So I figured I'd give you guys an update, but I also need help with this current relationship I'm in. I've been dating this same girl since early February, we're not serious and it will most likely still only go on until late May when she leaves the area. There is a possibility she might stay and if that happens I'm torn between two things. Which requires some explanation, so here goes.
At the start of the relationship we were very intimate, we weren't having sex all the time, but there was stuff from making out, to a beej, to an old-fashioned. It was great. Well, she has gotten an internship and a job here so she has very little time off. We were still doing stuff then, but it had gone down from where we were at the start. Fast-forward over the last few weeks and stuff has gone REALLY cold, like no real intimacy whatsoever. We haven't had sex in over a month. Again I'm not looking to bang every chance we get, but at least some making out would be nice. She has ended every time we've gone out with a kiss goodnight and she has done some unexpected stuff that shows me she still digs me. There is chemistry there when we hang out, but it doesn't always feel like a sexual chemistry. But, last night was a bit weird and maybe I fucked it. I'm just looking for some insight.
So there are two bars next to each other that play good music and at one last night was a band we had both enjoyed. We had no plans to meet up or anything as she had work and a tutoring session. I figured I would roll down there see what the scene was like, and MAYBE she would be there. So I go and she is there having a good time. Just dancing like she enjoys, not with guys even, just having a good time. She even said "I figured I might see you here." when I showed up. But, it felt like she was avoiding me most of the night. Maybe she was just wanting to dance by herself, and maybe I didn't read it right, but aren't you supposed to on some songs dance with the guy you're dating? Sure I might not know how to swing dance like she does, but I can dance a little and not look like a fool if it is the right song.
So to sum up last night I decided to bounce early and I left her there. But here is the key thing about what got me truly thinking about this, there was no kiss goodbye. Just a smile and her saying "Alright, bye".
Now I realize that a couple things could be happening. She might just be tired most of the time from work and her internship so she doesn't have the energy to be intimate. The fact that she is leaving in May might be cause her to put space between us so the departure doesn't hit as hard as it would if we were any deeper than we already are. But, from the lack of intimacy that has developed over the last month, to her criticism of things I enjoy (I can't even talk to her about certain film or television genres because I know I would be wasting breath.), to the fact she may very well be leaving in May I'm thinking about killing this thing now.
Good friends say they see a real connection between us and we seem like a fantastic match. So here is the question GAF. Do I kill this now, or do I try and reignite some intimacy in a final "hail-mary". I of course am going to talk to her first about it and just see what her feelings are. But, should I be prepared for the worst?
TL; DR: Lack of intimacy over the last month and major cooling off has caused me to question current relationship. Do I kill it now, or do I try and reignite some passion?
Christ, this entire post makes me feel like I'm 45 and asking for marriage advice.
