want to lose me as a friend. But nothing more that just a friendship. The 3rd person in the conversation stressed out that I should really value her friendship and I do. Otherwise I would have stopped talking to her months ago.
I'm just sure that there won't be anything else than friendship and that since I'm super busy in the week (yes stn I know), I just don't reach out. No point since we don't really share anything at this point. She's single and she knows I like her anyway, but if she doesn't see me that way (she did shot me down. Twice), there isn't anything I can do except move on.
I know it may sound selfish and all, but I'd rather have it like this than being het friend just to try to get more out of it.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
All of you that unironically use the term friend zone deserve to be single.
Just get rid of it. If she DOES happen to message you, just tell her like it is.
DELEEEEEEETE
Mortimer Brewster
Member
Just get rid of it. If she DOES happen to message you, just tell her like it is.
DELEEEEEEETE
Well I deleted all of our text messages back and forth so unless I go digging in my rather large contact list, she's not visible on my phone. She's rarely on Facebook and hasn't been on POF since we started dating so I'm going to leave those be unless they become a problem for me. I guess I'm opting to bury things at the moment.
Okay, but if you feel the need to look for her contact info, then delete it aaaaaall
Go_Ly_Dow
Member
well the girl it never worked out with who I've been in love with since February just hooked up with another guy. it was only yesterday she invited me round and cooked me dinner.
it hurts right now, but now I can properly attempt at moving on. i have no intention of being one of those hovering male "friends" waiting for their chance.
damn myself for holding on for so long.
it hurts right now, but now I can properly attempt at moving on. i have no intention of being one of those hovering male "friends" waiting for their chance.
damn myself for holding on for so long.
Mortimer Brewster
Member
Okay, but if you feel the need to look for her contact info, then delete it aaaaaall
I will and if seeing her on Facebook or something causes problems I will delete that as well.
Good. Purge.
Haha, I held onto that guy for waaaaaay too long and it was stupid.
It's called being an orbiter, because you circle around her like a satellite. And yeah, don't be that guy. Sucks to hear that you're hurting of course. It gets better with time and new people.
I tried exchanging number with a 19 year old tonight. But it turns out she has a hidden number so I have zero chance of reaching out to her xD Liberating actually. She did mention that her father worked at a prison nearby so that could be why. Anywho, let's see if she can find my name in her phone book
Go_Ly_Dow
Member
i hear ya.
today she called me because she was upset over something and yesterday she asked me to call to wake her up because she frequently sleeps through alarm clocks and misses classes.
not my problem anymore. hope her new BF has fun because she's tested my patience to the absolute limit with some of her problems.
time to be a free man, continue hitting the gym and one day score myself with a keeper.
Seeing some other posts about taking breaks, I cant help but feel the same way. Been thinking about this for a little while now.
I think Ive been trying too hard (the fact that I even consider this work is probably a big problem). I was trying to avoid the why cant I find someone, even though I just sit at home and do nothing all the time issue. Hence signing up for multiple dating sites, being more active (i.e., messaging girls even if they DO believe in ghosts, or something silly like that), joining lots of meetup groups, joining a gym, going out more (at least for things Im comfortable with), and even trying out things like Speed Dating. Ive had some fun with a lot of that (primarily meetup groups), and certainly met some cool people, but definitely havent come close to starting any kind of relationships with anyone. I end up putting in way too much time and putting a lot of pressure on myself I think, which just bums me out a bit when the results arent paying off. I think it might just be a good idea to quit worrying about that all for a while, and focus on myself a bit.
I think Ill be closing all my online profiles except for OKCupid. Thats the only site that Ive actually enjoyed. Not a lot (it seems primarily married women and GAFers like my profile, but not so much the single ladies), but I would like to keep it open if only just to find some new friends/penpals. The others havent resulted in anything positive, and I dont really feel the need to waste anymore time/money on them. Even with OKC, Ill probably only check it if I receive any messages.
I think I might have felt the need to "find someone" a few months ago (or at least I didnt want to shut the door on finding someone), but at this point, Im not sure I really care anymore (it would be nice, but I dont think it is priority #1 anymore). Ive recently started having some new life/career aspirations, so I might try pursuing that for a bit. Or at least sculpting those ideas out some...theyre still pretty raw/amorphous at this point. Better that than checking out TInder every few hours.
