Tell your parents. Suddenly this whole thing is no longer your problem. If they confront him and he gets angry with you for telling them they'll probably move to take you out of the equation since you aren't really the issue here. If they don't confront him it's their decision which I'm sure they'll make carefully. They're also probably in a better position than you to decide how to act on this. This is all provided you feel you can confide in your parents about this.
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My cousin is cheating on his wife.
- Thread starter B!TCH
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TheChewyWaffles
Member
First of all, you have no proof anything has happened.
Second of all, you have no proof anything has happened.
The temptation to cheat and going through with it are very different things.
Second of all, you have no proof anything has happened.
The temptation to cheat and going through with it are very different things.
Don't get involved lacking absolute certainty of what's going on. If at some point it becomes incontrovertible, don't confront the cousin, that's just liable to create a circus. There are doubtlessly better intermediaries than you, ones more acquainted with the affected and closer to the potential fallout. Pass on your concern and step back.
Clockwork
Member
LOL. I did not get the impression that the OP had any jealousy going on.
Wait, are you his cousin?
No harm no foul then, right?
Two wrongs don't make a right.
In this particular thread/situation this may be the only reason I wouldn't say anything. I might still tell the parents though.
People accusing him of jealousy or wanting to hook up with the wife need to read. Not only has the OP never met the woman, they live on different continents.
As for the topic at hand:
I don't understand why you don't discuss this with your parents? Doing so is not even an accusation; you're just telling them what you heard and what you think. Maybe they can provide you with more information about your cousin's marriage, or general insight on how to handle this type of situation for future reference (they're older than you and have been through marriage, they obviously know more than you can fathom). Let them decide what is right. The guy is literally a stranger and means nothing to you. It is incredibly silly to be bottling up the dirty laundry of a person you don't even know.
As for the topic at hand:
I don't understand why you don't discuss this with your parents? Doing so is not even an accusation; you're just telling them what you heard and what you think. Maybe they can provide you with more information about your cousin's marriage, or general insight on how to handle this type of situation for future reference (they're older than you and have been through marriage, they obviously know more than you can fathom). Let them decide what is right. The guy is literally a stranger and means nothing to you. It is incredibly silly to be bottling up the dirty laundry of a person you don't even know.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
Snitches get stitches.
Besides, why the fuck are you even worried about ths? You've only known him a week.
Besides, why the fuck are you even worried about ths? You've only known him a week.
Honestly, the whole "none of your business" angle just goes out the window when the cousin decided to not only try to make the OP an accessory, but does it in the most self-centered way possible (telling the OP's mom that the OP was taking him out without asking the OP first, and then trying to make the OP take him out even after the OP said he was tired). Cousin needs to respect other people's situations (like the OP being tired) if he wants others to respect his.
childplease
Banned
Let him cheat stop being a hater.
Bros before hoes.
Bros before hoes.
Honestly there's nothing surprising about his behaviour. Some married dudes don't grow up and will cheat when given the opportunity. That's why infidelity is still the number 1 reason for divorce (according to statistics).
Honestly I think being that you're cousins and you're both lads, he thought you would have bonded alot better. And he wanted to do some 'guy stuff' with his little cousin, like going out for a couple pints and talking to some birds (girls). And you might not know his real motives for cheating on his wife either. It may even be revenge for the wifey cheating on him or they might be in some open relationship shit. You never know.
I don't see the need to tell your parents. Are you an adult? If someone tells you something privately in confidence, I don't see the need to go bitch and inform the whole entire world about it. If I went around telling family everything I heard my cousins' saying, I'm sure it would cause tensions and even straight up fights in the family. You may even be labelled a 'shit stirrer'.
Honestly I think being that you're cousins and you're both lads, he thought you would have bonded alot better. And he wanted to do some 'guy stuff' with his little cousin, like going out for a couple pints and talking to some birds (girls). And you might not know his real motives for cheating on his wife either. It may even be revenge for the wifey cheating on him or they might be in some open relationship shit. You never know.
I don't see the need to tell your parents. Are you an adult? If someone tells you something privately in confidence, I don't see the need to go bitch and inform the whole entire world about it. If I went around telling family everything I heard my cousins' saying, I'm sure it would cause tensions and even straight up fights in the family. You may even be labelled a 'shit stirrer'.
I think you should tell your dad. and let cuzzo's punishment be trying to show off his swagger with your 50 year old parents hanging over his shoulder. They would probably be more likely to wet blanket his night, and keep him from doing what he wants to do. He wants you to be his enabler, but without one he might not have the chance to cheat. Plus your parents might enjoy a night of dancing and severe cockblocking.
Here's the thing. Some cultures aren't as anti-infidelity as American ones are. I dunno about his situation though.
Bonus answer:
Go and steal the girl from him. She's probably a hot blonde from the Ukraine who sounds cute when she says "I like your style, Mr Akira." /cries
Here's the thing. Some cultures aren't as anti-infidelity as American ones are. I dunno about his situation though.
