Calvinpewpewpew
Neo Member
Thanks for the rage comics, I love them!
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BioWare Apologizes for Mass Effect: Deception Errors [Comic: Chapter 16 - Complete]
- Thread starter LiK
- Start date
Ciastek3214
Junior Member
"Shepard discovers that the ultimate weapon to destroy the Reapers is cereal. But since Kai Leng ate last one from Anderson's apartment the Galaxy seems to be doomed. But Shepard has got an idea. He kidnapps Kai Leng from The Illusive Man's private quarters and opens his intestines to find parts of cereal he hasn't digested. Shepard succeds and gives the samples of Galaxy's Last Hope(tm) to Mordin to recreate the structure and start maxing a cereal cannon that will destroy a Reaper in one single shot. So Shepard and the crew start to slaughter Reapers while Epic Music(tm) plays in the background. After the war is over Joker proposes to EDI and tries to kiss her but gets electrocuted and dies. EDI is shocked by that tragic event and commits suicide also making whole Normandy explode. Next day there is a funeral to say good bye to Galaxy saviors. Same day The Shepard's Favorite Cereal In The Galaxy is beign produced. It beats records in sales because literally every person buyes them and eats them. But another tragic event happens and every living creature starts dying from The Awesomeness Overload, disease that is caused by eating Shepard's cereal. Everyone dies but their souls gather in one place what causes Galaxy to implode. The end."
LumpOfCole
Member
I wish someone would photoshop Kai Leng on a box of 'Special Kai' cereal.
God, you are such a crybaby
LumpOfCole
Member
Reddit meme faces fit Deception's characters pretty well.
Riposte
Member
Am I a better human being for listening to the audiobooks while I play games with virtually no story? I mean what's the difference at that point?
ElectricBlue187
Member
I think we're past being worried about deception spoilers at this point...is it sex? I think just taking out the parts that refer to their age would solve that problem, leave it ambiguous
LumpOfCole
Member
I might have got a tad ahead of myself and inadvertently put some of Chapter 5 into the Chapter 4 comic (Gillian getting new implants). Oopsie. Doesn't matter though, she gets them while Kai Leng does his killing McCann business.
Arjen
Member
No not sex, i think the book litterly says, "there's nothing they can do about it because xxx is an adult"
One of them goes on a solo revenge quest to find her father's killer, one of the joins an underground resitance fraction, now technicly it's not impossible, but very very unlikly that a 15 year old autistic girl travels on her own to the most dangerous city in the galaxy to find her fathers killer
Riposte
Member
I remember the comic series ruined the Illusive Man for me. Then again, Mass Effect 3 ruined him even further by throwing out anything of importance in the 2nd game, just like the 2nd game did for the 1st. God, what a- where is that hate thread...
EDIT: full spoilers are not on Wikipedia. Hmmm, I kind of want to know what happens in the end.
EDIT: full spoilers are not on Wikipedia. Hmmm, I kind of want to know what happens in the end.
Extra Sauce
Member
Book is called Deception, so technically every inaccuracy in it is accurate.
BioWare apologizes for massive downward slide into sex scenes since KotOR1 release.
Also lump don't stop with these until you have the whole books summery done. And then do it for the fixed version.
LumpOfCole
Member
I have a theory that there isn't going to be a fixed version. By Bioware stating that there's "going to be" a fixed version, they get to subtlety strike Deception from the canon without potentially wrecking some business relationships.
Deception doesn't simply have problems that can be fixed. Every aspect of it is broken - storytelling, age of characters, personalities of characters, relationships of characters, technology not matching with established canon, biotics not matching with established canon, biology of species not matching with established canon. Everything from incorrect security protocols (DNA scanners being retconned into laughable retinal scanners) to incorrect culture protocols (quarians not disinfecting anything after their space battle) means that on every single level, the book is broken.
The book is so thoroughly incorrect on every single layer that it has actually become the most memorable book of the series, and actually one of the most memorable books I've ever read. To say it's a textbook example of how not to write a piece of tie-in fiction is not even suitable enough. It's the paragon example of how to not write a novel.
Dietz cannot even shoulder the entire blame. The editing for this book was either completely lacking or non-existent (there's a passage where Gillian is looking at a security console or something similar, and the author refers to Gillian as Kahlee accidentally back and forth throughout the passage). The spelling of some alien names change from page to page. No care was given to the franchise or consistency on any level.
This book's sole value comes across in its unintended literary comedy and its academic worth as an exercise in what it takes to make a novel that utterly fails on every conceivable level. Deception sets the lowest bar for media tie-in fiction that ever existed. For these reasons (and these reasons only) is why I believe this book is worth owning and reading.
They can't remove their age. Like Arjen said, they'd still be killers on some sort of revenge trip.
*Massive Deception Spoilers*
Also they both die.
Kai Leng kills Gillian.
With a toothbrush.
No joke.
Kai Leng kills Gillian.
With a toothbrush.
No joke.
The whole book was basically a, "lol this series is stupid."
Ciastek3214
Junior Member
I would like to come up with Mass Effect 3 ending involving toothbrushes as the ultimate weapon to destroy The Reapers but fuck it. It's 12 PM here.
ElectricBlue187
Member
I wonder if the guy who wrote it was forced to do it so he was like 'fuck this shit i'm going to make this as awful as I can'
Sneaky Gato
Member
I have to wonder if something like Game Workshops Black Library would work out in the video game industry where you would have a dedicated cadre of authors whose work would go through a vigorous QA session and have them employed full time with intricately plotted out plots and lines planned out long ahead of time.
