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Asking out a female friend... bad news bears or worth the risk?
- Thread starter YakiSOBA
- Start date
- Status
Father_Mike
Member
YakiSOBA said:haha yeah, that makes sense! ill keep that in mind tomorrow
Question though: what should I do in moments of silence, because I know it's bound to happen... what happens when I run out of interesting things to say?
act like the silence doesn't bug you. DO NOT LOOK NERVES...EVER.
Your goal shouldn't be too shower her with "interesting things". Just be a conversationalist and have fun. If there is something to be said, then say it. You don't want it to seem like you're trying to impress her. If there's silence, oh well. That's inevitable. Silence is healthy. Just be comfortable. If you're comfortable then you can respond naturally to silence. And maybe she should be the one to say something sometimes. etc. Just don't worry about the small things. Go have fun. Set things up beforehand so you have a plan framed out (like, drinks or dinner afterwards at a nice place and make it seem spontaneous), but otherwise let everything else go as it will.YakiSOBA said:haha yeah, that makes sense! ill keep that in mind tomorrow
Question though: what should I do in moments of silence, because I know it's bound to happen... what happens when I run out of interesting things to say?
AlphaSnake
...and that, kids, was the first time I sucked a dick for crack
Silence is fine. You don't want to come off like a blubbering fool by constantly yapping. Take a breath -- especially when you guys are eating. When you're not chewing and you have something interesting to say...say it. But if you're carving away at a steak or have food in your mouth (as little as it may be) don't -- not yet. Eating with food in your mouth can only be done once you're going out.
Anyways, those moments of silents will suffice and will also give you time to have something funny pop into your head. Take it easy. Relax. Be yourself. And be confident if even a weee bit sarcastically cocky!
If you do the cocky thing, make sure she knows you're kidding.
Anyways, those moments of silents will suffice and will also give you time to have something funny pop into your head. Take it easy. Relax. Be yourself. And be confident if even a weee bit sarcastically cocky!
If you do the cocky thing, make sure she knows you're kidding.
Father_Mike
Member
YakiSOBA said:never thought about it like that .. haha wow, ive been doing this wrong.. ALL WRONG!! :lol
Oh yeah, I found out her fav. books are romance of the three kingdoms and "The paradise war" -- ill try to give em a good read, then i'll have tons of ammunition
better go with the paradise war first because Romance is that size of two, thats right TWO text book. If you start now you might have it done by the time you two are married.
that way you won't have to fear any akward silences on the honey moon :lol
YakiSOBA said:never thought about it like that .. haha wow, ive been doing this wrong.. ALL WRONG!! :lol
Oh yeah, I found out her fav. books are romance of the three kingdoms and "The paradise war" -- ill try to give em a good read, then i'll have tons of ammunition
I don't think it's necessary or a good thing to take such a huge interest in her hobbies at this time. If she finds out about it, she might just think that you're trying too hard.
AlanHemberger
Banned
The answer is obvious!YakiSOBA said:haha yeah, that makes sense! ill keep that in mind tomorrow
Question though: what should I do in moments of silence, because I know it's bound to happen... what happens when I run out of interesting things to say?
Pass gas!
empanada said:This thread is seriously giving me Densha Otoko flashbacks. :lol :lol :lol
Don't forget to pull the put your arms behind her in the dark theatre move.
That's not a bad idea. If you've been joking around up to this point, a really exxagerated yawn -->outstretched arm behind back would be good.
ForzaItalia
Banned
YakiSOBA said:Question though: what should I do in moments of silence, because I know it's bound to happen... what happens when I run out of interesting things to say?
Just whip it out and plop it on the table. No more silence....
Ask her out but dont ask her out
Be cocky and funny but be sincere at the same time
Be playful and aloof but also make it clear its a date
Be yourself but be more confident
Be confident but also make sure you are sufficiently vunerable so you dont sound like a cock
I love GAF advise.
Seriously guys the thread has continued on good intentions but we could well end up confusing the hell out of the poor guy to the point he doesnt know what the **** he is doing. My advice Yaki if its worth anything is to just have fun and enjoy yourself. But at the same time remember you have a goal.......etc
Be cocky and funny but be sincere at the same time
Be playful and aloof but also make it clear its a date
Be yourself but be more confident
Be confident but also make sure you are sufficiently vunerable so you dont sound like a cock
I love GAF advise.
