Try to get some friends who don't have a wii.
That's what I said. I want to meet lady-folk.
Try to get some friends who don't have a wii.
I should get friends. That way I can meet lady-folk through them.
I should get friends. That way I can meet lady-folk through them.
I should get friends. That way I can meet lady-folk through them.
I should get friends. That way I can meet lady-folk through them.
Lol, Do it man.
This is why I don't understand guys who are like dickish to girls that just wanna be pals. Chances are she has friends and odds are at least one of them is pretty.
I should get friends. That way I can meet lady-folk through them.
Eh, what is a league anyway? It's more likely the whining and self-deprecating attitude that shoots them down with hotter guys/girls. Believe it or not, but placing someone in another league from yourself, when we're all just humans, that's also a kind of objectifying. A bad attitude and low self-steem is gonna be way more likely reasons for not feeling attraction for someone else.My senator.
I never touched this thread, but I was curious. As a 30 Y/O very happily married man who has gone through the fire - finding a date can be emotionally draining, so I would personally avoid bars for hook-up purposes and stick to sites. I hate to say this, but several of the people in my personal experience who constantly whine about not being able to land even one date are gunning for a partner WAY out of their "league." There's more to life than conventional looks and/or financial success.
Definitely man, let me know! It would be a blast meeting up.Don't wait for it before trying yourself of course, but you, me and stn should totally hang out next year in London With some kind of housing help, I'd be more than willing to come by England for a weekend or more and hang out! It would be a blast!
Thanks for the post man!Dude, I read your post a couple of pages back and I'm sorry to hear about your lack of progress. But can I ask what sort of different things you've tried to get better? I mean, for some people clubbing just isn't it. And to quote Vaas from FarCry3: "The definition of stupidity is doing the same fucking thing over and over and over again. And expecting things to change."He might have gotten it from Einstein. Minus the fucking part of course. I'm just saying, try different things then clubbing, if there is something like that in your town.
And if you have the means, go travelling by yourself. If only for just a week. I just finished touring the US, with the last week being on my own, and it's sooo easy to start talking to new people, asking them where they're from. It's really great practice, and it helped me a lot in opening conversations and increasing my confidence. So much that a week later I joined a friend of mine at an expat evening through her work, where people go to learn Dutch. Just walk up to people, look at their name tag, see what language they want to learn, and start talking. After half an hour a cute Phillipine girl asked me for my number (first time that ever happened)
Of course these were a perfect combination of events. And the travelling might have worked for me, but won't for you. But still. Perhaps clubbing just isn't for you. I know I hate it. Perhaps there are other venues for you to come to meet other people?
I'm starting to become a lot more confident in a few aspects of my life (namely my artistic ability), and this certainly seems to be bouncing off of me in some way. I seem to be getting a lot more looks/smiles than I've ever had before, which in turn is fueling my self-esteem a bit.
I still can't approach (I've never been able to), but hopefully once I'm put into the right situation I'll start to open up further.
I also found out (from a friend) that a girl wanted to sleep with me, but thought I was too out of her league. The fact that anyone thinks I'm out of their league/wanted to sleep with me is frankly blowing my mind, and this is yet another confidence boost.
Definitely man, let me know! It would be a blast meeting up.
Thanks for the post man!
To be honest I've not really been to many clubs, mostly just bars, but having said that I don't really think they are for me. My mate suggested what sounds like a good one (with music more to my liking), so I'll see what that's like.
Traveling is definitely on the radar, and hopefully next year I'll get something sorted. This past September I went to Germany by myself for a few days (although I met up with friends there), and doing short breaks like that throughout next year is something I'm planning. Hopefully it'll help open me up even further!
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=90185249&postcount=11438
Roughly a month later, now. Didn't notice any replies (I did search to see if I was quoted). Anyone want to take a go? Hopefully my linked post is not a tl;dr...
I will add to my ending note there that I realize opportunities do not come along while "waiting" for them. I meant to imply more that I keep doing my current thing, continue to try and branch out socially, and see if more opportunities present themselves.
Successful friendships prove an ability to maintain a minimal level of good judgement and level of emotional IQ. Most sane people don't want to be their romantic partner's only friend.
Is there any girl in here ? Should girls be repulsive against someone who have a pectus excavatum And a ileostomy ?
I have no luck.
Alright! It's been December 16th in Sweden for 16 minutes, give or take, so let's start with our yearly recaps!
And happy birthday Dating-Age! An amazing year in many ways, dating or otherwise related stuff.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkocjjea5dY
I'll do my own writeup later, and I'll try to focus on what has been going on in my life and where I want to improve and go further!