Bonus answer:
Go and steal the girl from him. She's probably a hot blonde from the Ukraine who sounds cute when she says "I like your style, Mr Akira." /cries
Truth be told I'm not the type to snitch, but when a guy:
1) preaches religion to me
2) tells my mom I'm taking him out without asking me first (lying to my mom and showing no respect for my own schedule/wishes all in one go)
3) insists I take him out even after I say I'm tired
then I have no sympathy for him if he gets caught. Don't get me wrong. I think the OP has NO obligation to say anything. I just think he's within his rights if he decides to teach the cousin not to expect other people to bend to his wishes.
I thought about this. If I do anything about this it will be after he's left my house.
That seems to be to be the way to go but I'll wait until he leaves to avoid extreme awkwardness.
CoffeeJanitor
Member
The indifference to cheating in these threads is always surprising to me. Different morals I guess.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
Ready to rat the guy out at the drop of a hat but won't do it to his face. Classy.
That's a moronic attitude to have. This is not just about having sex with other people, it's the fact that STDs can spread this way and the wife has done NOTHING to deserve his asshole husband risk catching one of those and then transmit that to her.
Tell her, OP. She deserves to know her husband doesn't give a shit about their relationship OR health.
Ratting the guy out? I don't really have solid evidence so I'll just talk to my parents about it and see what they say. I can't exactly confront him unless I'm 100% sure that he did do something.
Class left any part of this when his cousin forced him to have to cover for his possible indiscretions.
DeaconKnowledge
Member
To be perfectly honest I think it's you who owes the guy the courtesy of telling him what he's doing to his wife is wrong. Give him the option to redeem himself instead of immediately selling him up the river by informing family.
This sounds like a pint of Haterade being served by the OP:
"He sounded like a teenaged school boy the way he went on about how he really wanted to see this woman and how she was really angry that he couldn't make it (she apparently, really wants him... because he's such a stud)"
Why italicize the last part? That sounds like hate/jealousy; maybe not.
Sidenote --> online and IRL I have never seen a woman make a thread like this. It's always a male ready to snitch at the fact that another male is pulling a woman when he already has one. Is it really in the name of morality or is it jealousy?
It'd be one thing if the potential snitch had standing (ex: close friend or relative being cheated on) but I've only seen dudes play the "moral police with no standing" role when it comes to these "dilemmas". ONE WEEK is still a fucking legendary meme though.
If cousin and wife have an arrangement to get with others, then that adds to OP should be quiet. He doesn't know anything about their relationship and as of 2 weeks ago didn't know anyone involved existed.
Who said it'd be a wrong? Maybe fat wife cheated and they had a "fine you have a freebie but I better not hear about it", then OP yaps lol.
Agree.
SapientWolf
Trucker Sexologist
Tell her what? That he's rawdogging it all over town? Unless I missed something, all the OP has is a vague account of a hypothetical meeting with a female that never happened.
I'd argue people suggesting the need to snitch need to grow up. Regardless of whether or not the guy actually cheated, telling his wife that he did will likely end their marriage and cause a broken home for their kids. It's not something to take lightly. You're going to destroy a family and all over something that may not have even happened.
I am normally a firm believer of the snitches get stitches mantra but for cheating spouses, I go against it. The other has the right to know.
IrishNinja
Member
ahahaha, this one gets me every time. so good.
for real though, here is your answer.
yeah man, it's very adult to put yourself in other people's business just to satiate your own ego. after all, the truth will set them free, and everybody's better off that way! things are so very simple to adults.
Clockwork
Member
But this mindset and opinion is even presented in threads where cheating is 100% crystal clear.
Once again, as a messenger are you really the one that caused the broken home/marriage to end or is it the person that could not keep their dick in their pants/could not keep their legs closed?
CoffeeJanitor
Member
Because having a cheater as a father and husband is a great thing
You are the one that caused the broken home if the guy didn't cheat. My stance comes from the fact I've had bullshit accusations levelled against me that have almost resulted in the relationship ending. I got "dobbed in" for shopping with another female. It was my sister, but that didn't matter, the shitstorm had already started.
As I said, if you're sure of it go ahead. But based on what the OP has said I'd stay the fuck out of it.
IrishNinja
Member
is not having a father somehow better? you have any idea how many men have cheated and yet somehow made excellent fathers?
more to the point: you really feel qualified to make this decision for that family?
ethics dont exist in a vacuum; if you don't consider the follow-through/logical reactions you'd cause, you're only doing "the right thing" for yourself.
Devolution
Member
All this shit gets negated when you realize someone has a right to know purely based on health reasons.
I agree. I'd 100% tell my parents. They know the guy better and might know the wife. Plus, the cousin doesn't sound very nice...
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
If you don't know for sure, don't do anything except maybe trying to find out. If you know for sure, 1 week rule.
POWERSPHERE
Member
OPs name...
And you in fact know your dad was a saint?
Thank god no one snitched on him then.. your childhood may have gone differently.
FreeMufasa
Junior Member
Do what you feel like, what you think is right.
I personally wouldn't though.
I personally wouldn't though.
IrishNinja
Member
for you. you left out that part.
assuming your metrics = everyone else's leads to many a poor decision, especially in ethical questions like this.
Devolution
Member
Should be for everyone who actually considers themselves a decent person. I'm sure cheaters are doing their damndest to wrap up and stuff.
Bay Maximus
Banned
B!TCH please. Tell him you don't want to be a part of it, but it's certainly not your place to play butt into their relationship.
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