Seriously guys the thread has continued on good intentions but we could well end up confusing the hell out of the poor guy to the point he doesnt know what the **** he is doing. My advice Yaki if its worth anything is to just have fun and enjoy yourself. But at the same time remember you have a goal.......etc
The Interrobanger
Member
I'd give you advice, but you're older than I am and never been out on a date before therefore I consider you a lost cause. You'll probably **** this up because A) you think too much and B) you have no confidence. My advice do the opposite. Good luck buddy.
The Interrobanger
Member
Xzior said:
Exactly. Tough love my friends, it's time for little manga-boy to grow a pair and stop getting worked up over nothing.
I GOT A GIRLFRIEND........
I GOT A GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!
HAHAHA! ME! ME!
Seriously, what the hell... this doesn't even feel REAL... I don't get it... I don't want to go to sleep because I'm scared I'll wake up and this will all be a friggin' dream!
The SCOOP:
Casino Royale at 1030pm EST (wow, kick ass movie btw!!)
We're watching it, things are cool... we're sharing a thing of fuzzy peaches.. I don't really how it happened because I was:
a) really nervous during the movie, didn't want to do anything that'd make her think i was a pervert/creep
b) had to force my head to the screen because it kept wanting to look at where her hands were for some reason
but halfway through the movie, we were holding hands and she was leaning in her seat near me... at first i didn't really even notice, but once I did i started feeling really weird
I tried my best to act natural, and as the movie went on that's exactly what it felt like! IT was the most awesome feeling ever haha, don't really know how to explain what I mean :/
After the movie, it was around 1:30am... i had to use the washroom so she waited outside...
im in the washroom, and I start freaking out.. cuz GAF, I had no idea what to do at this point! During the movie, things couldn't have gone any better.. but now, it was a whole different situation... and to make matters worse I rushed myself at the sink and got a bit of water on my pants... but at least it was dark out so whatever
Im heading out towards the entrance, and i see her outside standing there... and i had nothing. I started to think of what I could talk about, but then I remember someone here saying don't come up with any pre-scripted dialogue because it just wont work... so I decided screw it, just gonna walk out there and see what happens..
Her back was facing the doors, so she didnt see me approach.. and I saw another dude around the corner was hugging his girlfriend (im assuming) around the waist from behind, with his head on her shoulders.... it looked kinda comfortable and i got the idea that i could just say i was keeping her warm... that'd count as flirting I guessed..
So i get behind her, and put my arms around her waist.. didnt really put my head on her shoulders though, and just said "wow its cold out"... then the best thing in the world happened.
She put her hands on my hands, and i dunno i probably creamed my pants like 10 times in a row when that happened, but anyways.. we made small talk until our cab arrived, sat together in the back.. and she had her head on my shoulders the whole ride back, and we were holding hands...
got back to dorms, i walked her to her dorm (HOLDING HANDS!!!!) and it was really quiet, but then I remembered GAF saying "have confidence and the moments of silence will feel natural" so I just kept my mouth shut (even though my head was trying to desperately think of things to ask her to keep a conversation)... get to the entrance of her dorm, and she says "you're a good guy, you'll take care of me wont you?" in a joking kind of way..
I almost choked when I blurted out "haha of course"... then she kissed me ON THE LIPS, it happened so fast I had no clue what the hell was going on.. all I know was that I wouldn't be wearing those pair of underwear again...
me after my first kiss:
so i tell her "gnite" and that i had a great time, and i wanted to say like 10 other things but I knew i should probably shut up... so i just left it at that.. she says she'll call me tomorrow (TODAY)
THIS BETTER F*CKING MEAN I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND, OR ELSE IM GOING TO GO /WRIST
ahem... anyways, that's my update and I dont know what else to say... except that most of you (99%) were right, and that it def. wasnt as hard as I thought it'd be! when i go in without all the prescripted scenarios ive run in my head 99999x times, everything just falls into place and it works!
I hope anyone who ever falls in the same situation as me takes this advice... its ALL OR NOTHING BABY!!! Now I got a raging boner and probably won't be able to sleep until she calls me... O SNAP!
I GOT A GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!
HAHAHA! ME! ME!
Seriously, what the hell... this doesn't even feel REAL... I don't get it... I don't want to go to sleep because I'm scared I'll wake up and this will all be a friggin' dream!
The SCOOP:
Casino Royale at 1030pm EST (wow, kick ass movie btw!!)