Fuck, I don't have any friends, there goes my judgment and emotional IQ
Mostly yes to the last part. Always yes to the last part. Do you mind posting a picture of yourself? I have a bit of a baby face myself. So I grow out my beard, perhaps that works for you as well? That might put you in the stubble motherfucker category though
Wormdundee: That's awesome, man Congrats. And you're so right, you gotta love yourself first before others will. I recommend some slight caution with moving in with something after so little time, but you know her and your feelings the best. It is a pretty big step though. But if it feels good to be around her that closely (practice now!), feel free
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=90185249&postcount=11438
Roughly a month later, now. Didn't notice any replies (I did search to see if I was quoted). Anyone want to take a go? Hopefully my linked post is not a tl;dr...
I will add to my ending note there that I realize opportunities do not come along while "waiting" for them. I meant to imply more that I keep doing my current thing, continue to try and branch out socially, and see if more opportunities present themselves.
Based on what you posted, these are the only two issues I can find - one mental one physical. Get over the age nonsense (it's really a non-issue) and work your ass off to achieve what you want physically. You seem to have the rest down already.
I will PM, but yeah I can grow a goatee...it just looks bad on me IMO. Cannot do a full-on one (might be from acne scarring...hard to say). And of course I have nothing against your kind . That look is very much in (at least around here), and looking young and not being able to do it does make me look that much younger.
I personally have never seen a goatee that actually works. But you're not a bad looking guy. Perhaps your face is a bit round. Please don't take ANY offense whatsoever, but are you overweight? Because losing a few pounds might help in that regard? And why doesn't a bit of scruff work, do you have patchy facial hair or something?
Tkawsome also answered GutsOfThor's question too. Don't stress too much about what to say or what's the right timing. This isn't some situation where either you're perfect or you're gonna get shot down. (and if it is, you can't be perfect all the time anyways.)
I'll read your recap shortly Edit: i'm so jealous of your year man Those trips and their results are awesome! Makes me wanna go somewhere too!For Minamu: I'm still not completely sure it's healthy you're still in touch with your previous ex. You still seem to care a lot about her, and get hurt by her. And to me it seems like you're still hurting her as well. Wanting her "to see how good your life is without her" doesn't sound like a healthy attitude. And it's also an indication that no, you're life isn't good without her. Don't you think it would be easier if you'd just cut all contact?
I'm such a chicken shit lol. I never did message the girl and instead just forced the idea of it out of my head. It's been almost two weeks now so I guess I'll just forgot about it. Oh well, thanks for the advice anyways guys!
snip.
I'll read your recap shortly Edit: i'm so jealous of your year man Those trips and their results are awesome! Makes me wanna go somewhere too!
As for my ex, you might be right. When we fight over these topics, it doesn't feel very good, and she's clearly hurting right now as well since she's avoiding me. But being away from her feels wrong too of course. I miss being near her. We have our differences and grind our teeth at each other sometimes, but as I've told her, she feels like the yin to my yang, and partly because of that. I don't love her any less today nor am I angry at her. It very well may be that we're simply just hurting each other though, it certainly looks like it. Of course, the situation isn't frictionless at the moment because of this love triangle bs. As far as I know, that's the only reason why we haven't at least met up and hugged it out by now. She's the kind of girl who goes quiet and AWOL in the middle of a convo if I ask tough questions she uncomfortable with. I've tried getting her to at least tell me what kind of relationship they have and she can't give a proper answer to why she won't meet up with me, yet it's okay to talk online. Or if it's simply that she's afraid of falling in love again if we meet up in private. Even getting her to admit that she agrees that we aren't finished (though with the caveat that it might just mean as friends) took around 3 days of continuous talking. I know nothing about her situation because she's actively and purposefully staying quiet for whatever reason. Maybe I worded it wrong with my life and that. What I mean is that I won't delete her out of anger or anything and if she sees that I'm happy, she might be too, and perhaps even come back. I want her to be happy as well of course, I just want her to make some damn life choices, which is what she's probably angry at me for at the moment, which I find strange when I just want to help her. Playing two guys against each other while just sitting on the sidelines just watching isn't cool.
Life was pretty good without her, until she came back. I miss and love her as much as always, it's not just nostalgia I think. So no, my life isn't very good without her right now, simply because she awoke all the feelings again with her mere presence. I'm not sure cutting all contact and deleting her again is the way to go though, I've done that several times before and it was never the right choice in hindsight. I didn't have good objective reasons to leave her even though they felt legit. My reactions were guided by egotistical emotions thanks to immaturity. I've already said "fuck it, yolo" and left her on a whim several times and never considered the consequences, and they sucked even worse than the situation prior. However, I won't stick around if she decides that the other guy is better boyfriend material (how could he be? He already turned her down at least once afaik). That's why I've told her that she needs to make a choice as to not torture both me, him and herself. Fate won't solve this situation that she has created for herself, only she can. I'm still in this mess because there's still a slight chance she might see reason, you know?