Not sure what the point is in sharing that...maybe more so thinking out loud at this point. Plus, if I write it out here, guess maybe I will try to hold to it better. But feel free to provide feedback if youd like.
Actually, the truth is that I just want to spend the next 6+ months playing PS4, and I cant let some girl stop me from that very important objective.
I think Ive been trying too hard (the fact that I even consider this work is probably a big problem). I was trying to avoid the why cant I find someone, even though I just sit at home and do nothing all the time issue. Hence signing up for multiple dating sites, being more active (i.e., messaging girls even if they DO believe in ghosts, or something silly like that), joining lots of meetup groups, joining a gym, going out more (at least for things Im comfortable with), and even trying out things like Speed Dating. Ive had some fun with a lot of that (primarily meetup groups), and certainly met some cool people, but definitely havent come close to starting any kind of relationships with anyone. I end up putting in way too much time and putting a lot of pressure on myself I think, which just bums me out a bit when the results arent paying off. I think it might just be a good idea to quit worrying about that all for a while, and focus on myself a bit.
I think Ill be closing all my online profiles except for OKCupid. Thats the only site that Ive actually enjoyed. Not a lot (it seems primarily married women and GAFers like my profile, but not so much the single ladies), but I would like to keep it open if only just to find some new friends/penpals. The others havent resulted in anything positive, and I dont really feel the need to waste anymore time/money on them. Even with OKC, Ill probably only check it if I receive any messages.
I think I might have felt the need to "find someone" a few months ago (or at least I didnt want to shut the door on finding someone), but at this point, Im not sure I really care anymore (it would be nice, but I dont think it is priority #1 anymore). Ive recently started having some new life/career aspirations, so I might try pursuing that for a bit. Or at least sculpting those ideas out some...theyre still pretty raw/amorphous at this point. Better that than checking out TInder every few hours.
Not sure what the point is in sharing that...maybe more so thinking out loud at this point. Plus, if I write it out here, guess maybe I will try to hold to it better. But feel free to provide feedback if youd like.
Actually, the truth is that I just want to spend the next 6+ months playing PS4, and I cant let some girl stop me from that very important objective.
So tell me if this is a bad idea or not. Usually, with that preface, it is. But it's been a week since the first date with this girl and she's been elusive as fuck. Told me she wanted a second date but has been impossible to communicate with for a week now. I'm thinking of calling her today.
The past three texts from her are apologies for either not calling me back, for being really busy with school, and for not being able to meet me for lunch and I told her where I'd be at a certain time if she wanted to join.
I'm getting the feeling she's just sending these apologies to be nice and doesn't really care, otherwise she would have made the effort to meet up or make plans of her own with me. But, since I enjoyed my time with this girl and haven't been told explicitly no or completely abandoned yet, I'm still trying to communicate with her with minimal expectations.
I called her on Monday and she didn't pick up and texted back two days later saying sorry she didn't call me back. I'm at the point where I just want to know where we stand on that second date and texting just isn't accomplishing anything because she responds a day or two late every time.
Am I right in thinking I don't have really anything to lose in this situation by calling her one final time to try to plan something? I mean, she's already not contacting me past one off texts. She has Fridays and Mondays off, so in theory she's not busy although that didn't work in my favor when I called before. I guess it might come off as clingy to try to contact her so persistently but I would rather chance her picking up and planning that second or her not picking up and then me just dropping this once and for all. Is it smarter to play passive here and wait her out (which I'm 80% sure will end with her dropping into obscurity), or is a phone call not a bad bet?
The past three texts from her are apologies for either not calling me back, for being really busy with school, and for not being able to meet me for lunch and I told her where I'd be at a certain time if she wanted to join.
I'm getting the feeling she's just sending these apologies to be nice and doesn't really care, otherwise she would have made the effort to meet up or make plans of her own with me. But, since I enjoyed my time with this girl and haven't been told explicitly no or completely abandoned yet, I'm still trying to communicate with her with minimal expectations.