We're watching it, things are cool... we're sharing a thing of fuzzy peaches.. I don't really how it happened because I was:
a) really nervous during the movie, didn't want to do anything that'd make her think i was a pervert/creep
b) had to force my head to the screen because it kept wanting to look at where her hands were for some reason
but halfway through the movie, we were holding hands and she was leaning in her seat near me... at first i didn't really even notice, but once I did i started feeling really weird
I tried my best to act natural, and as the movie went on that's exactly what it felt like! IT was the most awesome feeling ever haha, don't really know how to explain what I mean :/
After the movie, it was around 1:30am... i had to use the washroom so she waited outside...
im in the washroom, and I start freaking out.. cuz GAF, I had no idea what to do at this point! During the movie, things couldn't have gone any better.. but now, it was a whole different situation... and to make matters worse I rushed myself at the sink and got a bit of water on my pants... but at least it was dark out so whatever
Im heading out towards the entrance, and i see her outside standing there... and i had nothing. I started to think of what I could talk about, but then I remember someone here saying don't come up with any pre-scripted dialogue because it just wont work... so I decided screw it, just gonna walk out there and see what happens..
Her back was facing the doors, so she didnt see me approach.. and I saw another dude around the corner was hugging his girlfriend (im assuming) around the waist from behind, with his head on her shoulders.... it looked kinda comfortable and i got the idea that i could just say i was keeping her warm... that'd count as flirting I guessed..
So i get behind her, and put my arms around her waist.. didnt really put my head on her shoulders though, and just said "wow its cold out"... then the best thing in the world happened.
She put her hands on my hands, and i dunno i probably creamed my pants like 10 times in a row when that happened, but anyways.. we made small talk until our cab arrived, sat together in the back.. and she had her head on my shoulders the whole ride back, and we were holding hands...
got back to dorms, i walked her to her dorm (HOLDING HANDS!!!!) and it was really quiet, but then I remembered GAF saying "have confidence and the moments of silence will feel natural" so I just kept my mouth shut (even though my head was trying to desperately think of things to ask her to keep a conversation)... get to the entrance of her dorm, and she says "you're a good guy, you'll take care of me wont you?" in a joking kind of way..
I almost choked when I blurted out "haha of course"... then she kissed me ON THE LIPS, it happened so fast I had no clue what the hell was going on.. all I know was that I wouldn't be wearing those pair of underwear again...
me after my first kiss:
so i tell her "gnite" and that i had a great time, and i wanted to say like 10 other things but I knew i should probably shut up... so i just left it at that.. she says she'll call me tomorrow (TODAY)
THIS BETTER F*CKING MEAN I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND, OR ELSE IM GOING TO GO /WRIST
ahem... anyways, that's my update and I dont know what else to say... except that most of you (99%) were right, and that it def. wasnt as hard as I thought it'd be! when i go in without all the prescripted scenarios ive run in my head 99999x times, everything just falls into place and it works!
I hope anyone who ever falls in the same situation as me takes this advice... its ALL OR NOTHING BABY!!! Now I got a raging boner and probably won't be able to sleep until she calls me... O SNAP!
The Interrobanger
Member
uummmm...one date does not mean you have a girlfriend. You are now "dating someone", but a "girlfriend insinuates you have a relationship.
I never read your whole post, because I want to refrain from killing myself before I get a Wii, but congrats on a successful date?
EDIT: Kiss on the lips? If it was less than 5 seconds and no tongue was involved, it doesn't really count bud. :lol
I never read your whole post, because I want to refrain from killing myself before I get a Wii, but congrats on a successful date?
EDIT: Kiss on the lips? If it was less than 5 seconds and no tongue was involved, it doesn't really count bud. :lol
Chairman Yang
if he talks about books, you better damn well listen
.
Chairman Yang
if he talks about books, you better damn well listen
GAF curse broken?
Boogie, I now demand results from you (and post about it).
Boogie, I now demand results from you (and post about it).
davepoobond
you can't put a price on sparks
sniff sniff yakisoba is now a man. it was a great 7 pages of growth
Tchu-Espresso
likes mayo on everthing and can't dance
That was a nice story. I couldnt help but smile while read it.
Good work man.
Good work man.
LizardKing
Member
this thread has blossomed. touching breaks barriers i told you man. congrats.
Exclamation-One
Member
Congats.