It's too soon to say "drop it" but if you are going to contact her again I would do it after classes are over. The reason being is that you've already offered your assistance to her with studying so if she wants it she can contact you whenever.
If she doesn't, then contact her after classes are over by asking how she did in the class or something, and then chain combo that into a date request. If she rejects you for any reason at that point then I would put the ball in her court and move on. If she gets back to you great if not, no harm done as you've moved on.
Hello Gaf...here is my Bio
I am 26. Living with my parents. Gonna be finishing school in a week (will have a management and HR Bach degrees). I have zero sexual experience. Haven't kissed a girl since I was 7. Ive been trying to get out more and I work a retail store, Ive been taking some of the females out to lunch and it goes alright, but never amounts to anything.
Story...It's a long one, but entertaining
So about 3 weeks ago, I saw one of the female cashiers (23 with 2 kids) sitting outside on her break, so I stopped by and we chat for her whole 15 minute break, she was pretty cool, so I decided to look on the schedule and see when our schedules met up, so we could both go out to lunch. The only day was black Friday, so we drove to Sonic (fast food). That went pretty well.
Skip to last Wednesday, I was walking in front of the registers and getting ready to head outside, when she stopped me and ask me when my lunch was, and she getting off while I was going to lunch, so she invited me out to lunch. We then go out to lunch again (she just got a coffee from starbucks and I got something from another store's deli). As we were driving there, I told I go out just about every weekend. Then this is how the convo goes after I tell her that...
"So do you just bring women to your parents house?"
"No thats what motels are for"
"!, Are you a manwhore!?
"Manwhore!?
She also told me on this outing that she lives in a small town with a bunch of sluts, but that she was not one. That outing went pretty well too, so now I decided to make a move on Friday (2 days after) when we both worked again, and finally get her #, so me and her can do shit outside of work.
Friday rolls around. She goes out to her car for lunch and I stop by and chat. She sees me shivering, so she tells me to get in her car (its 23 F outside). So after like 15 minutes of talking, I say...
"So since your done with school and I'll be done with school at the end of this next week (This week now)", How about you and I go out and celebrate"
"Yeah I'm up for that"
"Alright, so to make this a little easier, can I get your number so I can just text you and it'll be a little easier to plan it out?"
"Um, I don't know about that. Ive had problems with other guys when I gave them my number, they would harass me. Once we hang out a bit more, you can have it"
So we talk for another 15 minutes and she is telling me that she wont be able to get home, because of the snow and ice going up a big hill. So she told me she might be going to her mom's that lives 45 minutes away, but doesn't really want to, because she her and her mom are on bad terms, so I offer to take her out when she gets off that evening (I got off at 6:30, she got off at 8:30). She says yeah possibly, and mentions that we should could go out to a bar or just grabbing a 12 pack and get a motel.
Alright, my interest was just super peaked at that point.
She is still unsure, so I tell I'll just check back with her as leaving work, so I check back with her and she say...
"I don't know, what do you want to do?"
"Alright, we're going out then, I'll be back in 2 hours to pick you up"
"Cool, I get off at 8:30"
So I get home and pack, clothes, contact lens case, phone charger, latex (lol), etc...
I get back at 8:30 and pick her up. I ask her what she wants to do. She says she doesn't care. Went to a local bar with Karaoke. We talk for half hour and have a couple of drinks, I sing 1 song and we play one game of pool. There wasn't alot of people, and I could tell she wasn't having that much fun. She quit right in the middle of the game of pool and said she couldn't believe she was playing that bad. So I ask if she wants to go to the city where her mom is (to another bar or motel), or just stick around here and go to another bar. She wants to go to another local bar.
But she wants to stop by a store and grab some sweats, so she can get out of her work pants. We go to the store and she picks up some pants and since we were going to another bar, didn't really think of picking up and alcohol at the store.
We go to a pick up bar, that has a lot more people. We talk for about an hour, and she says this...
"I hope no one at work thinks we're going out"
"Lol, why do you care? You'll be leaving this job in 3-4 months anyway"
"Yeah"
So we have about 2 more drinks each (I'm a little buzzed by this point, she is sober. We are both 5'7, but I am like 130 and she is like 170-180...Do the math). At this point she is really getting tired, so I ask her if she wants to leave and just get a motel. She says yes. I have a hard time finding any cheap motels on my phone, so I go ask the bouncer and says there is one like 250 feet from the bar.
