Games Giveaway (PC) - Helping DocSeuss


Jul 30, 2012

Update post from the Doctor:

Had a doctor's visit today.

1) She tells me I'm really smart (she's seen the brain scans, so I guess she'd know) and that I'm making good progress.

2) She tells me about a new form of one of the things I'm supposed to take. Should reduce the massive headaches I get, meaning I can actually take it more often.

3) She helps me refine the things I need. Some additions, some subtractions. Overall, it's more focused. Basic lifestyle adjustments too. Lots of the things I've been doing this year are actually good.

4) Still no 'name' for what I have, so it's still gonna be hard to explain to people. Short version is still "my body doesn't process things it's exposed to the way it's supposed to, so that impacts everything from endocrine production to the production of ATP."

5) She gave me a discount on the treatment I need most, so I went ahead and did that. I feel so amazing. It's like... if you've ever walked at the bottom of a deep scuba tank, imagine that pressure. With this treatment, I feel like I've just surfaced and can move normally. It's incredible. Too bad I can't get this every day, which is what I seem to need. That's me, all the time, but with more pain and fatigue.

6) My former EEG/neuro therapist saw me; we talked for about an hour. She gave me a great big hug at the end. Emotionally, this was incredible.

You guys did this. You guys are improving my quality of life--saving it, actually. I can't afford all the things she recommended yet, but yeah. This is going to work. Healthwise, I'll be okay in no time.

Nothing's changed on the job front, still waiting to hear back about the investigation into my dismissal. Fingers crossed the ex-boss gets some sweet, sweet justice and I find employment or get a game kickstarter going before the Fall.

Right now, it feels like I'm hanging on a rope that's about to snap, but I'm feelin' like... "yeah, I can get out of this. Not sure how yet, but I will."

Anyways, yeah, for personal reasons, I've got myself suspended from GAF for a while.

Don't worry.

Should come bearing nice surprises, if the timeline works out.

I appreciate all your help. I can definitely still use more. But I'm hopeful now, and happy. I legitimately feel like I can survive this now, more than I have before. I love you guys. Peace.
I don't even know where to begin. I shouldn't even be here. I should be flying planes for a living. Turns out planes and I don't mix--the avgas doesn't get along with my particular makeup. Discovered this in flight school. It made me drop out for a long time. Extreme pain, sleeping eighteen hour days, eventually nine months going to a doctor trying to put the pieces of my life back together. I'm still nowhere near 100%. The worst problems are chronic pain and chronic fatigue. I feel like I can't stop moving, or I'll die, but at the same time, I don't have the strength to keep going. I'm crashing, burning myself out. I feel like I'm dying.

Still, I could survive, if I had an income. Yeah, my health prevents me from the one thing I feel born to do, but I mean, if I could go to work, everything would be good, right? And I do have a job, so there's that. I help teachers out--because, yeah, I returned to school to learn to do something else, and the only job I could find was helping teachers on campus. The teachers all seem to love me. Every time I talk to them, they're great. We greet each other in the halls, they compliment me to my boss, and all sorts of stuff. Basically, I've got it made, right?


For whatever reason, my boss has taken a dislike to me. Never mind that everyone else seems to like me. She doesn't, and she's looking for reasons to do so. Apparently, she asks other people how I perform at work. She doesn't ask about other workers, and she doesn't ask me any of this, but she asks them. Constantly. I led a group project, creating a new training manual, and she was asking my partner if I did any of the work at all, because, for whatever reason, she couldn't fathom that I would do any work. When people make random remarks, she misinterprets them, seemingly deliberately, so I get in trouble. If I tell someone I'm training that we can help students do just about anything other than do their homework for them, she turns it into "oh, I heard you are telling trainees that they are only allowed to answer technical questions."

When she did my review, I ended up doing pretty well. She didn't like that I "didn't know some stuff," (for instance, I'm not allowed to call our tech guy, I have to call regular tech support, then forward that ticket to her, which she will send to tech guy) and that I was "too personal."

Apparently, "too personal" is "hey, listen, you know I NEVER miss work, but I need to talk to the food stamp people. They've mandated that I come to a meeting at a specific time, and they'll deny me benefits if I don't go, so I have to. Please let me go an hour early today." She was totally fine with letting me leave early, but hated that I sent her an email explaining this. This is the same person who likes telling me how she had vomiting and diarrhea all night 'cause of some bad food, or how her daughter is going to need to see the doctor for various maladies, or whatever.

Mid-semester, she hired a new worker to take over one hour that needed filling. Multiple people could have taken it, and mid-semester hiring is unprecedented. She used this opportunity to cut my hours in half. "It's better for the team if you're capped at a certain number of hours," she told me. Bear in mind, I started needing to be on food stamps. Now it's worse. By the way, when I say "cut," I mean that she made it so I work one hour, don't work an hour, work an hour, don't work an hour, work three hours, don't work ninety minutes... and on and on. And that's just one day. I did the math. Based on my pay rate and the time she makes me waste at work, I should be making about $400 more than I need to.