I called her on Monday and she didn't pick up and texted back two days later saying sorry she didn't call me back. I'm at the point where I just want to know where we stand on that second date and texting just isn't accomplishing anything because she responds a day or two late every time.
Am I right in thinking I don't have really anything to lose in this situation by calling her one final time to try to plan something? I mean, she's already not contacting me past one off texts. She has Fridays and Mondays off, so in theory she's not busy although that didn't work in my favor when I called before. I guess it might come off as clingy to try to contact her so persistently but I would rather chance her picking up and planning that second or her not picking up and then me just dropping this once and for all. Is it smarter to play passive here and wait her out (which I'm 80% sure will end with her dropping into obscurity), or is a phone call not a bad bet?
Delicious Waffles
Member
You could only do so much. I'd stop texting, not that you're coming off as clingy, just because you've got to wait days for a response. If you wanna try and call, it's up to you. Personally, I'd leave it and let her make the move in planning a second date. She said she wanted one so, if that's the case, let her plan it since she's constantly busy. If it never comes, so be it. It seems like she's just hanging on by a thread in your book anyway.
HER: So you want to hangout sometime?
ME: yes, when?
HER: I am free tonight if you are
ME: (internally)
Going to play it cool but I am pretty pumped.
Last night went well but it feels like we keep starting over again since it had been 2 weeks since I had last seen her. At least she initiated seeing me this time. I was nervous until I got there and we started talking and the nerves just went away. She made some really good spaghetti and salad and I kept her company in the kitchen and helped clean up after.
I asked her about doing something this weekend and she says that she is down if she doesn't go out of town.
PflargBlarg
Member
Nah man, don't do anything more. I've learned by now that if you're having to put in serious effort over a week or more to even try and SEE her then she doesn't give two shits about you. It's always good to flip the situation around and see if it makes sense from your side. You're contacting her multiple times, clearly interested in seeing her again. If you were her, and interested in seeing you, wouldn't you be doing the same, or actually responding in some real way to contact?
I think you already know this is pretty much over.
Thanks for the advice guys. Outside perspective is always helpful. Half of me knows this girl is likely gone but the other half that refuses to be defeatist wants to throw in one last hurrah with a phone call to see if anything turns up.
I'll resign to just wait the weekend out and see if she tries to contact me. If not I'll just give her one last call on Monday and let that be the nail in the coffin.
I'll resign to just wait the weekend out and see if she tries to contact me. If not I'll just give her one last call on Monday and let that be the nail in the coffin.
I hope things work out the way you want them to bud!
Weeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!
We'll see where things are after this weekend. It sounded like she was probably not going out of town.
edit: I'm thinking of how to talk to her about making "us" a thing. Saying that I don't want to date anybody else and that I think we are really good together based on the time we have spent and that I want her.
PflargBlarg
Member
We both have plenty of money and most of what you would call dates that we do is still just being with each other at one of our apartments. We make dinner together and then throw on a movie or watch a couple more episodes of one of our tv shows. It's basically free.
We also do karaoke every now and then, and the only cost there is however much you want to spend on beer.
If you're talking specifically going out and doing something, comedy shows are usually very inexpensive depending on what night you go. You're getting close to cold times in Boston so I'd say it would be difficult to find anything completely free to do since I wouldn't want to be outside for super long.
I am a huge fan of making dinner together. If both parties love cooking it is a great way to spend a night.
That's not a bad idea. It's been long enough if you ask me. Tell/show her that you're confident a relationship will work and that she does not need to shy away from it anymore. She needs to give it a chance.
Yes it has and yes she does.
My thinking is that she may say that she isn't ready and has a lot of things going on...
I have shown that I am a very good listener and I care about her and would be more than willing to help her work or talk through anything but I want to do that together.
I don't think we call those dates. Making dinner and watching something is what we do on the nights we're both free.
I'm talking about something a little more special than that. Once they get the frog pond ready for skating I'll take her to that, otherwise I don't have many ideas....
HOWEVER, one thing I will regard as a date (especially for me) is that I FINALLY convinced her to watch Lord of the Rings with me.
She, being a typical girl, doesn't like anything cool. We always have to compromise on what to watch because she likes a lot of dumb reality tv stuff and wedding shows, refuses to watch anything sci fi/fantasy or action oriented.
