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Ever been in a "not sure if we're dating or not" kind of situation?

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E

EatinOlives

Member
terrisus said:
Yeah, it's quite possible she's just not interested. But, if you are, continuing to go through all those situations waiting for something to happen just seems like a bad idea, if nothing else.

And, to be fair, I was pretty awkward myself. But, fortunately, I got the internet in 1996, when I was in 8th grade, and so that allowed me to find people then. Although finding people on the internet to have real-life relationships was a much different thing 18 years ago (darn, has it really been 18 years? Blah)
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Lol, just so you know I'm actually in grad school. It's just we're both engineering majors so we have the social skills of 8th graders :p

I'm not too terribly worried about it. I mean, if she's not interested there's really nothing else to it, and it's better for the both of us to look around again. But I can tell she's just as awkward as I am (she told me she hasn't dated anyone before), so I think I at least owe it to her to make sure that she is, in fact, not interested before I call it quits.
 
T

thesaucetastic

Unconfirmed Member
EatinOlives said:
Lol, just so you know I'm actually in grad school. It's just we're both engineering majors so we have the social skills of 8th graders :p

I'm not too terribly worried about it. I mean, if she's not interested there's really nothing else to it, and it's better for the both of us to look around again. But I can tell she's just as awkward as I am (she told me she hasn't dated anyone before), so I think I at least owe it to her to make sure that she is, in fact, not interested before I call it quits.
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Just be honest and ask her if she likes you, because you like her. Or something. You just need a little courage.
 
T

ThoughtsOfSpeaking

Banned
I've got a hookup that is basically my girl but refuse to give her that designation.

Yes im an asshole. Don't want a girlfriend but won't end it because she is an Olympic dicksucker.
 
P

Puppet Shadow

Member
EatinOlives said:
Lol, just so you know I'm actually in grad school. It's just we're both engineering majors so we have the social skills of 8th graders :p

I'm not too terribly worried about it. I mean, if she's not interested there's really nothing else to it, and it's better for the both of us to look around again. But I can tell she's just as awkward as I am (she told me she hasn't dated anyone before), so I think I at least owe it to her to make sure that she is, in fact, not interested before I call it quits.
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I'm kinda leaning towards the fact that she is interested in you, but just doesn't have the social skills to send the correct messages. Go with a direct approach, it either works out or you're saved from having to go on more awkward dates.
 
J

- J - D -

Member
Yeah, when I was younger. But now and even back then I'd make a point to make a bold gesture that gave me answers.

Crayons said:
I asked him if he missed me and he said "the bed is cold without you". Surely that means something..
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I'm glad this worked out well for you, op.
 
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UraMallas

Member
I feel like girls have this problem a lot more than guys. Typically, as a guy, I just let things progress until it's obvious but I've had a few girls pick at me about it. I always hate that.
 
D

Derwind

Member
I know I put a girl in that situation. Unintentionally. I did think she was hot but I liked her friendship a lot.

She constantly asked me out for dinner and shit, we'd talk about work, our hobbies and music.

Well I guess I sent off a lot of mixed signals, after a few months we grew a bit distant and then she started dating a guy twice her age and moved cities for him.

Shit....

One of my buddies recently told me that she was actually into me.

It was like someone threw a grenade into my brain.
 
S

SRG01

Member
EatinOlives said:
Nope, nope, and nope.

I know, it's my fault just as much. And believe me, it's just as awkward as you think it is.

I'm not being mean, I'm just not getting a vibe that she's all that interested. I keep going out thinking I'm definitely going to show interest at least once, then when I'm with her my brain is going "EVERYTHING SHE DOES SAYS SHE'S NOT INTERSTED, BAIL OUT".

Meanwhile, I'm sure she's thinking "wtf he keeps going out with me and doing nothing to show interest".

I bet you all have nostalgia for your middle school days right about now. :p



I'll get in touch with her soon enough to go out one last time and I'll straight out ask her. If it's awkward then fuck it, not any less awkward than a thousand dates with us talking like siblings.
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Holy shit, that sounds just like my date a couple of weeks ago. I had to straight up ask her a week later whether she was actually interested, but we put it off until next week when we're both done our semesters.
 
D

Dad

Member
I'm pretty sure the girl that's stalking me feels this way. I've tried explaining that she should stop, but I think it's going over her head.
 
H

Horseticuffs

Full werewolf off the buckle
I credit Neogaf and the Dating thread with kind of saving me from this fate with my current Girlfriend. We'd been on a few dates and I hadn't been able to pull off a kiss yet, but we were texting literally every waking moment for a week or so and sharing really personal info and such.

At one point she remarked what great friends we were becoming and how comfortable she was around me and it was like something out of a cartoon where like little alarms and sirens were going off in my head. I was like "FUCK NO BAD SHIT. ASSERT. ASSERT. ASSERT!" and I was immediately and quite literally like "No. Fuck that shit. You know I'm not just interested in being your friend, right?". At that point she verified that, yes, she knew and didn't mean it that way.

I'm learning you've got to be totally open, honest, and clear about your intentions, wants, and needs. I learned years ago what a total fucking doormat and coward I am by nature, and if I want anything nice to happen in life I've got to almost do the total opposite of my every natural inclination. I just knew I couldn't let that conversation die with her having even the fucking seed of the idea that I wanted to be just a friend, buddy, bro, or any of that shit and not view me as a potential mate.

Please, dudes and ladies, in matters of the heart save yourself some trouble and just be honest, decent, and assertive. It'll save everyone some bullshit later.
 
T

TacticalFox88

Banned
Horseticuffs said:
I credit Neogaf and the Dating thread with kind of saving me from this fate with my current Girlfriend. We'd been on a few dates and I hadn't been able to pull off a kiss yet, but we were texting literally every waking moment for a week or so and sharing really personal info and such.

At one point she remarked what great friends we were becoming and how comfortable she was around me and it was like something out of a cartoon where like little alarms and sirens were going off in my head. I was like "FUCK NO BAD SHIT. ASSERT. ASSERT. ASSERT!" and I was immediately and quite literally like "No. Fuck that shit. You know I'm not just interested in being your friend, right?". At that point she verified that, yes, she knew and didn't mean it that way.

I'm learning you've got to be totally open, honest, and clear about your intentions, wants, and needs. I learned years ago what a total fucking doormat and coward I am by nature, and if I want anything nice to happen in life I've got to almost do the total opposite of my every natural inclination. I just knew I couldn't let that conversation die with her having even the fucking seed of the idea that I wanted to be just a friend, buddy, bro, or any of that shit and not view me as a potential mate.

Please, dudes and ladies, in matters of the heart save yourself some trouble and just be honest, decent, and assertive. It'll save everyone some bullshit later.
Click to expand...

Someone learned from GAF?! Fucking finally!
 
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