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[televator]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

 

[perfectchaos007]

She probably knows more about the male reproductive system than you do. She's a professional let her do her job

 

[Instro]

Oh captain my captain.

 

[Big Chief Crazy Cone]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Thanks for making my day.

Seriously, it's a medical procedure. I've had female doctors rub warm gel on my balls for an ultrasound before... It's fine. They will be professional and you should be too.

 

[Iolo]

Over 150 posts and we don't even know what's wrong with your dick.

 

[notaskwid]

It'll be awkward when you drop your pants and you have it standing like a pine tree.

 

[Prototype Viktor]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

That's too hard to do

It'll be awkward when you drop your pants and have it standing like a pine tree.

He needs to make sure she has a nearby defib

 

[MiguelMexMIstery]

Report back to us what happens

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

most of the posts in this thread will be replies to this one lol

 

[massoluk]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

I will reply to a lot of threads with this

 

[ResoRai]

I had to get a checkup along with a physical, but the doctor didn't get word of the physical or something, so she just did my physical as well.

I wasn't planning on her doing it, she wasn't planning on doing it, and her trainee probably wasn't planning on seeing dick that day, but I just dropped my drawers and thanked her for taking the time do it.

If I can whip out unexpected dick for two you can whip out planned dick for one.

Spoiler

They're doctors mayne

 

[HotHamBoy]

Is this the new Friend Zone thread?

 

[Engell]

If you get a bit nervous, then just imagine that everyone is naked.. should help take off the edge

 

[rocketskates]

OP obviously has never had a significant other

 

[Animator]

The only thing I'd worry about is having a boner. So jerk off a couple times before going , I guess.

I don't know how the fuck someone can get a boner from a doctor with a plastic glove touching your balls and dick in the most unsexy way possible but this is gaf so it is probably a good idea.

 

[HiiiLife]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Imagine how boring OT would be if we didn't have socially awkward posters

 

[jossueinacoma]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

💀

 

[Azerare]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Perfect first post... I always ask this question with these threads?

 

[Toa TAK]

Imagine how boring OT would be if we didn't have socially awkward posters

True

Look at that friendzone thread

 

[TickleMeElbow]

I had a female doctor clamp my penis down with what felt like a clothespin and then slowly jam a camera up my urethra to look around my bladder for about 5-10 minutes.

I think you'll survive this.

Shit man I had a hot nurse try to stick a catheter up my dick, but for some reason it wouldn't go all the way in. Then another older lady nurse came in, but she couldn't do it either. They called in this other nurse, and this time it's a giant power lifter looking motherfucker. He failed as well.

So I had a hot nurse, a sweet middle aged lady, and a power lifter all staring intensely at my little ding dong trying to get this thing in. At one point the power lifter was like "it's like I'm hitting a brick wall in there".

Then they get this urologist to come in. He was pissed because he couldn't believe these nurses couldn't do it. He initially had trouble as well, but then he got frustrated and forced it in like he was Dante doing that stinger move or some shit. I could feel it enter my bladder. It hurt so bad. He walked out complaining like "See? No problem. I don't see why you guys can't do this!"

Then I watched Jurassic Park 3 on the TV while listening to the hot nurse talk shit about urologists.

 

[GuessMyUserName]

My ex is a doctor. She would come home and tell me about every shriveled tiny penis she encountered throughout her days and we would both laugh at those weak ass moist dudes while I banged her with my 10 incher.

Goodluck bro.

You shouldn't be laughing at tiny dicks when you're repping a paltry 10er on GAF

 

[30yearsofhurt]

She doesn't give a fuck what your prick looks like you prick.

Thread is sexist as fuck.

Then why is she looking at it?
If I was getting a medical professional to look at my genitalia I'd want them to at least care enough about examining it properly.

 

[Strangelove77]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

That's like, 75% of what's so entertaining about Neogaf. Horrible social skills keep me coming for more.

 

[Zen Aku]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

This. It's a doctor, they're professional. Just relax and let's them do their job.

 

[Hot Coldman]

If you get erect they can send you to prison. Good luck.

 

[L Thammy]

Just slice off your dick and you'll never have this issue ever again.

 

[Liamario]

OP, how old are you?