She has never seen Lord of the Rings so this is a big moment
HOWEVER, one thing I will regard as a date (especially for me) is that I FINALLY convinced her to watch Lord of the Rings with me.
She, being a typical girl, doesn't like anything cool. We always have to compromise on what to watch because she likes a lot of dumb reality tv stuff and wedding shows, refuses to watch anything sci fi/fantasy or action oriented.
She has never seen Lord of the Rings so this is a big moment
SMH, awful taste. My friend and I just did our annual extended marathon. We were gonna add Hobbit but we figured it would be better to watch that before going to see the second.
PsihoPerihelion
Member
So GAF, after hanging out for almost a month and a half with this girl every week and almost 3 times a week, she suddenly became more distant and colder. Last sunday she finally told me that she was trying to stay away and because she didn't wanted me to misinterpret things between us. That exact same moment she just dissapearedand we haven't talk for the entire week. Yesterday I sent her a message to her cellphone asking what's exactly going on. I got today a reply saying something like "all I can say about your message is gg :/" (she's a huge LoL fan so always uses that term that I can hardly understand lol)
We are not dating exactly, but we were knowing eachother and having a freaking blast. She left the window open for a relationship and suddenly, she changed her attitude towards me.
I have not enjoyed the last couple of weeks hanging out with her because of that change.
What should I do, guys?
We are not dating exactly, but we were knowing eachother and having a freaking blast. She left the window open for a relationship and suddenly, she changed her attitude towards me.
I have not enjoyed the last couple of weeks hanging out with her because of that change.
What should I do, guys?
Yeah she's the worst. I'm gonna try and show her some good movies because I feel I deserve to watch something I want and want her to see. We usually end up watching something she wants and that I'm ok with.
She's lucky I love her more than I don't like her terrible taste in everything
Sounds like she doesn't want a relationship. If you're ok with being her friend (and seeing if that works out) then you should communicate that. I feel people think of the friend zone as being something incredibly negative. I've pursued girls that I ended up and still am, friends with today. If they don't feel the same way about you that you do to them then don't bother, and just take her as an awesome friend.
level_e11even
Banned
GG is short for good game. In competitive games, it's used to congratulate the winning team on a good match. In contrary, it can also be used to show inferiority or just loss at something. It could be complete loss of hope for something, or just giving up entirely on something; stating it was a good run but its over, GG (good game).
Also, when used directly at someone, it can be construed as a negative or condescending remark. Like, let's say you're an indie developer. You release your game, but it's buggy as hell. I would say "I glitched out and fell through the floor on Lvl 1. GG Bennett Salander!"
Also, the fact that she added " :/ " at the end just adds to my theory that she changed her mind due to someone or something you or someone else did.
My theory, with the info you've provided? The tone of that sentence was of disappointment. Did you do something to upset her? Maybe you weren't sure if things were going to work out with her and maybe you started talking a little more liberally around other females and she noticed, taking it as a sign of disinterest? Perhaps she figured avoiding you before the inevitable happened was a good defense mechanism.
The change of mind is a little too sudden, and I feel we don't know all the necessary details. If I were you I would talk to her personally; read her body language. If she actually seems upset and you are POSITIVE you didn't do anything, then its possible she misread your behavior for something else (uninterest) and she's keeping a distance so you don't hurt her. I need more info though, the are just far too many variables at play.
Yeah she's the worst. I'm gonna try and show her some good movies because I feel I deserve to watch something I want and want her to see. We usually end up watching something she wants and that I'm ok with.
She's lucky I love her more than I don't like her terrible taste in everything
Hahaha.
The most I ever watch of "typical" girl stuff is wedding dress shows when I'm really bored (some are pretty!) and a couple of CW shows. Hahaha. Oh well.
Good luck! My sister didn't like LOTR until her boyfriend made her marathon and now she grudgingly enjoys it haha.
PlayALLtheGames
Banned
Where do some of you meet these chicks? "All I can say about your message is gg :\"? Da fuq?
