Shmeagatory94
Member
I don't wipe, I just get in the shower quick and wash my ass.
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I don't wipe, I just get in the shower quick and wash my ass.
I've always gone between the legs back to front (BLB2F), why wouldn't you? Your legs are spread so you're getting prime access without having to lift a leg or stand. I never understood the shitty balls argument because I, like most people, have a taint that acts as a generous buffer between the two. I don't start wiping and then keep the toilet paper pinned against my body til I reach my belly button. You can feel where you're supposed to end the wiping motion and it's long before you reach the back of your sack. And if you're that worried about it then boom, your other hand can easily move everything out of the way.
BLB2F lets you check out how much more work you have to do and then just drop it right into the water, keeping everything contained in the bowl. Do most people go from the side? So you're just pulling shitty tissue out from under yourself and flinging shit particles into the air before you look at the paper and then drop it into the bowl in front of you? And doesn't that just have risks of getting it on your thigh or the seat?
The toilet paper. Before you wipe, do you just crumple the paper or do you fold it?
I used to be a crumpler but I found that folding saves way more paper
Lol these threads.
Very simple, baby wipes. Wipe up, down, sideways, whatever... baby wipes.
As a grown man having someone wipe your ass for you is the most depressing experience ever.Being an infant is where it's at. People wipe your ass for you.
https://media.giphy.com/media/hyobjGwTq2MaA/giphy.gif[IMG][/QUOTE]
The fuck dude.
dont forget to push some of the toilet paper in your asshole with your finger so you really get clean
why would baby wipes burn
I once clogged a toilet at a exgirlfriends house, and her mom was pissed
[...]
It's embarrassing for your mother in law to see the meal she cooked for you yesterday, floating there in her toilet, along with sweet corn, and ripped toilet paper.
I broke up with my girlfriend not long after that.
I don't think that term means what you think it means.
ive gotten my fudge packed
Christ. Use a bidet people. It's 2017. Stop smearing shit on yourselves.
If you got shit on your arm would you just smear it off with tissue and keep on trucking? No. Should be the same all over your body.
Why would wiping towards your balls be considered a good idea? Our boys already hang out close enough to our asshole, why wipe in such a way to bring that actual shit their way?
Like a scrubbing motion?I always wipe away from my balls.. but I've found that if I go towards the balls after some time, there's usually more in there that you just can't seem to get. I think you've gotta be comprehensive and wipe both ways.
"'I have by a long and curious experience found out a means to wipe my bum. The most lordly, the most excellent, the most convenient that was ever seen. I have wiped my tail with a hen, with a cock, with a pullet, with a calf's skin, with a hare, with a pigeon, with a cormorant, with an attorney's bag, with a Montero, with a falconer's lure. But to conclude, I say and maintain that of all the torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest of the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.'"
At home, one wipe, front to back, then jump into the shower and use plenty of soap with the shower hose.
Outside, alternating wipes - front to back, then back to front, two times each direction, then place neatly folded tissue in the crack and pull up the underwear.
Wear the folded tissue like a sanitary napkin for an hour or two (depending on how much I walk), then go back to the toilet, spread the cheeks so the tissue falls in the toilet, then wipe another four times, but with a bit of water in the tissue to really make sure it's all clean (or if I'm lucky, they will have alcohol to clean the seats, then I'll use that).
Hate having any kind of olfactory or visual indicator that I've gone number two, especially on the underwear.
Sadly, bidets aren't common here, there is literally no space at all for a separate bidet, and nobody sells those fancy two-in-ones.
I'm not a dude, but that seems like a good way to end up with a smelly taint
François Rabelais knew how to do it right:
"'I have by a long and curious experience found out a means to wipe my bum. The most lordly, the most excellent, the most convenient that was ever seen. I have wiped my tail with a hen, with a cock, with a pullet, with a calf's skin, with a hare, with a pigeon, with a cormorant, with an attorney's bag, with a Montero, with a falconer's lure. But to conclude, I say and maintain that of all the torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest of the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.'"
I've always gone between the legs back to front (BLB2F), why wouldn't you? Your legs are spread so you're getting prime access without having to lift a leg or stand. I never understood the shitty balls argument because I, like most people, have a taint that acts as a generous buffer between the two. I don't start wiping and then keep the toilet paper pinned against my body til I reach my belly button. You can feel where you're supposed to end the wiping motion and it's long before you reach the back of your sack. And if you're that worried about it then boom, your other hand can easily move everything out of the way.
BLB2F lets you check out how much more work you have to do and then just drop it right into the water, keeping everything contained in the bowl. Do most people go from the side? So you're just pulling shitty tissue out from under yourself and flinging shit particles into the air before you look at the paper and then drop it into the bowl in front of you? And doesn't that just have risks of getting it on your thigh or the seat?