 

[kyser73]

I don't know how the fuck someone can get a boner from a doctor with a plastic glove touching your balls and dick in the most unsexy way possible but this is gaf so it is probably a good idea.

It's probably the first time it's happened in their adult life so could go either way.

 

[DrSlek]

Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts
Think unsexy thoughts

 

[Kuroi Gogeta]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

amazing first post lmao

 

[daveo42]

OP, if you are feeling legit nervous...maybe try breaking the ice with a joke. I heard women doctors love jokes, like:

It's been a bit cold out today.
I had a hard time getting here this morning.
or
Don't worry, it's just a casual erection. I get them all the time.

 

[H.Protagonist]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Thank you, Sai. My first thought opening GAF today and seeing some of the new threads.

 

[Orbis Tabula]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Hahahahaha

 

[Steeped in a Sea of Games]

snip

Jeeze! Swollen prostate or something? I'll admit it burned like hell when that camera passed into the bladder and the continued burning afterwards when it's time to pee... Oh god. And the blood... I have to have it done again sometime next summer and I'm not excited for it in the least bit.

 

[platakul]

if she tugs twice that means she's DTF*

*down to fenestrate

 

[Grazzt]

Shit man I had a hot nurse try to stick a catheter up my dick, but for some reason it wouldn't go all the way in. Then another older lady nurse came in, but she couldn't do it either. They called in this other nurse, and this time it's a giant power lifter looking motherfucker. He failed as well.

So I had a hot nurse, a sweet middle aged lady, and a power lifter all staring intensely at my little ding dong trying to get this thing in. At one point the power lifter was like "it's like I'm hitting a brick wall in there".

Then they get this urologist to come in. He was pissed because he couldn't believe these nurses couldn't do it. He initially had trouble as well, but then he got frustrated and forced it in like he was Dante doing that stinger move or some shit. I could feel it enter my bladder. It hurt so bad. He walked out complaining like "See? No problem. I don't see why you guys can't do this!"

Then I watched Jurassic Park 3 on the TV while listening to the hot nurse talk shit about urologists.

Op, just think about this when she's seeing your little captain, you'll be fine

 

[Patrick Bateman]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

Haha
Perfect

 

[Temp_User]

You know those on the job location scenarios you've watched in pornos? Yeah, don't ever expect them to happen.

Just relax and let the good doctor do her job.

 

[Violet_0]

you gave it a name, and the best you can come up with is Little Captain? I feel sorry for you

 

[massoluk]

Shit man I had a hot nurse try to stick a catheter up my dick, but for some reason it wouldn't go all the way in. Then another older lady nurse came in, but she couldn't do it either. They called in this other nurse, and this time it's a giant power lifter looking motherfucker. He failed as well.

So I had a hot nurse, a sweet middle aged lady, and a power lifter all staring intensely at my little ding dong trying to get this thing in. At one point the power lifter was like "it's like I'm hitting a brick wall in there".

Then they get this urologist to come in. He was pissed because he couldn't believe these nurses couldn't do it. He initially had trouble as well, but then he got frustrated and forced it in like he was Dante doing that stinger move or some shit. I could feel it enter my bladder. It hurt so bad. He walked out complaining like "See? No problem. I don't see why you guys can't do this!"

Then I watched Jurassic Park 3 on the TV while listening to the hot nurse talk shit about urologists.

I swear to God some screenwriter on GAF is writing this scene down so hard for their next romantic comedy

 

[Purkake4]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

This.

 

[BigDes]

you gave it a name, and the best you can come up with is Little Captain? I feel sorry for you

Yeah OP, at least call it something like The Hammer or The Sword of Kings.

 

[Nightbird]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

It was worth it tapping on this thread for this lol

It's 1:30 AM here and I'm taking a shit and absolutely losing it on the toilet.

Same here, just make it 7:40 Am lol

 

[Trouble]

why cant any of you fuckers just be normal people

lol

Seriously, worrying about manscaping and appearance? C'mon. She is a medical professional.

 

[Despera]

The only thing I'd worry about is having a boner. So jerk off a couple times before going , I guess.

This is hilarious.

Do you really think a professional doctor would give two shits about your boner?

 

[ModBot]

Surely, there is a better place for this topic as its own thread. A place that's not here.