I think you can safely assume the relationship potential here is over. You can probably tell her, "That's cool; I'm fine being friends" (if you are). Now, if I was you, I would say that but I would wait for her to ask me to hang out first and, if she didn't, I'd assume she's not even interested in being friends and I'd forget about her. You might ask her to hang out first, but if she makes excuses or says no then, again, I'd assume she's not really even interested in being friends.
The only thing I can guess here is that maybe she got spooked that you were taking the relationship more seriously than her and wanted more than she did. I don't know. Hope everything works out, though.
level_e11even
Banned
The one and only rule for first dates is: it has to be an interpersonal date. As in, it's main purpose is to get to know each other. The mere fact you both agreed to meet means you are both physically attracted to each other; the first date is meant to create a personal/emotional attraction (if any).
So, with that said: cooking on the first date is fine. Do keep in mind, however, cooking at a dater's house does bring a romantic connotation, and somewhat elevates (to varying degrees depending on the person) the level of expectation. I mean, you are cooking dinner, with your food, at your home (think: you don't know her favorite kind of music and she already knows where you live). Most women do find it romantic (and women love men who can cook), but some can be taking a little aback by this due to the slightly more personal nature of the environment.
(Not to mention, the implication that your bedroom is just across the living room!)
My advice is, ask her, just not directly. Be subtle. You have to sort of gauge her level of interest, to know if she wouldn't have a problem going to your place. (This wouldn't be much of a problem if, say, you guys are actually co-workers, classmates or met through a mutual friend. But if you asked her out on the street, then she's more likely to not be ok with jumping into your house/apartment this soon.)
I was subjected to a "Sister Wives" marathon last night. I survived!
And was entertained
electricshake
Member
Personally I wouldn't be a fan of going to the guy's place for a first date. It would make me think 'oh he just wants to sleep with me'. Would feel like there was pressure on me to stay over or whatever. But that's just me, other girls might not care.
I can't even deal with that show.
Only one on that channel is Say Yes to the Dress haha. Pretty dresses I will never wear! Never want to but they're nice to look at.
I've got a second first date with a girl I fucked up with. I'm taking her to the German/Christmas market in Birmingham. She sounded really up for it, and sounds kinda keen to give it another shot, I just need to make sure I don't fuck up. Any general advice to give, fellas?
So there's this girl I talked about here a few weeks ago who never replied to my text or my call, so I thought she didn't want to talk to me at all. But well what do you know? she took her sweet time (like 3 weeks) but she did call me back . We'll be meeting up next week, I suggested we go for a movie and then she suggested we can follow it with drinks, but I'm not sure if this is a date or not. Hell I don't even know if she's available, all though most girls in relationships name drop their BF or mention them every now and then but not everyone is the same.
Can I simply be direct and politely ask her if she's seeing anyone? And that if she's not I'd like to take things further ahead with her? Or do I just automatically assume that since she did call me back she did so because she's interested? I'm terrible at playing the sign games mind you.
Can I simply be direct and politely ask her if she's seeing anyone? And that if she's not I'd like to take things further ahead with her? Or do I just automatically assume that since she did call me back she did so because she's interested? I'm terrible at playing the sign games mind you.
Delicious Waffles
Member
So just an update to my situation:
I had to head to class early to get something from my teacher in her office. Girl I like is having a meeting with her. Outside the office, there's chairs so I sit there, reading. Another girl from my class sits with me while she's doing some work. Girl I like finishes her meeting and sits with us.
We're all just talking and the girl I like drops that she went out on a date this past week. Other girl asks how it went. Girl I like says that it went well.
After hearing that, it kinda felt like a huge kick in the gut. I mean, I was planning on asking her out but, now, I'm not so sure. Is it something I should still attempt, despite knowing this, or should I just move on?
I had to head to class early to get something from my teacher in her office. Girl I like is having a meeting with her. Outside the office, there's chairs so I sit there, reading. Another girl from my class sits with me while she's doing some work. Girl I like finishes her meeting and sits with us.
We're all just talking and the girl I like drops that she went out on a date this past week. Other girl asks how it went. Girl I like says that it went well.
After hearing that, it kinda felt like a huge kick in the gut. I mean, I was planning on asking her out but, now, I'm not so sure. Is it something I should still attempt, despite knowing this, or should I just move on?
youngwerther
Banned
edit: forget it
- Status