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Tinder woes. Someone please hear me out.

hariseldon

Gold Member
Aug 22, 2018
3,537
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Thanks for the insight, hari. Always good seeing you around.

In response to Number 1, you're suggesting that I'm too young to settle down for one woman? I thought the average marriage age was in the late twenties for men (29). That I think puts me near prime settling down age no?

For number three, I suppose you're right. I should have said "unique" instead. We are going to the aquarium and a nice restaurant of her favorite cuisine, nothing too crazy I think. She said she's always wanted to go to the former!
Re 1 - perhaps it would be more accurate to say that you're too young to worry about finding that. You likely don't know yet what you want. You need to spend a few years trying out different options, seeing what works for you, and also you need to get the horny bastard out of your system. Once you're no longer led by your boner you can find what you're looking for, and you'll have a bit of understanding of women as people, with no pedestaling.
Re 3 - unique is good but remember women are people - some like posh food, some like a trip to a bowling alley or crazy golf or something a bit cheesy and daft. My first date with my wife we went to the cinema and watched Four Lions, a comedy about suicide bombers (not even a good one). I drank too much coke too quickly and could barely stop myself from burping constantly. Dating and sex and all that stuff should be something you can laugh at, you don't have to be Mr Suave James Bond or any of that bollocks - for the women who are worth keeping you can just have fun and be yourself. Human relationships are silly, messy things. You can't plan them perfectly, nor would it be fun if you could.
 

심포니

so it's not nice
Apr 2, 2013
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Re 1 - perhaps it would be more accurate to say that you're too young to worry about finding that. You likely don't know yet what you want. You need to spend a few years trying out different options, seeing what works for you, and also you need to get the horny bastard out of your system. Once you're no longer led by your boner you can find what you're looking for, and you'll have a bit of understanding of women as people, with no pedestaling.
Re 3 - unique is good but remember women are people - some like posh food, some like a trip to a bowling alley or crazy golf or something a bit cheesy and daft. My first date with my wife we went to the cinema and watched Four Lions, a comedy about suicide bombers (not even a good one). I drank too much coke too quickly and could barely stop myself from burping constantly. Dating and sex and all that stuff should be something you can laugh at, you don't have to be Mr Suave James Bond or any of that bollocks - for the women who are worth keeping you can just have fun and be yourself. Human relationships are silly, messy things. You can't plan them perfectly, nor would it be fun if you could.
I must make it clear that I'm not interested in sleeping around. Since I found her on Tinder, I can't really argue against the "thinking with my boner" bit since that's pretty much the name of the game, but I hope to simply settle down and that's that.

And yep -- as for RE3 you're definitely right there and I'm internalizing it. Thanks again buddy.
 

ROMhack

Gold Member
Jul 14, 2018
2,596
2,606
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I must make it clear that I'm not interested in sleeping around. Since I found her on Tinder, I can't really argue against the "thinking with my boner" bit since that's pretty much the name of the game, but I hope to simply settle down and that's that.

And yep -- as for RE3 you're definitely right there and I'm internalizing it. Thanks again buddy.
We're alike in that respect. I often speak with my mates who are sex mad and I'm like, yeah sex is cool with somebody I like but much less so with somebody I don't. Maybe just the way we're wired.

As for a date, may I suggest crazy golf. I did that on a first date once and it was very fun, easily the best idea I've had out of three types of dates I've been on (cinema, bar and crazy golf).

P.s. Thanks for the gold :messenger_beaming:
 
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심포니

so it's not nice
Apr 2, 2013
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We're alike in that respect. I often speak with my mates who are sex mad and I'm like, yeah sex is cool with somebody I like but much less so with somebody I don't. Maybe just the way we're wired.

As for a date, may I suggest crazy golf. I did that on a first date once and it was very fun, easily the best idea I've had out of three types of dates I've been on (cinema, bar and crazy golf).

P.s. Thanks for the gold :messenger_beaming:
Respect. 🤙🏾 Yeah it must be the wiring, it’s simply too difficult to be physically involved with someone without considerable emotional investment.

I’ve never heard of that, ‘crazy golf.’ I’m always up for new ideas so certainly I’m appreciative of your suggestion and going to look into it. It’s getting cold though and she’s starting to express concerns about that a bit, so..... fingers crossed, haha.

And yeah, of course. You’re a swell dude.
 
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AlphaMale

Gold Member
Apr 21, 2015
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134
410
But you said yourself that you're "super exclusive" and that you don't look at other girls once you've found "the one". With that, you should have disabled Tinder once things got good with the "the one".
 
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Guynamedbilly

Member
Feb 28, 2018
561
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You have no idea until you meet in person. My brother ended up marrying a girl he met online. He actually did even meet her in person and spent a month at her parent's house to get to know her. Turns out the whole family was lying to him and for most of their online conversations he was actually talking to her mother.

Invite her out to eat spaghetti a couple dozen times to get to really know her.
 

ROMhack

Gold Member
Jul 14, 2018
2,596
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You have no idea until you meet in person. My brother ended up marrying a girl he met online. He actually did even meet her in person and spent a month at her parent's house to get to know her. Turns out the whole family was lying to him and for most of their online conversations he was actually talking to her mother.
W-what?

Good for him though.
 
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captainraincoat

Gold Member
Nov 15, 2010
3,008
1,915
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My advice......your 23...take them both out (seperatly) unless you have fucked one of them a date is basically two people having fun together....you don't need to be in a relationship to do that.

Also...the one....as you call it is not always the one you click with off the bat

Good friend of mine married his boss who fired him 2 years earlier and he fucking hated to the point he poured battery acId over her car

Time reveals all and that rock sometimes polishes into a diamond
 
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Yoboman

Member
Sep 17, 2005
16,095
249
1,515
Do NOT take girls from Tinder on extravagant first dates, and prepare yourself for disappointments

So many girls I think I’ll click with I just don’t get along with at all in real life.

Recently had one basically tell me her sexual abuse history and to check my white male privelege all while completely overrunning the conversation about her shitty life