LumpOfCole
Member
Chapter 05:
Azure Dream
Member
The reworked book should just be a printed copy of the rage comic.
EatChildren
Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
Sounds legit.
Reading the book now, and it's every bit as legitimately awful as people said.
Reading the book now, and it's every bit as legitimately awful as people said.
LumpOfCole
Member
The Mass Effect wiki summary still stops right before the part where Kai Leng eats cereal in Anderson's apartment, as if the editor who was doing the wiki just threw his hands up in the air and said "screw this" and just stopped.
MrTroubleMaker
Member
I'm pretty sure the Wiki is going to skip covering deception. It made their job too hard or something.
Mass Effect wiki - open letter requesting Deception to be non-canon
They really splurged on that one.
Where are we going to be trading demo tokens?
Mass Effect wiki - open letter requesting Deception to be non-canon
They really splurged on that one.
Where are we going to be trading demo tokens?
Haunted
Member
Why would they need permission from Bioware, what the hell? It's not their wiki. The wiki community seems to have reached a consensus, so just stick a note on the book's page that it isn't considered canon and be done with it.
MrTroubleMaker
Member
I don't consider anything to be canon unless it's in the game
Azure Dream
Member
They could just slap an "Elseworlds" sticker on the cover of the existing books.
"There! Fixed!"
ThoseDeafMutes
Member
I don't consider anything to be canon unless it's in the game
What is your stance on canon regarding Codex vs On Screen stuff vs Dialogue? E.g. ME1, slow-flying missiles getting shot out of the main guns on cruisers instead of slugs, all fights occurring at near-point blank range, the citadel defense fleet being nowhere near the relay despite dialogue explicitly saying they were stationed near the relay to defend, or in ME2 where the 'GARDIAN laser defense towers' are obviously firing solid slugs, complete with huge recoil? Lets not forget Jacob's dad having modern mechs and thermal clips all over despite being marooned since before those were invented.
Canon is determined by the owners of the property, not the fanbase. It's Bioware's universe, so whatever they say is canon is so. Contradictory materials already existed long before this book, even though it is probably the worst example of it.
Arjen
Member
I don't consider anything to be canon unless it's in the game
Meh, the first book has a great backstory on what happened with Anderson and Saren, which is even mentioned in-game.
Riposte
Member
Seems like they squandered whatever storyline they had going in the books. Stuff like that always irks me, even if I don't care much what is going on. Didn't this time because the game series seems to be making a joke of its themes and storyline, so why put much consideration in the books(since they are not represented in the games at all). Given how the book before this one ends, it would be extremely easy just to reset it. As far as I can tell
In any case I just want to know:
What are the chances the following characters will appear in ME3?
everything basically stays the same except Gillian comes back and dies. She was already removed from the story by being put on a Quarian ship in the outreaches of known space, maybe even safe from whatever war that will go down with the Reapers.
In any case I just want to know:
What are the chances the following characters will appear in ME3?
Kai Leng
Kahlee, w/e the doctor chick
Kahlee, w/e the doctor chick
Arjen
Member
I have no idea, but i hope at least Kahlee will make an appearance in ME3, she's been in all the books so i'd be kind of dissapointed if she isn't in it.
cbrotherson
Member
The cereal part is brilliantly depicted in the comic although I have to admit, if someone tried to explain to me a scene where a hitman decides to have a Pop-Tart while waiting for his target I'd probably react the same way ;-)
That said, at least it became an actual defining (and very clever) plot point in Pulp Fiction. This novel makes it sound like a pretty arbitrary moment, to say the least
That said, at least it became an actual defining (and very clever) plot point in Pulp Fiction. This novel makes it sound like a pretty arbitrary moment, to say the least
Chapter 05:
words words words words words words unjustified "rage face" words words words
words words "rage face" words words words words "rage face" words words words
words words words words words words words words words words words words
"rage face" words words words words words words words words words words words
LOL so fahny XD what a great comic huh guize? so funny punchlines totally a comic XDDDD
I fail to see how this "comic" serves any purpose. I read the previous books but didn't get this one. Then I read the list of mistakes and was happy with that decision. But this horrid monstrosity... what is it? I don't need 100 copy-pasted faces that don't even properly match the events depicted to inform me that the book has a bunch of dumb errors in it. I figured that out by reading the OP.
Kai Leng
It's allowing some of us to get the idea of what happens in the book without having to read it.
It's also pretty funny, and I know I'm not the only one who thinks that. If you don't like it, you can just skip over it, you know?
Lostconfused
Member
There are shots of Kai Leng in like the very first Game Informer reveal.
I would appreciate it if someone attempted to actually draw what happened. Even bad MS Paint versions would be nice. Because, you know, it's completely my fault for scrolling down this page and allowing those horrid things to stab me in the eyes for the hundred thousandth time.
U MAD?
GrizzNKev said:
U MAD.
Don't like the comics, here's a hint: Scroll past the "Mass Effect: Deception [Up: Comic 6+]" title and go to another Mass Effect thread (like oh, say "GAF plays: Mass Effect series [Unmarked Spoilers]") and you won't get "stabbed in the eyes" with "rage comics."
LumpOfCole
Member
Except for the Doc Brown embellishment I used to try and explain Gillian's autism disappearing and her 3 year age increase (thus the reason I put the logo+chapter after that part), the comic matches up with the events in the book rather tragically.
ElectricBlue187
Member
Yes it is your fault, now be a dear and gtfaway