She drops all these hints that she's not satisfied with my performance, or that I'm doing well, but reviews constantly show I'm actually great. I've seen her lie to other people about unrelated things. She constantly tries to find reasons to get on my case, then emails the whole department with thinly-veiled "guys, we can do better" stuff based on her misinterpretation of things I've done. She levels criticisms at me that nobody in the department, many of whom are my friends, have uttered.

...aaaand she's telling people that she won't keep me employed during the summer, when she told me "oh, during the summer, you'll actually work more hours here than you do now." Frustratingly, she's emailed me saying that hours are confidential, and I'm not allowed to talk to anyone about my schedule. A department-wide email was sent asking all of us for the hours we wanted. I asked for a reasonable amount--and I'm receiving financial aid that means that it costs her nothing to employ me (government pays school to keep me around) for the duration of the summer, even at maximum hours--she has recently been hinting at me that I shouldn't get my hopes up about hours, saying "I'm not the one who will be doing the scheduling, since I won't be here this summer." Her second-in-command, who will be running the show this summer, is baffled by this, saying "yeah, she's setting up the schedule; I don't know why she would tell you that."

Coworkers describe her as "psycho," saying she has it out for me for no reason any of them can tell. "She just hates you. I don't know why."

I haven't seen a doctor in years. I'm in enormous amounts of pain. Some days, it even hurts to get out of bed. I force myself through waves of pain and nausea so I can pretend to be remotely normal. I'm getting training here that should eventually net me a job, which I can use to pay for medical treatment, get better, and survive. All I want to do right now is survive, but lately, I wake up every day wanting to know just why it is I'm still alive, because I certainly don't feel like living.

I don't know how to function any more.

I just put the last of my money into my gas tank, so I can go to class tomorrow. If I keep my grades up, I can keep going to school. If I can go to school, I can keep getting financial aid. If I can stay on financial aid, I can avoid homelessness, but even that might not be enough to save me now. I'm not just here for me--my little brother couldn't afford school if I didn't come with. I can't leave, because if I do, it screws him over, and I want him to have a good shot at life.


What the fuck am I supposed to do?

EDIT: Accent, super cool guy, set this up to help me avoid homelessness this summer.
I have just been terminated from my job.

When asked why, I was told that there had been "complaints" about me.

I told her that after my positive review earlier in the semester, as well as random spot checks with teachers, I believed myself to be doing everything she asked for. She explained that there had been complaints, and I was not informed about them. I said I felt that letting me believe my conduct was appropriate without expressing any concerns was unjust. It allowed me no opportunity to change my actions.

She said "that's life," and "it's not my job to tell you these things," and "I can't tell you the specifics of these incidents." All she explained to me was that someone had complained I'd been "confrontational." I can't think of a single time I haven't been courteous and pleasant to any of the teachers, aside from one day when I was nauseated, and I apologized and said I wasn't feeling well. I mean, maaaaybe someone got upset when I told them they'd have to schedule the classroom first? But usually, I'm very obliging to any of the teachers I've worked for, and all of the ones I've asked about my behavior (I spot check myself asking for feedback) have been positive. FFS, yesterday, a teacher asked me if I would be back next semester, expressing a desire to work together.

I believe she's being dishonest with me. I have received "complaints" exactly once; they were detailed to me after my (positive!) review, and, as far as I am aware, all sprung from a conversation with a coworker who seems to like me. Seriously, I catch her smiling at me at random times, she's always super friendly and stuff... I don't even know. Heck, when I got my article published, and we changed shifts, she asked how I was, I said I'd gotten published, and she actually wanted to read my article. As in, she logged into her computer, pulled up the browser, and said "I want to read it." That doesn't really seem like someone who'd go behind my back to complain about me, much less lie to my face when I asked if there was anything I could do to improve as a coworker.

I feel my boss has been dishonest.

And I'm really



fucking scared about what I'm going to do about my life right now.
You can read more about the situation in the original thread here and in the aforementioned fundraiser page. Doc is a cool dude, and he needs all the help he can get right now. To help raise awareness/funds, I started this giveaway. Initially it was just Dark Souls II but a bunch of awesome people offered prizes, so now you have a lot to choose from!