But don't freak out or let your guard completely down at this point. I'm going to put in my two cents here, and say: At this point, do NOT question whether or not you are her boyfriend!
Wait for her to call... or depending on how the evening went, it might be expected that you initiate contact at this point. Either way, inform her that you had a good time, and that you want to take her out to dinner. If she questions whether or not it's a date, say something along the lines of, "Yes, like a date, what else?"
In any case, act and believe that the ball is in YOUR court, and that you are defining the terms of the relationship, and do NOT act like you are waiting for her 'approval.'
My best advice to you: Believe that she must win YOUR approval, and not the other way around. Yes, this ties into the whole 'cocky/funny' thing, bu seriously, you do NOT need her approval, and make it clear that you are in no way dependent on her responses/actions. You are your own man, and you should have no shame in telling her how/when you want to take things further.
Again, congrats!
P.S. let GAF know when you are trying to bang this girl for the first time. We will all have helpful advice!
But don't freak out or let your guard completely down at this point. I'm going to put in my two cents here, and say: At this point, do NOT question whether or not you are her boyfriend!
Wait for her to call... or depending on how the evening went, it might be expected that you initiate contact at this point. Either way, inform her that you had a good time, and that you want to take her out to dinner. If she questions whether or not it's a date, say something along the lines of, "Yes, like a date, what else?"
In any case, act and believe that the ball is in YOUR court, and that you are defining the terms of the relationship, and do NOT act like you are waiting for her 'approval.'
My best advice to you: Believe that she must win YOUR approval, and not the other way around. Yes, this ties into the whole 'cocky/funny' thing, bu seriously, you do NOT need her approval, and make it clear that you are in no way dependent on her responses/actions. You are your own man, and you should have no shame in telling her how/when you want to take things further.
Again, congrats!
P.S. let GAF know when you are trying to bang this girl for the first time. We will all have helpful advice!
Ollie Pooch
In a perfect world, we'd all be homersexual
MrNibbles said:
this gave me images of mr potato head
*pop*
Forceatowulf
G***n S**n*bi
Congrats man, seriously. Hope you guys hit it off.
btw what is this "GAF curse" thing everyone keeps talking about in this thread? It intrigues me.
btw what is this "GAF curse" thing everyone keeps talking about in this thread? It intrigues me.
ChennehCis
Member
YakiSOBA said:
Hooray! Grats Yaki
While I did chuckle at posts expecting you to crash and burn, I'm happy to see you've succeeded!Do The Mario
Unconfirmed Member
Awesome news,
Just be cool, being over zealous is the biggest turn off ever.
Just be cool, being over zealous is the biggest turn off ever.
Haha congrats. You're like a little schoolgirl.....
I feel like I really helped. That's pretty cool. It was all you anyhow. Seemed like she did like you already and you just have to be yourself. If we helped you not-****-up then I suppose credit is due...
She's no one's girlfriend yet, though, buddy. That's obviously up for the two of you to decide at some point (could be after a couple weeks of regular interaction/dates OR if she's as giddy as you are the conversation could come up really soon). Either way don't get so comfortable yet. No farting! But at the same time don't be so concerned about every little step either. There's room for error. She likes you. She's not going to change her mind for little reasons. And don't change either. Sure, take our advice, but keep doing your thing because it's working for her.
Exclamation-One gave some good advice, but I think it needs balance: affection. It's good to be in control, but at the same time you want to be sure not to create distance between the two of you. Also, don't be too needy or anything. Whatever. It should come naturally. You seem to be doing well so far...
I feel like I really helped. That's pretty cool. It was all you anyhow. Seemed like she did like you already and you just have to be yourself. If we helped you not-****-up then I suppose credit is due...
She's no one's girlfriend yet, though, buddy. That's obviously up for the two of you to decide at some point (could be after a couple weeks of regular interaction/dates OR if she's as giddy as you are the conversation could come up really soon). Either way don't get so comfortable yet. No farting! But at the same time don't be so concerned about every little step either. There's room for error. She likes you. She's not going to change her mind for little reasons. And don't change either. Sure, take our advice, but keep doing your thing because it's working for her.
Exclamation-One gave some good advice, but I think it needs balance: affection. It's good to be in control, but at the same time you want to be sure not to create distance between the two of you. Also, don't be too needy or anything. Whatever. It should come naturally. You seem to be doing well so far...
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