We drive there, and there is no one at the front desk, except for one of the cleaning ladies. She trys to help us, but after like 10 minutes of waiting, she cant figure out how to charge my debit card. The lady says we'll have to just go somewhere else.
We then go to a 2nd motel and this time there is someone at the front desk this time, but she is a noob. Has a hell of time finding the correct paper work and just cursing up a storm. By this point, my friend (or whatever) is looking frustrated. 15 minutes later, after filling out some paper work, we get the keys to our room (standard queen bed room), We have to go outside (where its like 20 F outside), freezing our balls off, we finally find the room. I put the key in, open the door and find a half naked man, and a half naked women laying on top of the bed watching tv. That guy speaks up right away and says, wrong room.
We can't believe what just happened. Go back and tell the desk girl what happened. She can't find anymore queen rooms, but tells us she'll just us a 2 twin bed room and charge us for a queen. She walks with us this time and makes sure it doesn;t happen again.
No one is in there this time, so we get in, she takes the 1st bed and immediately plops down on the bed. I kind of stand there for a second and all thats going through my head was...
"I'm not a slut"
"I hope no one at work thinks we're going out"
PLus I was just thinking how tired and not happy she looked in the lobby.
So I decided not to try anything.
I grabbed the other bed, changed and hop in bed like 10 minutes later.
We both fall asleep about 1 am and both awake at 6 am.
We talk for a few minutes, then she says...
"Are you mad at me for not sleeping with you?"
"No..............What, were just expecting that as soon as we walked through the door, that I was just gonna jump on top of you?"
"Yeah...........I mean you also didn't even really try to sleep with me..........I was also surprised you went to the other bed. You could have slept with me in this bed"
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"Well I know now for the future"
Fuck man that was awful! Massive failure!!!!!
So we leave the hotel and are driving back to work to pick up her car. She first says we should stop by starbacks and grab some coffee. About half way there, she starts feeling around looking for her keys, she cant find them and doesn't remember having them last night. We get to her car and the keys are laying in the passenger seat
We call a few lock smiths...one says they can be there in 40 minutes. She has to give them her phone #, so they can call her whatever reason (she is using my phone, because her phone is dead)...after the phone call, she says "well there was your chance to get my phone number, did you get it?" I didn't, but mentioned about 5 minutes later that, they wont be able to call her, since her phone is dead. She calls back, and has to give her phone number again ( i memorize it), then I give them my number. When I hang up, i put her number in my phone real quick, then ask if I got it right...she says dammit lol...So in the mean time, we go to starbucks for coffee and breakfast. That was alright.
Lock smith got there like a minute after we got back, we were both standing outside freezing while the guy was getting the car unlocked, we were both shaking, so i put my arm around her and and pull her in. The guy finishes and its $100 for the job.
She invites me to lunch at Taco Bell (she drives this time) and eat there.
We agree to go out again on next week.
I'll read your recap shortly Edit: i'm so jealous of your year man Those trips and their results are awesome! Makes me wanna go somewhere too!
As for my ex, you might be right. When we fight over these topics, it doesn't feel very good, and she's clearly hurting right now as well since she's avoiding me. But being away from her feels wrong too of course. I miss being near her. We have our differences and grind our teeth at each other sometimes, but as I've told her, she feels like the yin to my yang, and partly because of that. I don't love her any less today nor am I angry at her. It very well may be that we're simply just hurting each other though, it certainly looks like it. Of course, the situation isn't frictionless at the moment because of this love triangle bs. As far as I know, that's the only reason why we haven't at least met up and hugged it out by now. She's the kind of girl who goes quiet and AWOL in the middle of a convo if I ask tough questions she uncomfortable with. I've tried getting her to at least tell me what kind of relationship they have and she can't give a proper answer to why she won't meet up with me, yet it's okay to talk online. Or if it's simply that she's afraid of falling in love again if we meet up in private. Even getting her to admit that she agrees that we aren't finished (though with the caveat that it might just mean as friends) took around 3 days of continuous talking. I know nothing about her situation because she's actively and purposefully staying quiet for whatever reason. Maybe I worded it wrong with my life and that. What I mean is that I won't delete her out of anger or anything and if she sees that I'm happy, she might be too, and perhaps even come back. I want her to be happy as well of course, I just want her to make some damn life choices, which is what she's probably angry at me for at the moment, which I find strange when I just want to help her. Playing two guys against each other while just sitting on the sidelines just watching isn't cool.