Edit: If you'd like to enter, please just say something similar to "I would like [game]!". That's it! You can enter for multiple games(please make a new post if you've posted before, it's easier for me to keep track of!). Will be giving away games around 12:00 PM PST every day until we run out of prizes. Currently, what's available is:

Thomas Was Alonex2
Superbrothers: Sword & Sworcery EP
Velvet Assassin x2
No Time To Explainx1
Mini Motor Racing
Major Mayhem
Gun Monkeys
Aerena - Clash of Championsx2
Crayon Physics Deluxe
Hearts of Iron 3
Metal Drift
Race Injection
Zero Gear
Gun Metal
Dark Shadows - Army of Evil
I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream
Savant - Ascent
RACE: The WTCC Game + Caterham Expansio
Race On
Race Injection
GTR Evolution
GT Legends
Rush Bros
Edna & Harvey - Harvey's New Eyes
A New Beginning - Final Cut
Guns of Icarus Online
One Finger Death Punch
Ku: Shroud of the Morrigan
Ultionus: A Tale of Petty Revenge
Litil Divil
Rock of Ages

We have more stuff coming.
Dec 24, 2011
I would like Dark Souls 2(PC) or Batman: Arkham Origins(PC) or Assassin's Creed IV (PC) or Deadly Premonition: Director's Cut or Daylight

and I support DocSeuss :)


Fujiwara Tofu Shop
Mar 27, 2013
Damn, hang in there, man. I hope everything turns up for you, doc. I read the first thread when it was posted, sorry to hear it got worse. :(

I want Dark Souls 2.
Mar 26, 2012
Lawrence, KS
If my feelings weren't all used up, I'd probably be crying right now.

I love you guys.

If anyone has any protips on jobs or income or even dealing with chronic pain, and you wanna mention it over in my OT thread or a PM or whatever, I'd appreciate it. Money's a concern, but emotional support's an even bigger deal, I think.
Mar 26, 2012
Lawrence, KS
Hope everything works out well for you doc, and you seek some legal action against your old boss.

I own Dark Souls 2 on my ps3, so I don't need the PC version.
It's at-will. There's nothing I can do. HR basically said "sucks to be you."

I mean, I think she's bad at her job--a boss's responsibility is to address complaints about the workforce by, y'know, correcting behavior. Instead, apparently, she let this go on for a couple months. I believe she wanted to let me go from the get-go, so if there WERE any complaints (and this is a person who deliberately misinterpreted "help 'em with anything they need unless it's like... a straight-up test question" as "don't help anyone ever"), she just let them pile up until she could get rid of me. She didn't seem to want to run the "risk" of me becoming, y'know, a better worker. And I do believe I was the best, since I know for a fact I was handling other peoples' responsibilities and stuff.

But yeah, students only have at-will employment.

Right now, the ideal thing for me would be some sort of writing position. I can't really leave Lawrence, as I have another year before I graduate (and more importantly, my younger brother might not be able to stay in school if I wasn't around to be his roommate, and I'd never abandon one of my siblings). Beyond that, another job on campus is probably the best call--office positions aren't too physically strenuous and generally pay the bills.

The $1k figure in the fundraiser is somewhat arbitrary. It's just under about three months of living expenses, and doesn't cover things like soap/laundry/gas/tennis shoes/a doctor's appointment. None of this money is going to gaming or anything like that. If I get games this year, it's gonna be because I earned enough Playfire rewards or sold trading cards on Steam or whatever. I won't be spending real money until I have a new job that keeps me afloat.
Nov 4, 2013
I want Dark Souls 2.

DocSeuss, that sucks dude. Sounds like you're in a very similar situation to me my friend. I haven't been able to leave the house for the past 6 years because of Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (sever chronic fatigue). I had to quit my job because of it. I haven't paid rent for 4 months and I'm awaiting the phone to ring to tell me I'm gone. I don't answer the door or phone because of that. It sucks not having any money to pay the bills. I never knew a website existed where you can ask for donations. Personally, I would feel odd asking. Maybe I could look into it. Anything could be worth a shot at this point. I created this topic for gamers with illnesses Never caught much traction though. I hope you get all that's needed buddy.
Mar 26, 2012
Lawrence, KS
I want Dark Souls 2.

DocSeuss, that sucks dude. Sounds like you're in a very similar situation to me my friend. I haven't been able to leave the house for the past 6 years because of Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (sever chronic fatigue). I had to quit my job because of it. I haven't paid rent for 4 months and I'm awaiting the phone to ring to tell me I'm gone. I don't answer the door or phone because of that. It sucks not having any money to pay the bills. I never knew a website existed where you can ask for donations. Personally, I would feel odd asking. Maybe I could look into it. Anything could be worth a shot at this point. I hope you get all that's needed buddy.
Are you not able to get any kind of disability support? I'm trying to do that.

I do feel weird asking, but several people have said I need to. I didn't set this up--I got a PM asking if I was okay with it. Same with Accent's help; I was asked if he could set it up for me.


Feb 8, 2009
I want Dark Souls 2!

I also want the best for Doc as well and that I hope things work out. Dude is mad generous and everything as well.

Doc, I wish there was something that could be done about your boss.

edit - for pc; and cheers to the rest of the folks donating as well! Donated as well, best of luck Doc!