Life was pretty good without her, until she came back. I miss and love her as much as always, it's not just nostalgia I think. So no, my life isn't very good without her right now, simply because she awoke all the feelings again with her mere presence. I'm not sure cutting all contact and deleting her again is the way to go though, I've done that several times before and it was never the right choice in hindsight. I didn't have good objective reasons to leave her even though they felt legit. My reactions were guided by egotistical emotions thanks to immaturity. I've already said "fuck it, yolo" and left her on a whim several times and never considered the consequences, and they sucked even worse than the situation prior. However, I won't stick around if she decides that the other guy is better boyfriend material (how could he be? He already turned her down at least once afaik). That's why I've told her that she needs to make a choice as to not torture both me, him and herself. Fate won't solve this situation that she has created for herself, only she can. I'm still in this mess because there's still a slight chance she might see reason, you know?
Haha indeed, I'm very much aware of this, and the irony it brings to the table We met back in the end of October 2012 and got together in January. I do think she's worth it, I mean, I have dropped her in a heartbeat twice and while it had a positive effect in other areas of my life, it always felt like the wrong decision in hindsight. As much as my feelings were hurt, not having her in my life hurt more.You know if someone else posted all this you'd be telling them to drop her in heartbeat, right? Obviously that's easier said than done, but how long have you two been at this for? Is she really worth it?
I'm not offended, don't worry. I wouldn't post about it if I was scared of some well deserved flak. She has moved on for sure, she did that awfully fast, and I obviously haven't at all. I'm not sure I'd say she has a boyfriend, he wasn't into her like that during the summer at least, but she's not single either. Who he is and all that isn't relevant, I don't know her friends at all anyway. I know it's not up to me to help her with life choices, or make them for her, I told her exactly that. But she's avoiding them altogether and expects fate to solve everything for her. I've just offered some assistance (and that's hard to do in a constructive way without knowing all the facts). She can take it or leave it of course. She reached out to me just to say hi and that it felt good to see me again when things ended in such a negative way. Even though we got into the deeper and emotional areas very quickly, we've had some very relaxed and enjoyable conversations almost every day for the past 2+ weeks. We only communicate over text and facebook, which always led to misunderstandings before, which is why I've pushed for meeting in person now because I don't want to repeat the same mistakes, something she has refused because of the other guy (which I think is weird because I really don't see much of a difference between talking to an ex on facebook and irl). Yeah, I hurt her very much and she does make me feel like the bad guy, and I am in many ways. I have no problem with her being reluctant, I am too, but I do think we owe it to ourselves to explore the possibilities when we have admitted to still being curious about each other. It's just, in her words, that she isn't as curious about it now because of our past as I am, and because she doesn't want to risk losing the new guy by going back to someone who has hurt her before. I'd feel the same way honestly so I don't have a problem with that per se. But I do think it's wrong to be talking to the both of us. It'd be one thing if she said that she isn't interested in my feelings and that she's happy with the other guy, that's perfectly fine, then I'd be able to move on and wish her the best. But even with all my cards laid out on the table, we've kept talking and on her request, even though it bugs me because of him, have kept it on a day-to-day basis just to see what happens. Knowing how I feel for her and what I want, no matter how you toss it, I don't think that's very nice to the other guy, right? We've been testing the waters most likely behind his back. And at the same time, she can go back to him and cuddle or whatever at any second during a conversation with me, getting my hopes up over nothing, which makes me feel used. That's essentially why I feel that some decisions and serious talks need to be had with all sides separately because this can't go on forever, right? But she clearly doesn't agree with my view of things, since she has ignored me since Saturday and my message although clearly stated as not angry or intended as mean must've hurt her yet again. I just don't think this mess can sort itself out with the help of inaction. On the other hand, my actions clearly push her away, not towards me xDPlease don't take this the wrong way, I don't mean to sound like an asshole, but from your description it sounds like she already tried to move on. She really has no obligation to tell you about her boyfriend. It's not up to you to help her with her life choices. Of course I don't know how she's communicating towards you, if she's trying to keep in touch or whatever. But it sounds like you really, really hurt her (as you are well aware yourself), and she's very reluctant to get involved with you again. And it really sucks, especially if you feel about her the way you do, but you guys broke up. You can try everything in your power to make something work again. But I do not think she has any obligation towards you. This might come of as harsh, but it just might be that you had your chance, and you unfortunately blew it.
No, you're still in this mess because you think she might choose you, and from the (perhaps limited) info I got you're sort of pressuring her into things she might not want to talk about.
And you say you're a better boyfriend. But sorry my friend, that's not up to you to decide. If you break it off now for good, it won't be, or shouldn't be, for a whimsical yolo lifestyle. But for your, and hers, peace of mind. Again, I'm not trying to be a dick.
y r girls confusing?